Be a Strong Woman: Carnegie's Book of Spiritual Growth for Women

Chapter 14 Calmness is the Deepest Taste of a Woman (2)
Some people say that they are on a straight line of ordinary and monotonous life every day, walking along a straight line from the same starting point and at the same speed to the end point.Day in and day out, the roads I walk are less than 50 meters apart, doing the same things, seeing the same people, and saying the same things with similar meanings, so my life is monotonous, and I seldom feel excited, excited, or even sleepless nights. Dream.How many people live a life that sounds so plain like boiling water?However, life requires an ordinary woman who knows how to enjoy it to savor it with her heart.When savoring carefully, you will find that besides the ordinary and trivial, there are actually so many beautiful fragments in life.

For example, after a day of work, you are so tired that you fall on the sofa, and your child runs over sensiblely and says, Mom, let me give you a back massage; one day, your husband suddenly sends you a bouquet of roses. You said, wife, today is the fifth anniversary of our acquaintance; in ordinary days, I occasionally receive a gentle greeting from a distant friend... These are real fragments of life, although plain, but beautiful and touching.

Life is a bottle of all kinds of flavors, sweet, sour, bitter and hot. The same thing, different people taste different tastes, it depends on what kind of state of mind we use to feel and appreciate, and from what angle we look at it.Only women who know how to taste ordinary life can maintain their unique charm in life.They live an ordinary life, but have active thoughts. They understand that material is the basic condition for human existence, but spirit is the nutrient component of the human body. Only in a full spiritual world can life have color and breath.In the face of vanity, she smiled peacefully; in the face of other people's suffering, she was willing to help; in the face of hypocrisy, she responded silently.She knows how to color life and taste the sweetness in the ordinary.And to treat life with this optimistic and graceful attitude, what life rewards her must also be beautiful.

A contented woman is a real wise man

A contented woman will not envy other people's husbands who are outstanding, she thinks that the one that suits her is the best.Although there are many excellent men, they are not necessarily suitable for themselves.Just like shoes, only you know whether you are comfortable or not, so you don't have to worry about it.

A contented woman will not envy other women's superior life. She believes that having a prosperous and wealthy family does not necessarily mean happiness.And my quiet, indifferent, leisurely and carefree life is not a kind of happiness.

A contented woman will not envy other people's children who are outstanding and have top grades.She believes that children are hope, and what they need most is a warm and comfortable family atmosphere. It is more important for children to grow up healthily and happily in such an environment.

A contented woman treats her friends and neighbors with kindness, virtuousness and kindness, and does not care about the gains and losses of her neighbors. Therefore, she often has the best reputation. Occasionally, there are conflicts between husband and wife, and it is always her husband who is blamed by others.

A contented woman will not be fussy about things, will not ask her husband's whereabouts, and will not check her husband's wallet and notepad.Let the husband feel the warmth and tranquility of home, no matter how busy he is at work, he will miss his home.

A contented woman will not dig out a man's privacy out of nothing, she will treat and respect a man's privacy kindly, and truly win his heart.

A contented woman is serious about everything she does.Will arrange the home clean and tidy, elegant and comfortable.Stir-frying and cooking pay attention to nutrition, which will make husband and children feel that home is the warmest harbor and the most comfortable leisure residence.

To be a healthy, happy and happy contented woman is not a kind of joy, life is simple, why is it so complicated; to be a healthy, happy and happy contented woman is not a kind of detachment But a passionate heart loves life; being a healthy, happy, and happy contented woman is not a kind of satisfaction, accepting what you have happily, and always facing everything around you with a grateful heart.

A woman must know how to be content and always be grateful. Only in this way can she maintain a long-lasting enthusiasm for life and avoid becoming vulgar in the years.What you see is what you think, what you see is happiness when you have passion in your heart, what you see is happiness when you have happiness in your heart.This is what a mature woman should achieve.

A woman's contentment is a man's blessing
For married women, contentment is particularly important.Dissatisfied wives often complain that their husbands are ignoring their efforts. Are we ignoring their efforts?If everything he does is taken for granted by his wife without gratitude, there is no doubt that the husband will slack off and stop pleasing his wife.

In the past, people often said: "Men are women's warm harbor." In fact, women are men's warm harbor.Having a contented wife at home is the greatest blessing for a man.

Men, on the outside and at home, are all upright. In order to maintain this image, they only have to wrap up their distress deeply.If all the wives are satisfied with their husbands’ status quo, can appreciate their husbands, worship their husbands—even if only in certain things, give men strong support and encouragement, and let them firmly believe that they are healthy and full of life. An energetic man, his wife and children are proud of him, so a man who works hard outside will definitely be inspired to forge ahead even more.Nuannuan's heart is full of the woman who gave him complete trust, and he would not bother to think about other women. Together, the family will be more harmonious and the marriage will be more stable.

As men, they are most afraid of losing their ability to be independent and have to rely on others to take care of them.And this situation is more likely to happen when the body is sick.Moreover, men worry much more about their own physical decline and weakened sexual ability than women.It is undeniable that success does bring glory and happiness to men.But as time goes by, when they get used to their status, the initial joy and excitement fade away, and when they look back on the passing years, they will feel a sense of loss.

As a wife, have you noticed that your husband has the following behaviors: he is unwilling to publicly admit his pain, troubles and stress, and always likes to hold on when things happen; , After returning home, it was also dawdling, sighing and sighing just after going to bed, tossing and turning, unable to sleep, without any tenderness from the past.

In fact, it is not difficult to change this situation, you just need to tell him seriously that you love him, are willing to support him, and will be with him no matter what he becomes.

As an upright man, as the head of the family, after listening to these words, the man's self-esteem and pride are satisfied and affirmed. Standing behind him, you understand his troubles, support him, encourage him, and make it clear Tell him honestly that you are satisfied with his performance and your current life, which is tantamount to silently calming the anxiety in his heart.How could he be dissatisfied with such a contented wife?The clouds of sorrow at home naturally dissipated.

Keep calm and calm at all times
There are nine out of ten unsatisfactory things in life.If you moan, or simply cry, every time something goes wrong, you're going to haggard in no time.

A mature woman can hold sand in her eyes and will not be brooding or angry about certain flaws in her life.They understand that what they have is definitely much more than what they don't have.Therefore, they are calm and calm towards themselves, others, and life.

Everyone's life is lacking.Instead of comparing yourself with others and looking for anger, learn to comfort yourself, buy a new dress or a new pair of shoes, go to a beauty shop for a massage, get a new hairstyle, or cook some delicious dishes for yourself.

Don't make life difficult for yourself.Especially when your husband is inconsiderate, don't put on a miserable look and wait for him to sympathize.That won't help, and the only person to be disappointed in that way is yourself.

We are not millionaires, we cannot stand poverty, so disappointment happens from time to time.For example, one day you get a small bonus and immediately want to buy a piece of clothing. Unexpectedly, after visiting large and small stores, you find to your dismay that you can’t afford everything you fancy, and you can’t afford anything you can afford. I don't like it.At this time, you will feel a kind of soreness in your heart, feeling that your youth is gone but you can't even afford a decent dress.You may take the bitterness home to pass on to your husband and children, and you will be morose and wrinkled for a few days.

do not do that.Since complaining to your husband has no effect other than making him unhappy, since you have this money in your pocket, how can you not afford to buy anything else if you can't afford clothes?Why not buy a pretty scarf or a fancy headpiece?These are the things you wish you had on a regular basis, and they also make you happy.It is much better to go home with them than to go home with sadness or resentment.You can also use the remaining money to buy a box of your favorite music CDs and some fruits that your family likes to eat.Isn't life rich all at once?
Then you think, wait until the next time you have more money to buy clothes.Tie a new scarf over an old outfit, and wear a new headpiece for an equally invigorating look.

There are many ways to comfort yourself.Close your eyes and listen to music for half an hour when you are upset, walk alone in those streets and alleys that you have never been before when you are lonely, or call a friend's phone at random to chat for a few words.

For a woman who looks at the world calmly, her inner world is rich.

Suspicion is like a bat, it always takes off at dusk

The philosopher Socrates said: "Being angry is punishing yourself with other people's mistakes." The hurt, easily brooding, waiting for an opportunity to retaliate; always look at people and things with colored glasses.In the eyes of others, such a woman is simply a harsh landlady.

Under the effect of suspicion, every word and deed of the suspected person is often cast with a suspicious color, which is the so-called "suspect creates a dark ghost".Some people have serious suspicions, and even form inertial thinking, leading to psychopathy.If a person is narrow-minded and suspicious of colleagues, friends and even family members, it will not only affect work, interpersonal relationships, and family harmony, but also affect his own mental health.

The British thinker Bacon once said: "Suspicion is like a bat. It always takes off at dusk. This kind of mood is confusing and confusing. It can make you confused, confuse friends and enemies, and destroy people. career.” Therefore, dispelling suspicion is one of the ways to maintain mental health.

Here are some suggestions for alleviating suspicion:
[-]. Rational thinking, no unreasonable suspicion

When you find yourself in doubt, instead of thinking in the direction of suspicion, ask yourself: Why am I thinking this way?What is the reason?If the suspicion is wrong, what are the other possibilities?Before making a decision, it is helpful to ask a few more reasons why to think calmly.

[-]. Discover your own strengths and enhance your self-confidence
Everyone is not perfect and has their own advantages and disadvantages.Don't just see your shortcomings and get discouraged, but discover your strengths, cultivate self-confidence and self-love, believe that you are capable, and make a good impression on others.

[-]. Enhance self-regulation ability

In the journey of life, a person will inevitably be discussed by others, so don't take it to heart.Dante has a famous saying: "Go your own way and let others say it." Be good at adjusting your mood, don't care about other people's opinions, and do whatever you want. It will evaporate.

[-]. Strengthen communication and clear up doubts
Some suspicions stem from mutual misunderstandings. If this is the case, the two should sit down and communicate through appropriate means.Through heart-to-heart talks, each other's ideas can be understood by the other party, misunderstandings can be eliminated, and conflicts caused by misunderstandings can be avoided.

In short, we must seek truth from facts and think rationally in order to be freed from the shackles of suspicion and nip suspicion in the bud.

(End of this chapter)