The Devil's Conversation Learning: Instantly Become Friends with Strangers

Chapter 11

(9) Use the product introduction method.One is the pre-frame method.When introducing products, first remove some of the resistance of customers, so that customers can listen to your introduction carefully from the very beginning.The second is hypothetical question syntax.Ask the customer about the final benefit or final effect of the product in the form of a question.As long as you can verify the benefits of your product, the deal will be closed.The third is the descending introduction method.Introduce all possible benefits of the product to customers step by step, introduce the most important ones first, and introduce the unimportant ones later, so that customers are attracted from the beginning.The fourth is to find out the interests of customers.Itemize the benefits of your product and carefully observe the customer's reaction.The fifth is the interactive introduction method.Keep your customers in a positive, interactive, and engaged state of mind.You can't let customers be spectators, you must mobilize customers' tactile, visual, and auditory sensory systems in a timely manner, and you must constantly ask customers some questions.The sixth is the visual selling method.Allow customers to visually imagine the scene of buying your product.The seventh is the hypothetical transaction method.Make customers more and more interested in your products.

07. With the power of praise, striking up a conversation can also make people happy
Compliments are a low-cost, high-return magic weapon for interpersonal communication.Praising others is like using a torch to illuminate other people's lives and also illuminate one's own heart. It helps to carry forward the virtues of the person being praised and promote the healthy development of mutual friendship. It can also eliminate interpersonal discord and resentment. "A good word keeps warm in winter".Praise is a great art and has an incredible power.

Compliments are a good thing, but never easy.In the process of striking up a conversation with others, if you do not master certain praise principles, praise skills and praise words when complimenting others, good things will turn into bad things.Only appropriate and timely compliments can make the compliment play its greatest role and make strike-ups more effective.

First, the principle of praise is mainly timely and moderate
One is the principle of timely.It is very important to carefully grasp the timing in striking up a conversation, and to praise just right.First of all, when you find that the other party has something worthy of praise during the chat, you should praise it boldly in time, and don't miss the opportunity.Secondly, when you learn about the success of others, sending a compliment is like icing on the cake, and its value can be "worth ten thousand gold".Such as getting good grades in exams, being advanced in evaluations, receiving rewards, etc. At this time, people feel very comfortable. If they can hear a sincere compliment, one can imagine their joy.

The second is the principle of moderation.Moderation is to master the scale of praise, because it directly affects the effect of praise.Appropriate, point-to-point compliments are real compliments.Therefore, the words of praise cannot be abused. Once the praise becomes excessive, the praiser will not only fail to reap the smile of successful communication, but will swallow the bitter fruit of being placed in an embarrassing situation.As the saying goes, "too much is not enough".

Second, to praise others requires certain skills

When striking up a conversation, the mastery and application of praise skills are even more important.Generally speaking, praise has the following skills.

One is to find praise points.It is very important to learn to look for points of praise.Only by finding the appropriate and shining compliments of the other party can the compliments appear sincere and not hypocritical.We have many friends and want to praise others very much, but we can't find the point of praise.Everyone has a lot of shining points, but we must have a pair of eyes that are good at discovering.In fact, the shining points of a person worthy of praise exist in many aspects.There are external, specific things, such as clothing (wearing, tie, watch, glasses, shoes, etc.), hair, body, skin, eyes, eyebrows, etc.This part can be called hardware.There are internal and abstract things, such as character, style, temperament, education, experience, tolerance, mind, hobbies, specialties, things to do, ability to deal with problems, and so on.This part can be called software.There are also indirect and related ones, such as hometown, work unit, neighbors, friends, occupation, items used, pets raised, subordinate employees, relatives, etc.This part can be called an attachment.In short, there are too many compliments on a person. Generally speaking, software is better than hardware, and accessories are better, because accessories are indirect compliments.

Second, it varies from person to person.People's quality is divided into high and low, age is different, and it varies from person to person, highlighting individuality, and characteristic praise can receive better results than general praise.The elderly always hope that others will not forget his achievements and glory of "remembering the past". When talking with him, he can praise his proud past more; He also cited several examples to prove that he can indeed have a bright future; for business people, he can be praised for his agility and ability to make money; Knowledgeable, quiet and indifferent... Of course, all of these must be based on facts and must not be exaggerated.

The third is sincerity.Although people like to hear compliments, not any compliment can make the other person happy.Compliments should come from the heart and be sincere, so as to be attractive.First of all, the content of praise should be what the other party has and is real, not something out of nothing, let alone take other people's flaws and inadequacies as the object of praise.The only things that can arouse the other party's favor are those based on facts and compliments from the heart.On the contrary, if you praise others hypocritically and without roots, he will not only feel puzzled, but also think you are slick, deceitful and hypocritical.For example, when you see an unattractive lady, but you want to say to her: "You are so beautiful." The other party will immediately believe that what you said is hypocritical and against your will.But if you focus on her clothing, speech, and manners, and find her excellence in these aspects and sincerely praise her, she will be happy to accept it.Secondly, praise should really come from the heart and be sincere.Sincere praise will not only make the person being praised psychologically happy, but also enable you to often discover the advantages of others, so that you can have an optimistic and appreciative attitude towards life.Insincere praise is undoubtedly a kind of flattery, which will eventually be seen through by others, and can only attract disgust and spurn from others.

The fourth is detailed and specific.In everyday life, there are not many times when people have very significant achievements.Therefore, in communication, we should start with specific events, be good at discovering even the slightest strengths of others, and praise them without losing the opportunity.The more detailed and specific the words of praise, the more you know the other person, and the more you value his strengths and achievements.Let the other party feel your sincerity, kindness and credibility, and the interpersonal distance between you will get closer and closer.If you just praise the other party vaguely, saying some empty and floating words such as "You have done a great job" or "You are an excellent leader", it will not only arouse the other party's speculation, but may even cause unnecessary misunderstandings and conflicts. Crisis of Confidence.

Third, the words of praise are the substantive content of praise

If your words of praise can't bring joy to the other party, then it is a failed compliment, and even make it impossible to continue the conversation.Therefore, in the process of striking up a conversation, we must pay more attention to the words of praise.Generally speaking, the words of praise when striking up a conversation include the following:
One is to be good at finding the real shining point of the other party, to be realistic and sincere.

The second is to increase the price of every item, and reduce the age when you meet someone.This is the essentials of communicative praise.

The third is that strangers look at characteristics, and acquaintances look at changes.When we meet for the first time, we need to look for his distinctive features, and when we meet for the second time, we need to look for the changes that have taken place in him.

The fourth is to send compliments as soon as possible.Compliments are valid and expired.

The fifth is to praise what the other party is most proud of but others don't think so.It is very important to make the other party feel recognized.

The sixth is to send praise immediately when the other party succeeds.

Seven is to praise everything you want the other person to do.General leaders often use this method with their subordinates.If you want the other person to be patient, and you praise the other person for being a patient person, the other person really becomes very patient.

Eight is to praise others behind the scenes, the effect is better.It's a pity that many of us like to speak ill of people behind their backs.This is the trick of a real master of life.

The ninth is to use a third party to praise, and the other party is easy to accept.The third party's praise is indirect praise, which avoids the flattering feeling of direct praise, and the effect is very good.Moisten things silently.Such as: "Listen to someone, you are a top sales expert." "Listen to your boss, you performed very well last year." "Listen to your employees, you raised your salary and went on a trip last year."

In short, if you want to praise the other party in the process of striking up a conversation, you must follow the principle of praise, pay attention to the skills of praise, and use the words of praise.Only in this way can you truly please the other party and yourself, which will help to continue the conversation and make the chat between the two parties more enjoyable.

Further Reading: Don't Praise the Wrong Way

(1) Don't act like you want others.If we compliment a person and act as if we are asking him for help, others will think you are insincere.

(2) Don't give the same compliment to more than one person.Everyone wants to be different, to be special than others.There is no one who does not think that he is a special case of life, the world is centered on his own position, and he is the special case outside the law.Therefore, when treating different people at the same time, you must remember to choose different compliments.

(3) Don't make people feel that your praise is sympathizing with others.Compassion is seen as a grace and a blessing only by the weak, but pity and disgrace by the strong.

(4) Don't give false praise.The purpose of praise is to bring happiness, confidence, and friendship to people, not to let people use it as a tool for scolding.Compliments in form and derogation are worse than swearing, which not only hurts self-esteem, but also only stimulates conflicts and deepens hatred.

(5) Don't stop talking.Some limit words are often used when praising a person, "such as you are the greatest", "you are the smartest", "you are the kindest", if you remove the word "most", others may still believe it, if you bring this Words, no one can believe that they are number one in the world.

(6) Don't praise and reprimand at the same time.In fact, this model is a negative model. In communication, it can only bring negation, accusation and harm to others.Although there is affirmation in the front, because the negation in the back completely dilutes the affirmation in the front, the result will only accelerate the estrangement between the two parties.

(7) Don't let the language of praise be interrupted.There will be embarrassment in the cold, and so will praise.Wouldn't it be embarrassing if you stopped talking after complimenting the other person and stopped talking suddenly, and you looked at me and I looked at you, staring at you?

(8) Don't praise the high-ranking ones too much for the low-ranking ones.If you want to communicate effectively, you must first define your own identity, and what identity you can say.Any words that don't fit the identity will not have much effect, and they will even be humiliated.

(9) Don't just praise what he obviously does well, but what he wants to do better.When we praise what he wants to do, it is much better than what he is obviously good at, because many people have already affirmed his excellent past.Relatively speaking, for the results he has not obtained so far, our praise is more of an encouragement and support for him.

08. Efficient strike up a conversation, polite and self-cultivation to add points
In the process of striking up a conversation, some people are very attractive to others, and people are willing to strike up a conversation with him; some people lack this attraction, and people are unwilling to strike up a conversation with him.Some people have established a high prestige in the eyes of others by striking up a conversation, and people trust and admire them very much; some people have low prestige in the eyes of others, and people despise him.All of these are caused by many factors, but a person's politeness plays a vital role.A person's politeness mainly depends on whether he can follow some basic social norms. In addition, clothing, speech and behavior also reflect a person's quality to a certain extent.

Politeness is not learned overnight, but gradually formed in a long-term life; politeness is not a deliberate imitation, it is manifested in your daily communication inadvertently.If you want to be polite in social life and make yourself popular, you should abide by the following basic rules, and pay attention to your clothes and manners.

First, abide by public morality

(End of this chapter)