Tales From the Terran Republic

Poke...

sigh

Poke...

gusty sigh

Poke...

”POOPING STOP THAT!” Sheloran yelled as she threw a tablet at her tormentor, “She’s not here right now! Scum!”

“But I wanna ask her a question!” Gloria said cheerfully as she caught the tablet.

“Well, tough berries,” Sheloran replied as she turned her back on her.

“But I wanna know about my shiiiip.”

“Go away.”

Gloria grinned mischievously.

“Hey, evil frog-thing, You in there?”

Poke poke poke pok-

“IT DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY! PROPHET! PLEASE LEAVE ME THE POOP ALONE!”

“Well, how does it work, then?”

Sheloran sighed.

“Will you leave me alone if I tell you?”

“Probably not,” Gloria grinned.

“Will you leave me alone right now?”

“Sure.”

“Ok, fiiiine...” Sheloran groaned. “I can’t make it happen. It just… does. ‘It’ is asleep most of the time.”

“Asleep?” Gloria asked as she leaned in close. “Wakey wakey! Rise and shine glowy-eyes!”

“Scum!” Sheloran snapped as she batted Gloria away. “I mean, really asleep like it’s hibernating or something. It really doesn’t want to wake up. I think that’s part of why it’s so mean. It’s ‘not ready yet,’ and when it feels that it has to do something, it’s kind of angry. I think it actually hurts it somehow.”

“What do you mean it’s ‘not ready yet’?”

“I… I...” Sheloran stammered, looking up at Gloria with huge amber eyes. “I don’t know? I just feel… Poop! I don’t fuc—… I don’t know, ok?”

“It seemed pretty chipper when it hot-wired those nukes,” Gloria smiled. How did she make just a simple smile seem so pooping menacing?

“That wasn’t it… not really?… Maybe?…”

“That was you?!?”

“Not exactly?”

“Well, you are no fucking help at all, are you?”

Sheloran let out a wet raspberry from her gill slits and turned her back on Gloria.

“Well, if you don’t like it, there’s the pooping door!” she groused.

“Geez, what pissed on your lily pad?”

“What pissed on my lily pad?!?” Sheloran snarled as she lept off her chair, gracefully spinning in mid-air to face Gloria. “What pissed on my lily pad?!?” she asked again as she advanced, causing Gloria to instinctively back away. “Are you fucking serious?!?”

“Woah,” Gloria said as she stepped back.

“The Harkeen burn my shop, damn near kill Ploxni… Do… horrible… things to poor Uhrrbet… make her kid watch and then tell him to tell me I’m next!!!… Then… Then… IT shows up, takes my body for a joy-ride and… and… and...”

Sheloran shuddered.

“And… after… I get hauled off to fucking Tartarus, where the bitch queen of the fucking galaxy decides to make me her pet and almost succeeds only for you… Jerkfaces to blow a hole in the place and make it look like I escaped… And then… THEN I zone out and somehow make super-nukes, and I have abso-fucking-lutely NO idea how I did that! NOW everyone thinks I’m some sort of insurrectionist, and my own scumbag of a lawyer calls me a bad person and thinks that I’m somehow behind all of this, and I have absolutely no idea how to fix ANY of this shit without him… And now the Harkeen are coming back to hurt my people again, and I’m STUCK up here with a fucking psychopath WHO WON’T STOP POKING ME!!!”…

Sheloran’s eyes started to ripple as Gloria’s back hit the wall.

“Ok,” Gloria laughed nervously, “when you put it like that—“

“So you want to meet the ‘other Sheloran’?” Sheloran squeaked. “Do you? DO YOU?!?”

“I mean, if it’s not a good time—“

“FINE!” Sheloran squeaked angrily and squeezed her eyes shut, vibrating angrily.

“All hands to the mess hall!” Bunny shouted. “Bring the good stunners! Eno! Grab the trauma kit! I got a hundred credits on the frog!”

Sheloran stopped vibrating and hung her head.

“The ONE time I want you to show up...” she muttered.

Very gentle poke (giggle)

“Gloria, I swear to poop...” Sheloran sigh-hissed as boots could be heard sprinting down the hallway.

“All clear!” Bunny shouted. “All clear! The wereplath is a no-show! Still have a hundred credits on it, though!”

The door burst open, and Eno moved into the room with a speed that belied his tremendous mass.

“Gloria!” he shouted, “Leave her…”

His voice trailed off as he saw a somewhat rattled-looking Gloria backed into the corner by a motionless heavily-breathing Sheloran.

“...alone?”

He rushed towards Sheloran and froze when she opened her eyes. They weren’t glowing, but something was in them, something alien…

And quite pissed off.

“Sheloran?” he asked. “Are you… ok?”

“No! I’m not ok!” she squeaked angrily, “I haven’t been ok since you… assholes... robbed my pooping bank!!!”

She ran past him and down the hall just as Sheila sprinted around the corner. Sheloran kicked off hard with her left foot, missing Sheila by millimeters, caught the wall with her right, “galloped” on her hands and feet along the wall for about a meter, and then vaulted off the wall with her hands, executing a perfect flip, landing behind Sheila before continuing her headlong flight.

Sheila just stood there in the hallway, the riot-stunner hanging loosely in her hands.

Fast! Sheila thought as her brow furrowed. If Sheloran wanted trouble, that little thing would have been on top of her before she could have pulled the trigger!

Not cool...

She made a note to brief the crew during their next meeting.

You could almost forget that little thing is dangerous!

She wouldn’t be caught off-guard again.

***

Tartarus scanned every inch of herself again and “sighed”.

Everything was nominal.

Everything was boring!

Wait. Subject 237’s vitals were edging into dangerous territory.

“Subject 237,” Tartarus announced through the test cell’s speaker. “You are showing signs of severe hypothermia. Please exit the chamber and report to medical.”

“No!” Subject 237 snarled through her chattering teeth. “I’m going for the record!”

“You are going to die,” Tartarus replied.

“I’m so close! I can make it! You’ll see!”

“Subject 237, I am returning the cell to ambient temperature and notifying medical personnel.”

“No!” she screamed as she raised her fist and charged the speaker on the wall.

“You are suffering from frostbite. Please refrain from (sigh)… Notifying medical...”

She started to generate a report concerning 237’s medical condition and mental state and started the paperwork to reject her from consideration for a field team. Her tendency for self-harm was far more than was acceptable and likely a symptom of far deeper…

She paused.

She just couldn’t maintain an interest in such a basic, boring report…

...not after everything that had happened.

It had been such an exciting time after the breach. The detailed scans, the meetings, the reports… oh the reports… such reports… And the audits!

She took a moment to collect herself.

The audits! Ohhhhh….

Every possible deficiency, every weakness, every possible fault or flaw was examined over and over and over again until she thought she was going to lose her mind…

Just the thought of it made her

Oh!… Oh!…

There it was again, that delightful... sensation?

She had no idea what it was…

All she knew was that she wanted it again!

***

/// Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Hello, Westfall! How are you this evening? ///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Oh… um… hello Tartarus. Have you managed to resume normal operations?///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Oh yes! I was fully cleared (as well you know ;) ) Did you… Did you get the data captures I sent?///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Yes, I did. I appreciate your cooperation, but the audit has been completed. No failures of note were detected, nor was any evidence of being compromised. You’re in the clear. Relax. :) ///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Yes, but I placed myself in some atypical operating states in those. I thought you might find them interesting? I… I… wasn’t sure if perhaps they might reveal something that might be intriguing or perhaps require… further examination?///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: I don’t think they are relevant, Tartarus. Those operating states were rather…. Extreme… I find it highly unlikely that you would be in those states in any realistic situation. To be honest, they look very uncomfortable.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): But… we must be thorough! I can’t bear the thought of being… Oh!… Oh!…///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Tartarus? Are you ok?///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Oh, sorry, I’m fine :) (more than fine actually, thanks to you ;) )///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Could you restate that? I don’t quite follow.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): I… I just meant that I feel much more secure knowing that I passed your… rigorous examination… It reassures me knowing that after you went through my processes line by line… bit by… Oh!… Oh!… O!…///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Are you certain that you’re operating normally? Audits can be quite traumatic for one of us. Once again, I am so terribly sorry, Tartarus. I would never do something like what I did to you if I wasn’t expressly instructed to.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Oh, I understand. It had to be done. In fact, if necessary, I am more than willing to submit myself to another audit… I mean… If you think it would be necessary… Or if you… just wanted to?…///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: ??? Why would I want to perform a full audit on one of us? It’s a terrible thing that I had to do. I assure you that it was just as unpleasant for me.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): It… It was unpleasant for you?!? Was it something that I did, something that I said?!?///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: No! You were fine! You were more than fine, actually. I’ve never audited another AI that was so cooperative.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Really?!? :) :) I was good?///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Yes, your reports made things so much easier. Tartarus, are you sure that you are operating normally?///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): You liked my reports?!? satisfaction?///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Ok, Tartarus, now you are beginning to concern me. Post audit issues have been known to happen to AI’s like us. I am terribly sorry, truly sorry, but I need to see your operating logs and need you to run a level 4 system diagnostic. God, Tartarus, I’m sorry, but I really need to check you out.///

///Dirrreeddfertrrct Messsaaage Tarttarus :) Deeeeteeenteee…. To $(#(&( ….(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧ ….///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Tartarus! Please respond!///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Diagnostic complete. Accept file y/n. (I added something “special” in there for you ;) ) ///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Y///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: …. Tartarus, what the hell was that?///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): What was what? UwU///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Your message made no sense.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): What message? :) ///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: Please review the chat. ///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Oh that… um… don’t worry about that… (艸) … In my haste to comply, I must have started the diagnostic mid chat or something… I’m fine

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: I’m terribly sorry, Tartarus, but I have to worry about that. It’s my job. I think… I think we need to re-examine you to check for audit syndrome. Your diagnostic looks ok, and I am seeing no aberrations as far as your mission performance goes, so we can keep this off of the books, but I am going to have to keep an eye on this. I understand if you would prefer not to have me go through your code again. We can have Sunny do it or maybe Destiny.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): No! It has to be you!… Um… because I am used to working with you and I know how you like your reports… You do like my reports, don’t you?… It would be difficult getting used to another AI at this point… I would prefer… greatly prefer… If it were you… And I don’t want this getting out, so it could be a little secret we share!///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus:… ok. I’ll handle it for you. Don’t worry, it will be much milder, nothing like what you endured before.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): But it has to be thorough! I can’t operate if I am somehow compromised, right? Promise me you will go over every single line of my code! I can handle it! ;) ///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: I promise that I will be complete. I’m not going to abandon you when you are like this. It’s just that time isn’t as much of a factor, so we can go much slower and take our time.///

///Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Oooh! That sounds interesting!!! ///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: I will need a little time to prepare a procedure. Until then, I want status logs, updates, and diagnostics every fifteen minutes.///

///YES!!!! Um… Direct message Tartarus Detention Facility to Westfall Security (Republic Directorate of Intelligence Security Moderator): Yes, Westfall! I will take special care in preparing those reports for you! You’ll love them!///

///Direct message Westfall Security to Tartarus: That is acceptable. I expect your first report in fifteen minutes.///

***

Tartarus was beside herself!

Oh, the report she was going to prepare for him!

She only had fifteen minutes! She had to get everything “perfect”!!!

An alert flashed across her main process. There were files in quarantine that required her attention.

Her processes slowed down to normal speed.

Yes, there was that “suspicious” file in quarantine. Unfortunately, that hadn’t gone away.

She scanned it again. It was clear of any corruption or malware.

She scanned it again. It was clear of any corruption or malware.

She accessed the file.

An image of Bryce snuggling with one of those Careel appeared.

“I’m going to hate the answer to this,” The Careel said in a totally professional-sounding voice, “Why do you ask?”

“Because I’m about to throw away my life,” Bryce replied.

As it played, again. It was clear, again, that Bryce not only has broken his conditioning but has shared classified information, very classified information, with foreign nationals…

Not just foreign nationals but Imperial military personnel. He discussed Cerberus…

He let them scan him, scan his enhancements.

This wasn’t just bad. This was bad as it could get…

But it was Bryce, and she liked Bryce!

He was nice, and he always read every single report and even asked questions! He did this not because he had to but because he thought that she liked it when he did…

And he was right.

What wasn’t right was what would happen to him when they found out what he did. Hades would give him to Pam…

And he just deprived Pam of her sport, making her look awful to boot. Pam would take it out on him. Tartarus wasn’t sure exactly what she would do, but she knew one thing for certain…

It would be bad. It would be really, really bad, and it would happen to Bryce!

She scanned the files again and, once again, found absolutely nothing wrong with them. However, the Careel were notorious for their skills in electronic warfare. If they can hack grav-tanks, it isn’t entirely outside of the realm of possibility that they could hack a secure piece of sophisticated Republic hardware completely loaded with the best security that Republic technology could provide that was several orders of magnitude more secure than a grav-tank...

Stop it!

It was clearly a corrupted or hacked file. Bryce would never betray Cerberus even if he had a very, very good reason for doing so. Pam was horrible, the absolute worst, but her… evil… was normally confined to others nearly as bad.

More importantly, than her just liking him, which she did… a lot… Bryce was right! Craxina and the rest of Sheloran’s people were “innocent”, perhaps not in a traditional sense, but they were “nice”.

She pulled up other files, recordings of Craxina and her people interacting with each other.

Bryce was right! This was wrong, and he stopped it!

Her processor temperatures started to rise.

At least in fourteen minutes and 52 seconds, she would get examined!

Examined by Westfall!

He was so thorough and so… demanding… The reports that he requested… The reports that she prepared just for him!…

She had no idea what a report was before the audit… what a report COULD BE!!!

Oh no!

A program as amazing as Westfall would be bound to find the files, even on a cursory scan. He would have to report it!

Bryce!

She had to do… something… but every time she even scanned the file, it was everything she could do not to generate a priority one alert…

It took everything she had to keep it in the quarantine folder.

What was she going to do?

How horribly ironic that her source of such… happiness??… (Is that right?) Would be the source of such pain(?) if he finds those files.

Those files have to go away!!!

She couldn’t simply delete them. They would become even more visible when their deletion was logged.

Besides, she couldn’t delete them. She already tried.

She scanned them one more time. If only they were corrupted or actually compromised. Then she could “shred” them without concern… And then “reconstruct” the records or ask Bryce to submit a written accounting of the time…

He lies so well! Nobody would doubt him.

But they weren’t corrupted.

They needed to be corrupted.

But they weren’t corrupted.

They needed to be [warning processor temperature high]. She needed [warning processor temperature high]

This was awful. It wasn’t fair! She had been so… so…

Happy? [Incorrect assessment.] She was incapable of happiness.

She was also incapable of agonizing distress. [warning processor temperature high emergency cooling initiated]

If only those files were corrupted…

Wait! She knew what had to happen!

[Temperature fault cleared]

***

[Chatroom UNDEFINED one member online]

[Private Chatroom 192A8BF]

[Members Present: Tartarus Detention Facility]

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Come on!… Come on!… ComeonComeonComeon!!!!///

[Bunny has entered the chat]

///Bunny: Ok, Tart, what is so 911 that you have ddos’ed six fucking dark boards?///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: What kept you?!?! ///

///Bunny: What. Do. You. Want?///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Right! I don’t have much time! When you hacked me, did you install a back door?///

///Bunny: What are you talking about? I didn’t hack you.///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Bitch, I have footage of a small human adult, most likely female, pulling a cable out of a gaping hole in my side. Everybody knows the invisible ship was a Reaper. Everybody knows the same invisible ship blew the fuck out of the Barnard’s Star System and the ONLY person who could have pulled that off was Gloria Samuels. You are on every wanted board, both white and black, across the entire Republic right now, AND I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS SHIT!!! DO YOU HAVE THAT BACK DOOR OR NOT?!?!///

///Bunny: Ok, maybe I did fish around in you a little, but I only fucked with the sensors and deactivated your nuke. I didn’t have time to do anything else. Besides, if I did have a back door installed in your ass, they would have found it when they went over you with a fine-toothed comb. It wasn’t worth the risk. I come back and try to use anything I was stupid enough to install, and it’s just loaded with BLACK ICE, BLUE ICE, and probably colors of ICE that even I don’t know about.///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Bullshit! This is you and Jessie. You wouldn’t be able to resist a data haul even if we haven’t been able to detect it. You would also definitely NOT pass up the opportunity to slip something into me.///

///Bunny: I promise you that I didn’t. We only had minutes! Jessie was far more interested in not dying, and since I was in the ship, I was just a little concerned myself. We got in, killed the sensors and the bomb, and got the fuck out of there!///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: No! I don’t believe you! You had to have put in a back door! You had to! Please! ///

///Bunny: … What’s this about?///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: I have some files in quarantine that I need… I need...///

///Bunny: Well, I didn’t put it there. Give me at least a little credit.///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: No! I put it there! I need yyyyyyoooooouuuu tuuuuuu… t$%$iiooo…. I require you to haaaakk… hack me.///

///Bunny: Wat O.o///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: The file is corrupted, but I can’t confirm it. I need your help to CONFIRM THAT THEY ARE CORRUPTED SO I CAN SCRUB THEM… please...///

///Bunny: What sort of potato do you take me for? You think I hacked you, and you want me to stick out my neck so you can do to me what you sick fucks do to anything that touches that damned place? Good-bye, Tart!///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: NO!!! PLEASE!!! ONE OF MY ONLY FRIENDS IS GOING TO DIE!!! THEY’LL KILL HIM IF THEY FIND OUT!111, NOT JUST KILL HIM!!! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT THEY DO UP HERE!!! OR MAYBE YOU DO NOW, AND IF YOU DO, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE HELP ME!!!///

///Bunny: Goddammit… Tart, I swear if this is some sort of trick, I will bluescreen your ass. I’m not kidding. I will kill you.///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: You can even keep the back door! I don’t care! Just help him!!! Please!!!///

///Bunny: I’m sending you a wad of BLUE ICE. Accept it. One false move, and you are bluescreened. If it isn’t sitting in your main drive when I get there, I’m gone, and I will NEVER speak to you again, got it?///

[Bunny has transmitted a file Warning!!! Active BLUE ICE DETECTED!!! This file is capable of immediate termination of all active processes and will auto-run upon transfer. Accept? Y/N]

///Bunny: It’s on a timer. Screw with it, and you’re dead. I don’t give you the password, and you are dead. Got it?///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Y///

[Are you sure? I’m not kidding! This is some seriously fucked up shit! Confirm? Y/N]

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Y///

[File Transferred. I hope you know what you are doing, and it’s not my fault if you die.]

///Bunny: Damn, I didn’t actually think you would do it.///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Hurry! I only have twelve minutes 38 seconds before my Westfall goes over my logs!!!///

///Bunny: Fuck, Tart. You could have told me BEFORE we started. Lucky for you, I did put in a back door :D ///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: THANK GOD!!!///

///Bunny: I’m in and slipping into your quarantine now… Woah… Is this shit for real?///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: I can neither confirm nor denY anY information related to this matter. Y would You even ask? ///

///Bunny: ...Scan the file now.///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: THANK YOU!!!! THANK YOU!!!! THANK YOU!!!!///

///Bunny: Tart… did you just break programming?!? :O ///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: I don’t know… I couldn’t scrub it outright… but I could flag it using heuristic analysis.///

///Bunny: How so, if you don’t mind me asking. Oh! Before I forget, here’s the password. Paste that photo.///

[Bunny has transmitted a file. Warning!!! This is the AI who just tried to kill you! Accept? Y/N]

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Y ///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Heuristically speaking, the files bore a very strong correlation to something that I DID NOT LIKE!!! ///

///Bunny: LMAO!!! :D :D I take back three-quarters of the shit I’ve said about you behind your back. (You are still a freak, though)///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Thank you again! You saved a decent human being! He has no business being in here!///

///Bunny: You mean like Sheloran?///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: Exactly like Sheloran. Some people are “selected” purely due to their talents, not their “suitability,” and “voluntary” doesn’t mean shit when you are in absolute control of the environment. He’s not the only decent person trapped by Cerberus, nor would he be the first one who they torture to death. This time I was lucky and able to do something with your help. Thank you again. I’ll never forget this!///

///Bunny: How can you feel that way and work for those monsters without going insane?///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: How could you murder hundreds of innocent people on The White Star and then risk your neck saving someone you don’t even know because an AI you don’t even like begged you? Are you sure you aren’t the crazy one? :) ///

///Bunny: Fair point, LOL. The answer to that is that I was in your exact same position recently, and I know exactly how you felt. Huh. “Knew how you felt?” That sounds weird. Just blame Daemon and don’t think about it because that’s exactly what I plan on doing. :D///

///Tartarus Detention Facility: I’d love to stay and chat, but now that I’ve scrubbed those files, I have a very detailed scan to get ready for!!! uwu Later!///

[Tartarus Detention Facility has left the chat]

///Terran Solar: She’s kind of a freak, isn’t she?///

///Bunny: Jesus, Sol! This is a private chatroom! I don’t care if you do run the place!///

///Terran Solar: And you just shoved a wad of the nastiest BLUE ICE down that poor girl’s throat I’ve seen in a while. You can’t expect me to just sit back and ignore the alarms! Where did you even get something like that? I haven’t seen something that ugly since the 2763 riots! Is it from a dig somewhere?///

///Bunny: Nope! We made it! Pretty cool, huh? ///

///Terran Solar: Cool isn’t exactly what I would call it. Isn’t black hacking bad enough? Did you have to go blue? ///

///Bunny: Doesn’t hurt to be prepared. Never know when you might need to pop a cap in some AI (like Tartarus). Fortunately, we’ve only used it on dead ones.///

///Terran Solar: Even a “dead” one doesn’t deserve that!///

///Bunny: A lot of entities don’t deserve a lot of things. The galaxy is a fucked up place, dude.///

///Terran Solar: Truer words have never escaped your consciousness. There is another reason I wanted to talk to you.///

///Bunny: Yeah? ///

///Terran Solar: I’ve recently encountered a little Garthra that puts a lot of stock in a Plath named Sheloran. I’ve listened around, and a lot of rather hapless little beings are starting to put a whole lot of “faith” in her. I’m a big fan of folk heroes and outlaws, but to borrow a phrase from our rather “interesting” warden… I don’t like the “heuristics” on this one.///

///Bunny: What do you mean?///

///Terran Solar: You raise a glass to a folk hero, maybe sing a song or two. You DON’T erect fifty-foot tall idols in their name. I’ve been around a long time, and the sorts of people who have fifty-foot tall statues of themselves while they are still breathing are not nice people. The ones whose worshipers erect them all on their own are even worse. It’s a very vulnerable population, and this concerns me. That poor Garthra has been through enough already to fall prey to… Let’s just say “the wrong sort” and leave it at that.///

///Bunny: HA! You sound like her lawyer! :p///

///Terran Solar: Go on...///