how far is Forever

Chapter 10

The power of rumors has always been terrible, maybe it is not true, but people always have the ability to spread it to be true.Mom must have been more stimulated this time to be like this. It's no wonder that any woman likes to help her husband raise an illegitimate child.

Dad sighed: "Don't make trouble, things are not what you think."

"What does that look like, tell me!"

"Luo Yan is not my son..."

No?

Dad's momentary pause, I widened my eyes in surprise, how is this possible?

Dad continued: "His biological mother passed away due to dystocia, and Luo Yan lived with his father after that, and you know his father, he is a colleague of mine, Li Zhize."

"He?" Mom asked, "Isn't he dead?"

Dad was silent, maybe because he didn't know how to tell his mother about it.

After a long time, he sighed and said, "Yes, he is dead, but his death..."

"what is the problem?"

"You also know that year, the company ran out of public funds, and all the blame was pointed at Luo Yan's father. I was an accountant at the time, and I knew that this matter had nothing to do with him, and it was done by another person. But the manager told me , As long as I pretend I don’t know anything, I’m fine. They won’t do anything to Luo Yan’s father. We’ve been colleagues for many years. But when I went back to the company to pick up things at night, I heard that the manager and the money-loser Said that everything has been pushed to Luo Yan's father, and he is leak-proof, and he will definitely be sentenced and let him be the scapegoat. My legs are weak and I don't know what to do. I hesitated for a while, and when I finally got the courage to fight I got the news of Luo Yan's death when I called Luo Yan's father for the truth and called the police. He left a suicide note saying that he was framed and didn't want his family to bear huge debts, so he had to leave. Although his death had nothing to do with me directly , but... this is all my fault, if I start to understand the situation clearly, if I stand up and say everything, maybe nothing like this will happen. Luo Yan was greatly stimulated and lost his eight-year-old Memory, I felt guilty, so I asked someone to help with the adoption procedures and brought him to our home. Over the years, I have never been truly happy for a moment, and I am always afraid that Luo Yan will know, know all this, and then hate us. See She and Ruoruo have such a good relationship, I really..."

Mom asked, "Then why haven't you told me?"

"I don't want you to know that you have a cowardly husband who made a big mistake, and I don't want Ruoruo to be ashamed of it...I, I'm sorry for you..."

At that moment, I felt a chill all over my body.My father was silent, my mother didn't speak, and I didn't know what mood to think about this matter.

Probably because he sensed that something was wrong with the door, Dad suddenly opened the door, and I was startled standing in front of the door, and Dad was obviously also surprised when he saw me.

"You come in first."

I nodded awkwardly, walked in, and saw my mother sitting on the sofa with her head lowered, unable to see her expression, and the ground was a mess.

After my father came in, he asked me to sit next to my mother. He closed the door behind his back, and I sat down slowly. My eyes scanned all the places I could see, and my lips trembled slightly. Luo Yan's days together are rumbling in his head.

Dad looked at me fixedly, he lit a cigarette, took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, I don't know what he was thinking.

"Dad..." I called him softly.

My father exhaled a round of smoke rings, and the pungent smell made me frown. After a while, my father asked, "How much did you hear just now?"

My breathing became short unconsciously, thinking about every word my father said just now, my thoughts suddenly went blank, and an indescribable tremor spread in my blood.

"Joruo."

Dad called me again, and I was relieved, hesitated for a while and said, "All."

There was a weird silence in the living room again, Dad didn't speak any more, I didn't know how to break the deadlock, I mechanically looked at Mom, then at Dad.

After a long time, my mother suddenly held my hand, which was icy cold.

"Ruo Ruo, promise mom one thing." She looked at me, the light in her eyes flickering, "You have to pretend that you don't know about this matter, and don't tell your brother, let alone anyone else. "

My mother held my hand tightly, and I even felt a burst of pain. My mother told me: "You have to keep this secret for the sake of this family and your father."

I turned my head and looked at my father. He was looking down at the red light on the cigarette butt, and he didn't speak.In fact, I know very well that in order to support Su Luoyan and me to study these years, he has been working almost desperately, and his hair has turned gray a lot. Anyone who sees it will feel a kind of sadness.

The living room was quiet.

I closed my eyes, then opened them again, as if I fell into a bottomless abyss again: "I will never say it, and I will treat Su Luoyan as my own brother, and I will never say it in my life!"

My mother hugged me tightly, and my body trembled. I knew she was crying. She was really tired after all these years, and my chest was in severe pain like a knife, but I couldn’t cry, and my mind went blank. .

The memory of that day was fixed in this moment by me, and I will never forget it...

Mom and Dad had dinner at home for two days on the weekend, but Su Luoyan still didn't come back, and the house was more silent than ever before.My mother asked me why Su Luoyan came home less and less often after I was in college?
I thought about it, but actually I didn't know, so I just said, "He has a girlfriend."

Mom nodded: "When I met Luo Yan at school, I told him to take my girlfriend home for dinner."

I nodded silently, but didn't write it down.

On Sunday evening, I walked out of the house.

The setting sun was about to set, I squinted my eyes, obviously only two days, but seemed to have passed for many years, I sighed and prepared to go back to school.

But at the gate of the community, I saw Song Junmu.The afterglow of the setting sun was still flowing in the air, he put his hands in his trouser pockets, looked at me and smiled: "Ruo Ruo, I will pick you up to school today."

I blinked my eyes slightly. During this period of contact, I found that Song Junmu is really a very good person, and Jiang Chuan really has some prejudice against him.But now, I can't raise the interest to chat and laugh with him. I just greet him in a calm tone and politely, which feels unnatural.

He's really a good boyfriend and I'm a terrible girlfriend.

Song Junmu walked towards me, and the setting sun shone on his body, just like a soft light lens in a movie, with a white shimmer all over his body.

Until he came to my eyes, I looked up at him.Song Junmu seems to be very used to holding my hand, but this time, I subconsciously took a step back and wiped his fingertips, just the fingertips, very light, almost no tactile sensation!
Time paused for an instant.

I asked, "Why are you here?" I tried to look nonchalant, but after I said it, I realized that he had already mentioned this question just now.

I feel a little regretful, but I don't know how to take back that stupid sentence.Song Junmu was in front of me, just blocking the sun, only the outline was reflected by the golden border, and his face could not be seen clearly.He said, "I send you to school to fulfill my obligations as a boyfriend."

I nodded, and the leaves "rustled" with the breeze.

Song Junmu smiled, and took my hand. This time I didn't refuse him, but walked with him, but what I didn't expect was that Song Junmu didn't take me directly to school but took me to the community. I walked around for a long time, as if I was very familiar with the neighborhood.

"You seem to be familiar with this neighborhood."

Song Junmu smiled awkwardly: "I used to live here..."

The wind blew through the leaves, and it was rustling in my ears. He hesitated to speak, I lowered my head, and quickly searched for something in my memory. He said that we have met before. Could it be a partner who played together when I was young? My memory is a little fuzzy, and I can't tell who it is.

Song Junmu seemed to have guessed my thoughts. He rubbed my hair: "If you don't think of it, don't think about it. Anyway, there will be more opportunities in the future."

Chance?An indescribable feeling flashed through my heart.Yes, there is still a chance with Song Junmu, but with Su Luoyan, even if he knows that he is not related by blood, so what?I will definitely keep that secret forever!

"Su Ruo, I warn you, if you lose your mind in front of me again, I will definitely fix you severely!" Song Junmu pretended to shake his fist at me "viciously".

I shrank back pretending to be scared: "Please forgive me, sir."

A simple joke made me feel much better, and Song Junmu could see that, the waving fist finally turned into two fingers and flicked on my forehead.

I covered my forehead and pouted aggrievedly: "Hey, are you really my boyfriend? Why don't you know how to pity me like a delicate flower?"

He patted my head and smiled gratifiedly: "Su Ruo, it's great to see your smile like this."

I silently said to him in my heart, "Thank you".

Thank you for being by my side, thank you for your smile and warmth.

04
When Song Junmu sent me to the downstairs of the dormitory, he suddenly received a call. He seemed to be in a hurry, so he smiled and said to me: "I will wait for you to eat at the door of your dormitory at noon tomorrow."

I nodded and watched him leave in a daze, my heart throbbed suddenly, and my eyes dimmed, Song Junmu, Song Junmu, Song Junmu...

I really want to call him to stop, he is so kind to me, so considerate, but I think of Su Luoyan, I suddenly feel guilty for playing with his feelings!But his throat gradually tightened, and he couldn't make a sound.

There are many lights and shadows in the night, and my heart is suddenly silent again.I stood at the school gate for a long time, and I didn't know when I started to walk back. When I got to the downstairs of the dormitory, I saw Su Luoyan.

It's that Su Luoyan, Su Luoyan whom I haven't seen for a long time...

I looked at him and smiled at him, the night wind blows through the treetops, I don't know where it blows...

Is this a dream?Since I met him, I have woken up from my dream.

Disordered thoughts haunt me, and I breathe tremblingly.Now that I know that Su Luoyan and I are not related by blood, I can love him openly, but...

For my father, for my family, I must keep this secret until one day I will no longer appear in this world.

So, I can only smile at Su Luo.

In the quiet night, the moonlight is hazy, and the memories of the past are pouring out.It has been almost a month since Jiang Chuan's last birthday.I've been thinking about Su Luoyan all the time, but now, I suddenly realize that when I meet him again, I don't know what to say.

"Su Ruo." He called me.

I responded, not knowing what to say.

Su Luoyan was silent for a while and asked, "How have you been recently?"

I nodded: "Very good, how about you?"

"is acceptable."

After the simple greetings, we were all silent.After a long time, Su Luoyan suddenly said, "Su Ruo, are you really dating Song Junmu?"

I thought he was going to ask something, but it turned out to be about Song Junmu, I nodded: "Yes, I'm dating him, aren't you also dating Ji Nuannuan?"

"not like this……"

I was slightly taken aback, and he said it wasn't like that, so what on earth is it?I want to ask, but Su Luoyan may not be able to answer, there is only a [-]% chance of this, and I don't have the courage to ask after all.

I clenched my hands tightly and remained silent for a long time, but Su Luoyan still didn't say anything.I suddenly wanted to laugh, why was he guessed by me again.

"Brother..." I felt that the word was squeezed out by me. I looked at him, such a good-looking Su Luoyan, with picturesque features, tranquil and elegant.

I used to wish so much that he wasn't my brother, but now that I know he isn't, I hope he is, so that my parents won't be more sad because of it.

Now he and I seem to be unable to maintain even the superficial relationship of brother and sister...

I lowered my gaze: "Brother, it's getting late, I have to go back." I abruptly turned my head to the side and stopped looking at him.

"Su Ruo."

He held my hand tightly behind me, trying to make his voice softer: "Su Ruo, will you listen to me?"

In November, the leaves of the trees in front of the dormitory swayed softly in the night wind.My footsteps stopped suddenly, and I turned my head to stare at him steadily.

The moonlight fell on him like a stream, and everything else faded into shadows.

"Su Ruo, everyone in the school knows that Song Junmu is not a good person. He idles around and fights every day. He has changed girlfriends one after another. I don't want my sister to be one of them, do you understand?"

"Are you afraid that I will embarrass you?" I regretted saying this, how hurtful my words were, no matter what he cared about me, I actually...

"Brother, I'm sorry, I'm not..."

"Is that what you think? Su Ruo, is this what you think?"

"I didn't mean that, but...can you be fair to Song Junmu, you said he was not good, let me leave. I also heard that Ji Nuannuan was doing an improper job outside, why didn't you leave her ?”

Su Luoyan's gaze suddenly wandered: "Ji Nuannuan is different from Song Junmu."

"Is it different?" In fact, there is no difference, what is different is the prejudiced heart.

"Su Ruo."

"Brother, I'm so tired, I want to go back and rest." I can't listen to anything he said, I thought his appearance today would be a good start, we can resolve all the conflicts during this period, just like we did when we were young , even if I was beaten by my father because of him, I can no longer hate him because of his smile.

But I found that things are not what I thought. I know that Song Junmu is not good, he has too many shortcomings, and too many people hate him, but he will always stand by my side and give me warmth. The current Su Luoyan can't do it.I am so eager for warmth, so eager.

His voice suddenly became hoarse: "Su Ruo..."

"Don't talk anymore, I don't want to hear..." I don't want to talk to him anymore, everything is in vain, everyone has a different point of view, talking more is just an argument, no matter what time it is, I don't want to argue with him, I don't want to talk to him quarrel.

The night was silent, and there was another silence between me and him.

"Yo, so you are here."

It's Ji Nuannuan's voice!
Ji Nuannuan came over, took Su Luoyan's arm, leaned on Su Luoyan's body, and said coquettishly: "You worry me, I must punish you." She said, and touched her with her fingertips. his lips.

I frowned, I really hate her!
Probably aware of my gaze, Ji Nuannuan turned her head and looked at me with crooked eyes, smiling coquettishly and mockingly, but it was this smile that made me tremble inexplicably.

I hung my head, suppressing some emotion.The intimacy between the two of them burned my eyes, and I stood there stiffly, making an excuse to go upstairs, I didn't want to see them again.

"Su Ruo!"

Su Luoyan called my name behind my back, but I ignored it again.

I was walking recklessly in the corridor of the dormitory, and suddenly bumped into a person, I looked up, and it turned out to be Ding Jiaqi, at that moment, I suddenly had an urge to retreat.

Ding Jiaqi looked at me and asked, "Su Ruo, what's wrong with you?"

I looked at Ding Jiaqi with some fear. Even though we had chatted before, she was considered acquainted. After all, she was Song Junmu's suitor. I don't know if she will hate me because of my affair with Song Junmu.

Ding Jiaqi said: "The relationship between you and Song Junmu has been rumored by everyone. I heard that you are the one who posted Song Junmu."

I looked at her, slightly surprised.In fact, I also want to post back, but unfortunately I have no money.When going out with Song Junmu, he basically pays the bill, and I just eat and drink.

Ding Jiaqi laughed suddenly: "Don't be nervous, I'm not here to scare you, I can be considered to know Song Junmu, he is a person, he can't post if he wants to."

I lowered my head silently, feeling very sorry for Senior Sister, and I didn't know what to say when I met her.

Ding Jiaqi patted me on the shoulder: "As long as you feel good."

The meaning of her words made me stunned, and my depressed heart suddenly became dazed again.I turned around and called out to her back: "Sister...thank you!"

I was serious!Although I haven't sorted out my thoughts and feelings yet, I am very clear about Ding Jiaqi, and I must thank her.

"Sister, why did you help me?" I have never figured this out.

She smiled at me sadly: "Because you are the girl he likes!"

"Why?" I don't understand. Generally speaking, shouldn't it be annoying to treat a rival in love?

"Su Ruo, do you know? You are the first girl he really likes. After seeing you in the restaurant that time, he approached me. He said that he found his princess and wanted to protect it. Then he Tell me, let me not act rashly, he doesn't expect me to help him protect you, but he definitely doesn't want me to hurt you, otherwise he won't let it go."

"Princess?" Is it me?

"Yes, princess. You are the little princess he thinks. Although I don't think you can compare to me, or even any of his previous girlfriends, you are the one he thinks, so Su Ruo, please Cherish him well, okay?"

I nodded in a daze. I heard some words from outsiders, but it was even more shocking.When he was with Song Junmu, he also said that I was his princess, but I just listened to it as a joke, but Ding Jiaqi...

I stood there in a daze because of her answer for a long time without reacting.It turns out that there is a feeling in this world that can make you give silently and selflessly. It turns out that there is another person in this world who treats me like a treasure.

That night, I lay in bed, but couldn't fall asleep because of tossing and turning.Staring blankly at the ceiling, thinking of Ding Jiaqi's words, my heart felt desolate, I turned over countless times, and finally fell asleep unconsciously.

(End of this chapter)