Hunter and Hussar

Chapter 47 Anxiety of being replaced
"Kepway, come out! Don't think I don't know what you're doing..."

Mi Le opened the door of the toilet compartment with a "swish".I didn't lock it.He saw it all.

"I'm sorry...it's disgusting to you." Before I finished speaking, I was busy spitting the stuff that came up into the urinal again.I feel sick myself.

"I'm sorry, I thought, you just..." He closed the compartment door and leaned against it, as if guarding.

After confirming that nothing could be poured out, I pressed the flush switch very carefully.Mi Le opened the compartment door again, and I walked down. He kept patting my back, asking me if I was okay, and took me to the sink to wash my mouth and face.

"I'm sorry. I made you angry today." After walking out of the bathroom, the temperatureless sunlight shone directly on my face, as if the dizziness hadn't subsided, but I definitely apologized to Mi Le.

"I'm pretty bad, too. You must be very uncomfortable. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I used all my bad intentions on you. Okay, let's not say anything." coat, he hugged me by the arms and waist.

"It's so uncomfortable."

"Cry if you want to cry. Don't hold back. I will cry with you. After crying, let's go back and have fun. I will never be angry with you again."

I didn't cry much.You have to find a way to divert your attention away.Everyone is waiting for me and Mi Le.Especially my sister, if I go back too late, she will definitely find something strange.No, she might have found out.

"Mi Le, I can probably understand why you are upset. But, can you tell me again? I want to change it, so it won't be like this next time." I said.

"How should I put it... well, I said it, but... alas."

"It's okay, just say whatever comes to your mind."

"You have a good relationship with brother Xianxian."

"pretty good."

"So, have you ever worried? Just worried that you will be replaced."

"Replaced?"

"For example, Brother Xianxian has a very good friend. He is inseparable from him, talking and laughing. He is a bit like you, but different. He is better than you in some aspects. Are you a little jealous? Or afraid? He took your place in the younger brother's heart? From now on, the younger brother will play with him, not with you..." He twisted his furry head for a while, then shook it again, "No, this example is not good After all, you two are brothers, no matter what, it is impossible for you to never get along with each other. I'm sorry, you just treat me as nonsense. Sorry, I didn't understand clearly, and I mentioned brother Xianxian."

It's fine.In fact, you are not wrong at all.In the past, I did worry about this kind of thing.There was one Saturday, and Xianxian didn't go home all night.I waited in the room for him not to come, so I went to ask my mother, she said that he had spent the night at Zhao Rui's house and would not come back tonight.After returning to the room, I was so anxious and angry that I threw pillows on the wall, crackling—his and mine were thrown out.Thinking about it now, I am a little jealous of Zhao Rui, as if he snatched my brother away, even though it was only for one night.It dawned on me that I was not unique, that someone else could do it better than me.Zhao Rui, he and I are in the same position.Some places are quite similar, the physical fitness is very poor, my team is the third from the bottom, and he is the second from the bottom.The bottom one is Pu Yun, that foreign school student who played against you in the last friendly match. After he improved, I became the bottom two.But Zhao Rui is taller than me, and his academic performance is also very good. I often watch him discuss problems with Xianxian, and I am left alone, as if I will never be able to join the circle of these good students. Although no one looks down on me, they still think about me. of.Apart from the goal line technique, I have nothing better than Zhao Rui.He also has a better temper than me, and is always amiable, unlike me, who uses Xian Xian as a punching bag from time to time.Sometimes I wonder if Xianxian would prefer Zhao Rui to be his older brother or younger brother.He is more perfect than me.I only saw him lose his temper once, when he was arguing with Pu Yun about who is Xianxian's best friend.That time Xianxian said, neither of them, but me.You don't know how happy I am to hear that sentence, it's the pinnacle of my life, the highest evaluation I've ever received in my life.Maybe there's a saying that's comparable to it, and that's what you said to me, "You're my best friend."My life is basically useless, but with these two sentences, I thought, I have to live well.When Ye Ruiyang introduced us to A Fang today, he also said similar things.This kind of words is so important to me, it seems to prove that my life is not meaningless.At least, at least it makes sense to other people, even if it's just a few people. (Actually, some of what my sister said meant the same to me.)
Maybe I went crazy and asked Xianxian to buy me new gloves that day because I was afraid that I would be replaced by Zhao Rui.I heard he played really well that day.I'm so selfish, why should I ask my younger brother to buy things for me?He should go play with Zhao Rui and have a good rest.I do it for my own selfish desires.He must hate me.I don't blame A Fang, and I don't blame everyone. I should be punished, but the punishment never came.I deserve it.Everyone has said so much inequality, but it is not enough to compare with the inequality between life and death.I am still alive, and I can still play happily with everyone in the playground.Where is the string?Why was he the one who died?Why should I die because of a wish that has no meaning at all?i'm such a jerk...

I got more and more excited.I didn't want to think about the past anymore.But I can't help myself.I didn't realize it when I listened to it, but now I feel that the sad song seems to be sung to me in another world by him.Although I know he can't sing.Many times I hoped emptyly that he would give me some response, but there was still no news from the people in that world.

"Stop talking about it. That's not the case. Don't you know how brother Xianxian left? Why do you think he died because of you? How do you know he will hate you?"

Mi Le shook my arm like a swing.

"Don't think like that. No! You're not Cao Cao. You're nice and responsible. You're my best friend. My best friend is a super super awesome kid, just as awesome as I am.

"You have to know that your elder brother Xianxian is not a monarch, not a father and son, nor a husband and wife. You two are brothers. Don't think about that song again! Otherwise, I will hate Ye Junfang, even if he didn't mean it. Even if it's for Me, you have to be happier. If you are sad, I will be even sadder."

He took out a napkin and wiped my face clean, then took out the piece of candy my sister gave him, tore off the wrapper, and handed it to me.The round and perfect taste of sugar spreads in the mouth, gently suppressing the tension and fear.I was like a big doll, pulled by Mi Le, and obediently returned to everyone.They were all waiting for us. As soon as the front foot arrived, Ye Junfang said that he was going to start singing the classic excerpt "Zao Luo Pao" from the Kunqu Opera "The Peony Pavilion".It turns out that the colorful flowers are blooming all over the place, and they are all ruined like this. No matter what kind of day is the beautiful scenery on a good day, who's home is a place to enjoy the pleasure.Flying in the morning and rolling in the evening, clouds and green pavilions, rain and wind, smoke and waves painting boats, the people of Jinping look at the cheapness of this time.He sang even better than before. Unfortunately, I don't know much about Kunqu opera, so I didn't understand it. I can only appreciate his beautiful singing and posture.Ye Ruiyang told us that A Fang's "Zao Luo Pao" is sung one less time, and once his voice changes, it will be difficult to sing. [1]
Because the flying fire meteor was too thrilling, everyone expressed that they did not want to seek excitement in the morning.Avoiding the jumping machine and roller coaster, we visited the castle and the hall of mirrors together, and played a few shooting games.Ye Ruiyang and Yue Yin hit the most, and exchanged a few dolls for everyone.I kept a dull face, and my sister told me to smile more at least twice.She didn't say anything after seeing the two of us coming back. It wasn't until we walked for a while that Mi Le and I discovered that our pockets were full of candies at some point.

[1] "Zao Luo Pao": Zao Luo Pao is the name of Kunqu opera, and the most famous aria of "The Peony Pavilion" is sung with this tune. mentality change.

(End of this chapter)