don't mess with me

Chapter 57
If this magic trick is useless in normal occasions, it’s just moving things secretly while people are not paying attention. Anyone who has coaxed children will smile knowingly, but the problem is that we never leave our seats!
Director Liu put the ashtray back to its original position, his expression could not be calm for a long time, and finally he gave the only possible conclusion: "You bought another ashtray according to my ashtray, and put it in that room beforehand?"

I laughed and said, "We don't know what kind of cigarette you smoke, you can see that the butt has not been touched."

Director Liu looked at his ashtray, and finally admitted: "Yes, there is a piece on this corner - I'm convinced!"

"The registration thing..."

"I'm calling now." Director Liu dialed a number, which seemed to be a direct call to the TV station, and said in a vague voice, "Well... Mr. Wang, I have a contestant with a special situation, he wants to Go to "Assortment of Miscellaneous Demons"..."

Director Liu muttered something, hung up the phone and said, "The program team will find a way, the rematch will be at 6:[-] tomorrow night."

"Okay, thank you, Director Liu."

Director Liu asked Ai Ai periodically: "Well... can I ask you how the magic changed?"

I looked at Lu Dongbin, and Lu Dongbin said casually, "Yes, I'll tell you."

Director Liu subconsciously leaned over to listen carefully, and Lu Dongbin demonstrated, "Did I shake like that just now?"

"Yes, yes, then what?"

"In fact, I have already held this thing in my hand." Lu Dongbin swiped like this as usual, and sandwiched the huge ashtray between his fingers and the tiger's mouth.

Director Liu didn't care that he was full of loopholes, so he asked eagerly, "And then?"

"And then—" Lu Dongbin waved his hand violently, "I'll just throw it over there." Director Liu followed his hand and watched intently, and then found that Lu Dongbin had put the ashtray back with his other hand Only then did he realize that he had been molested.

Lu Dongbin laughed and walked out, leaving only Director Liu to watch us leave in a daze...

After exiting the municipal committee building, I asked Lu Dongbin, "Brother Bin, do we need to buy some props or something?"

Lu Dongbin said: "What kind of props do you want? Is it not enough for me?"

"Then, I won't worry about it."

……

After going home for dinner, I continued to study the video with Tianjie Doll, and analyzed who might enter the resurgence. Except for one of the jujitsu practitioners who was favored by us, the others were at a loss. In the end, we simply I don't even bother to read it.

Nezha said, "Brother Xiaoqiang, my results have come down."

"Oh, how many points did you get?"

The ranking doesn't matter at all—it's the last one anyway, and it's the problem I'm most worried about. If Nezha only got a single-digit score in the test, Gao Bingyan should ask me to persuade him to quit tomorrow.

Nezha said, "I got 38th place in the exam."

"How many?"

"38." Nezha explained, "If it wasn't for saving Pippi the night before and not taking care of reviewing homework, it is estimated that there will be 10 places ahead."

"How did you do it?" More than 60 people got 38 in the exam, which is similar to my grades back then, and Gao Dingyan's class is a fast class with top students, and the gold content is very high.

Nezha said: "I'm getting bad marks in English, and the title of the composition is "Teaching a man to fish is worse than teaching him to fish". It's not a problem at first, but I can't write many simplified Chinese characters, so I had to change other words, and the result was a score. Also low."

Speaking of composition, I suddenly remembered that the title of our composition was about Lu Dongbin. It said that a beggar on the side of the road was about to freeze and starve to death, and then Lu Dongbin opened his gold finger and ordered a few pieces of gold for him. When asked what he wanted, the beggar pointed to Lu Dongbin and said, "I want your finger." Then the topic was derived from this matter, let us analyze that a person should be far-sighted and have a long-term vision. The truth in my heart at that time The idea is: this guy is too shameless.

When I told Lu Dongbin about this, Lu Dongbin smiled and said, "Don't say that it really happened."

"Then how do you do it?" I asked curiously.

"What else can I do?" Lu Dongbin suddenly said angrily, "I grabbed that grandson and beat him up, I want my fingers, damn it!"

We all laughed.

……

After dinner the next day, I drove Lu Dongbin and Tianjie Doll to the recording site of "The Assortment of Demons". The program team rented a studio in the city's film factory to do the scene, but it was not on the TV station.

After registering my name and purpose at the entrance, we found Studio No. 5. After hearing about my intentions, the director of the program group quickly dragged me to a dressing room where no one was working, and said to me: "There was originally a Five contestants will participate in the resurrection competition, and you will be six, but the program has not changed much. After the judges in the first round select the top three, the original audience judges will eliminate one contestant and replace it with two contestants, and then the two will PK, you We must try our best to break into the top three in the first round. We introduce you as a 'mysterious player'. If your performance is eye-catching, no one will ask much. If you drag it to the round of audience judges, you will definitely die, because you were not popular before. The temporary appearance and ambiguous identity, people with a discerning eye will understand what's going on, you understand it, right?"

I nodded and said, "That means I can't make mistakes in my debut performance."

The director said: "You can break the rules and participate in the resurrection competition. Director Liu and our director have signed a guarantee that nothing will happen to me. I agree. If you mess up our show, we will be scolded for shady immediately."

I said, "It's definitely not going to be smashed."

The director continued: "If you are eliminated after breaking into the top three, and someone asks about your eligibility, we will say that it was because of a mistake in the registration that you were missed, and now we are giving you a chance as compensation. Remember this statement."

It seems that the director has not been very optimistic about me, and the wipes are ready.

Lu Dongbin laughed and said, "It's not necessary, don't worry."

Only then did the director take a look at me and said, "Where are your props and costumes?"

"Props? Costumes?" I was taken aback by the question.

The director became impatient: "Even if you don't need props, you can't just wear this to perform on stage, right?"

The night was sweltering, and I was wearing a vest with big underpants. Lu Dongbin said that there was no need for props, so it never occurred to me that I had to prepare performance costumes.

Lu Dongbin said: "It's enough if the show is exciting, what costumes do you want?"

The director asked me: "Who is this person?"

I said casually, "It's my prop master."

The director asked Lu Dongbin again: "Then what about the props you prepared?"

Lu Dongbin spread his hands: "No!"

The director stomped his feet angrily and said, "Destroy me!"

At this time, someone outside the door called the director, and the director walked out and said to me: "Go to the dressing room and wipe your face."

I took out a tissue and said, "No, I'm not sweating."

The director was really anxious: "Go!"

When I got to the public dressing room, I realized that tonight's five contestants had already arrived. There were three makeup artists in the dressing room. The so-called face scrubbing is not just a wipe, but powder and red. Once the lights on the house are turned on, people will look very dull without these measures. I am ashamed of my ignorance.

The contestants and the make-up artist were chatting and laughing—although they were all eliminated contestants, they were also the most popular contestants in history. They had dealt with each other a lot during the qualifiers, and I was the only one who was completely new. .

Seeing that one of the contestants had just finished putting on makeup, I walked over and sat on his chair. The young girl's makeup artist asked doubtfully, "Who are you?"

I gave her a smiling face and said, "I am the sixth contestant tonight, please."

The little girl probably also heard about this, picked up the paint brush and wiped my face, saying: "I've never seen you before."

At this time, a sissy next to me who was pale without powder turned her head and gave me a sideways glance: "Did you come in through the back door?"

I didn't bother to listen to what he had to say, and recognized him first—this Wang Yisan was the one who had performed jujitsu. I quickly reached out and said, "It's a pleasure to meet you, you are my idol." Ah!" That's not a compliment, I really think it's not easy for him.

Wang Yisan ignored my outstretched hand, turned his eyes as white as his face, and said contemptuously: "What's the trouble? You think Leng Buding is a dark horse when he appears like this?"

Me: "..." I finally had an idol and was despised.

Wang Yisan didn't know what the big evil fire was, so he stood up and pointed at my nose and said, "Don't you just know a lot of people? If you know a lot of people, you should sell insurance, you can sell Amway, if you can't do it, you can do it." Go to pyramid schemes, getting something for nothing is a sense of superiority, right? You think that others see you in the eyes of a rich second-generation official, don’t you—who runs this place to embarrass yourself?”

The other contestants couldn't stand it anymore, and said one after another: "Hey, what are you talking about?"

Wang Yisan snorted angrily and pointed at me, "I said what about him, why are you making fun of him? They are all shameless, they are all eliminated by others, and they still use themselves as a role!"

It's not that I quarreled with this kind of person, so I had to smile wryly and let the makeup artist do the makeup.

Among the contestants, a young man dressed as a magician said, "Didn't you also be eliminated?"

Wang Yisan snorted and said, "If I didn't meet a hot girl, would I be eliminated? That woman is really better than me? Isn't she just big breasts and big butt?"

All the contestants knew that they were most afraid of such unreasonable troubles in quarrels, so they all kept silent rationally.

Tianjie Doll said happily: "I didn't expect to receive so much anger before the show even started. We didn't come in vain."

Lu Dongbin said: "Brother, if you are too angry, you will get sick if you don't pay attention."

Wang Yisan glared at Lu Dongbin, and broke his leg as if in demonstration—this guy can kick his left leg from the back of his head to his right ear...

At a quarter to eight, the audience began to enter the arena. The audience also seemed quite excited to participate in this exciting game. Many people sneaked backstage to find Wang Yisan's autograph, and some took photos with other contestants, but they were far inferior to Wang Yisan. There are so many Yisan, Wang Yisan looks at us coldly while pretending to be unassuming, but whenever there are beautiful female audiences, he will disguise himself as a snake and coil around them...

At 8:[-], the program entered the countdown to recording and broadcasting. The assistant director and the host came to greet me respectively. In order to maintain the sense of mystery, I was the last one to appear.

At 8:[-], the last preparation was made, the actors touched up their makeup, and the lighting and sound effects were fully turned on.

At 8:[-], as the music sounded, the host jumped to the center of the stage alive and kicking, and the audience gave warm applause.The host introduced the four judges, played around for a few minutes, and the show officially started.

Wang Yisan was the first to appear on the stage. After all, he was still the most popular contestant. He attracted applause as soon as he appeared on the stage. Wang Yisan was wearing a silver-gray tights, and he drilled in a tube that was slightly thicker than the mouth of the bowl. I have to say, he still has real kung fu, anyway, I am dazzled by seeing it, and the faces of the other players are cloudy, as if they are not sure.

The second one to appear was the young magician. As an introduction, he first scattered a large pool of playing cards on the stage, then moved out of the magic box, and threw various small hidden weapons out from inside. A paper towel, checked by the audience afterwards, the glass tank is not broken, and the paper towel is not wet.It was also a piece of applause.

I was fascinated, until the fourth contestant's performance was almost over, and the host suddenly ran over to me in a hurry and asked, "What's the name of your show?"

"Huh?" It was only then that I realized that I was not an audience.

The host gritted his teeth anxiously and asked, "Do you want to perform acrobatics or magic?"

I glanced at Lu Dongbin, not sure: "Magic...?"

"What's your name?" The host probably took my heart, and there shouldn't have been such a big mistake - I didn't even know what show the contestant was performing, but I was temporarily arranged to come in, so I almost stabbed him basket.

Lu Dongbin and I stared wide-eyed, and he lost his mind. I simply hugged my feet and grabbed the young magician and asked, "What are traditional magic tricks?"

The magic youth laughed and said: "Great transformation into a living person, transformation into a goldfish, flying into the sky..."

I told the host: "Goldenfish transformation! Let's play a goldfish transformation!"

The host jumped out again...

I asked Lu Dongbin in a low voice, "Is it okay to change into a goldfish?"

Lu Dongbin asked blankly, "How did it change?"

I asked the magic youth again: "How did it change?"

The magic youth was completely devastated by us: "You guys are here to be funny—to transform into a goldfish is to transform into a fish tank, there are fish and water in it, and if you are more particular, you have to transform back."

I asked Lu Dongbin again: "Is it okay?"

Lu Dongbin breathed a sigh of relief and said, "If you know how to change, then there is no problem."

This time the fifth contestant has also come on stage, and it will be me soon, so I became nervous for no reason: how have I ever been on stage before?The last time I gave a speech at school was solved by a talk show, this is not a talk show!
At this time, the host said loudly at the front desk: "We welcome our last mysterious contestant, Yan Tingqiang, to make his debut, and the show he wants to bring to everyone is—Goldfish Change!"

(End of this chapter)