Secret Love · Orange Raw Huainan

Chapter 97 So You Knew Already

Luo Zhi's mother delayed the Spring Festival before deciding to move with Uncle Chen to his hometown in Guangxi.

Luo Zhi doesn't need to worry about packing and tidying up, her mother has always been very capable in taking care of her life.In fact, when she came home on the evening of New Year's Eve, what she saw was a half-empty house.

The anxiety and guilt on her mother's face made her really want to laugh.During the summer vacation of her sophomore year, she did not go home because of an internship.According to Luoyang, her mother called his mother countless times, repeating over and over again: "Is it because I am going to move away with Lao Chen, the child feels that he has no home, feels uncomfortable, and doesn't want to see me?"

This realization made Luo Zhi dumbfounded, so she hurried back home during the National Day of the [-]th to reassure her mother.

"I always have to be on my own. What's more, in the later stages of college, many people don't go home during the holidays. Some do internships, some prepare for exams, and prepare to apply abroad. In short, everyone has their own direction. Mom, you really think too much. I'm not a kid anymore."

As she spoke, she looked at her room, which was still clean, not even a single table decoration had been moved.

"What is your plan for this house?"

"He has his own house in Guangxi, which is enough for us to live in. I have been there several times before and cleaned everything up."

"Then why don't we just sell it here?"

"What nonsense! This house is reserved for you."

"Give it to me?" Luo Zhi couldn't help but laugh, "I'm sure I won't come back after I graduate. This kind of old house doesn't have much room for appreciation, and waiting for demolition is even more useless."

Luo Zhi's mother was making dumplings, and her face darkened when she heard this: "You can rent it out, but you can't sell it."

"why?"

"This is left to you by your grandmother."

Luo Zhi was surprised, the hot milk brought to her mouth almost scalded her tongue.She never wondered where this little home came from.After her father died, she and her mother moved away from her grandma's house, lived in her grandma's house for a short period of time, and soon moved here.I can't remember any other past events, as if this is a place that should exist.

She has always known that grandma is actually a person who is cold on the outside and hot on the inside. It is a pity that she was not sensible enough when she was a child. She only knew how to judge people by looking at her appearance. She thought that grandma didn't like her father and refused them to enter the house. She was a scary old woman.

When she finally grew up and understood this horrible old woman, the old woman was no longer alive.

She told Luoyang before that she didn't know grandma well, and asked him what kind of person grandma was.What Luoyang didn't know was that grandma's funeral wasn't the first time she stepped into the old house.

In fact, no matter how scary the old lady is, she has a weak side.No matter what, the old lady couldn't bear to drive out her daughter who disobeyed herself and insisted on marrying a small worker from another country.Luo Zhi remembered that she was taken to her grandmother's house by her mother like a thief, and she nodded vigorously to promise that she would never tell anyone.Then one day my father found out somehow, and called my grandmother's house, saying that he was going to pick her up.

Grandma's face was so gloomy like the weather that day.

That day was the snowy night when her father died in a machine accident.

For more than half a year after that day, in Luo Zhi's memory was a protracted and chaotic war.Grandma was furious, and blamed her father's death on her mother, Ke Fuxiang.My mother made a big fuss in the factory. After the accident report came out, she became hysterical. She was coaxed and threatened by the gangsters hired by Sheng Huainan's father. .

Luo Zhi looked at herself today, and the woman who was rolling out dumpling wrappers with her head bowed, and suddenly wondered if she had misremembered everything, whether all of this had never happened.

Her mother is not a pure and gentle person, and the setbacks in life once sharpened her to be ruthless. When she learned that her daughter was having fun with Sheng Huainan at the wedding, she slapped Luo Zhi to the ground. on the ground.

Life has never been kind to this woman. In the long time, she dragged a child who didn't understand anything, and she had to learn too much.

However, regarding grandma, Luo Zhi always remembers one thing.

On the dusty path, grandma led her to walk under the poisonous sun, all the way silent.

Luo Zhi didn't remember where she was going or what she was doing, but only remembered such a silent dirt road.That's it, I kept my mouth shut and endured the sun and walked forward, and the sand hit my face without pain, as if I was angry, but because I was too small, I couldn't tell where the gap was.

The skin of the mouth is dry, and the eyes are still spitting fire.

Her grandmother suddenly said coldly: "You wait for me here."

She came back 5 minutes later, holding a bottle of Wahaha and a bag of Bu Bu Xing in her hands—the two things that Luo Zhi would stare blankly when she saw TV commercials when she was a child.

She anxiously wanted to tear open Bu Bu Xing's packing bag, but she was hit on the back of her hand by her grandmother, and she scolded: "The road is so dirty, I'll eat it later! Hold on, can you die in a hurry?!"

So she held it aggrievedly, and continued to walk, and as she walked, she was still happy.

This endless fragment of memory was once the only evidence in her heart that her grandmother loved her.

"The house of your grandma and grandpa was sold later, and our brothers and sisters shared the medical expenses equally. But they didn't know the origin of this place. This house was left for you by your grandma. Grandma I'm afraid that after she leaves, we will have nowhere to go."

It turns out that they have been living in this old lady's heart for so many years.

"Everyone came to pay their respects years ago. It's unlucky for us to come here on the fourth day of the lunar new year."

"You have to come here before you leave. Because of my internship, the plane landed on New Year's Eve. How come it's ahead of the year? Just to take a look, where did all the feudal superstitions come from?" Luo Zhi finished. , Uncle Chen, who was sitting in the passenger seat, laughed.

"They young people have young people's ideas, so don't argue about it." He turned his head and said to Luo Zhi's mother, and got the other party's reluctant approval.

However, Luo Zhi's mother still insisted on some of her traditions, such as burning two pieces of paper money first and throwing them aside, so as to save the kid from robbing the money.Luo Zhi stood aside, and couldn't help but start to mutter about how bad the law and order in the underworld really is.

She stood aside and watched her mother fiddle with the paper money with an iron hook to ensure that they were fully burned, and then she kept saying that she hoped that Luo Zhi's father would forgive and let him relax, she definitely did not abandon him and his daughter.

Luo Zhi rolled her eyes, feeling a little helpless tenderness in her heart.

Luo Zhi's mother would cry so pale every time she came over to burn paper, she couldn't even stand up, so she still insisted on sending the urn back by herself.She walked through the cold and empty corridor again, holding the small box like an ice cube in her hand, and suddenly remembered the scene a year ago.

Luo Zhi walked slowly, trying to find the room she had entered by mistake that time, but the parking rooms with red silk everywhere seemed to disappear out of thin air.She turned around for a long time, and had no choice but to accept her fate. Looking at the house number, she walked back to the shelf where her father's ashes were placed.

Then, with a glance, he saw a woman sitting by the window sill.

Luo Zhi gasped, and almost threw the urn out.Seeing her movement, the woman hurried over and stretched out her hands to catch it.

"Be careful!"

That tone seemed to be closer to this bone than Luo Zhi's.

"Why is it you again?" Luo Zhi was surprised.

The woman wasn't dressed so scary this time. She wore a normal light gray down jacket, woolen pants, and black leather shoes. She still wore a headscarf. Her face was no longer swollen. She looked like a normal middle-aged woman.

The eyes were still beautiful, with the youthful brilliance of old days.

The urn was still in Luo Zhi's hands, but the woman gently placed her rough and swollen hands on the lid, groping over and over again, as if she would never let go.

For a long time, Luo Zhi didn't speak. She felt that she wasn't too scared. She wanted to ask something, but she thought it must have something to do with her father, so she couldn't open her mouth.

"who are you?"

After all, she chose the simplest question, but she didn't expect the other party to speak at the same time, asking softly, "Can you let me take some of his ashes away?"

Luo Zhi reacted to this question for a long time, and asked blankly, "Why?"

"I beg you."

"why?"

"Can you promise me first? You two didn't come on the memorial day this year. I come around every day, thinking about whether I can meet you. I know your mother is going to the south and won't come back. Give me his ashes." Can't you? I won't take all of it, I'll just take a little bit, can't I?"

The woman knelt down as she spoke.

Luo Zhi was horrified, and quickly squatted down. After persuading her for a long time, she just wouldn't stand up.

"You know my dad?"

"Earlier than your mother." She said indifferently.

Luo Zhi's flight back to school was at noon on the fifth day of the new year. Her mother and Uncle Chen's flight was two hours earlier than hers. A lot of luggage had already been delivered to Guangxi by railway express one after another before, so the three of them packed lightly. Arrived at the airport.

"You two talk, I'm going to smoke a cigarette."

While waiting for the plane, Uncle Chen took the initiative to leave, leaving Luo Zhi's mother tightly holding her hand, giving endless instructions.

"Mom, I'm just going back to school. If you don't go to Guangxi, I can only see you once a year during the holidays. What's the difference now? Isn't it that I will go to Guangxi every year after the change. You make a scene like parting from life and death. So sad."

Luo Zhi's mother smiled embarrassingly, and talked for a while before she calmed down. She just held her hand, not knowing what she was laughing at.

"Lolo, you and your boyfriend...is he the one I think?"

Luo Zhi stepped back in surprise, and saw the complex smile on her mother's face, which was mixed with a lot of tolerance and guilt.

"You know? How do you know?"

Her mother sighed: "Don't blame me, Luo Luo, I already knew that you liked this boy in high school."

Luo Zhi was stunned.

Her mother had seen her diary, not just the single sheet in the exercise book.She didn't have the habit of locking and hiding the diary, but she always thought that her mother would not pry.She was an excellent student in high school, and she didn't have any bad behavior. She thought that her mother, who was busy with her livelihood, would not bother to look at these things. After all, her grades and behavior were beyond reproach.

"I've always felt that I'm sorry for you."

"You still think you're sorry for my dad, sorry for my grandma, and sorry for everyone. God is sorry for you." Luo Zhi shook her head.

"No. Lolo, I didn't start to reflect until you were in college. Forgive mom, I have to slowly learn how to take care of the children, how to educate you, and care about you. You have always been quiet, what's the matter It's all hidden in my heart. I'm always in a mood, crying for a while, and getting angry for a while—yes, I'm bitter, but I'm a burden on you."

Luo Zhi must admit that objectively speaking, her mother is indeed not a very good mother.When she was a child, she was trembling, but when she grew up, she was indifferent to everything. It was difficult for her to explain how many of these character defects were related to this, but she never looked back and thought about what if.

No one is born to be a mother. My mother and she grew up together. Today, both of them have changed in a good direction. This is a good thing.

Good things are enough.she thinks.

"Did you almost die of anger at that time? That's a son who killed his father and his enemy." She smiled wryly.

"I am not angry."

"impossible."

"I'm serious!" She held Luo Zhi's hand tightly, and sighed, "I thought at the time that this was fate. When you were young, I beat you for playing with his children, and then... But this is fate. I want to talk to you, but you bury everything in my heart. I’m afraid I’ll make you sad if I say it badly. After all, you’ve become more cheerful, so I thought, if you like it, you’ll like it. Girls at this age will fall in love with someone, after a long time, if it fades away, it will be fine.”

"Then what if it doesn't get better?" Luo Zhi suddenly felt her nose sore, she turned her head, not wanting to be seen by her mother sitting on the right.

"It's no good, that's it."

"What? Don't you think I'm sorry for my father?"

"That's a matter between adults. As long as you are healthy and happy, I am worthy of him."

Mother.Luo Zhi closed her eyes, tears streaming down her cheeks like two scalding rivers.

Her plane was relatively late, so watching her mother leave with Uncle Chen step by step, her arms were sore from waving.For a moment, she even wanted to sing "Sister, you go forward boldly" to her mother-this deviant whim can only be buried in her heart.

If her mother knew that she spent a long time in the building to pry open the urn and help others steal her father's ashes, she might not be so relieved to board the plane.

That was a story she didn't want her mother to know.Childhood sweethearts, mutual love, only because the man's mother wanted to cling to another family, arrange jobs and register for the children in the family, they were separated abruptly.The woman had an abortion, and the filial son obediently married the person he introduced.The wife gave birth to a daughter, and she wanted the child to be named after her grandmother, which drove his mother crazy.When the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law at home quarreled up and down over the child's surname, he ran out full of depression and went to someone else's house to change the gas tank for the miserable woman of his first love.

The ashes are dead things, and the litter box is just a piece of plastic that sells for an exorbitant price.

Because of the thoughts of living people, all this has meaning.

Luo Zhi packed half a bag of ashes and said, "Don't come again. You can take it away."

She watched the woman leave, and she watched her mother leave.This story will fade away with her vague memory of her father.At the beginning, she failed to keep her diary and let it reveal her secrets all over, but she had to keep her mother's insistence.

Her father, most likely, did not love her mother.

But this suspicion can only be kept in her heart.

If it wasn't for love, how could a woman beg for justice for his death, confront the gangsters all over the street with scissors in her bag.

So, it can't be love.

The past is over, and in the future, she will give happiness to her mother and herself.

(End of this chapter)