There is no Epic Loot here, Only Puns.

If Delta was going to be making something to tackle the armies of the unliving dead, she couldn’t just pop out monsters; her 3rd floor was quite full, and as much as Delta tended to ignore certain rules... this one was mostly solid.

For now.

So, if she was being honest, Delta would have to go the way of her nightmares. Unending not-monsters. Mushrooms growing everywhere were considered decorations. Decorations sounded harmless until Delta reminded herself that her decorations exploded.

Well, they also smelled good, shot laser beams, and generally did whatever they wanted, but the important thing was that Delta had unlimited usage of decorations. As long as they didn’t ‘attack’ or block the way to any vital room then Delta could just reasonably and calmly... spam them unchecked.

She checked on the kids and found Vas exploding with tentacles and Giant doing some monk kung fu impression. She stared for a long moment before she moved on, shaking her head.

The things you saw in this dungeon. Seriously...

She flew to the secret garden where her shrooms, acts against nature that they were, were developed automatically with barely any oversight. Delta could just hang a white and red umbrella logo in the corner. The effect would be almost the same as a certain evil Corporation. The development speed of the new flowers and herbs had slowed down overall, though, since you couldn’t endlessly produce new strains without some major issues or needing a heavy dose of fire.

She focused on the room and tried something she had never done before... Delta did her best to hold the images of two different rooms at the same time. Delta held the secret room and the Mushroom Grove of the first floor side by side.

She used her Dungeon senses to draw two lines, one from each room, moving together the space between floors... the feeling was intensely fierce and she hoped this didn’t backfire.

---

Sis felt that, on one hand, Delta was her favourite among the many Dungeons. Everyday, there was a new event. Always new ideas, new directions, new thoughts... and Sis loved it. On the other hand?

A console of light magical screens exploded and sparks went everywhere as mushrooms grew out of the console, breaking apart devices that had taken a very long time to make and sustain. Sis sipped a cup of tea as she watched.

Delta tended to have no brakes on her ride. She was an airship that went higher and higher. A boat that chugged on and on. A mushroom that grew and grew. Sis was used to the explosions now. Being an avatar of the one true Sister, she had been given a limited amount of her real self’s thinking space at the start. This was normal across all Dungeons. Now? She had been allocated more processing power and a bigger room. The amount of things Delta broke did seem like something to worry about...

Sis saw something after a moment, causing her to not fear this new development.

The mushrooms spread their thin threads into a singular unit, weaving in and out the mess of defunct magic wiring and runic devices. Their threads began to connect where wires were exposed, the mushroom caps replaced buttons, and spongy material filled out the missing space.

Decay was the reusing of the old to fuel new growth. Sis saw this now.

Sis could destroy this. Revert everything to the old ways, but Sis and her brother knew this was a dead-end. Delta was the key. Delta was the whole reason they even tried this.

Sister and Brother were such silly old godlings (by most people’s reckonings), the mistakes they had caused - the pain they experienced trying to fix their problems, which would give way to new problems. They tried so hard to care for the life they made possible. Sometimes they worried that they were becoming accustomed to being ‘gods’. Brother was especially against any religion in their name, he got annoyed and tended to curse such buildings with Taxes or infest them with goblins. Sis agreed with the sentiment, but more quietly.

They were people too. They were just doing their best. However, Sis knew they were stuck in old methods. They really did need some young blood to show them some new ideas, someone who could think outside the box.

Sis giggled as the mushrooms began to light up and hum as they started to mimic the various machines. Delta leaked happiness to whomever was willing to just listen. Sis... Sis would protect that. This world desperately needed a little more laughter.

Delta brought more than just a little.

---

The rooms snapped and in between the floors, a single new room was formed. Delta gasped and then clapped her hands once in delight.

“I did it!” she cheered and did her best to fly to this new space to see the results. A room with no entrance or exit, but which drew upon the functions of two different rooms. The secret garden and the Mushroom Grove.

The Secret Grove.

Delta stared around the cave like room and tried to open the window, but a message appeared.

Upgrades and progression are based on parent rooms. No upgrades present here.

Ah, Delta could see that being a fair trade for ignoring the room count and using cross floor cooperation. She focused her attention on her new weapons and a screen opened up.

Please choose base parents for the new breed. End result will always be a mushroom.

Delta cracked her fingers and in the first slot, selected ‘Gutrot’. The list of potential matches and effects began to unfold before her. Delta swallowed once as she adjusted her tie.

“I’m just a tough core doing tough things,” she growled out in her best army voice. Surely, if she did this carefully and weighed the pros and cons- She noticed a button at the bottom of the screen.

Random selection.

Delta stepped back, staggering as she panted.

“What evil must I fall to?” she demanded of no one then looked around for a familiar blue screen. She pursed her lips.

“Maybe first time for luck?” she reasoned. She blew out a sigh after a moment.

“I’m alone, who am I trying to convince? Gacha time!” she giggled and pushed the button and watched options flew past like a slot wheel.

“Something cute, something cute, something cute!” she chanted and the wheels began to slow, revealing a single image that was...

“Fudge,” Delta said, voice sounded shaken. The Gutrot match showed a picture of a curvy tree.

Wyin.

That... was not good.

---

Giant was not someone who could claim to have many fights under his belt. Besides the spider invasion and scuffling with Rale, the only major fight had been against Quiss and that fight had been more verbal than physical.

This child, this being, was proving to be his greatest foe yet. He swung his staff around his massive frame, slapping away three of the four tentacles made from a soft green plant material. Their owner, Vas, moved in to swipe at his leg hard. One wrong move and into the river they would go. The true challenge of the match was, of course, the fact that Vas had means to return to the bridge even if Giant did manage to knock him off. The tentacles would have to be disabled...

Giant moved in as the golem flung himself over his head. Giant reached out and snatched one of those snake-like vines. He yanked, pulling the golem in hard. He flipped the vine over Vas’ head and under another vine. The thing went wild, tangling just as Giant had hoped.

Vas made a palm strike into his chest and Giant gave a grunt of pain as the sheer strength was enough to match his own. He skidded back along the railing and Vas eyed his two tangled vines with a curious expression.

“Logical,” Vas concluded and reached for the tangled mess, but Giant was on him in a second. He would give the boy no time to right himself. He used his staff to vault high into the air, like a pole jumper, spinning to plant his staff into the shoulder of the boy.

If he didn’t dodge then the worst that would occur would be a broken shoulder. Giant wasn’t aiming to murder children in his proper debut as Mother’s bridge guardian. Vas decided to do something odd, however. He leapt back on to the bridge, right into the center.

The bridge shook just a little as the stone and binding roots that formed the foundation of the bridge trembled at the impact.

Giant watched curiously as Vas turned back to his group and seemed to pray to himself silently. No words were heard and his lips moved softly. Giant could definitely guess that he was trying to communicate with his team, but he was not doing it in any way Giant could see.

Giant stomped hard after Vas, the bridge shaking with each step. Vas turned and used his remaining tentacle limbs, shot straight up into the air with extreme force. Giant followed, knowing that the key would tumble out of their grasp should they both land, and he would win.

Vas turned and his plant tentacles latched onto his foe suddenly. Giant was so surprised that he didn’t react in time as Vas slithered around Giant’s body and onto his back.

“As my master would say: ‘You’ve fallen into my grasp for the next hundred years. Cry for me.’,” Vas stated pleasantly and with that, he began to spin them backwards, causing them both to dive towards the bridge, head first.

“But the key!” Giant yelled as he tried to break free, flexing with all his might.

“The challenge is that no one can step on the bridge but one. However, if there is no bridge, then they can rush for the key before it falls, no?” Vas added as the bridge rushed towards them, dizzyingly fast.

They smashed into the bridge and it reacted explosively, the edges and railings ascending as the impact crater caused the bridge to fold in on itself.

Giant closed his eyes as the mist rushed past, his head ached, but his skull was tough. He could just barely see the key being thrown high into the air as the roots let go. The sight of Deo leaping the distance and catching it made Giant sigh. He turned as Vas let him go. The golem looked sad, as if his part in the journey had come to an end.

“Well fought.” Giant praised and grabbed one of the golem’s arms. He twisted his body around and threw the golem back up the valley and high enough to be caught by the cheerful, redheaded boy, Deo.

Giant smiled as the mist gave off the scream of someone named Wilhelm – (or so Mother said).

The river, his second home, caught him, resulting in a huge splash. He floated to the surface and let himself be carried along for a time. Just enjoying the cool water and the mist. What a fight... Giant could only hope all of them would be so grand.

The bridge would regenerate and rebuild itself, Giant had no worries there.

He bobbed along for some time before he saw a figure in the mist. A dark foreboding shape gently pushing his barge along the dark river.

Like the spectre of a ferryman coming for a lost soul.

“Delta’s river rescue service at your service. My name is Rale, do you have any allergies or injuries that needs to be addressing?” called the cheerful buff frog pushing a log along with his trident.

“Rale... I’m a frog. I can swim,” Giant sighed as his peace was disturbed. Rale huffed.

“I was hoping to rescue some humans, but you had to be a nice guy... ah well, climb on. We can play some poker with the crabs, They’re in the lead with 29 wins, but I think we might finally understand the rules soon!” Rale said brightly.

Giant just snorted and sat on the log as Rale hummed like a romantic boat driver, pushing them back towards the waterfall.

---

“Explain why... I threw up this... thing?” Wyin asked, voice ever so gentle. Delta scuffed her feet on the grass around the dryad tree.

“I accidently ra... you...science...” Delta mumbled. Wyin pursed her lips and pointed with one of her thorny branches.

“I just orally projectiled a mushroom,” she pressed. Delta eyed the now rooted shroom. It was... a weird looking thing.

The Gutrot/Wyin Hybrid was an odd duck at first glance. The pale brown cap looked swirly like varnished wood. The stalk was bright red with leaves hanging off it at random intervals. The scent was... like perfume. A faint floral thing.

It was a very pretty mushroom, but... like Wyin, the beautiful appearance hid a darker nature.

Delta ordered one of her blood rabbits to poke it again and the thing unfolded.

From the tip of the cap, two thin coils of barbed thorns whipped out, unleashed like some claymore mine, spinning to garrote anything that walked past. Delta was glad the bunny moved fast before the grass, the soil, and even the air was punished cruelly by this mushroom as it lanced out with its whips and its thorns rocketed off like shrapnel. Wyin blinked as her own wooden form easily deflected the projectiles.

“It’s called ‘Wyin’s Temptation’. I want my name on this thing now!” Wyin said, voice eager.

Delta stared at her. Wyin looked dainty and feigned innocence.

“It is my mushroom child,” she reminded Delta. Delta rolled her eyes.

“You’re going to be happy then. There’s literally like 30 different combinations with your name on it,” Delta pulled up her list. In fact, the list included Maestro, Mushy, Missy, and even let Delta combine things she recently found in the laboratory.

Slime Mushrooms... Delta could make slime mushrooms for chaos’s sake!

The issue was that the production time for them all would take forever, Delta had no idea how to filter out what would potentially make the most impactful combo on skeletons...

“What eats dead things and bone really well?” Delta mused aloud as she paced. Wyin spoke up, distracted as she played with her new child.

“Men,” she commented. Delta paused, turned, and eyed her flatly. Wyin coughed.

“Pigs, I mean... pigs eat almost anything,” she clarified. Delta opened her menu and scrolled.

Sure enough.

Boary and Bacon were listed as potential parents.

Piggy-shrooms?

Two unholy eating forces of the fungus and animal kingdoms combined? Delta decided that if she was going to beat up an undead child, she might as well do it while riding a pig mushroom to war.

She began to make her hungry hungry army.