The Simulacrum

"The ninja maids are really into the holiday season, huh?" I spoke softly, just loud enough for the girls to hear.

"Christmas is just a few weeks away," Elly told me as she nuzzled closer to me, her arm already entwined with mine as we walked the morning streets. Judy, on my other side, let out a small huff.

"If you keep using that term, don't be surprised when your actual, non-theoretical ninjas misunderstand you and start dressing accordingly."

"In my defense, the ninja maid hypothesis came way before Kage clan showed up on our doorsteps, but it scares me that I can't deny the possibility of what you just said."

In the meantime, Elly let out a soft giggle, and when I glanced at her, she hastily explained, "Sorry, I just imagined Rinne in a maid outfit, and it gave me a chuckle."

"Don't jinx it," my other girlfriend warned her with a tiny frown. "We mustn't let the others learn about the Chief's maid fetish, or he might be tempted."

Now, I could once again point out that I definitely didn't have that, but I knew that she was just trying to push my buttons, so I pointedly looked away and ignored my dear assistant in favor of drinking in the scenery.

It was still early in the morning, so it was fairly dark outside, but that only made all the lights and decorations pop even more. There were blue and yellow Christmas street lights in the shapes of shooting stars on every lamp post, the fronts of most buildings were covered with twinkle lights, garlands, and wreaths, and there was even a life-size Santa Claus statue at the street corner. This wouldn't have been all that surprising, except for the fact that all of these appeared literally overnight. It's all thanks to the night-shift ninja maids, I tell you.

"Should we also start decorating?" Snowy chimed in, and I looked over my shoulder to glance at her. Since my girlfriends already reserved my sides, as usual, she walked behind us, which was our customary formation when going to school as of late.

"I don't know. Isn't it a little early?"

"Tell that to my mom," Judy grumbled. "She put up the holiday decorations in the middle of November." She paused, recalling something, and she tugged on my shoulder to get my full attention. "Speaking of mom, she told me to extend a dinner invitation to you."

"When?"

"Friday," she told me a tad wearily and added, "Dad just learned we're going out, so it's non-negotiable."

"Am I also invited?" Elly chimed in, and my dearest assistant let out a weird noise in response, so I came to the rescue.

"Judy's dad is a little overprotective, so we might have a hard time just getting me accepted. Let's leave the polyfidelity talk for another occasion."

After some consideration, Elly nodded, though she was obviously a little disappointed, considering she wanted to introduce herself to Judy's family for a while now. Thankfully, she understood that rushing this was counter-intuitive, and after a long beat of silence, Snowy broke the ice by tugging on the back of my coat.

"Yes, sis?"

"So… I was still thinking about the decorations. Do we have any at home?"

"That's actually a good question," I murmured, but then shrugged. Knowing my house's track record, I wouldn't be surprised if we had an entire pile of the things tucked away somewhere in plain sight, but just to be sure, I answered, "Let's check around first, but in case we don't, we could always just go and buy some."

I'd have to go on a shopping spree soon anyway, as I had to prepare gifts for a whole lot of people, but since Snowy was on the receiving end as well, I'd obviously have to do that one without her. Still, going to the local shopping center together, especially now that the place was undoubtedly covered in festive decorations, sounded like a nice group outing. A date even, depending on the company.

On a related note, I couldn't help but notice how insistent my sister was about this topic, so I inquired, "Did you also have Christmas in the Abyss?"

"Hm? Oh, no, not really. The only holiday we had was Emperor's Day, but it doesn't have any garlands or gifts."

"Is it a national holiday? Like a founding day?" Judy inquired, and my sister gave it quite the consideration.

"It's something like that, but it's complicated. It's less about celebrations and more... uuu... I want to say it nicer, but it's really more about everyone coming together, fasting, and swearing vengeance."

"On whom?" came the next question, this time from the princess.

"Mostly... um... Everyone, I think?" Snowy told us, and then she whispered, "It's not a fun holiday."

"Based on what you said, I think I prefer Christmas," I commented, and her face lit up at once.

"Me too! It's so much more colorful, and I really like the ornaments! Oh, and the Christmas trees! I always wanted to make one!"

"Well, then I guess we'll have to buy a really big one for your first time," I jested.

"Um... I'm okay with a medium-size one," Snowy responded while making weird gestures with her hands, like she was showing how big of a fish she caught, drawing a light chuckle out of me.

We kept discussing our decoration plans until we reached the school gates, and as we crossed the threshold, I was suddenly hit with a strange sensation, like something was missing. Or rather, someone.

"Where's Josh and Angie?" the princess voiced my thoughts as she craned her neck, and so I Far Glanced around until I found them.

"Oh, they're already in the school."

"That's unusual," Judy noted and glanced at her phone. "We're already a little early."

"Eh, they probably had an 'event' or something," I said with a shrug. "We can ask them once we're inside."

"I second that! It's cold out here!" Elly added and doubled her pace, pulling me along.

Oddly enough, the entrance hall was also unusually deserted, with only a few placeholders loitering around the shoe lockers. On the other hand, there was quite an audible commotion on the first floor, so after changing our shoes, we all made our way up. It didn't take a detective in a deerstalker hat to figure out the cause of the bustle, as the crowd piled up in front of the large notice board near the stairwell was hard to miss.

"Oh, hi everyone," Ammy greeted us from the mass of placeholders when our eyes met, and she carefully pushed her way through to come over to us.

"Morning, class rep," I greeted her back and gestured towards the clot of placeholders with my head. "What's this all about?"

"The exam results came out," she told us like it was obvious, but seeing our confused expressions, she soon resolved herself to explain in detail. "After the exam period is over, and all the papers are assessed, the results are put up on the notice board."

"For everyone?" Snowy blurted out in surprise, sounding a little apprehensive, but Ammy shook her head.

"No, of course not. Only the top ten students of each grade. It's something of an honor, so everyone is curious if they made it onto the list." She paused here and, after sending a glance at Judy, she sheepishly added, "I've got the second place this time."

"Really? Congrats. Who's number one?"

Hearing my question, she stepped aside and pointed at the crowd behind her.

"See for yourself."

Honestly speaking, I probably could if I squinted hard enough, considering I was about a head taller than everyone in front of me, but that didn't really help the girls. As such, I handed my bag over to my sister, rolled up my sleeves, and loudly declared, "Ice-breaker coming through! Make way!"

I didn't get too much of a reaction from the placeholders at first, so I drilled my way into the crowd, the girls following behind me in a single line. I've got a few annoying glances here and there, but I didn't let them stop us, and we soon made it. Standing right in front of the notice board, and pushed a few more people around to make space for the girls, and only then did I take a look myself.

"Oh, look at that!" I exclaimed as my hand lightly landed on top of Judy's head, more or less by reflex. "You're number one in our year, Dormouse. Congratulations!"

She responded with a curt 'Thanks' and she awkwardly escaped my head-rubs, probably feeling bashful due to all the eyes surrounding us.

"Congratulations!" Elly echoed me, but her eyes were still scanning the notice board even as she spoke. All of a sudden, she raised a finger and exclaimed, "Look, I also made it! Number five!"

"That's also pretty respectable," I told her and tousled her hair in turn, eliciting a couple of giggles.

"What about you, sis?" I turned to Snowy next, but she shook her head. "Oh well. Don't feel too down. It's not a big deal at all."

She nodded along, and true to form, she didn't seem to care too much. Considering she transferred late, and that her education in the Abyss was spotty at best due to her dick of a brother keeping her down, I was perfectly happy so long as she didn't fail any of her subjects. Not to mention, even if she did, the midterms were mostly meaningless anyway. That said, since I already rubbed my girlfriends' noggins, it was only fair that she would also get a customary big-brotherly head pat. She found it a little embarrassing, but didn't complain.

"B-Brother! What are you doing!? You're in public!" a new voice called out to us, and when I turned in the direction, I was met with a pair of bright green eyes glaring at me between the shifting crowds.

"I don't see any problem with that," I told her and gestured for her to come over. My provisional sister (I still wasn't entirely sure how to treat her) was reluctant, but at long last, she made her way to us, though she remained tense as a piano wire. I couldn't necessarily fault her, as she was still acclimating to Elly and Snowy, but the way she conspicuously avoided even looking their way was just a tad melodramatic.

"The fact you can say that with a straight face is a huge problem," the red-headed knightess grumbled as she came to a stop by my side. "People are going to think you're flirting in the open."

"She's not wrong, you know?" Judy chimed in, but I didn't react to her comment.

"I wasn't though, and even if I was, what's wrong about flirting with my girlfriends?"

"Erm… right. You are dating them both. I still can't get used to that," Penny murmured, but then her brows descended into a frown and she pointed at my other sister, whose head I was still rubbing even as we spoke. "But what about her?"

"She's family. Since when's showing affection to one's family outlawed around here?"

"It's not, it's just… Ugh… You're incorrigible!" she fumed with her cheeks puffed out, once again reminding me of how the princess used to act in the past. It brought back some fun memories, but it also tickled my teasing instincts a little.

"Oh, I get it now!" I exclaimed and theatrically lifted my hand off Snowy's head. "You were feeling left out, and that's why you're so grumpy so early in the morning." At this point, I flexed my fingers, and flashed her the most big-brotherliest grin I ever big-brothered, and she instantly figured out what I was about to do.

"Eeeeep!"

And just like that, she dashed away like I was about to eat her or something, knocking a bunch of placeholders away, and opening up a gap in the crowd in the process. I was about to turn back to the notice board, but before the hole in the circle around us could close, someone familiar took advantage of it and replaced Penny in the blink of an eye.

"Wow! Like, what the heck is wrong with everyone this morning?" Sahi started complaining the moment she came to a halt, but then she straightened her uniform and flashed us a huge grin. "Hi, guys!"

"Hello," Snowy greeted her back, followed by the girls.

The brown girl let out a silly giggle and put her hands on her hips. By now she was fully accustomed to both her younger body and her environment. In fact, with her braided hair, makeup, and the plethora of sparkly accessories she had on her bag, she was a blonde dye-job away from becoming a gyaru archetype. Speaking of which, did gyaru girls use surfer lingo? Probably not, considering it was a Japanese thing, but by this point I wouldn't be surprised.

"So, like, what's the deal with the redhead?"

"Just some brotherly teasing, nothing serious," I told her, at which point she cocked her head to the side.

"Oh, right. She's, like, also your sister, huh?"

"More or less," I said with a shrug, and I could see a familiar, impish glint in her eyes.

"Hey, can I also become your little sister? Like, where's a place for two, there's a place for three, right?"

I sent the ex-Arch-mage a disparaging look, but she only kept fluttering her eyelashes at me.

"I'm not going to adopt you," I told her flatly, and she responded with a long string of throaty giggles.

"Just kidding, just kidding!" She wiped the corner of her eyes, with the back of her hand, and then cleared her throat. "So, like, how did you guys do on the exams?"

"Judy got first place," Elly answered her in my stead. "I'm fifth!"

"Really? That's wicked! Like, I'm not even sure I passed all my tests… Not that it matters, but it, like, hurts my self-esteem? Just a little."

"To be fair, it's not like these exam results really mean anything to us," I noted, only to get poked in the side by my dearest assistant. "Ow! Hey!"

"Chief, we're already over this: don't overlook your grades just because you're rich."

"I'm not!" I protested as I rubbed my side, though as usual, it was just an elaborate act. Judy was as bad at inflicting physical violence as usual. "I'm just saying that Sahi won't really be affected by her grades, since she works with Lord Grandpa already, and she might even get her old position back with time."

"That's right," the subject of our conversation nodded thoughtfully and even raised a finger to her lips. "Like, I'm mostly just here because I never got to go to school the first time. It's, like, totally unnecessary, but it's kinda fun, so I'll keep attending until the novelty wears off."

"You see, Dormouse? Even she says that—"

"Hold it right there, traitor!"

My words were abruptly cut off by an angry shout, and the sea of placeholders once again parted as someone came over to us, stomping her feet each step on the way.

"Wha—?"

The obvious question never left my mouth, as I was roughly grabbed by the collar and pulled down. Well, okay, technically I was the one who leaned over, but same difference.

"How could you do this to us?" a certain friendly neighborhood Celestial hissed right into my face and she shook me, though it once again required my assistance.

"Could you be a little more specific?" I asked back while maintaining a deadpan façade, ever while Angie was shaking me back and forth, her face a mixture of outrage, grief, and indignation. Not necessarily in that order, and not particularly convincing either.

"You were supposed to be one of us! Our comrade in arms! Our leader! How could you betray the dum-dum club like that!?"

"The what?" Elly blurted out in my stead, earning her Angie's attention in the process.

"This has nothing to do with you! Your kind has no right to meddle in the affairs of the hopeless!"

It was around this point that Josh also managed to elbow his way through the wall of students as well, and he followed it up with an exasperated grimace.

"Angie, you're going overboard."

"Don't you defend him!" the Celestial girl scoffed, and shook me again, for good measure. "We of the dum-dum brotherhood are supposed to be a close-knit clique! Closer than family! How could you betray us like that?"

It was around this time that I figured out this skit was going nowhere fast, so I grabbed hold of Angie's shoulders.

"Okay, time out. Before we go any further, could any of you explain what she's talking about?"

"We're talking about how you betrayed our dum-dum alliance," she grumbled, so I turned to her childhood friend, hoping for a more reasonable answer.

"She's mad at you because you made it onto the list," Josh told me, and even he sounded disapproving of it.

"Wait, I did?" I turned around and skimmed the notice board again, and my eyes opened wide. "Holy crap, guys! I actually got the tenth spot."

"Really?" Elly exclaimed after me and scrutinized the board as well. "Look, Judy! It's there! Leo's name is really there!"

"I saw at first glance," my other girlfriend uttered in a tired tone. "I was waiting for you to notice it on your own."

"If you noticed, then why did you heckle me about school performance just now?"

"On principle," Judy told me with a straight face, followed by a simple, "Congratulations, Chief."

"Well, th—"

"You were supposed to be one of uuus!" Angie cut me off again. "How could you do this to us, Leooo? Hooow?"

"All right, I think that's about enough," Josh grumbled as he peeled the overdramatic Celesial off my collar.

Honestly, I was quite flabbergasted at the moment. Sure, the tenth place meant I barely qualified, but I never expected to do so at all. I've studied quite a bit to catch up to our curriculum, and I've done my best during our group cramming sessions, but I didn't think I did that well.

"Wow. So, like, you're the type that's totally smarter than they look, huh?" Sahi chimed in.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

She stuck out her tongue in response, but before I could say anything to her, Angie drew my attention again by letting out a hoarse groan and slumping her shoulders in defeat.

"It's over! Having Ammy around was bad enough, but now that Judy, Elly, and even Leo made it to the honor list, I'll never hear the end of it! Mom's gonna kill me…" At this moment, our eyes met, and she pointed an accusing finger at me. "You! If only you did a little worse, then I could point at you, but I can't even do that now!"

"How would that even help you?" the previously silent Ammy asked with one hand on her glasses, on the border of going into full-blown authority mode at any moment.

"Right," I added in a hurry. "Also, if you really want to point at someone, there's always Josh, isn't there?"

"That's no use! Nobody expects him to do any better!"

It was at this point that Josh slowly shook his head and grabbed his childhood pal by the scuff of her neck.

"Sorry about this. She's just suffering from post-exam stress syndrome. Should be back to normal in a couple of days."

"Unhand me, collaborator!"

"Stop making a scene! Just come along for now. I'll treat you to a soda or something."

The Celestial girl's mood switched so abruptly, it only needed a record scratch sound effect, and she glanced over to him with the world, "Can I get raspberry?"

"Sure," Josh conceded, and the two of them soon disappeared into the crowd.

"Wow," Sahi broke the non-silence (considering the background noise) and turned to me. "Those two are, like, totally close."

"Well, they are childhood friends," I pointed out, but she shook her head at once.

"Nah, it's more, like, they're totally close."

"You just said that."

"No, the second time I meant totally totally!" she argued back, and I figured there was no point getting trapped in her pace.

As such, since classes were about to start, and we've already read the notice board, I gestured for the girls to follow after me, and we dug our way out of the crowd. Once in the open, we bid a not at all teary farewell to the incognito ex-Arch-mage, Judy and Elly went to the restroom, and I accompanied Snowy to her classroom before I headed for the second floor. Maybe because the placeholder classmates were still gawking at the list, only a few of them lingered in the classroom, plus Ammy, who somehow got here ahead of me.

I took a deep breath and made my way over to my desk. Sitting down, I couldn't help but reminisce about the first time I came here. It's been three months since then, but it felt like it was only yesterday… yet at the same time, it also felt like it's been years. It was quite a peculiar feeling, but understandable.

A lot of things happened in this short time. Amnesia and Chimeras, giant robots and mad scientists, highly visible ninjas and foxy mikos, talking swords and dastardly knights… So many weird things happened to me in such a short time, and I didn't even count stuff like my relationship with the girls. I couldn't help but wonder; will my life ever become simple, or was I doomed to live a life of constant headaches and complications?

While I was thinking so, our classmates returned to the room one by one, signaling that the lessons were about to start. Oddly enough, Angie came back alone, and her body language said she was furious about something. I didn't have to wait for long to find out why, as not much after her arrival, Josh also walked in and sat down behind me with a lethargic groan.

"Hey, buddy?" I called out to get his attention and turned around in my seat. "I have a feeling that you have a tale to tell." He only gave me a wry look, so I ventured a guess. "Angie?"

"Yeah," he griped and rubbed his face. "Also, the new girl."

"Which one? Penny?"

"Yeah," he answered, the word turning into a drawn-out sigh by the end.

"So? Do you want to talk about it?"

"Maybe after classes," he answered after thinking, then added, "I know I've already said this before, but man, girls are weird."

Shaking my head, I turned around to face the blackboard, and soon came to the conclusion that as hectic and annoying my life could be at times, I could always take solace in the fact that at least I wasn't a harem protagonist.

"And remember children: the most important part of the school festival is fun!" Mrs. Applebottom exclaimed with an unusually energetic smile, and the classroom nodded along. Well, most of the class. Our little group was already neck-deep in the preparations, so we all had our own opinions about her trite advice, while at least one of the four creepy amigos was too busy swooning to give any other reaction.

Then, like clockwork, the last chime of the day sounded, ending our homeroom class, yet contrary to my expectations, the teacher remained at her desk. That was odd, considering how uncannily punctual she was, and soon she cleared her throat and added, "Also, I know you're excited about your concert, but please make sure you all do your part and support our performers. Don't leave everything up to Leonard and the singers."

Our usually vacant classmates remained oddly silent at first, but soon they began to voice their agreement one by one. Mrs. Applebottom smiled again, stood up, and left the classroom without any further words.

"That was odd," Judy noted as she arrived at my desk less than a second after the teacher was out of sight.

"A little," I answered as I packed my bag. "The progress is slow, but things are definitely evolving."

"You mean the place—" Elly spoke up as she looked over her shoulder, but caught herself before she finished the last word, and after conspicuously glancing around, she corrected herself by saying, "— I mean, the classmates, right?"

"Among other things," I confirmed, and we left it at that.

In the meantime, Josh also finished packing and called out to me.

"So, do you guys have any plans for the afternoon?"

"We'll have our measurements taken for the costumes," Elly told him, and the guy's eyes lit up with recognition.

"Ah, right. You mentioned that during lunch."

"I'm also going," Judy noted, and when I raised a brow at her, she added, "We'll have a rehearsal first, and I'm in charge of the audio equipment."

"Do you need help?" I offered, but she shook her head.

"Everything should be in the storeroom where we left it."

"Now that you mention that," Josh interjected, with his bag already on his back. "Are we going to hold the concert in the classroom?"

"Right, you weren't there during the last practice session," I said after rising to my feet as well. "We're expecting a bit of a crowd, so I ever so nicely asked the principal if we could have the gym for the day, and he happily agreed.

"Oh, so that's why grandfather was so irritated yesterday," Ammy commented out of the blue, appearing from my blind spot as usual. At this point, I had to wonder if her ability to sneak up on people like that was a natural quirk of hers, or possibly a homunculus thing. I mean, I still had absolutely no idea about what it meant to be a homunculus, so it might as well give her secret presence-hiding powers or something.

More importantly, she was also ready to go, and after adjusting her glasses, she gave me a reproachful frown and warned me, "Please don't impose on grandfather more than necessary. He's already high-strung due to all the recent incidents."

"I know, I know. I was perfectly polite. Gentlemanly, even."

"Chief, we both know what that means by your standards," Judy took a jab at me, and I turned a pair of incredulous eyes at her.

"What are you saying, Dormouse! Aren't I the very model of a modern major gentleman?"

She considered my words, and then replied, "Depends. Is it a one-to-forty-eight, or a one-to-seventy-two scale model?"

I was going for more of a 'Gillbert and Sullival' kind of skit, but decided to take her response and run with it anyway.

"Oh, come on, Dormouse! I'm at worst a one-to-eight scale," I moaned, and she scoffed at me in return.

"Not a chance. Isn't that right, Elly?"

My other girlfriend blinked at us, and then sheepishly admitted, "Oh, sorry, I was a little distracted just now." She didn't wait for us to respond, but instead she posed the question, "Hey, so, I was wondering. If a model is a one-to-one scale, is it still a model?"

"Depends," my dear assistant pivoted on the spot without batting an eye. "Mannequins are one-to-one scale, and they are still models."

"Are they?" the princess asked back with a skeptical look on her face, so I also pivoted and backed Judy up.

"Of course they are. They're the normal models, while the people on the catwalks are the superior models."

"That's why they are called 'super-models'," Judy doubled down with me, and the princess nodded along.

"But if the super-models are one-to-one scale models, who are they modeled after?" Elly threw us a curveball, and we shared an uncertain glance.

"Platonic ideals?" I ventured a guess, and Judy nodded along.

"I'm sorry for doubting you, Chief. You are indeed a modern major gentleman. You've information practical, abstract, and philosophical."

"Oh, now you try to do the 'Modern Major General' spoof!" I complained aloud, and my dearest assistant's cheeks actually flushed a little, which was a rare, and correspondingly precious, sight. My other girlfriend, on the other hand, let out a soft gasp and snapped her finger.

"So that's what you were doing! I love that song! Dad used to sing it when I was little."

"It's also hard to improvise new verses for it on the spot," my other girlfriend grumbled, so I lightly patted her on the back as a peace offering.

"Do you think they're done?" Josh whispered on the side, and Ammy shrugged her shoulders.

"Your guess is as good as mine," she told him, prompting him to look us over one more time.

"I think they're probably finished with their thing," he whispered, and cleared his throat to get our attention. "So, putting all that aside, we were talking about the concert, right?"

"Yes," I responded, turning away from the girls. By the sound of it, they were trying to come up with new lyrics to the song, so I tried to ignore them. That way, I wouldn't ruin the surprise.

"So, I was wondering, but are we going to have a stage?" Josh inquired, and the question immediately perked Ammy's ears.

"You want to have a stage? In the gym?"

"I don't want to, I was just curious if Leo had any plans about it," he answered in a hurry, and I sent him a skeptical glance at one.

"Why would I?"

"Idunno. You're the one who always overdoes things, so I figured you'd just buy a stage. And some lights. Plus maybe a fog machine or two."

I raised the intensity of my skepticism by a notch and asked, "You put a lot of thought into this, didn't you? Are you trying to use some sort of reverse-psychology trick on us?"

Before he could answer, Elly interrupted us by exclaiming, "Wait, that's actually a great idea! I could ask dad if we could borrow some stage props!"

"That sounds nice in theory, but the concert is going to be indoors," I pointed out, but it didn't faze the princess the slightest.

"Don't worry, these things are modular. You can disassemble and reassemble them in the gymnasium. Oh, and the boys could even help with moving the parts and setting things up!"

"Wait, what do you mean by that?" Josh blurted out in alarm.

"I don't think there's a way you can misunderstand what she said," I commented on the side.

In the meantime, Elly got up and declared, "I'll call dad."

"Do it after the rehearsal," Judy cut in and showed her phone to the princess.

"You're right. He might be busy right now anyway." She paused here and looked around. "Where's Angie?"

"She said she had to go to the toilet," said the class rep. "She told me she'd meet us in the gym."

"Then we should get going," my dearest assistant stressed as she pocketed her phone, and soon the girls left the classroom, though only after the customary goodbyes and kisses. By this time the rest of our classmates also left, so it was just me and a slightly sullen Josh.

"Well, I guess it's just the two of us."

"Yeah," he spoke with a sigh and gestured for me to get moving.

It wasn't until we already changed shoes and were just about to leave the main building when my friends spoke up again.

"Man, I really should've watched my mouth," he spoke softly, and a sigh later he added, "At this rate, my school festival plans are as good as busted."

"You had plans?"

"Yeah, obviously?" he jabbed back with a roll of his eye. "I mean, not big plans, but if Elly can really get us a stage and we'll have to put it together…" This time he let out a frustrated grunt and moaned, "I mean, come on, man! I'm not even qualified to be a stage crew! What if I break something?"

"You made your bed, pal. Now you have to lie in it," I jested, and he gave me an annoyed look in return.

"Don't talk like it's none of your business. Last I checked, you're one of the boys too."

"Yes, but I'm also the manager," I pointed out.

"Ah, damn. You're right…" he muttered, but then his face lit up with a new idea. "Hey, Leo? Can you ask the big guys for help? They like building stuff."

"True, but they are busy with expanding the base," I responded, and his shoulders slouched in disappointment.

"Oh, come on, man! Can't you at least ask them? Maybe they'll even offer their help. I mean, they always looked like they had fun when they were building or tinkering, right?"

As much as I wanted to deny Josh's plea, he wasn't entirely wrong about that last part. Snowy's Faun retainers always had a knack for construction work, which was already strange for a group of magically engineered proud warrior race guys, but as of late, they've started pursuing some outright artistic endeavors. Karukk borrowed a lathe machine from Fred to make a knife handle, but since then he began to use it for woodturning, and he made multiple vases and other small decorations from scrap materials. Brang took up metalworking, and he's been making fancy swords, knives, and other tools with Galatea. Hrul turned out to be a talented wood-carver, and he made his own noh theater mask for the ninja disguise, and as for Pip… Well, he started sculpting, but somehow he seemed to be getting worse at it over time. He claimed he's just exploring impressionism, but I had a feeling that if he kept it up, he'd soon start arranging old chairs into a stack and call it a Dadaist artwork about consumerism or something.

Considering this sudden outburst of creativity came right after Snowy got her new drawing board, I had a sneaking suspicion that she might've been the reason behind it, but it really didn't matter either way. The Fauns' new hobbies didn't really interfere with their main job, and what they did in their free time was none of my business. That said, I had a feeling that if I asked them, they might just jump at the opportunity to work on the stage. However…

"Sorry pal, but it's not going to happen. We're on School grounds. There's no way I can bring in a brigade of Fauns without any of the guys underground noticing."

"Well, damn," Josh grumbled and let out yet another absurdly overdramatic sigh. "That's it. My school festival plans are officially ruined, and it's my own fault."

"Stop being so melodramatic."

"I'm not," he muttered in a sullen voice.

I sent him a sideways glance, but he remained silent, so I resolved myself to just come out and ask what his deal was.

"Seriously now. What kind of plans did you have? You're talking about this like the school festival was supposed to change your life or something."

"Erm… No. I mean, I don't think so, but… I still wanted to do a few important things."

"Such as?" I urged him, and this time he was the one who gave me an annoyed look.

"Come on, man. We already talked about what the school festival is all about."

"Food stalls, class productions, and parents coming to visit?"

"No, not those things." He paused to see if I would figure it out, but when I remained completely confused, he blurted out, "Girls, man. You're supposed to go around the festival with a girl. It's tradition."

"… Okay, I wasn't expecting that," I admitted with just a hint of interest. "Do you have someone in mind?"

"Erm… Umm…" Josh hesitated for quite a while, but when we reached a crossing and had to stop at the light, he finally resolved himself. "We talked about how Angie might like me, right? I mean, like me more than a friend, right?" I nodded along, and so he explained, "I was kinda planning to invite her along and… you know? Visit the stalls, a few classrooms, maybe go to the rooftop to watch the fireworks, and see how things would go. I mean, I don't expect anything to happen, but if something would happen, it would be the time for it to happen, so we'll see if it happens or not."

"Calm down, buddy. You're starting to talk in circles," I told him, and made a mental note about that rooftop firework thing, as it sounded like a neat thing to watch with the girls. More importantly, I considered Josh's words, and couldn't help but note, "So you want to test the waters with Angie? Aren't you two in a cold war right now?"

"Nah. I told you, she's just grouchy because of the exams. She'll get better in a few days. It also didn't help that it's that time of the month for her. It just makes her extra-touchy."

"… You keep track of Angie's period?"

"What? No! I mean, kinda, but not on purpose!" he denied my question like it was some kind of grand accusation. "I mean, we've known each other for ages. I just kinda figured out the pattern over time. There's nothing weird about that."

"I never said so," I told him, and we both left it at that.

That said, this development kind of took me aback. As far as I was concerned, this was the first proactive idea this guy had, at least when it came to his love life. This was a development that required attention. After all, if our hypotheses about the Simulacrum running on mainly battle harem tropes was on the money, Josh getting together with any of the girls would definitely make some waves in the Narrative. It might even trigger one of those 'routes' Judy was so hell-bent about, and lead to some unexpected developments. Heck, we might even avoid that potential tournament arc I've heard about in my latest fever dream.

But let's not get ahead ourselves. It's Josh and Angie we were talking about here. Honestly, as much as the two of them suited each other, she wasn't exactly the most viable candidate out of Josh's entourage. As a matter of fact, she was the least likely, simply because, in any kind of harem narrative, the childhood friend always loses. I had no idea why; you'd think that when it came to the relationship tug-of-war, the love interest who's been with the protagonist the longest would have an enormous head-start, yet statistically speaking, they were pretty much guaranteed to lose them to some brand new transfer student, or some long-forgotten girl from the protagonist childhood, or just your run of the mill tsundere turning lovey-dovey over time. And yes, I know just described the princess, and it wasn't a coincidence.

Not that there were many horses in the race anymore. Besides Angie, we only had Snowy, who seemed to care very little about romance as of late, and potentially Penny, but they got along with Josh about as well as oil and water, so anything was possible. I figured I might as well sit back and watch the situation unfold.

"Listen, Josh," I called out to my glum fiend, and once I had my attention, I told him, "I think you're being too negative about this whole stage thing. It's not guaranteed that Abram could just get one on short notice, and even if he did, it doesn't mean you'd have to spend the whole day assembling it. Not to mention, Angie's in the group, so even if you wanted to invite her, you'd have to do it after the performance was over anyway."

"Wouldn't we have to disassemble the stage?"

"Obviously not right after the concert was over," I told him in the company of a subtle roll of my eyes. "Seriously, dude, don't overthink this. Just ask her out on a date, and the rest of us will cover for you."

"It won't be a date," he objected, and when I frowned at him, he hastily explained, "I mean, it's just to see how she'd react, and we've already done some food stand hopping last year, so it's not even that special. What did we call these things? Outings?"

"No. When you invite a girl specifically to have a romantic time and see if you two would move your relationship forward, that's a date by definition."

"Oh, maaan…"

I let my friend mull over that, and a few short minutes of walking later we reached the usual intersection where we'd part ways. I checked the time, and seeing that there's still a couple of hours until my next appointment, I asked, "Do you want to grab something to eat? We could hit up the arcade too."

"Nah, not in the mood," he grumbled. "I also don't want to run into Pascal and Sahi again."

"I think that time was just a fluke."

He didn't seem particularly convinced, and to be honest, I wouldn't have been either. I mean, how could we predict that we'd run into those two the last time we visited the place? Not only that, the ex-Arch-mage challenged us to a Street Kombat tag-team fight, and it wasn't pretty. I'd like to say it was probably because Josh still had some lingering trauma from Sahi's presence and couldn't concentrate, but Armband Guy was just a straight-up monster, and he would've probably beaten both of us with one health bar. As for what those two were even doing in the arcade, I had no idea. Or rather, I had an idea, but it was too silly to consider.

"I still pass," Josh decided and exhaled a pent-up breath. "I need to practice first before I'm willing to set foot in there again. See ya tomorrow, I suppose."

With that said, he bid me farewell and walked down the road leading into his neighborhood. Wow. The guy was really out of it, wasn't he? He even completely skipped over the food part of my invitation. I considered calling after him, but seeing how he was busy mulling things over, I figured I should let him sort out his thoughts alone, and I also began walking.

To be honest, Josh wasn't the only one feeling slightly vary about the upcoming school festival. Or rather, it was what came after that. The Christmas ball. The part where I'd have to pick a dance partner for the evening was already a tricky one, but one that I could manage by hopping between the girls. The real problem was what came after that, and it made me uncharacteristically fretful. I just really, really hoped I won't mess things up. Our relationship has already settled into a really cozy and fun status quo, and so I really didn't want to upset everything by screwing up the… um… screwing part? That didn't come out right…

While I wondered about this, my legs carried me back to our neighborhood. I could've Phased, but some fresh air never hurt anyone, even if it was cold as heck. If the forecast was to be believed, we'll have a white Christmas, but so far I've set to see a single snowflake this year. Well, except the blizzard that Snowy made during the kidnapping incident, but that doesn't count.

So, I just rounded the corner leading into our street, and immediately noticed something peculiar. Or rather, someone. I tall-ish young man wearing a fancy brown felt coat, a plaid scarf, and bright blue mufflers on his ears. More relevantly, said young man was standing right in front of my house and rubbing his hands, occasionally breathing into his palms to keep them warm. He looked up, and the moment our eyes met, his expression lit up and he waved to me, so I made my way over to him with measured steps.

"Hello, Leonard!" the sandy-blonde guy greeted me with a grin partially hidden by his scarf. "Thank Deus you arrived! I thought I was going to freeze to the bone out here!"

Mike, the local Celestial asset, useful Hub regular, and all-around silly person, was looking at me like I was his savior, and I couldn't help but feel a headache coming as I greeted him back.

"Good day, Michael. What brings you to my doorstep?"

"I'm here for business," he told me, and after overtly glancing left, right, and ever over his shoulder, he leaned closer and whispered, "Celestial business."

"I figured."

"Also…" He leaned even closer and lowered his voice another notch before adding, "I also need some help. It's, um… of personal nature."

"I'm listening," I said, even though I had a feeling I really shouldn't.

"Can… can we talk inside? I'm reeeeeeally cold…"

I gave the aspiring Celestial agent a flat look, but he remained entirely serious, so a quick sigh later I gestured for him to follow after me, all the while already preparing myself for either something troublesome, something embarrassing, or potentially both. It was Mike we were talking about, after all…

"Welcome home," Snowy greeted me from the living room the moment I opened the front door. She only had five classes on Mondays, and she had no club activities, so she came home ahead of me as usual. "I ordered Chinese for dinner, and—" She froze mid-sentence when she poked her head around the doorway and noticed the guest behind me. "Oh, hello."

"Hi," Mike greeted her back with an awkward smile, and my sister remained silent for a while.

"Should… I order another portion?"

"No need. Mike's only staying for a short while," I told her while vaguely gesturing in the direction of the self-conscious Celestial still in the process of wordlessly peeling himself out of his coat.

"I see. Do you need any drinks, or…?"

"Nah, we're good," I said while simultaneously signaling with my brows, and it didn't take long for her to get the message.

"Oh, okay then. I'll be in my room. Call me if you need anything."

Saying so, Snowy gracefully pulled back from the doorway, and by the time I changed my footwear, I could already hear her pattering up the stairs. Mike was unusually nervous, so I gestured for him to stop dallying around, and we sat down in the living room.

"Your sister's… not wearing a maid uniform this time," he noted, undoubtedly as a clumsy attempt at small talk.

"It's her hobby, so it's up to her when and why she would dress up," I told him with a shrug.

"Oh, I see," the hapless Celestial nodded along like I just said something profound. "So being a maid is a hobby in the Abyss…" I was about to correct his assumption, but then he glanced around in alarm, kind of like a kid who was just caught with his hand in the cookie jar, and he all but shrunk back in his seat as he asked, "B-By the way, is it true? Is she really a Lord of the Abyss?"

"Technically? No. She's only in the line of succession."

"And you're living under the same roof with her? That's… erm… brave?" he muttered, and I couldn't help but raise a curious brow at him.

"You're talking like you just learned about her background."

"Because I did! I mean, more like yesterday, but…"

His words trailed off again, so I exhaled a shallow sigh and moved the conversation along by directly addressing the elephant in the room.

"You mentioned something about Celestial business, didn't you?"

"Oh, right! That's what I'm here for!" the guy declared with a smile and straightened his back at once. "So, you know how Mister Jaacobah had to leave the island in a hurry, right?" I nodded, but instead of continuing, he sent a conspicuous glance at my hand, and awkwardly cleared his throat. "Speaking of which… errr… How's your hand? Is it healed?"

"Thanks for asking, it's fine." To be honest, it wasn't completely okay, as I've ended up straining it a bit during the duel with Penny. I didn't notice it at the time, and I no longer had any issues with moving my fingers, but according to Cal, I was just a hair's breadth away from injuring myself again. Since the overdramatic sword was the closest thing I had to an expert on this matter, I had no choice but to believe them, so I've been forced to rest my hand in the last couple of days. Of course, Mike didn't need to know this, so I moved on by asking, "What does Jaacobah have to do with your visit?"

"Oh, it's simple, really. Since he had to leave, and I already made some deals with you in the past, I was promoted." He flashed me a proud smile, and declared, "From this day forward, I'm your official contact. If you want to communicate with the Celestial Intelligence Network, I'm your man!"

"Really?" I blurted out in genuine surprise. While I admittedly wasn't nearly as active on the Celestial Hub as I used to be, due to being busy with the base and the new hires and everything, I was sure I would've noticed something like this.

"Certainly!" Mike exclaimed with an even wider grin. "I've even got my assignment in a locked briefcase and all, like a real secret agent. It had all kinds of top-secret intel and everything." He suddenly paused here and glanced up the stairs, then continued in a much more subdued tone. "It's also where I learned that your sister is… You know?"

"I know."

"That's good. I'm glad we're on the same page," he muttered, followed by another glance at the stairs. "You really can't judge a book by its cover." I had a feeling we might not have been on the same page after all, but before I could get a word in, Mike continued with, "To be honest, I never imagined you'd make deals with the Abyssals. You know? Being a Chimera Slayer and all that…"

"What can I say? I'm an equal opportunity information broker."

"I see, I see," he muttered, and after a short beat, he asked, "So, are the Nergals also on the island? I mean, they were the ones who helped you… erm… 'adopt' her, right?"

Oh, look at that. Someone did his homework.

"I'm afraid not." When I said that, my Celestial guest let out a pent-up breath, as if I just took a huge weight off his shoulders. He still looked expectant, so I elaborated, "It was a mutually beneficial arrangement, but soon after that, the Assembly locked down the island, and so they retreated before they'd be caught up in the crossfire."

Of course, there were no Abyssals from house Nergal on the island to begin with; it was just the cover identity I used when dealing with the document forger to get Snowy's ID. The Celestials probably got the info out of the guy, which was just a touch alarming. It meant I was being investigated, which could spell trouble, especially if they started suspecting that I infiltrated the Celestial Hub.

I didn't let the apprehension show on my face though, and Mike accepted my explanation without question.

"That's good to hear. There are way too many Abyssals in Critias for my liking."

"There's only one of them, and she's upstairs," I pointed out, and my guest immediately backpedaled like I just hit him on the nose.

"No no no! I don't mean her, of course! It's the other Abyssals, like that… erm… Bel, I think?" He paused here, apparently recalling something. "By the way, who exactly is this 'Bel' anyway?"

"Didn't the contents of your top-secret suitcase brief you on him?" I teased him a little, and he vehemently shook his head, like I just accused him of some nefarious deed.

"No! I mean, they really gave me intel, and it's really secret, but it had nothing to do with this 'Bel' person." I was just about to ask where he heard the name then, but Mike voluntarily explained by saying, "Before Mister Jaacobah left, he called me on the phone and told me that I should avoid him, but didn't tell me the details. Is he… maybe one of the Nergals?"

I was about to reflexively answer, but I bit back the words before they could leave my mouth and narrowed my eyes. At this point, Mike was already promoted from asset to a full-fledged field agent, so… could it be that he was fishing for information? Honestly, while the guy was about as guileless as they come, I couldn't rule out the possibility, so I ordered my thoughts and slowly shook my head.

"I can't say for sure, but I doubt it. My contact with the Nergal House was brief and solely for business, so I don't know much about them either."

"Ah, that's good. Or rather… it's bad? I-I mean, you really shouldn't make deals with Abyssals, but if you have to, it's better to keep them at arm's length."

"Is that so?" I mused as I scrutinized the suddenly flustered guy. "Why do you think that?"

"It's because they're evil?" he answered with a question, only to realize what he just said and defensively raise his hands. "I-I mean, not all of them, obviously, but… most of them, I think?"

"I would advise against blanket statements like that," I said in a level voice.

"So… you're saying they're not evil?"

"'Evil' is such a silly word." Mike looked at me funny, so I exhaled a sigh and told him, "Have you heard of the idiom, 'Everyone is the hero of their own story'? Most people have their own circumstances and they're trying to do what they consider to be good, or at least the best thing to do at the moment." He was still giving me a confused stare, so I decided to be a bit more direct. "Okay, here's an example. You know that I'm on bad terms with the current Lord of House Inanna, right?"

"Yes. I think everyone knows that."

"So, let's take things from his perspective. I can't look into his head to see his motivations, but I think it's safe to say he probably had some kind of plan in mind when he caused that big ruckus a couple of months ago. To reach his end goal, conspiring, infiltrating a School, kidnapping, and sending assassins to deal with loose variables probably sounded reasonable to him at the time. Something like 'The end justifies the means', I reckon. With all that in mind, would you call him evil?"

"I—"

"Before you answer, I'd like to remind you that you're part of a clandestine arm of a supernatural organization that regularly conspires, infiltrates other organizations, kidnaps people, and occasionally even sends out assassination orders in the name of the greater good."

"I… think I understand what you're trying to say, but… If you don't think he's evil, then why are you opposing him?"

That… was such a naïve question that for a moment I had to pause and silently stare at the guy's mug, just to make sure he wasn't pulling my leg.

"It's because good and evil are irrelevant. He's a threat to me, my friends, and my family, and if he shows his face again, I'll act with that in mind. Morals have nothing to do with it."

It took a while for Mike to digest my words. To be honest though, I wasn't entirely truthful with him, or at least about the reason why I tried to avoid looking at the world through a black and white lens. The real culprit was, as usual, the Narrative.

This world operated on tropes and narrative conventions. One of these was the protagonist/antagonist dichotomy. An engaging plot usually required some kind of conflict, and for conflict to arise, there had to be at least two opposing sides. In our specific case, the problem arose from the fact that the roles were already set in stone the first day I woke up in this Simulacrum thing. In particular, bad guys already had their part designated to them by default.

We talked about this with the girls concerning my potential slide into designated villain territory, but at least one part of Judy's observations was rock solid: I've been, without question, collecting the designated baddies under my wings since the beginning. It wasn't exactly a deliberate plan on my end, but I guess in retrospect I could say that I might've been unconsciously going out of my way to do it. As for the 'why', the reason was quite prosaic: it's because none of it was their fault.

Snowy was literal mind-controlled into kidnapping Josh, the Fauns were just doing their job, Fred was caught up in a conspiracy, Rinne was under the influence of a crazy sword that was under the influence of an enchantment oversight, while the Knights were simply trapped in a blood-feud they couldn't get out of even if they tried. More importantly though, all of them were very obviously set on their collision course with us by the Narrative. In a way, they had their agency taken away for the sake of whatever Plot this Simulacrum world was supposed to play out. Blaming them for their actions would be about as puerile as blaming an actor for playing the bad guy in a movie.

However, I made exactly one exception to this rule. Or, to be more precise, I didn't really make him an exception, but rather instead my normal modus operandi was overridden by more immediate concern. I never blamed Crowey for his role as the bad guy, just like I would not blame a hungry tiger for trying to eat someone. However, if said tiger tried to eat me or my friends, I wouldn't think about whether it was good or evil or had its reasons; if it's a threat, it gets put down. End of story.

Really, the only reason why I restrained myself to only annoying and subtly sabotaging Crowey all this time was because I was afraid that if I crossed the line, it couldn't be taken back. Not just because it would make justifying any such future actions easier, but because it could affect the world in unpredictable ways. The last thing I needed right now was to accidentally cause the Simulacrum to slip into a Cerebus Syndrome.

"So somebody is either a threat or not?"

"That's a very simplified way to put it, but it's not incorrect. I generally try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but if they cross certain lines…" I purposefully paused here, and my guest let out an audible gulp. He was always a bit jumpy, but the way he was reacting to my words was even worse than usual. Anyhow, we went off the track a bit, so I figured it was time I re-railed the conversation. "But enough about my personal moral philosophy. You said you're designated to be my liaison, right? That means your higher-ups expect that I would want to contact them."

"P-Probably, yes?"

I sent the guy a flat stare, which he refused to meet, so I had no choice but to be blunt.

"The Celestial Intelligence Network wouldn't have sent you to my doorstep if they didn't have something in mind. What exactly do they want?"

The newbie Celestial agent remained nervously silent, but he soon cracked under my stare and let out a defeated groan.

"I… was told to ask you something, but after the conversation we just had…"

"Just spit it out. I promise I won't be mad at you."

"Oh, okay." Mike took a deep breath to collect himself and approached the topic from an unexpected angle. "So, I imagine you know that there was a significant Oathbreaker presence on Timaeus. Oh, right, you probably know them as the Brotherhood of the—"

"I'm familiar with your terminology, please continue."

"U-Understood. So, the thing is, we had people monitoring them, but then one night they all just vanished."

"The surveillance team, or the Knights?" I asked to keep up appearances, and he hastily corrected himself.

"I meant the Oathbreakers. Sorry, I should've been more precise. My bad." He took another deep breath to collect himself, then continued with, "When our people investigated the area, they found traces of a Restricted Space, but no signs of battle. It's quite mysterious, really."

"So your bosses want to know if I know where they are now."

"Not really. I-I mean, there was a commotion at the Dracis estate the same night, so it wasn't hard to figure out what happened. The thing that really bothers us is the timing." I raised a brow here, and he hastily clarified, "So, we all know that the Draconians are about to hold a big conference, right? They didn't even try to hide it. That's why the Oathbreakers were on the island, right? But then they got eliminated or captured or something, so now the higher-ups are worried about the conference. I mean, if the Draconians formed a united front and they weren't opposed by the Oathbreakers, it would seriously upset the political landscape of the Mystics."

"I get that. What does this have to do with me?" I asked, trying to feign ignorance about how literally everything had to do with me.

"You see… The problem is that we don't really have that many agents in the Draconian families. They are too focused on bloodlines and some of them can even smell them. As in, literally. They take a whiff, and they can tell you're a Celestial, and then you're done for!" At this point, Mike realized he was using his hands to wildly gesticulate, so he crossed his arms and cleared his throat in embarrassment. "A-Anyways, the problem is that the meeting is going to be held behind closed doors, and we can't get in, but since you're dating the Dracis heir, the higher-ups thought that you might be able to, and so… well… you know?"

"… You want me to spy and report on the conference," I stated flatly, and the guy immediately uncrossed his arms and began waving them like he was attacked by a swarm of angry bees.

"No-no! I don't want you to! It's my boss' boss who thinks you might be able to maybe do it if you wanted to… but I don't think you would, right?" I remained silent, so he finally let his hands down in the company of a long sigh and added, "You see? This is why I didn't even want to bring this up anymore. I mean, I know you're an information broker, but I doubt you'd consider selling out your in-laws, especially after that whole discussion about morality."

"You're right on that point," I told him in a level voice. "Just for the record though, next time you try to negotiate with an information broker, you might want to abstain from giving out so many details about your operations."

"I… I'm still new to this field agent thing, so… Thank you for the advice?"

"You're welcome." I paused here to collect my thoughts, and then said, "By the way, tell your superiors that I would consider their offer."

"You would?" Mike all but exclaimed in surprise, so I gave him a serious nod.

"Certainly. It would naturally depend on the nature and conclusion of the negotiations, but so long as it doesn't endanger me and my inner circle, and you can make it worth my time, I would be foolish to categorically deny their offer."

"Is… that so?"

Of course, the main reason why I wanted to play along, for now, was so that I could sneak in some fake intel if necessary. Forming the new united Draconic/Knight faction was already a tricky undertaking, and the last thing I needed was the Celestials in the mix. If I refused to cooperate, they would just try to use other means, which could potentially lead to them interfering in my plans. However, if they thought they already had a spy inside, it would hopefully make them complacent, and delivering a few fake reports could potentially buy us the time we needed to consolidate things.

"In conclusion, I'll contact you in case I hear anything that might interest your superiors. Is there anything else?"

"Nothing related to Celestial business, I think, but…" Mike scratched the back of his head, and after some vacillation, he came out with, "I… have a more personal request, but I don't know how to say it after all of this."

"Is it about Ammy?" I inquired, and he stared at me like he thought I could read his mind. "Don't give me that look. What other personal topic could you want to talk about with me?"

"I… guess you're right," he mumbled. I waited for him to collect his thoughts, or courage, and at last he said, "I don't know if she told you about it, but we're… well, we're not quite dating, but I think we hit it off. I mean, I think I like her, and I don't think she dislikes me, and… and I'm rambling. Give me a second." At this point, he took several quick breaths, then sharply exhaled and told me, "It's just that I think something happened recently, and she's been keeping her distance, and I wanted to ask you if you could maybe tell me, or just have an idea, or… I don't know. Something."

I adopted a critical stare, but no matter how I looked, Mike appeared completely sincere. At last, I simply asked, "When did this start?"

"It's been a little over two weeks now," the hapless Celestial answered with equal measures of apprehension and expectation. "I think it started after Mister Jaacobah came to the island and I couldn't go with her to do… well, you know what we did, right?"

"You burglarized School property for sensitive documents. Yes, I'm aware."

He wasn't very happy with my choice of words, but couldn't refute me either, so he just continued.

"At first I thought she was mad at me because I couldn't accompany her, and I've heard that she ran into some trouble and they were almost captured, but when I asked her about it, she said it wasn't my fault and that she wasn't angry. But then, when I tried to invite her to the cinema, she said she wasn't feeling well, and she avoided meeting with me ever since."

"To be fair, our mid-terms just ended, so she might've been just busy."

"I know, but… I just feel that something's off, but I can't figure out what it is. I thought about asking Joshua, but that would've been awkward, so I figured I'd ask you for advice. Did I do something wrong? Did I mess up?"

"No, I wouldn't say so," I answered while the gears in my head were already turning.

So if this started after the fight with Sahi. In other words, it was either because she was down after nearly being caught, or… Dammit, this has something to do with the whole 'homunculus' thing, doesn't it? One of these days, I seriously had to sit down with the class rep and pry this mystery out of her, or it will drive me crazy. But that's for later, now back to the conversation at hand.

"Let's just say that Amelia has a secret that got revealed around that time, so she was probably just stressed out."

"Secret? What kind of secret?"

"I obviously can't tell, but… Let's just say I personally don't think it's a big deal. She does though, so you probably shouldn't ask directly."

Mike nodded along, but then asked, "Sooo… should I say it indirectly? Or should I tell her I don't mind if she keeps some secrets? Or… maybe I should ask if she had a secret, and then tell her it doesn't matter? Would that be more natural?"

"It's a question for you to figure out," I said with a shrug. "Just remember that she's not keeping her distance because of you. I mean, probably. I'm not a mind reader, but she certainly doesn't seem to be mad at you."

"You have no idea how happy that makes me," he responded with a toothy grin, but then the expression on his face withered into a troubled frown. "But… when should I tell her all that? Doing it through the phone feels wrong somehow…"

For a second or five, I hesitated, but I ultimately figured I was already embroiled in the topic, so I might as well go the extra mile and give him some proper advice.

"If you're worried about that, I recommend asking her out on a date during our school festival. It's apparently a prime date venue."

"You mean, like… a proper date?"

"Sure. You already had a few of those, right?"

"I… I'm not sure. We watched a few movies and hung out in the city, but we never had a proper date. At least I don't think so."

"It's your call, but if you want to clear the air, it's definitely the best opportunity. You can also come and watch her performance." He was giving me an uncomprehending look, so I clarified, "Our class is putting up an idol concert, and Ammy is part of the group."

"She's going to sing? On a stage? In one of those frilly uniforms?"

Last I checked, she was only doing the dance and some background humming, but I nodded anyway, and the guy's eyes opened wide in alarm.

"Is something wrong?"

"N-No, it's just that… I wonder how popular she'll be after that…"

"She's already one of the most popular girls in school," I told him off-handedly.

"She is?"

"That's half the reason why she was elected to perform," I told him, and Mike's expression went through about five different flavors of anxiety. "Is there a problem with that?"

"No, nothing," he denied in a hurry. "Thanks for letting me know. I'll definitely, definitely ask her out!"

"Do as you will. I have no horse in this race," I said with another shrug, but then added, "Just be sure you know what you're getting into."

Hearing my stray words made the guy freeze up like I just dumped a bucket of cold water over his head.

"What do you mean?"

"Do I have to spell this out?" He was still confused, so I rolled my eyes and said, "You're a Celestial agent now. She's the granddaughter of the local Arch-mage. If anyone gets a whiff of this, they are going to assume you're trying to get close to her as part of some spy operation."

"But… I'm not."

"I'm inclined to believe you, but that's just me. Endymonion certainly won't let this slide, and your superiors will surely want you to capitalize on your position. Either way, the day might come when you'll have to choose a side. Just make sure you're aware of this before you take a dive."

"I'll…" Mike wrestled with his thoughts for a while, and ultimately told me, "Thank you for the warning."

"Don't mention it."

After this, we remained silent for a couple of minutes, but whatever my guest was thinking, he didn't say. At the end of the day, he let out a heavy breath and rose to his feet.

"I think I should leave. I have to think this through." I didn't hold him back, but simply led him to the entrance and waited for him to put on his coat. It was only when he was fully dressed that he turned back to me and said, "If you want to contact the Intelligence Network, just call me."

Under normal circumstances, I would've simply nodded and let the guy go on his merry way, but looking at his conflicted expression tickled the unrepentant meddler in me.

"I'll do that. Also, in case you can't resolve your loyalties, you're also free to contact me."

"… What do you mean?"

"Let's just say I'm someone who's a bit of an expert at putting a third option into binary dilemmas. In other words, don't sweat it too much, and you can consider me your backup."

"I…" He hesitated, but then the tension slowly left his shoulders and he gave me a thin-lipped smile. "Thanks, Leonard. I owe you one. I mean, another one."

"Again, don't mention it."

With that, we said our goodbyes, and Mike left the premises with heavy, yet steady steps.

As for me, I locked the door behind me and closed my eyes. Honestly speaking, I knew that supporting the budding relationship between Mike and the class rep would probably lead to troubles, hijinks, and potentially even shenanigans. While they weren't at each other's throats like the Draconians and the Knights, the Mages and the Celestials had about as much bad blood between them. There was no way in hell it would work out without any issues, but if the guy was willing to jump into the deep end, I figured I should at least throw him a lifebelt.

It was the least I could do as a fellow victim of the Romeo & Juliet archetype…