Rowan and Syryn slept on the same bed as couples did but the intimacy between them was lacking. The mage was awake on the third night since their departure from Coop. Rowan's arm was around his waist and the man was fast asleep, breathing deep and even. 

I sense that you have questions. 

Syryn gently ran his fingers down each rounded knuckle on Rowan's hand. He was restless and it soothed him when he touched the anti mage.

[You told me that you're just a small part of the Sage's consciousness that was left behind after his death.]

That is true. 

[For what purpose did the Sage leave you in the pearl?]

To find a successor. 

[Me.]

Yes. I will pass on what knowledge I have and then leave you to inhabit a new body.

[What if you stay in my head till I die?]

That would be unwise. 

[I'm not asking you to. I was just curious.]

You are in a bad mood?

[I'm frustrated because I don't know who I am. I am Syryn Nigh'hart, alchemist, healer, half-demon, and I have known Rowan Windwalker my whole life. But they are mere facts to me, like knowing that the sun is warm. I don't have an identity.]

I'm sorry. I can imagine how terrible that feels. 

[Like missing a limb.]

I can return your memories right now if you want them. 

[What about the hidden memories?]

I am yet to find a way to unlock them without alerting the entity that hid them away. But I've come to find that this... person who locked your memories is very powerful. We do not want them to notice what I am trying to do. 

[How long until you can unlock them?]

I don't know. I'll keep prodding at it till I find a hole. Until then, you'll have to bear with the frustration. 

[It's fine, I guess... I only feel this way when I'm alone with my thoughts. If you return the memories then do we lose the chance to get to the hidden parts?]

Yes. Imagine a puzzle with half of the total number of pieces greyed out. To solve the puzzle, I needed the pieces of your memory that weren't greyed out. There's still a chance though that these memories will unlock by themselves when it's time for them to. 

[What makes you say that?]

Destroying memories is easier than locking them away. The person who did it wanted to keep your memories intact. It makes me think that they want you to have them back after the satisfaction of some condition they've set. 

[I was going to ask Rowan about it but I realised that even he can't help me with the secret memories. They remain out of reach despite the time we had in the past to unravel them.]

I have looked through your memories, Syryn. You are right about Rowan being unable to help you with it. 

[Can I just pretend that I'm an ordinary man without any responsibilities? I want to live a normal life and not have to deal with the crap that's getting shoved my way despite me never asking for any of it.]

It's up to you. 

[Like hell it is. I'm going to grab Levia and get out of Silisia. Then I'll forget all about it and never go back because the mers are right, I can't rule over mermen.]

The sage is the rightful ruler of the ocean. You are the sage now, Syryn. A part of you has joined with the magic of the ocean and that makes you worthy to rule over mermen and sirens alike.

[I refuse.]

Then choose a wise ruler for Silisia. You are content with the son of the mer who harmed you?

[If you're asking about Drevin then yes, I am sure he will make a good king. He may be a little arrogant but he's soft inside, and smart enough to handle the unruly nobles. He doesn't share his father's ideals so that's another reason he would make a better King than his father ever did.]

Then give him a scale from your body. It will be a way for him to reach out to you when you're needed.

[Teach me how to turn back into a snake.]

All you have to do is picture yourself as a black serpent and push every ounce of will into becoming it.

[Like this? Ah-] 

Syryn began to transform into the sleek black creature he had imagined. 

[I don't have hands! How am I supposed to pluck a scale?]

Use your teeth to pull the scale under your belly. 

[Will it hurt?]

No. 

A loud wheezing sound woke up Rowan. His sleep mussed hair fell over his eyes as the blond threw aside the blanket, ready to attack the cold slithering creature that was writhing under it. 

"What the hell is going on?" Rowan asked the black serpent who was belly up on the bed, clutching a scale in its mouth and writhing with vigour. 

The anti mage suspected the creature was Syryn and it was the only reason he hadn't already kicked it out of the bed. But what was he supposed to do? 

[You said it wouldn't hurt!!!!]

I said that because if I told you it was going to hurt, you would've hesitated and made it worse for yourself. Anyway, it's only a little pain. 

[This is just as bad as stubbing my toe.]

Look, your lover is worried. Stop wriggling so much.

_____

After transforming back into his human body, Syryn immediately dived under Rowan's chin and hugged the anti mage around his waist. The scale was still in his mouth feeling smooth and cold on his tongue.

If you swallow it accidentally, you'll be in much grater pain shitting it out.

The mage fearfully clenched his teeth around the scale and stuck to the anti mage like a barnacle. 

"Ryn, what's wrong?" 

Syryn popped out the scale that was in his mouth. 

"Just a bad dream, Ro. Let's go back to sleep."