Rowan's mind was heavy with worries. The most pressing problem was the elusive sea hag who still posed a danger to Syryn. Roga was wily and knew enough about the creature that he would survive a few weeks. With the Ruby circlet in his hands, the sorcerer would survive even longer. This period of reprieve would end if and when Roga was killed by his creation.

Problem number two - Rowan had to turn into a man as soon as possible. His little lover had lost all his vitality. Syryn often roamed the house like a ghost that was filled with regrets.

It wasn't so much about Rowan being a woman that haunted Syryn. The mage was being haunted by his own guilt. It upset Syryn that Rowan had transformed but then he thought about how much more troublesome it was for the anti mage, and that fed the flames of his guilt. 

When they slept together at night, Syryn no longer wanted to be held by Rowan because he could not adapt to a body that didn't feel like Rowan's. It was endearing but also depressing for both of them.

"Rowan," Syryn had said to him when the blond was falling asleep. "Kiss me."

The anti mage looked into Syryn's eyes and saw apprehension. "Are you sure?"

The mage dipped his head. "Do it."

"Don't force yourself to, Ryn."

But Syryn lowered his head and kissed the blond woman because the heart that beat inside was still Rowan. It was just a kiss, he could at least do that much.

______

Problem number three - Rowan could no longer visit the whisper pond. It was his primary source of information about everything that was going on in Elysium and beyond its borders. The anti mage had begun receiving news about political turmoil in several kingdoms, and these instances were seeing off the alarms in Rowan's mind. Trouble was fomenting beyond his expectations, and it was no coincidence.

His contacts were spread out across several kingdoms and news wasn't arriving as fast as he wanted them to. The changes that Syryn and he had set off in their second birth were only beginning to emerge. The ripples of their actions would turn into waves, which in turn would arrive as a flood to knock down his carefully laid plans. Rowan had to account for everything. And that was why he shunned responsibility in the Sanguine and also refused promotions. His lack of ambition, as speculated by the higher-ups, was another blessing in disguise. Rowan could keep his distance from the political infighting within the Sanguine.

"Rowan, did you find a solution to your problem?" Artemus stopped to ask him. The dark-eyed anti mage had been on his way out of the HQ. On an impulse, he stopped by Rowan's office and noticed that the blonde was lost in his thoughts.

The blond anti mage put away the paperwork he had been staring at for the past hour. "Not yet."

The older anti mage looked at the half-done paperwork. "I'm going out for lunch." It was an invitation that also sounded like a statement. It left room for Rowan to refuse without actually refusing. He could just say 'okay' and that would be the end of it.

"Rainy Pavilion?" Rowan asked. It was a high-end restaurant that was frequented by the more affluent members of the mage hunters.

"Too far. Let's go to The Cup. They serve meals faster than the other fancier places." That seemed more like Artemus. The anti mage hated wasting time.

Rowan stood up to follow the older anti mage. Artemus was an interesting person. He hadn't known the man well in their previous life because Artemus had presumably died before Rowan graduated. Understanding how deadly, intelligent, and efficient the man really was, Rowan knew he would make a good ally for their cause.

And so Rowan and Artemus were seen to be sharing lunch together and appearing very friendly with each other.

The dark-eyed anti mage ordered his favourites for the both of them. They talked about Roga, the sea hag, Syryn's plight, and even about Rowan's search for the maker of the gold idol. Artemus listened and suggested the ideas that were already on Rowan's mind.

And when they returned to the HQ, the two anti mages spent a quarter of an hour in Rowan's office. Artemus had intended to help Rowan with the paperwork since the blond looked like he wasn't in any mood to do much about frown at his papers. It was unfortunate that their activities were being closely monitored by a few gossiping members of the Sanguine. The rumour mill churned out some strange stories that spread beyond the walls of the Sanguine headquarters.

Syryn heard the news from Alka who had heard it from a shopkeeper who had, in turn, heard it from his cousin's husband who was a mage hunter. Rowan hadn't reached home but the rumour had already arrived.

"My brother and your boyfriend," Alka had said. "Were seen making out in Rowan's office. They were in there for an hour before Artemus walked out of the office, looking like the cat that got the cream."

Syryn snorted. It was going to take more than a rumour for him to ever doubt Rowan. His faith in Artemus was also strong. Neither was the type to betray him like that.

"The mage hunters like to gossip," Alka said, smiling at his friend's mild reaction.

"But there's no smoke without fire, Alka. I wonder what they've been up to to cause such rumours in the first place."

"Do you trust him?"

"Rowan? Yeah. I trust Artemus too."

"Let's spy on them then."

"What? No."

"Aren't you curious?"

"Yes, but I don't want to spy on Rowan. It feels wrong."

"Fine, fine," Alka rested his chin on the table.

Syryn was very sorry for what had happened. He was willing to do whatever it took to change Rowan back to himself. If only he hadn't insulted the idol, if only he hadn't allowed his curiosity to make his decisions, if only he hadn't been so impulsive.