Episode 23 – Saara’s Decision

“–What, me?”

I had just finished telling her the last part of my past when Saara responded.

“Yes. Since I met Saara, I’ve been trying to change.”
“W-Why?”
“Why? You don’t even know?”

When I point it out to her, she tilts her head wide and says, “Ummm… ……?” and then Saara growls with a big tilt of her head to the other side to see if it won’t come out.
I kind of chuckle when I think about how I was like this on my first day.

“When we were kids, I used to invite Saara to our house all the time, didn’t I?”
“Yeah.”
“The reason I was able to do that was because there were no other kids who would have asked Saara out That’s why I was able to monopolize you.”
“……”

Yes.
Saara and I were both childhood friends and friends, but the fact that we were together all the time meant that “I hardly or not at all played with the rest of the kids.”

I didn’t change much from there until middle school.
In ninth grade, I lost a lot of friends.

But what about Saara?

“I could never do something like that in Saara right now, could I? People naturally come to Saara now because it has ‘changed’. That’s because Saara has ‘changed’ from what she used to be.”

It is unbelievable how many people have gathered around Saara since those days.
I used to not think of her as a member of the opposite gender, and the feeling of being the opposite gender is naturally different between kindergarten and high school students.
Even taking that into account, I would never have been able to casually ask her out in front of everyone and monopolize her.

It is not because Saara attracts people with her natural charm.
I understand that better than anyone else in the class.

“I’m kind of devastated.”
“……”
“Saara has changed so much. So, if Saara said I should change, then I should change, too.”
“……, that’s not true.”

Why is it that I’m the only one who’s talking one-sidedly? …… I was just thinking that, when Saara stopped talking …….

“I …… still have some things I’m too scared to talk about ……. But for sure, back then, I always had Sora kun to help me.”
“Me?”

I was surprised to hear the unexpected word.
I wonder if I ever helped Saara before.

“Maybe you didn’t mean it that way”
“Because I can’t think of any right now.”
“Yeah. If I changed, it was really Sora kun who changed me. I was a shy kindergartener, but you made me a child who could talk in front of everyone.”

Oh, I see.
I really just wanted someone to play with, so if you were taking it that seriously, I’m happy for you, but I’m also sorry.

“So, Sora kun”
“Ah.”
“I’m sorry for swinging you around without knowing anything about your past. Also, thank you for changing …….”

Then, the words continue.

“Now it’s my turn.”

Saara sat back down next to me and took both my hands in hers, wrapping them around hers.
…… warm.
Her heat seemed to flow into my cold body.

The first time I saw her, I thought I was in awe of her.

“I swear to God, I would risk my life to tell you. I will never betray you, Sora kun”

This would be …… for the false confession.
The oath is heavy for that, and above all, it is essentially none of her business.

“Hey, come on, it’s not like Saara’s business”
“Noo, Sora kun helped me, but I couldn’t help him when he was in the most pain. Even if it can’t be helped, Even if it’s something that can’t be undone–“

Saara raised her gaze from her clasped hands and locked eyes with me.

“Now I am in a place where I can help you when you are in trouble. So, when you need an ally, remember my name. I will always be on your side.”

….. Oh, I knew she was great.
Saara gave me the words I needed the most.

If she had said that she wanted to make up for the damage that had done, I would have brushed her off.
If she had said she wanted to go out with me to make up for being rejected because of a false confession, I would have rejected her.
Even if she had saved me with that kind of self-sacrifice, like a sense of duty, I would not have been convinced.

Finally, I understood.
I had always wanted someone I could proudly say was on my side.

“Thank you, Saara, you are more like a prince than a princess”
“…..it’s so weird and strange to be called that”

I guess that’s true for her.
But at school, Saara is a neat and tidy beauty with long hair.

“But to me, Sora kun is the prince.”
“How can that be?”
“You are unaware of it, aren’t you, Sora kun?”

No, I think that’s just Saara overestimating me.

“…… by the way, Saara.”
“Yeah.”
“I mean, you know, ……. Close…….”

As soon as I said the word.
Saara’s face turned bright red and she stood up.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry!”
“It’s okay, it’s okay. Calm down.”
“I’m sorry I was so forceful with you out of the blue, was that uncomfortable?”
“It was nice and warm.”
“……! R-Really……?”

As usual, Saara overreacts when I apologize.
In fact, I think Saara would even forgive me if I were a little pushy in what I do.

“……, I don’t know, I’m getting tired of talking and hungry.”
“I-I know right! I’m going to prepare dinner! You saved me from being picked up today, and I’m going to make you a hearty meal!”
“No, I’ll make it for you, as a thank you for being on my side.”
“I’m weak when you serve it to me!”

We ended up cooking one dish each and praised each other’s cooking at dinner.

I feel like I was finally able to let out the things that I had been holding inside of …… me, despite everything that had happened.
I feel lighter.

Besides.

I’m not sure what to do with the rest of it.
The princess of the school told me that she is on my side at all times.
I couldn’t have felt more reassured.

That’s why I made up my mind.
I would stand by Saara’s side at any time for her sake.