Restricted Doomsday Syndrome

In Dr. Ruan Li ’s calm recount, the origin of all this-including those I have to believe in, about the setting of "Doom Fantasy" and "Hospital Reality", as well as the mystery and fate intertwined in the story, and even The truth that Dr. Ruan Li knows is actually derived from the white Claudia, not the "virus" I learned from the "hospital reality".

Strictly speaking, in the truth stated by Dr. Ruan Li, "virus" does not exist, and "jiang" naturally does not exist. Of course, the "mystery" generated by attaching to the two is certainly non-existent. However, "white Claudia" exists, and the "paradise" created by "white Claudia" did not exist before, but the concept is similar, also known as "paradise" Manufacturing plans exist. Most "mysterious organizations" do not exist, including cyber balls, Nazis, and ruling bureaus. However, doomsday doctrine exists, and it is always active. However, the truth of doomsday doctrine and my diary The description is different.

In the doomsday illusion, no one can determine the origin of the "mystery", but most of the "mystery" can be related to the gray fog. The past doomsday illusions also involve different spaces and demons. In today ’s doomsday illusions, common mysterious systems such as demons, fog, magic patterns, and even wizards can all be attributed to the origin of the "ruling bureau." There are also many people who believe that the ruling bureau-whether it is the predecessor of the different space in the past, or the ruins of the ruling bureau today-developed a whole set of incomprehensible extraordinary technologies, and then a technical disaster occurred for some reason, so Only a part of the technology and the side effects of the technology leaked out, causing the "mystery" to appear frequently in our world.

These people believe that it includes the prophets, Mageweave messengers, wizards, and more mysterious forces that are difficult to be included in the system. They can all be interpreted using the technology of the ruling bureau. The only thing that makes people feel tricky is how to dig out and understand more technical information about the ruling bureau. Although when referring to the word "technology". Very normal taste of science and technology, however. When actually digging and researching these ruling bureau technologies, the whole process also gives people a sense of inexplicability. So far, I have not seen anyone claiming that they have found the rules of interpretation. Once the research involves the technique of the ruling bureau, everyone often describes it as "mysterious" rather than "incomprehensible technology."

There is a fundamental difference between "mystery" and "incomprehensible science and technology."

I don't know much about the ruling bureau. In the past doomsday illusion, those seemingly predecessors of the ruling bureau titled "doom illusion" in different spaces, I have not been there many times, maybe the trip is too rushed, maybe there is a force in the dark to stop I have entered that place many times, but now, in retrospect, the "doom illusion" from the perspective of "hospital reality" and the "doom illusion" from the perspective of the past "doom illusion", the meaning between the two is different.

There are many concepts of nouns. When I arrived at the "Hospital Reality", it had changed, and in today's doomsday illusion, it has been modified beyond recognition. For example, in the past doomsday illusion, the way to obtain the magic pattern and the way to increase the level of the magic pattern are actually clearer than today. As the most clear mysterious power system at that time, the pattern of the entire mystery circle operated It is also clearer than it is today, and the fate that the Mageweave messenger himself has to carry. It is also heavier than it is now. At that time, the Mageweave messenger was also known as the Heavenly Chosen. As its literal meaning, Mageweave Messenger and Prophet. It is considered to be the two most important parts in the fate of the end.

However, today's Mageweave messenger, its existence and importance, has become very tense, and the name of "Heavenly Selector" has completely ceased to be heard.

I do n’t miss the past doomsday illusions, and I do n’t like the reality of the hospital. However, compared to what I see and hear in different worlds and different time periods, I ca n’t help but doubt the difference between the details. Moreover, I don't entirely think that it is because the "world" is evolving and becoming perfect. On the contrary, the doomsday illusions of the past and the present, as well as the reality of the hospital, based on what I can observe, there are many places that people think are extremely vague. It is this kind of vagueness that makes people feel like they are falling into a dream.

Every time I experience, the world I observe is "incomplete". There is an "incomprehensible mystery" in the end of the illusion itself. All "incomplete" are completed with "incomprehensible mystery" And elaborate, and the reality of the hospital is narrow, what the world outside the island looks like, I still do n’t know very well. And those things that make me think of my memory are recorded in a hallucinatory way, is n’t it strange?

I have always had a dissatisfaction with my memory and the world in which I exist. Because of this dissatisfaction, many emotions have been bred, and it has prompted me to take actions that ordinary people cannot. Others feel that the world in which they exist is taken for granted. If there is a secret, it will be understandable sooner or later. However, I am different.

I think that there are too many things in this world that are not so "justified", not only in human society, but also in mysterious events, but also in themselves. It is difficult for me to explain, what is it that makes me feel unnatural and feels unreasonable, if it looks different, what should it look like? I really can't imagine what would happen to the real world if all the things I experienced were untrue.

Thinking in accordance with this logic will only make people's brains confused. As if, these questions involve the ultimate philosophy of mankind, and no definitive answer can be obtained.

However, when I think about it this way, there is indeed a feeling that "everything is an illusion". The closest description of this feeling is undoubtedly the interpretation of "all empty" by the Buddhas in Asian mystics.

However, from a philosophical and biological point of view, human beings cannot absorb and realize "illusions" in the "empty" state. The concept of "illusion" was produced relative to the concept of "truth". This also means that no matter what I have experienced. What secrets are there, how many are hallucinations, but. There must also be a corresponding "truth" among them.

In my opinion, this corresponding "truth" hidden behind illusions and dreams. It is a kind of basic point of knowing the real world. How many characteristics it has, I can't be sure, but I can be sure that it must be "the existence of everything. Perhaps, it is a little difficult to understand only the theoretical description, but. If this basic point is visually regarded as "something that exists in everything I can observe and feel", is it easier to understand?

Yes, I think so. To understand reality, you must first find a true base point, and then base on this base point to observe everything around you. And this real basic point, said in a small way. It must be "everything that exists in every situation".

In the past doomsday illusion, I used to think that such things were everywhere; and after arriving at the hospital reality. I began to doubt. When I realized the existence of "virus" from the information in the hospital, the concept of "virus" and the concept of "Jiang" were unified, and it was in this situation that I thought I found " "The real basic point" is the mixed concept of "virus" and "jiang", which exists in both the reality of the hospital and the illusion of the end. And, the distance with me is so close. It can be said that the characteristics it shows. They almost perfectly meet the definition of "existing in myself and everything I can observe and feel".

Even now, after reaching the world of repeaters, in this environment where the "mysterious" system has undergone tremendous changes again, it is still feasible to observe everything based on "viruses" and "jiang", however Looking at everything based on this mixed concept is also painful and desperate. Because, the meaning and result of "virus" and "jiang" do not exist close to my ideal. Instead, their existence is itself a kind of destruction and maliciousness to the ideal world that I am looking forward to.

Under such circumstances, I will fall in love with "Jiang", which is something that even I feel incredible. Although it is incredible, I still accept it-just at this point, I can evaluate my spirit, there must be something wrong.

However, while accepting this situation, while trying to use this situation to correct the world that I think should not be such, I never thought about whether there will be a second one, and this " The "true basis point" is completely contradictory, or it may theoretically cover its "more authentic basis point."

Because, before this, I have never heard of a concept that is more penetrating and easier to understand and accept than the mixed concept of "virus" and "jiang".

Until this evening, Dr. Ruan Li mentioned it-at least for me now, the situation she said can also relatively perfectly explain what is happening around her. The only problem is that it is more difficult to accept her statement than to accept that "the hospital reality is the real reality", and this difficulty lies in my understanding of the world of repeaters, and the three aspects of the world of repeaters, doomsday illusions and hospital realities The inherent cognition of the dependence relationship between the two.

Therefore, when Dr. Ruan Li wanted me to believe her, I could only keep silent. Although she did not behave unexpectedly and frustrated, I still feel that if I can, I do not want to remain silent at such times.

"Actually, I have said the same thing to you many times." Dr. Ruan Li said: "However, it has become more and more difficult for you to recognize what is real, your spirit is in It ’s already shabby in the real shake. You know, when I guide the patients, in most cases, they do n’t directly mention the situation that directly conflicts with their ideas. Suppose a mental patient thinks that something exists Then, if I judge that his hallucinations are not substantially threatened, I will not tell him by hard means that that thing does not exist. Because although the mentality of the patients is problematic, it is often It is stubborn. Whether the direct conflict of cognition can save the other party or not has not yet been completely concluded. "

"Mom, you mean. Have you treated me with a very direct cognitive conflict?" I couldn't help asking: "Have you tried to force what you think is correct and true into my mind?" "

"Yes," Dr. Ruan Li replied without changing his face. There was no slight change in tone and mood, although she knew it. This approach is very unflattering, and I can imagine it. The whole process must also be filled with inhumane places. Mandatory adjustment of the mental state of mental patients. It is inevitable to use some cruel machines and illegal drugs with great side effects. At this time, I have no feelings or memories in this respect, but I don't think Dr. Ruan Li is lying.

She does n’t need to lie, and I wo n’t hate her because of this. It ’s determined by my character, and she should know this, I think.

"I always regret it. At that time, I might have been too anxious to get results." Dr. Ruan Li's eyebrows softened and filled with apology. "Since then, the effectiveness of stimulant therapy has been declining. In the previous stage, your performance was normal for a while, but it quickly returned to the state of the onset. "

"You mean, hallucinations?" I asked. I know that she always thought that my abnormal behavior and abnormal thoughts. It's all based on hallucinations. And the diary I wrote must be very incredible in the eyes of ordinary people, unable to touch the "mysterious" words. It was just a story full of delusions, and yet Dr. Ruan Li has shown incredible resistance to "mystery" so far.

If Dr. Ruan Li is not regarded as a "mysterious inhibitory force" and "repeater core", then her existence is undoubtedly more real than any mystery.

It is this reality that makes me willing to listen to Dr. Ruan Li's statement, even if I think this statement is more incredible than the "hospital reality"-for anyone who cannot reach the "hospital reality". The existence of "hospital reality" is in itself incredible.

"Whether it is merely an illusion. It is not certain, but. The term" illusion "is indeed the most common term at present." Dr. Ruan Li gave a reply.

I ’m thinking that Dr. Ruan Li is selling some things, and she went on to say: “Actually, you lose more memory than you think. For example, you are really sure that the diary you write is only what you see So some? "

"What do you mean?" Despite what Dr. Ruan Li said, there was nothing incomprehensible, but there was an unexpected impulse in my heart.

"Before you become like this, you have started to write a diary." Dr. Ruan Li said: "When your condition is not so serious, your record in the diary is different from the current record. Although there is no lack of relevance, it looks more like two worlds. You think that when you were 16 or 7 years old, you recognized a mysterious world and knew the doomsday truth, white Claudia He Paradise, but in fact, you have heard of them when you were eight years old. "

I was silent, and I couldn't believe it. Dr. Ruan Li said that maybe it was the "Gaochuan" that existed in this world before I arrived in this world of repeaters, but the huge difference in age makes people feel incredible. Dr. Ruan Li's words mean that this world of repeaters holds all the activities and existence records of the "Gaochuan" that has existed since at least eight years old.

And my own records of activities and existence, in terms of Doomsday Illusions, have disappeared as long as the Doomsday Illusions of the past are destroyed.

Compared with me now, the Gaochuan known by Dr. Ruan Li undoubtedly has a more real sense of existence.

"Do you remember your own past before being exposed to those mysterious events?" Dr. Ruan Li asked me.

I shook my head because, although there was a little impression, not everything was clear. I have forgotten many things, including the smiles of my parents and childhood partners. I always think that this is a very normal thing. When people grow up, the memories they have are mostly a vague outline. Therefore, the feeling of "namely sight" will be produced.

"You never doubted, why is your memory so blurred before becoming a Mageweave messenger?" Dr. Ruan Li said as she stepped on the pebbles on the road with her feet. She was leading me towards her room. Going, "Actually, people's memories are not always so vague. There are always some occasional chances that will make people clearly recall the things that impressed them, especially those who care about them. "

"Mom, do you want to say that the reason I am ambiguous is because those memories are false?" I asked sharply.

"Yes, in your diary today, you have not recorded the past, but in the diary earlier, what you recorded about yourself is false. You just did something for your identity background It is more in line with the setting of the protagonist of the story. Although there are some general backgrounds in the diary, in general-without parental constraints, there is a certain amount of funds, and you can transform your room into a workshop at will. Technical knowledge and so on-are n’t they prepared for the frequent adventures after the story develops? You never thought about it, or said, do n’t care at all, how can a top student in a school not disturb adults And realize those willful choices. In the story you think is true, when you first met Zuo Jiang, the strange and charming woman, so easily integrated into your post-natal life, then, your The focus of life is also in spring and autumn, of course, to avoid any troubles that actually exist in life, simply shift from high school to foreign adventures. I do not think it really is very natural, very real you? "

"From the perspective of hospital realities, doomsday illusions are not reality." I retorted.

"So, do you think the reality of the hospital is reality?" Dr. Ruan Li's question was very powerful, and I could only be silent.

I also don't think that hospital reality is reality.

"Actually, even in the near future, a large part of the diary you write is actually forgotten by you." Dr. Ruan Li changed the subject and said: "You said what you wrote is more than you think There are more. Maybe you do n’t remember, but you used the third person to describe other Gaochuan, including the prosthetic Gaochuan and Dorothy, and the reality of the hospital. It ’s just, I think, you use When writing a diary in the first person, those contents are the things you think you can really see, so those 'things you don't see' become the descriptions of the third person, if the first person story is written In general, this approach seems very formal, but the problem is that you do forget the content of the story you wrote in the third person. "

I couldn't help but widen my eyes, I forgot, the story I wrote? No, it should be understood that Dr. Ruan Li thinks that I have forgotten the contents of the diary written by the Gaochuan that she knew in the past? Although one can think of it this way, Dr. Ruan Li's statement is indeed no problem.

"When did I write ..." I paused and asked, "Is there evidence?"

Dr. Ruan Li shrugged and opened the door ~ www.readwn.com ~ took the laptop out of the suitcase and said, "This kind of conversation, in fact, we have repeated many times in the past, but, more and more later , The more you heard this kind of thing for the first time. I ca n’t guarantee that when you have confirmed the evidence this time, when will you forget it and think that you have never seen it. ”

"I will record it. Write it in my diary." I said quickly.

"Look, you will selectively forget what you have written." Dr. Ruan Li sighed. "This guarantee is actually meaningless. You can't control yourself at all. In fact, we have known this kind of thing for a long time. Now. "

What she meant was obvious—I could n’t control myself, and I always forgot some truth, so I was immersed in the illusion, and even regarded the illusion as reality, so even if I see the evidence now, I will not forget it later, It is to bypass these evidences and attach them to hallucinations as much as possible.

"Ignore it ... Do you want to say that? Mother." I watched Dr. Ruan Li lift the screen and said hesitantly. In her eyes, this is probably the most difficult situation when treating me. (Want to know more exciting activities of "Restricted Level Doomsday Syndrome"? Open WeChat now, click on the "+" sign on the upper right, choose to add a public number to your friends, search for "wang", follow the public number, and never miss it again Every update!) (To be continued)