I’m a Director, I’m Not Bad

  Chapter 304 302. Wind mixed with tobacco, alcohol and cigars

   These days, if you want to ask where is the best place to go for business banquets in Yanjing, they are high-end ones. Nine out of ten people will tell you that it is heaven and earth.

   One is the rules, the other is that the younger sister is beautiful, and the third is "safety".

  Don’t worry about any guests coming, from crushes to waiters and even toilet cleaners, you don’t have to worry about your information being exposed or what.

  Wang Sicong called to play today is also here.

   There are quite a lot of people.

   Both men and women.

   Don’t ask people what they do or how they got here.

  I was called here today to praise Xu Xin and "The Wind".

  From the time when Xu Xin and the others came here after eating, they can say that they are welcome in the lane, or that they can say that they are hugging each other.

  Under the deliberately created class, the charm of the night scene began to bloom slowly.

  Xu Xin hasn't been to this kind of place for a long time.

  At this moment, the room is full of fragrant wind, and he is also restless.

  However, the more agitated he was, the calmer he became.

   While everyone was singing and dancing, he took a glass of wine and sat in a corner, looking at the crowd drinking and laughing, as if in a daze.

  Until the young master who had just finished drinking with a group of Xu Xin's younger sisters who didn't know where they came from came over.

   "What are you doing? You don't fit in at all."

   "I'm afraid of making mistakes."

   After taking the cigarillo handed over by Wang Sicong, he touched Wang Sicong with the cup and said:

   "The daughter-in-law is not allowed to touch, she is very restless. You have to restrain yourself."

  Hearing this, Wang Sicong didn't say anything.

  Nodding slightly:

"Then let's play more plainly next time... Today, Bullet is yelling to find more sisters to accompany... None of them are from here, and I don't know where he found them. It seems that they are all models of Wanwan here. What…"

   "I can tell, it's a Wanwan accent with one mouth."

  Xu Xin responded and said:

   "Anyway, be careful, don't let anyone use a mobile phone to take pictures there or do something else."

   "Oh yes, I remembered what you said. Did you watch the Apple conference two days ago?"

"…What the hell?"

  Wang Sicong was speechless for a while looking at Xu Xin's surprised appearance:

   "Forget it, it's okay. When we leave later, you come with me in the car. I got two mobile phones for you and Dami..."

"how is it like?"

   "Just...the kind with a touch screen. Smartphones, let me tell you, are amazing!"

   "..."

  After hearing this, Xu Xin looked at his Nokia, a little speechless:

   "Then why don't you use it?"

   "Fuck, that thing has to cut the card. I bought the tool, but it hasn't arrived yet. I can only put the SIM card in after I cut it."

   "It's quite troublesome..."

   "No, but the function should be useless. You will know it after you use it... Hey, look, Lin Gou is a bitch..."

  Following the direction he pointed, Xu Xin saw that he was there with the two girls... He must have won the game, and the two girls kissed him on the face.

   "..."

  Xu Xin was a little speechless.

  I always feel like I saw my former self.

  However, the two sitting next to Lin Gou were also chatting.

   Huang Xiaoming and Yang Ying seemed to be talking about something.

   I am quite happy.

   And to the side...

  Liu Yifei sat there alone like a fool.

  No one talks to her, and she doesn't talk to others.

   looks out of place.

  Xu Xin thought for a while, then turned to Wang Sicong and said:

   "Okay, get out of here."

   "...?"

  The young master said in his heart, you don't want me to be a dish anymore.

  However, he saw Xu Xin take out his phone after saying this.

  He decided not to go.

   Moreover, his eyes were fixed on Xu Xin's cell phone.

  I want to see what tricks this grandson is going to play.

   As a result, he sent a message to Liu Yifei:

   "You come to my place."

   "...your uncle's."

   After swearing at the street, the young master obediently got up and went to join Jay Chou who was doing magic tricks for a few girls.

  …

"What's the matter?"

  Carrying her handbag, Liu Yifei walked over, still holding her glass of wine.

  Xu Xin unscrewed the bottle of Macallan in front of him:

"Try this?"

"Well…"

  Looking down at the red wine in her quilt, she nodded:

"good."

  So Xu Xin took another clean cup from the cup holder, put two cubes of ice in it, poured a third of the Macallan and handed it to her.

  The sound of cheers is hidden in the restless music.

   "You really don't fit in."

  Hearing this, Liu Yifei, who took a sip of his wine, glanced at him and said:

   "Aren't you the same?"

   "It's not the same, I want to be like some sluts..."

  Pointing to Wang Sicong, who hooked up with a **** the shoulder, and a group of girls watching Jay Chou doing magic tricks, Xu Xin smiled and revealed the silver ring on his left hand:

   "But I'm married."

  “…I’m not used to being in contact with strangers either. But tonight I’m very happy, because I rarely participate in such… lively occasions.”

   "Then what do you usually do?"

"stay at home."

   Liu Yifei shook his head slightly:

   "My mother is afraid that I will be bad, and that people outside will "bad" me... If she knew that I was here today, she would have come to pick me up a long time ago."

   "So... when will you be ready to face the world alone?"

   "I've been prepared for a long time."

  Before she finished speaking, Xu Xin glanced at her.

   And this glance, Liu Yifei saw an emotion from it.

   Regret.

  He, after hearing his answer, regretted it, and picked up the wine glass.

   Waiting for myself.

"Ding."

  After the two glasses touched, Xu Xin drank the wine in his glass in one gulp.

good.

  He kind of tasted the subtle leather taste of Macallan.

   Well, of course, it may also be an illusion caused by the taste of cigars.

  But... Lao Wang's preference for this wine cannot be faked.

  A bottle of Macallan 25 years old sells for at least 160,000 to 20,000.

  Here directly flip over.

   Sixty thousand and one bottles.

  After the smoky and slightly heavy wine was poured down his throat, Liu Yifei recalled the look in his eyes just now, and suddenly asked:

   "Why are you looking at me like that?"

   "It's a pity."

   Xu Xin shook his head slightly.

"…pity?"

  Liu Yifei was a little puzzled.

  Until I was asked a...seemingly simple question, but extremely difficult to answer:

   "You became an actor...for what?"

"Well…"

   "I don't mean any childhood aspirations, or parents' sustenance, etc. I mean... Personally, what are you an actor for?"

   "..."

  Liu Yifei thought for a while, and vaguely felt that the question he asked should not be so simple.

  But I can't figure out what it is for.

   can only say:

"For this dream."

  “…The dream is to be an actor?”

"right."

  After she gave an affirmative answer, she saw Xu Xin shaking her head slightly.

   Obviously, she was very dissatisfied with her answer.

   "Is there something wrong with my answer?"

   Seeing her questioning, Xu Xin picked up the wine bottle.

   While pouring her some wine, he said:

   "You actually didn't figure it out yourself, did you?"

   "..."

   "Because I think your answer is very guilty."

   "...What about you? Why are you a director?"

  Liu Yifei seemed a little unconvinced.

"because I like it."

  Xu Xin gave the answer very happily.

   Then, he picked up the cup, leaned on the sofa, threw the cigar into the ashtray, and lit a cigarette again.

  Cigars are nothing but lungs.

   Smoking still feels a little uncomfortable.

   "I said that I changed overnight, do you believe it?"

   "...?"

  Because of the change in Xu Xin's posture, she also had to lean on the sofa.

  But because of the height difference, she had to get closer when listening to Xu Xin.

  So at first glance, the distance between the two is really ambiguous.

  But Xu Xin didn't care.

   Liu Yifei didn't feel it either.

   "That day... I remember it very clearly. It was the end of the first half of the freshman year. I will tell you that my position in the director department was paid for by my dad with sponsorship money."

   "..."

  A little dark history was spoken from his mouth.

   But the attitude is very calm.

   But Liu Yifei felt the same way...

because…

   So did she.

   "Have you seen the news about the first half of the freshman year?"

   "I've seen it, and I've heard it from Mimi. You often skip classes, sleep, and drive a Ferrari every day at the school gate...to show off."

   "Ha~"

  Xu Xin chuckled and nodded:

"Well. That's right... My change was actually very abrupt. After half a semester of this drunken life, at the end of the freshman year, I was still living in the school dormitory. At the end of the school dormitory party, I invited them to eat The meal, the drink, and then this kind of place..."

   Speaking of this, he paused before saying:

   "Anyway, after getting drunk, I had a dream."

"…Dream?"

"Yes. I can't remember the details of the second half of the dream. But I remember the first half very clearly... I dreamed that I returned home from Yanjing. My childhood friends helped me to clean up the dust, and we went to a nightclub. Then...it was like we walked across each other. You drank too much, and I drank too much. We just bumped shoulders..."

"Um."

  Liu Yifei listened carefully.

"After bumping like this, I was annoyed. Anyway... I was young and frivolous. I dreamed that I was fighting with someone. I smashed that person's head with my mobile phone... and finally smashed him into a vegetative state. "

   "Uh...dream?"

   "Yes, dreaming."

  Xu Xin nodded.

   And Liu Yifei showed a look of peace of mind.

   Startled.

"After smashing him into a vegetative state... I have money. I lost money, but after I lost money, I was fired from Beiying again because of this. I live this kind of drunken life every day... I've been wandering in society A few years ago, my dad took me to the mine to find a job in an energy company. That’s probably what it meant, and this was the beginning of my transformation.”

   "..."

  Under Liu Yifei's strange eyes, Xu Xin said with a smile:

   "Really, isn't it ridiculous?"

   "Just because of a dream?"

"Yes, it was just because of a dream... Now it may be because the time is too long, I can't remember many details of that dream. But at that time... when I woke up from the hotel, the dream happened... for a few years, Even more than ten years of life, just spinning in my head like this... Do you know what my first reaction was when I was sure it was a dream?"

  When he said this, there was a...very genuine look of gratitude in his eyes.

  Looking at the person next to him who was nicknamed Sister Immortal, who is the girl with a touch of white moonlight in youth, he shook his head slightly:

   "I, absolutely, don't want to live the kind of life in the dream. I don't have big ambitions, just eat and wait to die. Although it is not harmful to nature, it is a life of doing evil and wasting time!"

   "..."

   "So, I said to myself: I want to change my life... poof..."

  He took a puff of cigarette, although the smoke did not blow to Liu Yifei.

  The escaping smoke still got into her nasal cavity.

  She...doesn't really like other people smoking.

   I don't like the smell of smoke either.

  It's just... For some reason, this time, she didn't feel any discomfort from the smell in her nose.

On the contrary, it was mixed with white wine, whiskey, and even cigars and tobacco, which made her smell...not a pleasant smell, but...very weird, as if there was a period of time hidden in it, and a...smell of transformation breath.

   Her throat moved.

   Unconsciously narrowed his eyes.

   This breath made her head a little hot.

   After waking up quickly, he said:

   "So, you chose to change your way of life?"

"right."

   "Just because of this one dream?"

  After she finished asking, Xu Xin suddenly shook her head seriously:

   "It's not a dream, it's real."

   "..."

"Or, for me, it is true. In my dream, I experienced a period... or I belonged to me, or... I in a parallel world experienced a real life! My statement is absurd, yes Bar?"

  Looking at the silent girl Xu Xin still smiling, shaking his head:

   "Actually, Yang Mi and I haven't talked about this matter... Let's treat it as a secret between us, how about it?"

   "..."

  Liu Yifei's eyes moved...

  Suddenly pursed his lips:

"Um!"

"Actually, I also know that my statement is a bit ridiculous. But we are actors, right? Aren't we also playing fictional characters and their lives? So, I don't think there is anything wrong with my understanding. And, indeed Actually, it was because of this dream, and after I finished this dream, I told myself: Xu Xin, since you choose to change your way of life, then... you should grow up."

   "So there is the script of "Not Drunk"?"

"right."

  Xu Xin responded and picked up the wine glass again.

   Seeing this, Liu Yifei also took the initiative to pick up the wine glass...

   "Are you still drinking? This wine is quite strong."

  Hearing this voice of concern, she shook her head slightly:

   "You have stories, I have wine. Stronger... just right."

   "...?"

  As soon as these words came out, Xu Xin showed surprise as if meeting her for the first time.

   can meet those eyes...

  Finally, he chose to smile freely:

   "Well, the story is wine...then wish our friendship last forever."

"Ding."

  The cup hit another place.

  After drinking it all in one gulp, the smoke gushes out along with the spicy alcohol.

  Liu Yifei smelled this... breath again.

  It smells really good.

  It is different from the smell of ordinary people smoking.

  Her thoughts jumped a little.

but…

  This time, she took the initiative to pour wine for the two of them.

   I also hoped that the ice cubes had melted and shrunk a lot, and each added a piece of ice.

"Then what?"

   "And then..."

   Leaning on the sofa, the mixture of Moutai and whiskey made his consciousness appear in a trance.

   "I got to know her."

   "... Honey?"

   "Hmm...hehe."

   Speaking of his wife, he inevitably had a kind of...

   At a glance, people can tell how much he loves that woman's smile.

   "..."

"But that's not the point. The point is that although "Not Drunk" is only thirteen minutes long. But after filming all of it...I understood: Well, sure enough, I like this job....It was also from then on that I In a real sense, choosing the job of directing has become my lifelong career."

  The topic circled around and came back again:

   "Look, this is what I mean to you. I do this job because I like it. I really like this job...I'm a director and you're an actor. You...but Liu Yifei!"

   "..."

  For some reason, the sudden, slightly abrupt last sentence made Liu Yifei feel a little...

  Strange emotions.

  She heard the longing.

   I heard regret.

  I also heard a kind of... anger and indisputable taste.

   And a...may be the illusion of drunkenness, or other distressed...

   All of a sudden, her emotions showed signs of breaking the embankment.

  And in order to prevent this emotion from spreading...

  She shook her head and picked up her glass again.

   Drank the drink by yourself.

  Smoky flavor of sherry barrel, leather taste.

  The sweetness of preserved fruit...

   And the spicyness that hits the forehead at the end.

   It made her eye sockets slightly red.

fine.

  The lights are enchanting at this moment.

   bleak.

   gave her the best possible cover.

   And Xu Xin didn't notice her movements, and he didn't even notice that there was anything wrong with his tone.

  Because in essence, what he wants to express is the meaning of the following passage:

"I am the director. In my film, Liu Yifei can only be a puppet in my hands. You, Liang Bingning, Wang Zhiwen... all the actors, crew members, and the final person in charge are me. Because I am Director, I am the soul of the whole play... Do you know how much sense of accomplishment this job brings me as the master?"

  This is what he wants to express.

  So, he didn't know what kind of emotional collision he had just said in Liu Yifei's heart.

  He just stated his thoughts truthfully:

"It doesn't matter how big your wrist is or how strong your dragon is. In my crew, it's a tiger, you lay down for me. It's a dragon, you curl up for me. Because I am the soul of a play! This kind of control Desire and a sense of accomplishment are one of the driving forces behind my love for this job. I am like a mastermind behind the scenes, and I can present the world in my heart to everyone at will...I think this may also be one of the charms of art Bar."

   "..."

  In Liu Yifei's silence, Xu Xin stubbed out the cigarette, looked at her and continued:

   "And Yang Mi, do you know why she is an actress?"

   "Also because you like it?"

   "No, she wants to be a big star."

"Well…"

"it is true."

  It seems to be because of drinking, so his memory is particularly clear at this moment, and he unconsciously remembered everything about the afternoon walk between the two of them in Dashilan...

"She has liked acting since she was a child, and she made up her mind to become a star. Although she often brags to me, she probably went to Tsinghua University if she didn't act... But it is true, she really loves this industry. She wants to be That kind of big star that everyone is looking forward to, and in order to become this kind of person, first of all, she knows that she must continue her own job, that is, an actor. There must be enough works to be remembered... and only after having these can she become a A big star. According to her words, bad acting skills, at best a star. Before becoming a big star, one must first be a good actor. This is her understanding~"

"Well…"

   "Do you know why I told you this?"

"…Why?"

   "Because I think you got lost."

   "..."

"I don't know whether you want to be a star or a big star. But I really feel that you are lost and deviated from the path. Of course, you can also think that I am preaching...but more, I think it is as a The intuition of a famous director. You give me the feeling...a bit similar to Shang Zhongyong. It seems...you have nothing to remember except "Tianlong", "Sword" and "Sculpture".

And now you are in the Hong Kong circle, and what are you doing... In essence, you are still staring at those big productions or what are you doing... In all honesty, the feeling you give me is, Whatever you play is Liu Yifei. Do you know what I mean? "

  Under the drunk eyes, there is a factual statement that Liu Yifei is most powerless to refute.

"Others say you can't jump out of the frame of a fairy sister... Actually, I don't think so. It's not that you can't jump out of the frame of a fairy sister, but you can't jump out of your own frame. No matter what you play, you are still Liu Yifei .It's...sad. Because...I don't know how many years you can consume yourself. But if this continues...you may be just Liu Yifei in your life.

   And in ten or twenty years, maybe you will still have a market. But...you are still Liu Yifei. It's just that Liu Yifei, who lives in the memory of this generation's growth, was ignorantly dreamed up by everyone... If you don't pursue changes, it will really be too late. These are the most truthful words I want to say to you after going around such a big circle. "

  The drunkenness in Xu Xin's eyes faded temporarily.

  Looking at the girl in front of him, he spoke from the bottom of his heart:

"To observe, to understand, to feel, to bravely go out of your comfort zone. I believe in a sentence that director Zhang said to me, which is called: Art must be deeply rooted in the soil called the people. Without the soil, art is doomed to be a castle in the air, a flashy thing.

  You're...that's how I feel now. I don't know what you want to pursue as an actor...but...even for Yang Mi, she knows it very well. Before becoming a big star, she had to be an actress first. And as an actress, what she wants is for people to forget her name, forget her fame, and forget everything about her when they see her performance.

  She dedicates everything to the role she plays, which is her highest respect to the audience. And in the same way, if the audience can completely forget her as a person and only remember the role she plays, that is also the highest courtesy the audience can give her. In business, she wants everyone to remember her name. But in movies and TV shows, she hopes everyone will forget her.

   This is the path she is taking now... I don't know if this path is of reference to you... But as a friend, I think even if you don't use it, don't go... But it is okay to use it for reference. "

   Speaking of this, he looked at Liu Yifei who was in deep thought...

   I don’t continue to say more.

   Instead, he picked up his cup.

  After finishing the drink in one gulp, he let out a long sigh of relief.

  The breath once again brushed the tip of Liu Yifei's nose who was sideways and silent.

   Her nose moved...

  Because of his words, his overwhelmed rationality caught the signal of this breath.

  No tobacco smell.

but…

  It smells good.

  (end of this chapter)