I Raised Him Modestly, But He Came Back Obsessed With Me

Inside the quiet room, Chersenia, surprised by the low voice that split through the air, quickly lifted her hand. Her heart was pounding like she was caught doing something bad.

‘No? I’m not doing anything wrong.’

The only sin that she did was to put him to sleep because he cannot sleep easily. This is rather a good deed of hers that should be thanked.

‘Yeah. Right.’

Chersenia nodded at her thoughts. It’s never something that a thief would do. Ben had only rubbed his two eyes, as if trying to tell whether he was already awake or whether this is still a dream.

“Sleep some more.”

A blunt tone to hide her anxiety popped out from Chersenia’s lips. When he heard her voice, Ben smiled with a twist on his eyes to see if it was real. Chersenia felt like a scoundrel who touched an innocent child when Ben showed her such pure smile.

“It’s because you seem troubled in your sleep.”

Chersenia said that first even before Ben had even asked. Like a sinner’s acting with a confession before the court.

“Yes. Chersenia’s hands are always warm.”

He was still smiling, not caring of how Chersenia would feel.

“Oh yeah?”

“The hands you pat me with every night are always warm like Chersenia.”

The sound of her eyes widened.

‘What, did you know?’

She only knew that he was growing up… . It was embarrassing.

“Sorry, I pretended to sleep on purpose…”1

“What?”

“I’m very thankful.”

Ben leaned over his hands, lying on the floor, on her hands. Her body trembled at the sudden contact.

“Thanks to Chersenia, I was able to sleep comfortably.”1

Ben smiled at his utmost gratitude. Chersenia laughed out loud and messed Ben’s hair.

“Continue sleeping.”

She pulled her hand off him and went back to the bed and lay down. It will take quite a while until she falls asleep again. Still, if you close your eyes, you will go back to sleep.

“Yes, Chersenia, too….”

Chersenia closed her eyes, listening to Ben’s trembling voice. Ben looked at the bed that Chersenia was lying on. His heart pounded quickly.

‘What, what… ‘

Something different blazed in his eyes. His forehead, which had been lightly touched by Chersenia’s hand, was as hot as if it had been burned. Slowly, he raised his hand and smoothed the hair she had swept over. He shrieked as if she had a thrill on her fingertips. His cheeks flamed up with the thought of her. He was surprised and grabbed his heart that was beating fast. But it did not calm down easily.

Long after that, he heard a sound of gasping breath from the bed as Chersenia was asleep. But Ben couldn’t sleep until then. Rather, his heart was beating even faster at the sound of Chersenia’s breathing.

***

“I’m trimming your bangs just a little.”

“Yes, it’s okay. “

Chersenia tried to reassure him because he might be anxious, but it was counterproductive.

Ben’s eyes were shivering, like they lost their focus. He looked like he couldn’t sleep well at night too. Chersenia, lowering the scissors she was holding then asked him.

“Are you alright? Should I just leave it alone?”

“No! It’s okay. Cut it, please.”

“Then just keep your legs still. Let go. I can’t cut it like this.”

Since he was nervous, he was shaking his legs and she couldn’t trim his hair. Ben looked down at his leg and stopped in surprise. Judging from the look on his face, it’s clear that he didn’t even know he was shaking his legs.

Today, Chersenia is going to cut off Ben’s bangs that have been covering his eyes. She had been sitting in the yard since morning and holding scissors, and she was nervous about what was disturbing him very much. Chersenia was a little worried to see Ben this restless.

Are you afraid of getting a scar on your face because of the scissors? If he had a rough past, he might have had a trauma or had been hurt by scissors.

“If you’re scared of scissors….”

“Oh, never! “

“Really?”

Suspicious, she glanced at Ben. Ben answered with a fierce nod.

“Yes, really. I’m sorry. Please cut off the bang, Chersenia. “

Ben’s eyelids closed gently. Then Chersenia took Ben’s head in relief.

Flinch. Ben flinched again like an electricity was on again. Hng, his cheeks were red in an instant. Chersenia was embarrassed and put her hand down again.

“Are you really okay? You got a fever, huh?”

Chersenia’s hand touched Ben’s forehead. Then Ben jumped out of his seat, much more anxious than before.1

“Ben, are you sure you’re okay?”

He was looking into the air, cooling his face with a hand fan in the heat of the hot weather. After that, he went back and forth in the yard to see if he could calm himself down. Chersenia grabbed him by the shoulder with anxiety.

“Argh!”

The startled Ben plopped down on the floor with a groan.

“What’s wrong with you? Are you sick?”

Chersenia crouched down to meet him at eye level. Ben curled up with his knees in his arms. Ben’s ears were ripe with a red blush. Ben buried his head deep into his knee as Chersenia tried to make eye contact to see how he looked.

“Why don’t you say it right away?”

How many times have I asked you if you’re okay? Patience was reaching its limit in Chersenia’s heart.

Ben slowly raised his head to see her as he noticed a colder voice unlike before. Chersenia looked at Ben’s wandering eyes. He didn’t look sick or anything. Ben moved his lips as if to say something. But the sound didn’t come out of his mouth again. Chersenia glared at him with a force in her eyes.

Ben’s shoulders flinched. He finally opened his mouth because he knew she’d really be angry if he didn’t say it now.

“My, my heart keeps…”

“Heart? Does your heart hurt?”

At the sound of the heart, Chersenia asked back with a loss at her end. Isn’t it a big deal if your heart hurts? Ben shook his head and said again, thinking about her taking him to the medical center.

“No… my heart is beating so fast. Let’s go on…. “

“The heart? Why?”

Neither of them seemed to know. There was a silence between them. The morning wind blew in the yard. It was a hot summer, but the morning wind in the forest cabin was quite chilly. Ben repeatedly breathed and exhaled as much as his crouching body would need to calm his heart.

Chersenia looked at Ben, who was trying to calm down. The red-ripened cheeks on Ben’s face were returning to their original colors.

‘I guess you’ve calmed down a little after a while of cold air.’

His red ears were still there though.

‘How do you know if you have a heart attack?’

Is it because he has been overworked? If you do this already at a young age, you’ll have a hard life when you’re older.

Chersenia was worrying over nonsense.

“I’m really fine now. Please cut it this time.”

Ben got up first and sat down in the chair. Chersenia looked Ben in place and checked on him. She was just checking to see if he was really okay.

“Please take good care of my hair.”

He closed his eyes with a smile. As the sun sank on Ben’s face, his pale skin twinkled. He really seemed to be alright? Chersenia got up with her knees straightened and approached Ben.

“This time I’m really cutting it.”

“Yes, please.”

She grabbed his bangs as carefully as she could in case he flinched again. This time, Ben didn’t respond much to whether he was fully prepared. Chersenia clicked the scissors she was holding.

Cut, cut.

Black hair fell off through a pair of scissors. His hidden eyebrows were revealed when the hair covering his eyes was cut off. If she cut it wrong or just half heartedly, he would look bitter, so she focused as much as she could and carefully scissor it. His bangs became his eyes arch-closed length. Thanks to this, his long and neat eyelashes under his eyelids were clearly revealed. If you touch it, it will feel like a fine thread.

‘You’re so handsome.’

The haircut made his figure look much sharper. He still lacked a little flesh on his face, but he seemed like a young man who was a little bit sick. He’ll be even more handsome once he gets well. It was only a pity that she could not watch his change by his side.

“Are you all set, Chersenia?”

As she was drowning in awe of his appearance, Ben’s voice flashed into her mind.

“Uh, uh, wait.”

Chersenia hurriedly stepped back two steps to check the symmetry of his bangs. It was her first time doing beauty care, but it was successful. She pulled her sleeve and brushed Ben’s hair off his face roughly.

“Okay, take a look. “

She held out the mirror she was holding to Ben when he opened his eyes.

“You’re alright with it?”

She asked with a satisfied look of satisfaction. Ben smiled at himself without even checking the mirror she had given him.

“Yes, it’s pretty.”

The edges of his eyes curved in a crescent shape. The sudden burst of laughter made her heart ache. It was evident that a smile has magical powers that can disarm a person. Otherwise her heart can’t be beating like this. But he didn’t even look at a mirror, so what is pretty?

“You have to look at the mirror.”

Chersenia raised Ben’s hand holding the mirror. Unable to overcome the touch, Ben checked upon himself in the mirror. Ben touched his bangs with his hands after feeling awkward with his short hair.

“Not much into it?”

“No. The hand that Chersenia was holding is still warm.”

Ben bowed his head at the end of the remark. His face was flaming red again. She had to feel a stabbing pain in her chest. The situation now was very embarrassing and awkward. Maybe the one with myocardial infarction isn’t Ben, but herself. She couldn’t understand why her healthy heart was suddenly like this.

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“Alright, you have to eat.”

She wanted to escape this ticklish atmosphere so Chersenia quickly turned around and headed into the house.

“I’ll help you, too!”

She heard a hurried sound of footsteps from behind.