30 – Vanessa

I wonder when it started.

I can’t remember it well. However, from a very young age, she learned how to fight.

It wasn’t that she disliked it.

Her father guarded the vast northern territory, and the divine beings who followed him. They gave her a sword from the moment she could walk.

When she swung the sword, they watched with eyes filled with interest and affection, patting their heads.

“Because the north is more dangerous than any other place in the empire, it’s safer than anywhere else,” her father and his divine beings used to say.

They were friends and comrades before being a lord and his divine beings. Growing up, she always heard that they couldn’t afford to fight each other because it was the most dangerous place in the empire.

Warriors wielding swords, builders calculating how to build walls, and even farmers cultivating crops—everyone was both the sword and the shield for one another.

Her father and uncles hoped that she would become a brilliant and powerful sword more than anyone else.

She simply enjoyed receiving praise.

She swung her sword and meditated. Her hands had calluses, and her body often ached from training, but it was all good.

She didn’t feel the burden. She grew up in such an excellent environment and was too courageous for that.

Even when they trained until blood was drawn, once the training ended, they would shake hands with each other. All the accumulated anger and guilt disappeared in an instant.

She even had an innate talent.

Day by day, her black sword efficiently transformed. Day by day, she discerned the movements of her opponents with precision.

Thus, the daughter of the Northern Duke steadily grew as the anticipated rising star, earning the admiration of all.

Finally, when she sprouted and defeated a monster for the first time, thunderous applause erupted – a storm of claps.

The trembling heart after the first kill. The emotions that washed over after the battle’s end. All of it was cleansed by applause and cheers.

And then, as her mind cooled, a sudden thought occurred.

“…Is it okay to live like this?”

She hadn’t particularly complained about the way of life until now.

No, it could even be described as familiar, smooth, and a comfortable path.

Fighting monsters? She never thought she would die. She had talent.

It wasn’t arrogance or conceit about herself. It was closer to an accurate assessment.

If she followed orders, praise was given.

If she followed orders, cheers poured in.

If she followed orders, she faced no failures.

However, does that mean it’s okay to live without any thoughts?

Just fighting like this without any thoughts, receiving praise, fighting, receiving cheers, and fighting again – is such a life without any problems?

With such thoughts, she somehow found herself reading a romance novel that dealt with events unfolding in the imperial capital.

A woman receives help, consideration, and protection from a man.

The man goes mad for the woman, does everything for her like a servant.

“…What’s this?”

She threw the romance novel away. What is this? Foolish.

However, she picked up the novel she had tossed aside and read it again.

A man entangled with a woman and a woman who can do nothing without a man seemed strange and foolish – yet, it was truly different.

There was no steel. No blood. There was no daily struggle for life and against life.

Instead, there were balls. Various parties and events happening for trivial reasons, politics, and meetings – these were her struggles, everyday battles.

It was a completely different scene from her daily life.

Of course, just because she had seen such a thing, it didn’t mean she denied her life up to this point.

Her life was a trajectory she, herself, and her surroundings had built, and denying that meant negating her very soul.

But being satisfied with her current life, saying that she embraced it positively and lived confidently…

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“There’s no reason not to be interested.”

She was curious about a life entirely different from her own. She had interest and admiration.

In places where others didn’t look, she secretly collected novels dealing with the imperial social circles.

In front of others, she always appeared as a genius. As a knight. And as the heiress to everything in the North.

She continued her life like that.

And in the process, cheers piled up. Praises piled up. Achievements piled up.

Everyone marveled at what she had accomplished, and everyone had faith in her abilities.

Everything was fine. Everything was good, but…

“Why is it that I’ve never heard anyone say they’ll protect me in my life?”

There were countless people who expressed gratitude for what she had done for them.

There were countless people who looked at her growth and praised her.

But, ironically, she had never experienced someone saying they would protect her.

“In romance novels, the male protagonist usually steps up to protect the heroine.”

Of course, the heroine in romance novels and she were different. She had no desire to become like her. But… couldn’t someone step up to protect her at least once?

And when she reached the level of an expert at the age of fifteen, she finally realized.

“Oh, it’s because I’m just too strong to have someone protect me.”

Her father and uncles, as usual, praised the ‘genius’ and patted her on the back.

“You’ll be the successor to the North, so you should know how the North operates. Travel around the North and see what’s going on.”

Her father entrusted her with a mission, his eyes full of trust.

Of course, she accepted the mission, but… deep inside, she thought.

“…Father. I’m fifteen. I’m a girl. Haven’t you considered it might be dangerous?”

I know. Now that she had become a sword expert, no civilian dared to challenge her. Even if an ordinary person tried to wield a weapon, she could probably defeat them barehanded.

In the constant reassurance of limitless trust, she felt a subtle sense of satisfaction.

Eventually, she brushed aside the ambiguous feelings and proceeded with the mission. It might be bothersome, but what could she do?

Then, in the midst of it all, she was discovered by a sorcerer.

“What’s this?”

Surprised.

“Are you spying on me?”

Very surprised.

The sorcerer in front of her was an expert like herself, but… incomparably stronger, more powerful than she was.

“What the hell. What should I do about this? I never thought something like this would happen.”

Cold sweat ran down her face, despite her efforts to maintain composure.

Fortunately, the sorcerer didn’t seem to have any intention of attacking her.

But as a consequence, for the first time, the debt was erased.

“It feels strange. Really.”

Hearing words of acknowledgment was also a first.

“Oh, thank you. Excuse me, but there are many monsters on my side too. Can I ask for your help?”

Or maybe, “Wow, you’ve grown so much. I’m proud of you.”

Thank you, she thought.

It wasn’t the romantic novel-like phrase she secretly admired, but it had a decent resonance.

As she pondered on that,

It appeared.

No, saying it appeared wouldn’t be accurate. Rather, it was more appropriate to say it ‘loomed.’

The Black Ocean.

Countless heroes from legends themselves couldn’t find a way to oppose the Black Ocean; they perished.

Death itself. Fear itself. Myth itself.

A thousand years had passed since the last demon king’s bloodline was severed, and it was reasonable to believe that there were no creatures beyond the Black Ocean.

For the first time, she felt the reality of death.

A sensation she had never experienced even when killing countless monsters—an awareness of death.

That feeling pushed her to the brink of madness just before succumbing.

“No… we are definitely going to die. There is no way to resist any longer…”

Because of that, she showed an embarrassing sight. Giving up before even trying, accepting death.

The wizard could not tolerate that.

Slap. A sensation spread from her cheek.

Just a moment ago, what was she thinking?

The successor from the north. The future duke who was the subject of many people’s expectations. Trying to give up before dying?

She took a deep breath.

Closed her eyes tightly, opened them again. And looked at the wizard.

…Yes. It’s too early to give up. She regained her determination.

The wizard who restored her determination recited a spell. Without giving up on the theme of bleeding from every hole in her eyes, nose, ears, and attached to her head… he built a barrier.

The tentacles of the Black Ocean disappeared.

The tentacles that had rushed before they could be made to disappear, she overcame herself.

If she had sat still earlier, she wouldn’t have succeeded.

Finally, after the Black Ocean disappeared, the wizard collapsed.

The man who ‘protected’ her for the first time was on the verge of death.

She lifted the man. And started running towards the mansion.

The first thought about the man who protected her was ironically that she had to keep him alive.

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