Director’s Legend

"The audience in front of the TV, let's see who is coming today, oh, now the most popular director in Hollywood, setting off a global dreaming boom, Shao from China! A 22-year-old genius, a Hollywood genius!" Although the award ceremony was shabby, it was broadcast live on TV, and the ratings have always been not bad.

The host chattered and introduced that Shao Shuaijun who jumped off the truck just now: "Shao started filming at the age of eighteen. Many of our directors, such as Chris Hayward, were probably still playing in mud at that time. Shao had already shot The "Buried Alive" that made people beat the scene."

While Shao Shuaijun was still looking back and talking to the people in the truck, the host was verbose again: "It is said that he also made a movie copying Gary Garych's "Two Big Smokers". From this point of view, His actions are still faster than Chris Sievert. Wow, look, Shao is here. It's really a jade tree, windy and cool. If he can be a little taller, I think he will definitely be fascinated. Little girl in junior high school, haha."

Shao Shuaijun walked slowly on the two rotten red carpet with his hands in his pockets. He occasionally stretched out his hand and waved his hand around. Many reporters came today, even the domestic reporter Shao Shuaijun saw it. So he said hello in Chinese: "Hello, hard work, I have to travel for the New Year."

Without seeing the logo on the microphone, these Chinese reporters, who seemed to be from Hong Kong, responded loudly in crappy Mandarin: "Director Shao, can you give time for an interview later?"

"If I don't win the prize today, maybe I'm in a good mood and I'll accept your interview. They." Shao Shuaijun pointed his finger at the host who came over, "If they congratulate me, I guess I won't be in the mood to accept the interview."

The host didn’t know what Shao Shuaijun said, even if he knew it, he didn’t care. Jin Suanmei was always known for sarcasm and spoof: "Hi, Shao, can you say hello to our camera?"

Before Shao Shuaijun could answer, the host shouted into the camera: "Audiences, look, the director of the bad film, Shao, wants to say hello to you."

Shao Shuaijun smashed it, smashed his mouth, and felt a little bit unable to answer the conversation. The director of a bad movie, this name...

"Hi, hello, and you, crappy host."

The host is a wretched white man, laughing: "Thank you for your compliment, I feel very happy to see you angry. Wow, quietly, Shao's car is really cool, is it a two-door convertible heavy sports car? Is that Bumblebee (the robot in Transformers) or Optimus Prime? What are you going to do, do you want to save the earth, haha, you are not Shian LaBeouf (the Transformers hero), even though you are as short as you?"

Shao Shuaijun raised his eyebrows: "Maybe it's Megatron, you know, they always want to occupy the earth, just like you always want to replace Oscars, but in the end they will all be funny."

"Haha, we don't bother with Oscars. They are clowns who are sensational. We are the formal judges."

"I think I will hear this tomorrow too, at the Kodak Theater." The Kodak Theater is where the Oscars ceremony was held. The host ridiculed him, and Shao Shuaijun used this to ridicule the golden plum.

The host shrugged his shoulders and said, "So, what did you come for today? Oh, you came to get the bad film and the bad director award, right? You see how good you are in a bad car."

"I don’t have this purpose. In fact, I heard that Lindsay Lohan is coming too. I want to talk to her about life. You know that I also have a lot of passion for American beauties. It’s not here to listen to your chattering noise. Let’s go, don’t stand stupid, I can’t wait to see Lindsey."

Lindsay Lohan is a popular American actress. She was born as a child star. Since this year, she has suddenly become the queen of Hollywood topics, and her private life is chaotic. This year's Golden Plum Awards, she received two nominations for the worst actress and worst screen partner.

"Lindsey is embarrassed to come."

"Really, I'm the only one to attend the Golden Plum Awards today, oh, it's a real drop in price."

The two of them quarreled and entered the movie theater awards scene. The American audiences in front of the live TV screens are all happy, and the Golden Plum Award is always cute. When Shao Shuaijun sat down in a chair, the ceremony began, and that kind of irony was called real irony. The first speech at the ceremony smashed all the nominees and movies.

For example, "Linsey Lohan is a'mean girl' (the movie she once starred in, "Chris Hayward was not able to copy homework when he was a child", "Eddie Murphy should go to a mental hospital, The medicine cannot be stopped", "Why is "Suspected Kill" not called "Human Skin Chainsaw"" and so on.

Shao Shuaijun was not bad, only two sentences of "The Night Watcher" were lost, which made people confused and didn't dig deep. It may be that Shao Shuaijun was willing to attend, and he was afraid of scaring Shao Shuaijun away. We must know that the hot craze of "Inception" has not yet receded, and with the help of Shao Shuaijun, it can draw a lot of ratings.

Soon, two well-known comedians began to award awards: "The worst sequel is... "Instinct 2", wow, well deserved..."

"The worst horror film is..."Double Suspect", let us congratulate Chris Sievert, even though he has made it clear that he will never accept the award. He is so hypocritical and shy, knowing himself. Today it is possible to win the Grand Slam, even surpass the outstanding monumental achievements of the predecessors, copy the glory of Paul Van Hewen's seven awards for the golden plum, but hide at home and act like a baby to his mother..."

"Double Sided Murder" was accused of plagiarizing "Human Skin Inn", "Saw Cry" and "Patti Duke Show". The director firmly denied it and refused to accept the award.

"The one who won the Worst Plagiarism Award is... "Double Suspect", wow, I really want to ask Chris, why isn't the movie called "Human Skin Chainsaw"? Well, he has won two awards , I have a hunch that he will steal Shao's limelight tonight..."

The camera immediately turned to Shao Shuaijun, and then the host took the microphone and pointed at Shao Shuaijun. Shao Shuaijun shrugged in coordination: "We Chinese are always humble. I welcome Director Chris to steal my limelight. The worst director was taken away."

"Our Chris is said to be a generous person. He has nine nominations and leads this year's golden plum. Maybe he doesn't mind giving up one or two awards to entertain Chinese Shao."

Shao Shuaijun's face turned black and did not speak.

Spoof, oh, the awards continue: "The one who won the Worst Makeup Award..."Double-sided Suspect", congratulations Chris, he has won three awards..."

"The most unforgivable horror film is..."Double Suspect", which is really amazing, four consecutive titles."

"The one who won the worst script is..."Double-sided Suspect", oh, what else can I say, five consecutive championships."

Wow, as if going to the market, "Double Suspect" won five awards in a row. At this time, the award of the worst director award was finally reached.

"There are a lot of bad movies this year. I think Chris is about to break the record. He still has four nominations for worst film, worst director, worst actress, and worst screen partner, as long as he wins two more. A new record was born."

"Maybe Cheng Yaojin will be killed halfway through, so let us see if there are nominations..."

Klang Klang, a few movies flashed by on the screen.

"The one who won the Worst Director Award..." (To be continued. Please search Piaotian Literature, the novel is better and updated faster!)