December

Gosh, my aunt. The dish my aunt made was my favorite crab dish. But before I could say that it was okay, my uncle hung up the phone without saying anything. I was sorry to have disturbed them in Pohang for the last 3 years, but to be able to accept even this. I must earn a lot of money later and be a filial son to them. To do that, I should study and study.

My will suddenly flared up. The cold that I couldn’t feel because I was preoccupied suddenly hit my cheek. How many degrees was it today? It was a habit to check the weather information every morning, but today I even forgot that. I quickly shrunk my neck into the scarf, but this time I couldn’t even take a step further.

“Yeonwoo Sunbae.”

I heard his voice behind me. The moment my name was called, my heart skipped a beat, perhaps because of guilt. Maybe it was because his voice was still as soft as warm cocoa. The voice was obviously only a sound that I could only hear, but the sweetness spread to the point that my heart was soft. But at the same time, I also remembered what I had done last night. I hadn’t even dreamed of meeting him at the bus stop, so I wasn’t ready to face him yet.

“Oh, hello.”

I greeted him without making eye contact. I tried to get away quickly by twisting his body, but something caught my eye. A bandaged left hand.

“Huh? Was your burn that bad?”

I glanced down at his hands. no. He answered briefly, but it must have been out of courtesy. It was not too bad, he said, but there was no way that was the case seeing how he’d even put a bandage on it.

“Sorry. In the process of helping me…”

“It’s cold.”

It’s cold?! My eyes widened at the words because he never said he felt cold before. After all, my juniors were people too. But why did someone who was feeling cold, wear only a jumper and leave his neck naked? Unknowingly, I wanted to untie my scarf and wrap it around his neck. My hand flinched at the urge to do so, but he smiled and suggested a better way.

“Let’s go in.”

His smile was warmer than the precious midwinter sun. Unknowingly, I opened my mouth and stared blankly. I wanted to direct my gaze to his lips, but then I turned my head away. I came to my senses right away. Guilt washed over me like a wave again. I guess he deliberately changed the subject because I was worried about his hands. No matter how attracted I was to an Alpha, it was an Omega’s instinct, to imagine such a thing against such a good person…I am such a trashy person.

My goals at the library were just two. Don’t make eye contact with him. Second, open your eyes and find the Alpha high school students. However, it was difficult to find the Alpha high school student who was sleeping at school, in the library.

So the only goal I would have to focus on was the first one. Fortunately, he didn’t talk to me much today, so I didn’t even make eye contact.

Maybe that was why, there was a bit of an awkward vibe. At first, I was afraid that he might have noticed that I masturbated while imagining him, but if that was the case, he wouldn’t have looked so gentle. Strangely, he didn’t say much today, but his eyes were exceptionally warm. He couldn’t imagine how dirty my delusions were about him.

‘Senior Yeonwoo, shall we go eat?’

Scribble, a pen that was not mine moved over my notebook and carved some letters. Since I had committed such a sin, I couldn’t answer right away. I only stared at the neat letters written on my notebook, but the big, long hand next to it waited for my answer and moved again.

‘Is there a place you want to go to?’

A garbage incinerator, probably? Looking at his patiently waiting hand, I finally wrote an answer.

‘Anywhere.’

After writing, I was hungry too. I wondered if I should just go down to the basement cafeteria, but as I was about to get up I noticed that his hand was still motionless on the notebook. Why? I looked back at his face for the first time since I sat down. I hesitated. He was looking at my nape. However, his eyes were dark and deep.

In an instant, goosebumps spread through my chest. It was because of the instinctive wariness of exposing my nape to an Alpha, but also because his expression and eyes were the same as they were in my imagination. The goosebumps were accompanied by a strange pounding. I involuntarily stopped breathing.

I shuddered and raised my eyes. For a moment, our eyes met, but he turned his head first and stood up. I was supposed to follow, but I couldn’t get up right away from the intensity of the gaze that briefly met mine. Even though it was fleeting, my heart sank. It looked like an Alpha’s ruthless lust for dominance, and it sent chills down my spine.

I always knew that he was an Alpha and a dominant Alpha at that, and I thought I was being careful, but I guess it wasn’t like that at all. Just like he had needles in his eyes, it felt like a sharp prick. It was a wariness that had become complacent before I knew it, as he returned with warm eyes as if it was a misunderstanding. So I wondered if I had seen it wrong.

“Are you leaving at 5 today?”

I was eating twice as fast, as usual, to cut down on the time I had to face him. I was almost done when I heard a question. I quickly swallowed the rice that hadn’t entered my mouth. My throat hurt as if a large stone had been thrown over it.

“…Hm, yes.”

“You must have been hungry.”

It was true, so I answered yes and stuffed the remaining spoonful of rice into my mouth. Now that I was done eating…I found that there was still 1/3 of the rice left on Kim Shin’s plate. Only then did I realize…No matter how fast I ate, he still had to eat everything for me to get up. Am I stupid? He recommended, perhaps misunderstanding that I was staring blankly at his plate.

“Would you like more?”

“No! It’s fine! How can I take my Hoobae’s food?”

Kim Shin curled his lips.

“If you don’t want to, then at least don’t call me like that.”

“Are you uncomfortable with being called Hoobae?”

“Yes.”

He put a spoonful of rice into his mouth and nodded his head broadly. I quickly lowered my eyes because he looked so cute. Then, this time, I saw his left hand wrapped in bandages, which were resting on the table. The only title I could call him was Hoobae anyway. You got hurt because of me, but I couldn’t make you more uncomfortable.

“What shall I call you?”

“My name.”

Ah, his name.

“Do you remember my name?”

Of course, everyone remembered.  Anyone who had seen him once would never forget him. Even after decades, I would be someone who could boast that I met a dominant Alpha named Kim Shin before.

“Then, from now on, I will call you Kim Shin Hoobae.”

Kim Shin stared at me and muttered to himself.

“It will be hard for you to say.”

“That’s why I prefer not calling you like that.”

Haha, he laughed briefly and moved the spoon again.

“Doesn’t it make you more competitive because it’s difficult?”

“Ignore it if it does. You don’t have to spend your energy on trivial things.”

It was advice from a Sunbae, but Kim Shin put the rice topped with rice in his mouth and replied lightly.

“It isn’t trivial.”

I didn’t understand the answer for a while, so I stared at his meal blankly, but when I belatedly grasped the meaning, a fever rose to my face. Since I’m a senior at school, it must have been just a courtesy. I tried to suppress my embarrassment and averted my gaze.

It was lunchtime, so there were quite a few people in the restaurant, but I looked around as if I had realized it now. I noticed that some people were glancing at me. Of course, what they were looking at was Kim Shin Hoobae. When I realized that his presence was different than mine, I felt a sense of distance.

“But why do you need to go at 5:00?”

“I just have some work to do.”

Perhaps because of the distance I just felt, I tried not to reveal my information, but the ensuing question was too much.

“Do you have a part-time job?”

“…Yes.”

“I need a part-time job too.”

I was surprised by his words, so I checked the clothes he was wearing today without realizing it. He came wearing different outerwear each time. Today, it was a black jumper with a hat, and the quality looked very good. Even if it wasn’t for the clothes, he was the dominant Alpha, so of course he was considered to be rich or a son of a wealthy family.

“Pay is not strong. It will be easier to find students to tutor, so you can look for that.”

“Tutoring doesn’t suit me. The way I teach is a bit…”

In what way? To my bewilderment, he answered lightly.

“I hit them sometimes.”

“…It is a way that doesn’t work in the business world nowadays.”

Kim Shin didn’t say much, but he curled his lips with his eyes shining again as if he was joking. I looked away trying to resist the urge to keep talking to him. Then his request came.

“If you need someone to work part-time, let me know.”

Even if he didn’t have a job, it was clear that he was an Alpha, dominant at that, and a student at W University. The boss could even give the title of being the owner of the cafe.

“Well, okay.”

I was vague and avoided answering. Fortunately, he had finished his meal, so there was no need to say anything more about the part-time job. Now, I should hurry to the study room and avoid seeing each other…

“Do you want to have some coffee?”

I paused and quickly shook my head.

“I am fine.”

“I want to drink coffee though.”

Kim Shin said with a smile.

“Please buy it for me.”

It was a smile that could make me buy an apartment for him.

Perhaps he was worried about my wallet, so he asked me to drink coffee on the 4th floor, so I went up without thinking and stopped at the entrance. I saw a white table and blue chairs. Indeed, last night’s imagination wasn’t that long, but when I saw the same place, my face suddenly became hot. Then, when he sat down on that chair with coffee…

“Yeonwoo Sunbae.”

When I stopped, he called me, but I couldn’t face him.

“Let’s go to the cafe on the first floor. The juice there, the fruit juice was really good.”

Kim Shin looked at me strangely, but I quickly turned around and headed for the central staircase. The cafe on the first floor was definitely better. With more than 10,000 won, I was able to defeat even my most intense delusion. While drinking the sweet and expensive juice, at first I only answered yes to his intermittent words, but by the time I finished drinking it was awkward, however, I noticed how I was smiling while looking at him.

It was always like that when I was with him. No matter how high my boundary was at first, over time, I would end up focusing on the other person. It was to the extent that when I said I was going to the bathroom on my way to the study room, he followed me without thinking about it. But he hesitated. I didn’t see him stop and headed for the bathroom entrance, only to notice it belatedly and turn around.

“Why?”

“I will go later.”

Kim Shin turned his head and answered, then turned around and went to the study room. However, his face was red. I also felt ashamed of something. Oh, were you embarrassed to look at me because you remembered what happened in the bathroom yesterday? But I was fine now. I should forget about it. He probably didn’t even fantasize about doing naughty things in the bathroom like I did. Just when I remembered my fantasies…everything from last night rushed into my mind. I was pure trash.

Whether it was because I wanted to be worthy despite being trash, I was particularly hungry due to all the hard work I did after. Fortunately, during the break, the sous chef gave me an errand, so I headed to the convenience store. I met a familiar face. The Grandpa with the digestive drink from that way was still staring out the window today. Fortunately, he already had a digestive drink in his hand today.