Craving Temptation: Love Of A Vampire

...Anastasia...

As a human, I have never been good with making decisions; if I thought immortality would make it any different, then I am sadly mistaken. Of course, being made to chose between the man you love and your best friend should be easy. But if you are furious at the man you wanted to spend your life with, then it poses somewhat of a problem.

If Sebastian is wondering if I can remember, I can remember every single moment. I watched him naked with another woman in our bed. Yes, she was a shapeshifter, but Sebastian should know the touch of my skin, the sweetness of my lips, and the scent of my body. Is he so blinded by feeling passion and ecstasy that he will fail even to notice the smallest of things?

But that is not all that I can remember; the rage overtook me so rapidly that I was completely blinded by it. It started off as a trickle of a tingle inside my chest. The more I saw his lips move, the more that trickle grew. It became a rumble, then a terrifying roar. By the time I was squeezing the life from him, it was a raging animal that consumed every cell in my body.

And if that was not horrifying enough, my body changed into this grotesque Vampire. Now, if the truth is to be told, it was the most excruciating pain I have ever felt in my life. As a doctor, I know how every part of your body moves; as every bone and muscle bent, I knew exactly what was happening to my body.

With this being said, I did try with every fiber to fight this monster, but what I felt was beyond what was rational. I saw through my own eyes as I tried to kill the man that I love, and I had no control over it. Should I not have been injured, I am afraid to say that I would have for certain ended his life.

Now I have Sebastian and Zachariah standing next to me, and I am being asked with who I want to remain. It is at a time such as this that I truly wish that I did not become a Vampire.

This being said, I shall need a few moments to speak to each to help me decide what shall be the largest decision I shall have to make for eternity.

"Please may I have a word with Zachariah alone?"

I watch as Sebastian reluctantly leaves the room with Breyden by his side. I see both fear and anger lie within his eyes. Fear that he might lose me and anger that he might lose me to Zachariah.

So without further hesitation, Zachariah takes a seat next to me on the bed.

"Zachariah, I shall forever be grateful for what you have done for me today. You truly have gone beyond what a friend should do for another."

"No thanks needed, Anastasia. I fear to think what would have happened to you should none of us been able to help you. That is why I insist that you return home with me."

"I do understand your concern. The thing is, you shall perish and leave my life. I do not think I can bear to be alone."

"How would we even know how to find such a thing?"

I watch as Zachariah chuckles at me, for I have indeed asked such a silly question. Of course, the man would know.

"You forget I am a Vampire Hunter."

"But that is just the problem. No one shall approve that you have a Vampire living with you. You are supposed to be the one that kills them, not looking after them."

"Anastasia, let us not wonder about that now; my only concern is for you to be safe."

"But then tell me this, how are you going to feel if I have to kill another human to feed?"

I see him struggle with this choice; he will have to make to turn a blind eye when I take the life of a human. The very ones that he is here to protect.

"That shall just be something I have to come to terms with. But that being said, I would like to believe that you shall not be reckless."

"Have you ever known me to be reckless? There is one thing that does puzzle me though."

"What shall that be?"

"If you possess supernatural power, why do you not live forever?"

"It is purely to give me the strength to fight a Vampire and to heal faster than normal humans do."

"But you can still die?"

"Yes, unfortunately, that is the downside with being human."

Maybe it shall not be a bad thing if I shall remain with Zachariah, for I do know him farlonger than I know Sebastian. He might not live forever, but he shall protect me just the same as Sebastian would. And as he says, I can always find other Vampires that shall let me in once Zachariah's life has come to an end.

"Well, guess it is time to speak to the man that started this whole mess in the first place. Will you please ask him to come in on your way out?"

"I love you, Anastasia, please remember that."

And with that, Zachariah leaves the room with the very same expressions on his face, fear he might lose me and anger that I might choose Sebastian over him.

So enters the man of the hour, the man than indirectly caused all this pain and heartache, and let us not forget the death of an innocent man by both our hands. Yes, I do see that he is broken, but it is easy to feel that after the battle we have just had. And I am not only referring to the physical but the emotional part of this all. Though in saying this, I do not feel as deeply as I thought I would, I do feel somewhat cold towards the entire situation.

But the situation, no matter how cold, is one that should be taking with the utmost seriousness. And looking at this man's face, I know that this will by far be the hardest decision we both will face in our immortal life.

As he sits near to me, he goes to take my hands in his, but my very first instinct is to pull it away. The pain shoots to his face in an instant, and I know that has just been a dagger I have driven into his heart.

"My beloved, I beg for your forgiveness. Please just hear me out for a minute, then you may do whatever you wish to do with me."

"Sebastian, I am not here to hurt you. You hurt me..."

"But..."

"Let me finish, please. I am going to tell you a story. You might think such a girl like me has seen her fair share of men?"

"My beloved, you are beautiful; I can only think that many men had you on their side."

"Wrong, Sebastian, you have been my first, and I can with certainty say my last very true love."

He looks at me with a completely blank expression on his face; now, either he does not understand, or he is surprised at what I said. But let's take whom it is that we are talking to; sometimes, he has even less common sense than a rock.

"But what about the Vampire Hunter?"

"Recall I said a brief encounter, and the only thing that theHunter and I did was kiss."

"So does this mean...?"

"Yes, Sebastian."

"My god Anastasia, I am so sorry; there goes my horny ass and take advantage of you."

"Oh my god, Sebastian. Horny ass? I have never heard you said that before."

This should not be happening; I should not sit here and laugh with the man that I am supposed to hate. Yes, he has the ability to make me feel better, but it should not get me to that point where I need someone to help me feel happy again.

Now, if he thinks I want to listen to apologies, I am not. I am looking for the solutions to our problems.

"So you can see my frustration in having to deal with your lovers, for you are my only one. And I would think that your lovers would stay in the past."

"My beloved, I am afraid I did not treat women very well at the beginning of my years."

"Yes, that I do understand. But the witch, you could have stayed away from her."

"I am sorry beloved; I did not think that it would do any harm."

And that is my biggest frustration with him, he does not think, or maybe I have just come and messed up his existence. After all, he was set in his ways until he met me, for that is truly when he started to lose control over himself and his feelings. Maybe I am the problem.

"Sebastian, have you ever thought that I am the one that has brought this on you? The problem is not you and your past but me upsetting your existence?"

"I love you; whatever comes in our way is not by our own but by the obstacles that wish to tear us apart."

"Do you think that this shall happen again? Maybe not this, maybe something different?"

"I cannot tell you what the future holds, but such is life; your past shall always come to haunt you. And in saying this, mine was not always good, and I can not tell you what happens next."

"But you will not always be able to protect me, and what if you find another that you wish to be with?"

"You are the only one, my beloved. I will perish should I not have you in my life."

"But what if...?"

"There is no 'but's, what if's, why's or maybe's' that will keep me away from you. If you choose the Hunter, then my life shall end. I am in no way saying this to pain you; I am just certain of how much I love you."

"Can you leave me for a few moments alone? I shall call once I am ready."

With that, I see a man that was laughing with me only but a few minutes ago drag his feet to a door that he does not want to step through. This could easily be his very last time that he will see me, the last laugh that he will share with me, and most frighteningly, the last bond he shall share with me.

The fact is, I love both men. Zachariah is more the love of a friend. He shall do whatever he can to protect, but so Sebastian will. They both love me equally the same, but which one shall truly perish if they do not have me in their life? Though saying this, should I be with a man just because he cannot stand not having in his life? But Sebastian is willing to end his Vampire existence. He is willing to let go of the one thing that he treasures the most. His immortality.

Do I want to be the reason for a man's death? But what about Zachariah? What happens when the Vampire Hunters push him away for loving a Vampire, then will I not be ending his purpose in life and, in saying this, ultimately his life too.

So it comes down to this, they equally love me the same, and the consequences of my decision shall be equally too. But who shall I miss the most if I did not have him in my life? Now taken the lengths of my relationship with both, I should easily find my answer to this.

And with that, I call for them, for I know not one of them has moved from the door. They are stubborn; they will fight each over until the end. Now, as I see them both enter, for a very rare while they shall be the same...they are afraid, and that is what makes them men.

"I have made my decision."