Otaku man rotten goddess horse is the most annoying

Chapter 1 My Girlfriend's Name is Xiaolu

1
I went to see the house today. Although it is about half an hour’s drive away from the company, the environment is quiet and the view is good. I have used the flush toilet deliberately and found no major problems. The only regret is that the landlady’s wife does not look like Xiangzi, but she is getting better and better. The more she looks like the old lady Kashi, this makes me very opinionated.However, the monthly rent of 300 yuan is very cheap after all, so I decided to rent it because I was poor, and half an hour’s drive was nothing to me. I think it took an hour to go to work every day when I was still in my hometown. .

After the decision was made, I immediately sent a text message to Xiaolu, and Xiaolu replied: You can live wherever you want, but remember not to bring women back!I replied: Of course of course.After a while, Xiaolu's text message came again, and she said, it is not allowed to bring men!

...It really is the thinking of a rotten girl.

2
Xiaolu is my girlfriend and a senior rotten girl.There are many troubles in falling in love with rotten girls. The most important point is that the world in the eyes of rotten girls is not only composed of men and women. They can divide offense and suffering on the basis of men.Although I don't know much about these things and I don't want to know them, it seems that I am the type of man she classified as "receiving". This is too much!What's more, she actually told me without any concealment!I remember that I made a serious protest and even bluffed out saying "I don't like being treated like this", but she exhaled "So what do you want?" She said, "But it's okay if the other party is you!" At the end, she sneered and made up the last shot, "It really is a shou".

555555...

3
It's been a week since I moved into my new home, and the overall feeling is good, but I'm a little lonely, after all, I live alone.But it's okay, I have a lot of anime to watch, and a lot of manuscripts to write.The little deer only came once when I first moved in, and later refused to visit the house because of its remote location.In fact, I quite enjoyed the time when she wasn't around. When someone explained why Ming Ming had a girlfriend and didn't live together, I replied with a righteous face on the surface: "We are a pure relationship between men and women!" It would be nice to have some private space, and besides, only a small farewell can win a new love... Some people say that distance will lead to emotional estrangement, but I am [-]% at ease with Xiaolu.But she doesn't seem to be so at ease with me. Every time she sees me, she has to hold her chin and look at my buttocks carefully.

...you're totally worried about going the wrong way!
4
A while ago, I happened to read a manga "All Because of Love" by Yoshinaga, and it was surprisingly good.I happily told Xiaolu about this, and Xiaolu acted excitedly and contemptuously, and she said: "You just found out that Yoshinaga is so good, I was fascinated by her when I first watched "Western Antiques and Western Confectionery" Stay!" I said, "I was wrong, I shouldn't have taken people on the ground."

Then we started happily discussing Yoshinaga's "The Body Temperature of Semi-mature Youth" and "Attachment in a Rose Bush". She expressed a little surprise that I liked the latter, and I think it was probably because that book contained BL elements.But my thinking has changed now, I think excellent comics will never lose their color because of BL!I can't see the green hills with a blind eye!Having said that, it feels really good to have a common topic with Xiaolu, although half of this topic is danmei.

Soon Xiaolu sent me a copy of "The One-Eyed Gentleman and the Boy" by Yoshinaga, and I was stunned to death after reading it.

"What is this one? It's a basic manga! There's even H!"

"That's right! It's a base man!"

"Then you still let me see?!"

"I want to train you while you are interested in Yoshinaga! After all, you have read it all? You don't have to read it."

...Yeah, why should I read it?Hold your head.

5
Last night, I took Xiaolu to eat Treasure Ship Japanese Cuisine. The 100 yuan per person buffet is a bit expensive, but it is really delicious.When going out, the little deer opened his mouth and let out a loud "burp".I asked her if she was full, she pointed to herself and said, just answered.

I think she is so cute! ＞_＜

Thinking about it now, I am an otaku, and Xiaolu is a rotten girl. Our relationship can be so harmonious. A large part of the reason is that our interests have many commonalities. After all, we all read comics, surf the Internet, and like squatting. at home.Although the focus is different, there are still many things that can be cute together.For example, in the autumn episode of that year, we all watched "Black Butler", but I watched the fun, and she watched the rot.I'm not very fond of the original plots that are not in the comic version, but she likes it very much, especially the scene of the naked magic dog and Sebastian embracing a ball, it is really terrible.And when Greer pounced on Sebas with nosebleeds, she actually said something like "I can understand his mind"... What kind of intentions does that guy have!It's just a big pervert!Your perception is as strange as Frankie dared to put on a Super Pose without swimming trunks, and Luffy said in admiration, "He is really a man among men"!
... Having said that, I really wanted to recommend Xiaolu to watch the OP, but I was afraid that she would match my beloved Straw Hat members casually. You must know that the only girls on board are Nami and Robin, and Brooke, Frankie, Lie When Renbu and Chopper are paired up, the curiosity will make me... I will not be able to bear it...

6
I usually spend weekends at Xiaolu's house.It wasn't her house, either, and none of us were natives of the city.Xiaolu lives with her colleagues, and each person has a room. Her colleagues usually go home on weekends, so I have the opportunity to spend holidays in Xiaolu's room grandiosely.Next to Xiaolu's desktop is a small table, and I put my notebook on it. We live next to each other, each doing our own thing, influencing each other, and intersecting from time to time. It's really harmonious.

I downloaded the classic "Kung Fu Whirlwind Judo Chapter" not long ago, so I started watching it this week.It's so funny, I laughed out loud while watching it.Xiaolu suddenly said in a melancholy voice from the side: "Death base, death base." I think she probably saw the judo men rolling around in a ball, sometimes twice, sometimes three times, so she said casually: "You rotten girl, this is not a gay, and I'm not a gay either!"

Turning around, I saw Xiaolu tearing up at the motionless screen: "My computer just crashed, is there something wrong with that?"

...I'm sorry it's all my fault.

7
The aftermath of the "Kung Fu Whirlwind Judo Chapter" incident was more serious than I thought. Xiaolu ignored me for several days, which made me tense up and tried every means to find her for reconciliation.She ignored me when I invited her to dinner, so I had no choice but to go directly to her house to find her.After apologizing for a long time, she still looked very sad, and while wiping her tears with the corner of her skirt, she said: "I think you really look down on me. I didn't dislike you for being so nerdy, but you actually dislike my rot. Shi, is this a crime? I think we can’t understand each other so much, it’s meaningless to be together again, so let’s break up.”

As if I was facing a formidable enemy, I immediately hugged her tenderly and said, "Fool, I like everything about you."

"P!"

"...I don't like this."

She "puchi" laughed.A crisis was resolved warmly, and a P. -_-
8
Xiaolu was watching the Dahe drama "Tu Ji", and I was watching the extremely passionate "Tianyuan Breakthrough". It happened to be the part where Dali was cooking for everyone. Xiaolu said: "I like this girl very much." I hurriedly said I I also like it.

"She is very kind," said the little deer.

"It's a pity that I can't eat what I made." I said.

"Can't you eat it? That sashimi looks delicious."

"Huh? Do you have sashimi? No."

"Wait, what are you talking about?"

"Dali."

"I said Yu Yi!" Xiao Lu pointed at her screen.

"Oh! This is a big misunderstanding." I said.

"Dead otaku! Only cute 2D!"

"Fucking rotten girl! Look at your chips!" I retorted.

"Let's just watch it!" Xiaolu said, shutting down "Tu Ji", and double-clicking to open a basic animation that seems to have a strong taste, and I burst into tears.So even if you quarrel, you must never speak indiscriminately!
9
Or "Atsuhime".In the film, there is a man with shaved round eyebrows and a strange voice.The little deer said, "Wow, why is this man like this?"

I took a look and said, "It must be an eunuch! It must be an eunuch!"

Xiaolu said: "But aren't eunuchs a special product in China? This person may be just a bit of a bitch, not necessarily a eunuch. Look at his attire, he seems to be an onmyoji."

I said, "Speaking of which, onmyojis are actually onmyojis, right?"

Just as our topic was about to reach a more advanced level, the suspected eunuch in the film covered his mouth with a round fan and laughed "hehehe".

"It's the eunuch!" We both confirmed.

10
Xiaolu suddenly said to me on QQ: "Actually, "Journey to the West" is a gay book."

Me: "Ah, you mean to say that monk Tang and his disciples are all men and horses, right?"

Xiao Lu: "No, I just suddenly discovered that Monkey King has been suppressed by Tathagata for 500 years."

Me: "...you will be punished!"

11
It is hard to find free downloads of some domestic films on the Internet, probably because of copyright awareness or something.That day I really wanted to watch "Bathing" by director Zhang Yang, played by Jiang Wu, Zhu Xu and others, but I couldn't find it no matter what.I used the word "bath" to search, and all the content related to hygiene came out; I used "movie bath" to search, and the results came out were some bathing scenes in movies; I used "Jiang Wu takes a bath" to find I searched, and the effect was much better immediately; so I simply searched with "Zhang Yang, Jiang Wu, Zhu Xu taking a bath".At this time Xiao Lu came up behind me and asked me, "What are you searching for?" I said, "Video." Xiao Lu bit his lip and said, "Why do you insist on watching the video of these three old men taking a shower together?"

12
The uncle transferred two movie tickets to me cheaply.

Uncle is not related to me, it’s just a nickname. He is an old otaku I have known for several years. He is already 30 years old and single, so everyone calls him Uncle.However, there used to be people who slurred their speech and called them "big pigs", and were severely punished by the uncle.Having said that, I also think that person must have done it on purpose. It takes a lot of substandard Mandarin to call Big Pig, no, Uncle by mistake.

By the way, Xiaolu's screen name is Yinglu, and Xiaolu is an intimate name that only belongs to me.I asked Xiaolu about the origin of her screen name, and Xiaolu said that she really liked a girl manga artist named Sakura Xiaolu Lunoko, so she came up with such an abbreviated screen name.I admit that I had very mosaic associations when I first heard the name of this cartoonist.But having said that Xiaolu's screen name is not from the author of the base man, I am very relieved.

Finally, Xiao Lu and I went to see "Mei Lanfang".I personally like "Mei Lanfang", many plots and performances are very good.I know that Xiaolu likes this movie better, because when Yu Shaoqun was asked by her cousin to sit on someone's lap, she was so excited that she slapped my thigh.Isn't it just a thigh? As for you, I suddenly decided to eat chicken thighs for dinner.

Later, when Qiu Rubai met Mei Lanfang for the first time, he acted like it was love at first sight, which made Xiao Lu very excited. He kept telling me, "The two of them must have an affair!" I said, "Enough is enough."

Later, when the Thirteenth Grandpa gave Mei Lanfang a small statue of Guan Gong, I happily said: "Oh, there were figures in that era." Xiaolu said: "You are enough."

Seeing the correspondence between Qiu Rubai and Mei Lanfang, Xiaolu said: "It's a love letter, it must be a love letter full of lingering love!" I said: "You are enough."

When Meng Xiaodong began to sing in a male voice, I said, "Oh! It turns out that Zhaihe Miyue is Meng Xiaodong from Japan!" Xiaolu said, "You are enough."

At this time, an old man sitting behind us suddenly roared: "You are enough!"

(End of this chapter)