Sitting black and white time

Chapter 7 Bai: Simple but happy, you can have it with open hands (3)
I only heard a sweet voice coming into my ears: "A long time ago, I thought that I could escape from society and be an isolated person, but then I found that when I grow up, my thoughts are not like this. People who want to die, or people who are always in unrequited love, everyone is trying to find love, looking for things that they rely on for survival, isn't this a very happy thing? Everyone They all have their own direction to work towards, and I always feel that this is a very remarkable thing.”

Haruki Murakami once said that the word "Xiaozhenxing" belongs to us, small, certain, and happy.

When signing, I stepped forward and said "thank you".

She smiled at me, and replied to me in not fluent Chinese: "Thank you for your liking".

People will always learn to grow, and puberty is just a moment.We ran with all our strength, waved and reveled at the finish line that symbolized the end of the sprint... At that moment of running, the moment of wiping sweat, adolescence has gone away...

However, the feeling of running, the sound of the wind, and the smell of sweat will all be engraved in our memory.

At 21 years old, I am enjoying my current state.

I enjoy seeing my favorite writer try something different, just as I enjoy trying a different life.

Whether it's the guy in the convenience store, the person standing under the scorching sun handing out flyers, or the boy in the white shirt sitting in the classroom, or me sitting in front of the computer reading the manuscript...every one of me is about to be dusted. Running on the road of time, less unruly and more calm...

I think I will always remember those small, sure, happiness that belong to us.

I think I will always remember that feeling of looking for something to live on.

I think I will always remember you as I remember myself.

she won't forget the time

Text / not summer
I would like to dedicate this article to the goddess in my mind - Sanmao.

When I first knew the name Sanmao, I was stunned for a moment, and the image of the funny and poor boy in "The Wanderings of Sanmao" immediately appeared in my mind.This is my initial understanding of the name. Looking at the long-haired woman wearing a big necklace on the cover of the book, the two or three points of strangeness I felt were repelled by that smile.

This is my first encounter with Sanmao, during this period when the rainy season does not come.

When reading a book, you always put the most famous works of a certain writer at the end, just like when eating, you must leave your favorite food at the end to savor slowly.If the best-written work is devoured at the beginning, the rest of it will seem dull.

And Sanmao, who was accidentally found on the aunt's bookshelf, seemed to have opened another window to the world.

Sanmao wrote in the preface: "The reason why I am not shy and willing to publish some of the manuscripts I published between the ages of 17 and 22 into a book is nothing more than one purpose - this book "The Rainy Season Doesn't Come Again" "The little book represents the growth process and feelings of a young girl. It may be immature in technique, confused and sad in thought, but it is indeed a past me, a very different from today's healthy and progressive Sanmao Big difference Ermao."

Kind of cute frankly.When I first came into contact with this book, I didn't quite understand the content of the book.It's a bit far-fetched for a junior high school boy who has just entered junior high school and only wants to defeat monsters to save society to experience those little thoughts in the process of growing up...

The episodes I can remember are probably the girl whose shoes were all wet when the rainy season came, and the story about how difficult mathematics was in the postscript and how difficult it was for her parents to arrange to practice calligraphy...

Young memories are always shallow and without substance.Thinking that at my age, Sanmao had already begun to write those girlish feelings into books, and I was still immersed in the old dream of defending the earth, I couldn't help but feel ashamed.

When I was in high school, I started to re-read Sanmao, one after another, tirelessly.I like the emotions contained in those simple words, and I don't like the camel meat sent by my neighbors, secretly driven far away and thrown in the desert.Accidentally broke into the cemetery in the desert and was scared to death... A man who was six years younger than her confessed and said that she was waiting for her in the desert, she was anxious like a little girl...

Every display of temperament makes people see Sanmao's innocence.

In my impression, she is someone who writes in her own little world.Regardless of the strong winds and waves outside, she will always live in her own girlish country, writing her little thoughts, little pains, and little feelings.Not all literati have to rise to the point of concern for the country and the people. It is a good thing to write my heart with my pen, and to write out those subtle touches that are forgotten by people every day...

What I envy more is her courage to leave as soon as she wants.Because of his yearning for the Sahara Desert, after going halfway around the world, he finally headed there without hesitation.She also complained in letters about the inconvenient life in the desert, the lack of water, and the neighbors who don’t like to take a bath. She always thinks her house is magical, and she sits in rows... Missing her hometown and so on... But none of these things stopped her factor.After a long absence from school, illness, and various misfortunes, she finally turned into a flower on thorns in the desert, enjoying the most perfect life-dreams are being realized, and her lover is by her side.This spirit just gave us a kind of guidance that as long as we persevere, we can realize our dreams.

In my heart, she has always been a young girl, writing her beautiful fantasy about life with a pen.Only those who have seen the dark side of life can always maintain a gentle belief in life, and she is undoubtedly the kind of person who will always persist and always smile.

And those little typefaces printed on paper accompanied me through every day of adolescence.

For love, all people will insist.

Especially those who have experienced the death of their fiancé should be very afraid that the people around them will leave again.

At that time, I suddenly understood why someone would say: "Believe me, I will not die before you, I will always be by your side..."

When a human being who has always been alone has feelings for another human being, he is absolutely unwilling to let him disappear from his life in advance.

What kind of pain did this person with braids and smiling cross-legged often experience afterwards?
I can't figure it out.

I only know that if there is nothing left to miss in this world, then I will choose the worst way to end my life!

Love is the hurdle that no one can overcome in this world.

How many years have passed, I still remember that that afternoon, I found this "The Rainy Season Will Never Come" on my aunt's bookshelf. I didn't really understand the sorrow of those girls, but I found it very cute inexplicably.

Maybe our lives are not perfect, maybe our encounters make us think about giving up again and again, but we have not escaped, but bravely face life, this is enough.

The girl in my heart, I hope you will always be able to wear braids and smile so happily.

Also worship summer with sunshine

Text / not summer
When I received the instructions from the leader about writing a series of "Positive Energy Duty Diaries", I was really worried for a long time.

As an ordinary editor, I really don't have any stories to share with you. The laughter and cursing in life, the ups and downs, are all stories that everyone needs to experience. They are different but shocking.

I have spent more than 10 years of my life smoothly. From an ordinary student to today, a magazine editor known by tens of thousands of people across the country, the journey has been smooth, very smooth, and I have not experienced too much in life. What kind of way do I need to communicate with you so that I can better integrate into you? This is something I have been worrying about for a long time...

My story is not enough to motivate you to move forward. Even, I originally studied design, and the words I wrote are too jerky, unable to give you energy at the most critical time, or make you cry loudly, and relieve your heart Depressed emotions...

But I, who is so terrible, still bite the bullet and wrote down all my feelings and words I want to pass on to you.

The reason for the story comes from the girl who sent me a private message on Weibo.She left me a message and said: "What should I do? I was temporarily assigned by the teacher to host the grade party. I am worried that I will not do well. I don't want to make a fool of myself in front of everyone, and I don't want the people I like to see me standing in the middle of the stage and forget about it." Such an embarrassing moment for lines."

It is human nature to fear the unknown.Afraid of failure in unfamiliar situations, worried that everyone's ridicule would make him feel ashamed.We've always lived so humblely, with those fears and chains.It's just that if you don't take that step, maybe you will never know that there is an option of success behind failure!
If you choose to stay in a safe zone just to avoid failure, then you will never find out that maybe you are really talented in hosting, maybe your writing is not smooth, maybe at a certain moment someone reads it. When it arrived, it just happened to heal her heart... At least for now, I cherish every opportunity to tell everyone what is in my heart and let everyone know a completely different me.

It may be safe to voluntarily give up, but may there be different gains if you take the initiative to try?
Maybe you, who have been keeping a low profile on weekdays, have never caught his attention, but because of your outstanding performance at the party, you may become the Cinderella in his mind in one fell swoop.Maybe, I have always been bad at speaking and writing, but because I really touched you at some point, maybe it became a bestseller in one fell swoop...

It is better to work hard with an active heart than to accept passively!Only by signing a positive contract with the universe can you reap unexpected things!
So lovely people, are you willing to overcome the fear of the unknown together with me, like me?
her thoughts have gone north

Text / not summer
I have a cousin who is five years older than me. When I was a child, my parents always planned to trade me for him... He is very handsome, and his grades are not ordinary.In short, at that time, he was the perfect child that all parents expected.I was jealous, hated, and envious of him at the time, and my feelings were very complicated.

When he was in the third grade of elementary school, he transferred out of the school for children of our factory and went to the best school in the city at that time.After that, I kept hearing others talk about him being the first in this exam and that competition, and I was still very envious.

During the college entrance examination, he entered the medical school with the fifth grade in the province.He came back once when he was a sophomore, played together during the summer vacation, and heard him talk about his dreams of becoming a doctor.The eyes were shining, the expression of yearning, full of anticipation, I still remember it very clearly.At that time, he was still very handsome, and he had a beautiful girlfriend who played the violin in the conservatory.He worked very hard. I remember that he got up at five o'clock every day, ran [-] meters, then went to the library to read, and went to bed before twelve o'clock in the evening.

When we heard about him again, it was people we knew that rumored in the circle that he was crazy, insane or mentally ill, in short, he dropped out of school to recuperate.When I heard the news, I cried a lot. At that time, I wrote a diary saying, it's over, such an excellent genius is ruined.

I saw him again before graduating from university. At that time, he was dark and fat, and completely lost his previous outline, which was said to be the result of hormone drugs.He can no longer be a doctor, but based on his medical background, he is now engaged in pharmaceutical sales. He came to ask me to see what he could do.

What saddened me the most back then was not his change in appearance, but his philistine aura.I wrote another diary entry, to the effect that good fortune tricks people, a genius doctor becomes a vulgar salesman.

Later, I heard that his medicine was selling well, so I saved a little money, and then started a diabetes website.That's when I really felt relieved.

His story made me understand that life is really a long-distance race, and ups and downs are inevitable.

There used to be some objects in school that I envied, envied and hated, such as the school beauties who were chased by thousands of people, the talented people who had a good command of Chinese and could fill in ancient poems, and the weird ones who read idle books every day but got first in every exam Talents, people who study how to play the Rubik's Cube by themselves and make up formulas to teach us to turn six sides. Of course, there are also artists who even professional teachers would admire.

In short, thinking about it now, most of the people who made me envy and hate at that time have disappeared.

Time is a sharp weapon, it often cuts off your advantage and makes you stand on the same starting line with everyone again.

You can see where a person's time is spent.

The story I told about my cousin was to praise him for struggling out of the trough of life. As everyone said, not to mention whether he succeeded in starting a business, but he struggled out of illness, married a wife and had children, which is already considered great. Achievement. (But because I don't know what he looks like now, I can't praise him.)
And the person I was talking about that made me envy and hate back then was the person I thought was superior and unattainable back then.But now, I feel that after my own efforts (or their lack of effort), there is not much difference between everyone.

Not long ago, by a coincidence, I met a partner from a previous company.When I joined the company back then, partner was already the end of my dream.Isn't the goal of most people's lifelong struggle to step up in the company step by step and become a partner?But after I got in touch with him that time, I felt that his thinking was very narrow and his approach was ridiculous.After returning home, I mentioned this to my friend, but my friend laughed at me: "That's because your vision is different now."

This is what I want to express in this diary.Life is a long road, halfway, you will see someone in front of you, or someone behind you.If you rest too long, the people behind will catch up; if you redouble your efforts, the people in front will also be surpassed by you.

(End of this chapter)