Low-key life, high-profile work

Chapter 8 Lower your posture and win a wider space (3)
Take a step back

Once, a warship went to sea to perform a mission.Soon there was heavy fog, and visibility at sea level was very low.The captain was worrying, and suddenly received a report from the soldiers: "Report to the captain, we found a light on the starboard side of the warship." The captain quickly asked, "Is this light fixed or moving?" "Report to the captain, it is fixed. Yes!" replied the soldier.The captain thought for a while, and told the soldiers: "If we continue sailing, we will definitely collide. Immediately send a signal to that ship, saying that we are on a dangerous collision line with them, and ask them to change the direction of the ship. Turn left or right 30 degrees!" The soldier followed suit immediately, and soon received the signal from the other party.The soldiers informed the captain of the information received: "Report to the captain, the other party asked us to change the course by 30 degrees." Upon hearing this, the captain said unhappily: "Tell the other party that I am a captain and ask him to change the course. !” The soldier did as requested.Soon I received feedback: "The captain is nothing special, I am still a second-level sailor! I ask you to change course." The captain was very angry and said to the soldiers: "You tell him that we are a warship, order him Turn around immediately!" However, the captain's order still didn't work, because this time the soldiers brought the message: "Report to the captain, the signal ahead says it is a lighthouse, order us to turn around..." But the warship had no time to turn. up.

"Endure the calm for a while, and take a step back to broaden the sea and the sky." This is a well-known truth, but when you encounter a "horn", you still can't help but get in. As a result, the road gets narrower and narrower, and things become more and more troublesome.When the narrow alley ahead is blocked, why not back out?The strange thing is that sometimes people are very twisted in their hearts, and instead of taking the big road, they prefer to survive in danger.

The octopus is a representative of molluscs. Its body is so soft that it can squeeze itself into almost any place it wants to go.Some octopuses also have developed brains, can look in the mirror, and can walk out of mazes designed by scientists.But they have a fatal flaw: they are addicted to various utensils and like to hide in utensils.People take advantage of this feature to string small bottles together and sink them into the bottom of the sea.As soon as the octopuses saw these small bottles, they scrambled to get into them.No matter how narrow the bottle is, they have to get into it desperately.As a result, these animals that roam the bottom of the sea have become "prisoners" in bottles and delicacies on the table.

People will laugh at the stupidity of the octopus, but they don't know how to reflect on themselves.There are many ways to go on the road of life, if this road does not work, change to the other road.There is obviously a dead end ahead, so why bother to go all the way to the dark?The strength of a person lies not only in his own strength, but also in whether he can balance external forces well and use external forces to arm himself.How much external force you can borrow depends on how big your mind is.

Xiang Yu was known as the "Overlord of Western Chu". He could lift a tripod weighing hundreds of catties by himself, which could be described as "powerful and unrivaled in the world".But such a brave hero was eventually defeated by the "Gaoyang drunkard" Liu Bang.In the case of Yingbo alone, we can find the reason.

Yingbo is the number one general under Xiang Yu, and he has always cooperated with Xiang Yu tacitly.In 205 B.C., King Tianrong of Qi rebelled against Chu. Xiang Yu led an army to crusade against Qi State. After killing Tian Rong, he killed countless civilians in Guanzhong.His behavior is no different from that of bandits. This is Xiang Yu's attitude towards traitors.At that time, Xiang Yu asked Yingbo to send troops to support him, but Yingbo only sent a few thousand people.

Later, when Pengcheng fought, Yingbo claimed that he was sick and did not send anyone to help Xiang Yu.From then on, Xiang Yu was very dissatisfied with Yingbo, but because there were still enemies, he did not send troops to attack Yingbo, but sent envoys to blame Yingbo many times.Seeing Xiang Yu reprimanding him many times, Yingbu was terrified, and was even more afraid to go to see him. The conflict between the two became deeper and deeper.Liu Bang took the opportunity to step in and successfully lobbied Yingbo to rebel against Xiang Yu.After Xiang Yu learned about it, instead of trying to resolve the conflict between the two, he sent troops to attack Yingbo in a rage.Yingbo completely rebelled against Chu.

In the Battle of Gaixia three years later, Yingbu was among those who besieged Xiang Yu with the Han army.

Xiang Yu has always relied heavily on Yingbo in the military. If he can be more tolerant, not overly concerned about Yingbo's non-soldiers, and less censure, Yingbo may not rebel against Chu.If you can't tolerate a subordinate who is not perfect, how can you tolerate the world?Compared with Liu Bang who chased Han Xin with Jibu and Yuexia regardless of the previous suspicions, Xiang Yu really lacked the magnanimity of a monarch.

Allow three points in everything, and the road will be wider.It's like a small bottle containing an octopus. The further you drill, the smaller the space is, and the further you go, the more space there is.Those who are magnanimous and tolerant have heaven and earth in their hearts, and they can retreat to any place, and the road will never end.In ancient Greek mythology, there was a hero named Hercules.One day, Hercules was walking on an unsteady road when he came across a sack-like thing.He felt that his foot was in the way, so he kicked it over.Unexpectedly, instead of being kicked away, the bag expanded exponentially, getting bigger and bigger.

Hercules was furious, and he picked up a wooden stick and threw it at the bag, which inflated even more, blocking the road tightly.At this time, a wise man told Hercules: "This is a bag of hatred. The more you provoke it, the more it will expand; if you ignore it, it will shrink." So Hercules stayed away from the bag.After a while, the hatred bag slowly shrank.

Tribulations in life are actually like this "hate bag", the more you want to fight it, the more unkind it will be to you; if you back down a step, it will also back down three points.

Wisdom
Appropriately take a step back, give the other party a narrow path, and give yourself a back path.Concession is not cowardice, but flexibility.

It is reasonable to give up three points

On the bus, the girl accidentally grabbed the hair of the woman in the front seat.The woman turned her head impatiently, and the girl quickly said "I'm sorry".The woman said persistently, "What are you doing? You don't have eyes!" The girl said, "I'm sorry, Auntie, I didn't do it on purpose." "So, do you still grab people's hair on purpose?" The woman made things difficult.The girl said again: "Auntie, I didn't mean that. I was careless. Calm down." The woman still didn't let her go: "This is the end? Say a few words of 'I'm sorry' and I will suffer in vain. It's too cheap. You." The girl had no choice but to say: "I'm sorry, you should grab my hair, I really didn't mean it." "What are you talking about, the dog bit me, should I bite it back..." Each There are so many ugly words in my ears.People in the car talked a lot, saying that this woman was too much.The woman also glared at everyone: "You still blame me? Am I wronged?"

There will inevitably be some small friction between people.With tolerance as the foundation, big things will turn into small things, small things will become nothing, and conflicts will not escalate; being reasonable and not forgiving is not only impersonal, but small things are complicated, reasonable will become unreasonable, and it is bound to cause interpersonal relationships deterioration.The way the woman in the story handles things is wrong, and of course it is difficult to get people's approval.Her embarrassment is self-inflicted, and the ending of being unreasonable and unforgiving must be to harm others and herself.

Be lenient to others, give up three points even if it is reasonable, and all problems will no longer be problems.

A customer called the waiter over with a gloomy face and said, "Look! This is inferior milk. It's spoiled like this and you're serving it to customers. It ruined my cup of good black tea!" The waiter even apologized. Smilingly, he said to the customer: "I'll give you a new cup right away." After finishing speaking, he brought an identical cup of black tea with fresh lemon and milk still in the saucer.Gently put it in front of the customer, and the waiter whispered: "May I have a suggestion? Next time you drink black tea, if you put lemon, don't put milk, because citric acid will make the milk agglomerate." The customer blushed with shame, drank his tea in a hurry and left.Someone asked the waiter, "She's so rude, why don't you just say it? She is so rude to you, you should give her some color." The waiter smiled slightly and said, "Because of her impoliteness, I am even more rude. Be tactful. Convincing people with disrespect is worse than convincing them with reason and compassion." The words made all the customers nod repeatedly.

The best way to persuade people in the world is not to overwhelm people with power, not to scare people with loud voices, let alone bullying people with force, but to convince people with a heart.

The Battle of Guandu had just ended, and Cao Jun counted the results.At this time, an official came to Cao Cao with a bundle of documents and said, "Report, my lord, Yuan Shao ran away in a hurry and left behind a lot of documents. Among them are a batch of letters, and the letters are addressed to Xu Du and some people in Cao Ying." .” Cao Cao opened the letter and saw that most of the content was flattering Yuan Shao, and some expressed that he would betray Cao and return to Yuan.When the general next to him saw it, his nose was twisted with anger: "My lord should arrest and punish this group of eaters." Cao Cao smiled slightly and said, "Burn all these letters!" Everyone was stunned, and someone asked: "My lord, are you right? These are all enemies of our army, so we need to investigate carefully!" Cao Cao said: "I don't want to investigate, it's nothing like this."

Cao Cao seemed to be confused, but in fact, he gave those who secretly informed Yuan Shao a reassurance.Cao Cao's tolerance made them tearful, and they have served him wholeheartedly ever since.In fact, it is reasonable for Cao Cao to punish those people, but in this way, he will lose a group of followers.This is what people who achieve great things do. They don't hold their braids in their hands and don't hold them accountable, so that those who make mistakes feel embarrassed and surrender willingly.It can be seen that it is a kind of wisdom to make three points even if it is reasonable.It is like a powerful adsorption force, uniting more people by its side.

After Cyrus, the founder of the Persian Empire defeated the Medes Kingdom, he did not take revenge on the Medes King who had wanted to kill him, but let him enjoy the treatment that a king should have.Later Cyrus conquered Babylon.When the Persian army entered the city of Babylon, Cyrus conveyed his order to soldiers at all levels: Do not disturb the people, do not interfere with the religious beliefs of the local people, and respect the customs and habits of the local people.

In every invasion in history, the invaders burned, killed and looted the people in the conquered areas.The history of the invaders is often the history of the blood and tears of the people of the conquered area, and Cyrus broke this convention for the first time.Not only that, he also freed the foreign slaves who were imprisoned in Babylon, sent special personnel to send these people to their hometowns, and invested manpower and material resources to help them build their own civilization.

Hundreds of years later, the Persian Empire was destroyed by Alexander.Not only did the equally excellent emperor not destroy the tomb of Cyrus when he passed by, he also ordered his tomb to be repaired as a show of worship. Today, more than 2000 years later, the tomb of Cyrus is still standing, and the inscriptions on the pillars next to the tomb are still clearly visible.

Wisdom
It is actually a kind of wisdom to be reasonable and allow three points, but all the great figures who have achieved great achievements in history must have extraordinary heroism.This kind of spirit allows them to gather all their strength, strengthen themselves, be successful in life and in the world.

Endure small things and seek big things, retreat is advance

After Liu Bang won the world, he first awarded rewards for his achievements.He first conferred more than a dozen meritorious officials, but later, many generals argued endlessly for their own merits, so that Liu Bang didn't know who should be conferred-they would cause trouble if the distribution of conferments was uneven.Liu Bang was so devastated that he finally gave up the seal altogether.

One day, Liu Bang was walking in the palace, and saw a group of old subordinates gathered together and whispering in a mysterious way.He became suspicious and wanted to ask for clarification, but was stopped by Zhang Liang.Zhang Liang said: "Does Your Majesty know what they are discussing?" Liu Bang shook his head and said he didn't know.Zhang Liang said: "Your Majesty, how can you not guess? They are discussing rebellion!" Liu Bang was taken aback, and said, "Why are they rebelling? The world has just been pacified, don't they want to live in peace?" Zhang Liang said: " Your Majesty, you were born as a commoner, and you gained the world thanks to these subordinates. Now that you are an emperor, you should be rewarded for your merits, but they are not rewarded now, so they naturally have resentment." Liu Bang said helplessly: "It's not that I don't want to reward them It’s just that so many people are rewarded according to their merits, I’m afraid it’s not enough to divide the world. What do you want me to do?” Zhang Liang said: “They also know this truth, so they are afraid that you will hold them accountable because you don’t have land to reward them The mistakes of the past. Now they gather together to discuss a solution, and of course the best solution is to rebel and re-divide the world." Liu Bang was so surprised that his back was sweating, he said: "Then what should I do?" Zhang Liang said: "Your Majesty Who do you hate the most?" Liu Bang said: "I hate Yong Chi the most. This guy has betrayed me many times, if it wasn't for his meritorious service, I would have killed him long ago." Zhang Liang said: "Then your Majesty, hurry up Make Yongchi a Marquis! Seeing that Yongchi is sealed, those generals will naturally settle down." Liu Bang immediately set up a banquet with wine, invited Yongchi into the court hall, and sealed Yongchi in front of all the generals.

Finally, those generals who did not get the reward gradually calmed down when they saw that Yong Chi was sealed.They all thought: If Yong Chi is conferred the title of marquis, we will definitely get the title.

Liu Bang hated Yong Chi the most, but this crisis was resolved by rewarding Yong Chi.This incident may seem ironic, but it actually implies philosophy.To test a person's mind, you can see his attitude towards the enemy.If the enemy can tolerate it, what else can others not tolerate?Liu Bang only needs to tolerate Yong Chi alone, and he will be supported by all his officials. Why not do it when he tolerates small things and seeks big things?
To be broad-minded, to be able to achieve more with less, is to win in breadth.If you can stretch and bend, you can win in depth.

Before Han Xin became famous, he was talented but useless.On this day, he met a few hooligans on the street.They blocked Han Xin's way, some squinted at Han Xin, some crossed their legs, and looked arrogant.Han Xin saw a few people with malicious intentions, and asked with a haha: "My dear friends, what's the matter?" One of them smiled and said, "My dear brother? You are so kind! We have something to ask you, let's see if you dare! ”韩信依然打着哈哈：“不知仁兄有何事？蒙各位抬爱看得起我韩某人。”一个地痞笑了起来：“我们不抬你，要揍你！”其他人也哈哈笑起来。Although Han Xin was startled, he remained calm on the surface, and asked, "I don't know how Xiao Ke offended everyone. You and I have no grievances, why did you beat Xiao Ke? I really don't understand it." A local ruffian said with a strange smile. : "We heard that you are very courageous. Today, my brothers want to see and see how courageous you, Han Xin, are. Are you bolder than us?"

These people were obviously making trouble out of nothing and deliberately embarrassing themselves. Han Xinxin was very angry, but "a good man doesn't suffer from immediate losses." He suppressed his anger and said with a smile: "Brothers, who told you this? What courage do I, Han Xin, have?" How dare you compare yourself with those heroes? Rumors! Rumors!" Several people still refused to let him go. The leader of the group pulled out his sword and threw it in front of Han Xin, saying: "Be honest, we don't care about you today. Take your sword and chop off my head if you dare, or slip through my crotch."

At this time, there was already a group of people around them.Han Xin gritted his teeth, squatted down slowly, and crawled under the man's crotch.The crowd laughed endlessly, and the group laughed too, but Han Xin walked away amidst the ridicule of the crowd.

Forbearance is a passive process.Forbearance can certainly lead to great things, if you can turn passive into active, and turn dislike into appreciation, this is another higher level of self-improvement.

The two bosses are exchanging management experience.As soon as Boss A mentioned things in his company, he became depressed.He said: "It's like this. Although my company looks good, there are a few employees who are not good enough. One employee is always picky and always picks faults; another employee is worried all day long, worrying about the company; An employee has the bad habit of fishing in troubled waters, and hangs out all day long. I’m so troubled because of these three people, I don’t know what to do.” Boss B thought for a while and said, “Man, why don’t you take these three people together? I personally recommend you to work in my company. What do you think?" Boss A was very happy, and things were handled accordingly.

Later, the employee who was always picky was assigned to manage product quality issues, the employee who was always worried was assigned to manage the company's security work, and the employee who liked to fish in troubled waters was assigned to promote the company's products.After this arrangement, Boss B's business is getting better and better, and the three employees are also doing very happily.

Wisdom
Forbearance is not cowardice, and retreat is not timidity.What seems like a helpless move actually hides a way out.It should be known that to bear the small is to seek the big, and to retreat is to advance.

(End of this chapter)