Scene language skills that college students must know

Chapter 26 Scene 26 - When Complimenting Others

Chapter 26 Scene 26 - When Complimenting Others
Chapter 26 Scene 26 - When Complimenting Others
Praise, like the spring breeze blowing on the face, gives people a very comfortable feeling. ?
Praise, like the air, is everywhere and is needed everywhere.The world needs praise, human beings need praise. ?
Praise can make people communicate with each other and enhance their relationship.When people praise each other, each other's feelings will be communicated accordingly, and each other will be happy.

more tacit understanding.Praise can also make people understand each other and enhance unity.Because each other sees each other's strengths and strengths, more
conducive to mutual learning.Praise can also make people encourage each other and increase confidence.Because people live in society, praise is

It is a kind of feedback information that is "beneficial to society".With such feedback, people will feel that their survival is worthwhile.

Therefore, they will cherish their own life more and have more confidence to continue to survive.Praise can also encourage people to connect with each other

Accept and promote exchanges. ?
Although everyone loves to praise, not everyone is good at it.Some people lose their sense of proportion, and praise turns into praise;
If it is too straightforward, the praise becomes abrupt; someone is empty in content, making people doubt his sincerity; someone does not pay attention to balance, and praises
I unfortunately offended B during the manicure... All these are the consequences of not being good at compliments.The following is a reason

An example of two very different situations caused by praise.It is said that there are two hunters, A and B, who each hunted two hares and went home.Armored

When the wife saw it, she said coldly: "Did you only catch two?" Hunter A was displeased: "Do you think it's easy to catch?"

The next day he deliberately went home empty-handed to let his wife know that hunting is not easy.The situation encountered by Hunter B is just the opposite.he
When his wife saw that he had brought back two hares, she said happily, "You have caught two!"

"What's two?" He was so proud that he got four back the next day.Stupidity of the former, cleverness of the latter, no

obvious? ?

American psychologist William?James said: "One of the deepest endeavors of human nature is the desire to be admired, admired, respected.

"It can be seen that being praised is what everyone desires in his heart. Praising others can make people work hard and push a person to the light.

A bright journey is the driving force for progress.Praise is to the heart, just like the sun is to life, it has a very magical effect.at me

Appropriately praising others in our lives will have unexpected effects.So, how to properly compliment others

Woolen cloth?Several typical methods and techniques are provided below. ?
([-]) See the truth in the subtleties?
Many people are used to talking in general terms when they praise others, and they can't grasp the key points of praise. One of the outstanding manifestations is that they over-neglect

detail.In fact, the reason why the other party has invested so much time and effort in the details is that on the one hand, it shows that the other party has special considerations for this.
Preference, on the other hand, also shows that the other party desires this part of the effort to get the reward and affirmation it deserves.Therefore, we are submitting
In real life, we should be good at discovering subtle intentions, and repay the other party's good intentions with praise and thanks, which will not only bring great benefits to the other party.
Great psychological satisfaction, and will deepen mutual spiritual understanding.Please see the example below. ?
When French President de Gaulle visited the United States, at a banquet held by Nixon for him, Mrs. Nixon spent a lot of money

Da Jin has arranged a beautiful flower display stand: in the center of a horseshoe-shaped table, bright and dazzling tropical flowers set off the
A fine fountain.The shrewd General de Gaulle saw at a glance that this was carefully designed and made by the hostess to welcome him.

Can't help but praise: "The hostess must have spent a lot of time on such a beautiful and elegant banquet to hold a formal banquet."
Plan and furnish! Mrs. Nixon was very happy when she heard that. Afterwards, she said: "Most of the visiting dignitaries either don't

Pay attention, or bother to thank the hostess for it, and he always thinks and talks about others. "It can be seen that a simple compliment
What a repercussion the words of others will bring. ?
De Gaulle is a head of state, but he still has a fine understanding of the intentions of others, which makes him a person who is especially respected.face

Mrs. Nixon's carefully arranged flower stand, de Gaulle did not turn a blind eye or ignore it like other big figures, but
Immediately understood the painstaking efforts the other party had spent here, and expressed special affirmation and gratitude for this painstaking effort.de gaulle praise
Although the speech was brief, it was clear that Mrs. Nixon was deeply moved. ?
([-]) Praise through the mouth of a third party?

Praising a person under the guise of another person's mouth not only conveys the goodwill of the third party, but also expresses one's own position of approval. ?
During Xiaowei's postgraduate study, there was a younger sister named Xiaoju. When she first entered school, she was disliked because she came from an ordinary teacher's college.

Lack of self-confidence, somewhat inferior compared with classmates from prestigious universities.After Xiao Wei found out about this situation, he talked to her,

Said to her: "Our tutor told me that your homework is very serious, your thinking is deep, and you are a good seedling. The tutor is exactly

This is why I listed you as my subordinate. "She was very happy after hearing this, and felt that she was still an outstanding figure in the mind of the instructor.
promising girl.From then on, Xiaoju redoubled her efforts in studying and published more than ten papers in three years.remember now

, Xiaowei's mentor's praise at that time must have played a great role in motivating her during her growth.Convey third party praise

Beauty, one is to be true, not to make up random things, and the other is to express one's approval, if one opposes others' praise, then

, you may not be popular.In life, we often hear "So-and-so admires you very much", "So-and-so praises you..." and so on.
This is the case. ?
In daily life, if you can use the words of influential people, especially authority figures, to praise others, it will play a more significant role.

Effect.This kind of praise can make the other party have another comfort besides psychological satisfaction.The following is such an example

. ?
In 1997, Jin Yong had a dialogue with Japanese cultural celebrity Daisaku Ikeda, and the content of the dialogue was later compiled into a book and published.in the right

At the beginning of the talk, Jin Yong expressed a modest attitude and said: "Although I have talked with the chairman (referring to Ikeda) in the past

Celebrities are not on the same level, but I am happy to do my best to speak to the President. After hearing this, Daisaku Ikeda hurriedly said: "You are too

that's humble.Your modesty makes me deeply feel the "adult style" of Mr. Wang.In your 72 years of life, this 'adult style'

It is consistent, and every step of yours is worthy of our memory and memory. "Ikeda asked Jin Yong to drink tea, and then took the
The author said: "As everyone said, 'Where there are Chinese people, there must be Jin Yong's works', Mr. enjoys such a high reputation, which shows that you deserve it.
He is worthy of being a master of Chinese literature and a literary giant at the pinnacle of Asia.And you are the 'prosperous and peaceful' Hong Kong of the world
The standard-bearer in the public opinion circle is a veritable 'pen warrior'. "Spring and Autumn·Zuo Zhuan" has a saying: "The Supreme Being has morality, followed by

There is meritorious service, followed by making words, which are called the three immortals.In my opinion, only the value of the many spirits that you have built, sir

Is truly belong to the 'immortal'. "?
Daisaku Ikeda praises Jin Yong here, and the words he quoted, no matter where there are Chinese people, there must be works by Jin Yong

, or the "Warrior of the Pen" and "The Supreme Being Lide...so called the Three Immortals" in "Spring and Autumn Zuo Zhuan" are all public opinion.
It is obviously not only fair, but also just right to praise Jin Yong by using the speeches in the commentary circles or classics.

The other party is satisfied. ?
([-]) Discover the bright spots?
Everyone has flaws and a tendency to "downplay their flaws."But when you can spot the bright spots in the flaws of others
This is the best compliment for others. ?
Kath?Dali wants to be a singer, but her face is not pretty.Her mouth is very big, her teeth are also very sharp, every time
The first time she sang in public, she kept trying to pull her upper lip down over her teeth.She wanted not to show her nasty teeth.

The results of it?She makes a fool of herself and dooms herself to failure. ?
However, among those who listened to the girl's singing, one person thought she was very talented.He said bluntly: "I have been

Watching your show, I know what you are trying to hide, you think your teeth are ugly. "This girl is very difficult

For love, but the man continued: "Don't try to cover up, open your mouth, if you don't care about your teeth
If you do, the audience will love you.Besides, those teeth you want to cover up may be your precious ones! "?
Kath?Dali accepted his advice and did not try to hide her teeth again.From then on, she thought only of her audience,

Opening her mouth wide and singing with gusto and glee, she eventually became a movie and radio superstar. ?
Just as the sun has sunspots, its flaws do not conceal its advantages, and its shortcomings sometimes do not affect its own advantages.suit its shortcomings
Let the other party accept it and face it, which will make him more confident and more radiant.Weaknesses don't go away, no matter
Whether you admit it or not, it exists.Well, if you accept it bravely and analyze it comprehensively, you can lighten it from your heart.

Melt away. ?
([-]) Combining praise and encouragement?

Express praise in a subtle tone, let the other party understand the meaning of affirmation, encouragement and expectation, and encourage the other party to make progress
.Feng Zikai's career in art is an example of this. ?
After Feng Zikai was admitted to the First Zhejiang Normal University, Li Shutong taught him drawing.When teaching charcoal model sketching, Li Shutong first showed everyone how to draw
When finished, the picture was pasted on the blackboard, and most of the students copied it according to the picture on the blackboard, only Feng Zikai and a few colleagues
Learn to sketch directly from plaster according to Li Shutong's practice.Li Shutong noticed Feng Zikai's enlightenment.Once, Li Shutong and

He said to Feng Zikai in an angry tone: "Your drawing progress is very fast. I teach in Nanjing and Hangzhou, and I have never seen a painting like yours.
Students who make rapid progress.From now on, you can..." Li Shutong didn't continue, and observed Feng Zikai's reaction

.At this time, Feng Zikai was not only rejoiced by the teacher's praise, but also realized that there was something hidden in the teacher's unspoken words.
Great hopes for his future.So Feng Zikai said: "Thank you! Thank you sir! I will definitely live up to your expectations!"
One night, Li Shutong's praise to Feng Zikai inspired him to embark on an artistic career.Feng Zikai later said: "Mr. Li's

A few words, determined my life... This night is an important juncture in my life, because from this night, I am determined to
My idea is to study painting exclusively and dedicate my life to art.It hasn't changed in decades. "?
Here, although Li Shutong noticed Feng Zikai's talent in painting and was quite excited about it, he

When praising Feng Zikai, he still tried his best to maintain a peaceful mind and tone, and only expressed his respect for Feng Zikai's paintings with simple and implicit sentences.
The affirmation of the progress of art, while hesitating to speak, let him understand the strong feeling of expectation.Such praise, both
It made Feng Zikai feel satisfied and also gave him great encouragement. ?
([-]) Praise others with analogy and humor?
Complimenting others with analogy and humor is to compare two or more things that are not related to each other and have no history or conventions.
The related things are put together and compared, it seems neither fish nor fowl, but also contains the meaning of praise. ?
It is said that Napoleon was watching an opera in the opera house, and when he saw the famous composer Rossini sitting in another box, he asked his attendants to invite him
come over.Rossini hurried to Napoleon's box, knelt down and apologized: "Your Majesty, I didn't wear evening dress to see you,

Please pardon my disrespect. "Napoleon said amazingly: "My friend, between the emperor and the emperor, etiquette does not exist!" "

Napoleon also referred to Rossini as the "emperor" and said "there is no etiquette between emperors and emperors".This sentence is quiet
The language of silence is a high appreciation for Rossini, so that he has the honorary title of "Emperor of Music". ?
Analogy humor, because the greater the difference between the two analogies, the stronger the incoordination, and the more intriguing humorous artistic conception can be formed.exist
in this way
In a humorous conversation atmosphere, praise will be like a cute baby, no one will be overwhelmed by praise, but a special

don't be happy. ?
([-]) Infer that the effect of praise is good?
Borrowing speculation to praise others, although this method has a certain degree of subjective will, may not be true, but it can be obtained from well-intentioned people.

Inferring other people's good things in imagination can give people a good feeling. ?
There is a kind little girl who always thinks she is ugly and keeps her head down like a mimosa, even at Christmas

.So, on Christmas Day, because he walked with his head down, he knocked down an old man, a white-haired blind man. ?
The little girl was taken aback, and quickly said "I'm sorry", her voice was quite small, and she was full of deep self-blame.At
Yes, the blind man said: "It doesn't matter."?
The girl was very moved, and quickly helped the old man up: "Grandpa, I knocked you down, I... I will take you by the arm and send you back

home, ok? "The girl's voice is very sweet, thin, like a gentle wind.?
But the blind man shook his head: "No, child. You are very kind when you hear your voice. You must be very beautiful..." That "beauty"

The words were so bright that the girl's heart skipped a beat when she heard it. ?
"But I..." The little girl didn't know what to say for a while. ?
"Go, child." The old man noticed that the little girl was still standing in front of him, and he urged again sincerely. ?
The little girl was very moved, and nodded deeply. She already believed that the other party could see the deep apology written on her face. ?
The old man turned around, knocked his cane on the ground, and left. ?
A line of hot tears flowed from the little girl's eyes.She was grateful to the grandfather-like old man for praising her "beautiful!

"?
She looked at the old man—just standing there, standing, tearfully looking in the direction the old man had gone.It's been a long time, little girl

Only then did the dreamy feeling return to reality. ?
That is to say, from this day on, she also raises her head when she walks, because she has firmly believed that beauty is like the sun, and it also surrounds her! ?

look!This is the miracle created by one sentence!It made a disappointed little girl find the sun and confidence! ?

([-]) Use restraint to promote?

In some occasions, belittling oneself can have the effect of elevating others, which is a kind of effect of "repressing oneself to exalt".in delivery

If you lower one's talent or advantage in a certain aspect in reality, you don't need to praise more, and you have already elevated the other party invisibly.

, one's mediocrity or even inferiority just highlights the other party's brilliance or advantage in this respect.Appropriately used in this way,

It can not only successfully praise others, but also leave a good impression of humility.Zhang Tingyu used this method when praising Emperor Qianlong.
way. ?
Emperor Qianlong was a playful person by nature. He liked to drink tea, discuss poems, and write inscriptions while dealing with political affairs.One day, Prime Minister Zhang

Tingyu returned home exhausted and just wanted to rest when Qianlong came to visit suddenly. Zhang Tingyu felt a great honor and praised Qianlong for saying

"I have been in the hands of the late emperor for 13 years, and there has never been such a case. How can the emperor come to see my ministers! It's really frustrating for the old minister!"

Zhang Tingyu knew that Qianlong was good at tea, so he ordered to dig out the old snow water at home and make tea for Qianlong to taste.Qianlong is very happy to greet

The people who followed came and sat down: "We are all guests today, so don't be bound by the etiquette of the emperor and ministers. Isn't it a pleasure to sit and talk about Taoism and drink tea?" Water
After opening, Qianlong personally made tea for everyone, and also explained the tea scriptures. After hearing this, Zhang Tingyu admired it sincerely: "How do I know how to drink tea?"
These people only know that drinking tea can quench their thirst and refresh themselves.The same water and tea, I have never smelled such a fragrance. "Li Wei also took the opportunity to say

Zan said: "The origin of the emperor's sacred learning is really jaw-dropping, and there is so much knowledge after taking a sip of tea?!" Qianlong was confused after hearing this.

In full bloom, talk a lot, starting from "tea is a gentleman in water, wine is a villain in water" to discuss "the way of leniency" is really witty

Beads, eloquence, all the ministers listened attentively.As soon as Qianlong's speech was over, Zhang Tingyu praised: "I have been working in the study room for decades.
The two times Ding You was in love, as long as he was not sick, he would be with the ancestors and emperors day and night.Look at your heart at midnight, speak with conscience, selfishness
There is often the idea that the ancestors are wide and the emperor is strict, and the emperor and the courtiers are the same.I am only a courtier, and I will do my duty faithfully.To Majesty

He did his best to do the best he could according to his will, thinking that he was a virtuous prime minister.Today's emperor's grand remarks come from the way of Confucius and Mencius's benevolence and forgiveness.

For example, when talking about the political program of the Three Dynasties, although there are only three words "towards the mean", it is deafening and eye-opening.The emperor's sage, really
It's reached its peak. "Others also echoed, Qianlong was greatly satisfied.?
Zhang Tingyu belittled himself appropriately when he praised Emperor Qianlong, and he made a fuss about Qianlong's words and deeds while drinking tea, pretending to be himself
Knowing nothing about the tea ceremony, although this is a bit rustic, it made Qianlong very happy, and his flattery to Qianlong was also on point.

(End of this chapter)

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