Scene language skills that college students must know

Chapter 11 Scene Eleven - When Asking for Help
Chapter 11 Scene Eleven - When Asking for Help
In the process of daily communication, it is commonplace to ask others for help and make demands on others.But the actual situation is
For the same thing of asking for help, some people open their mouths and can often quickly get the other party's willing consent;
Grandpa sued grandma, even if they tried their best, they might not be able to do it satisfactorily.The distinction among them, in addition to the good or bad popularity,
A large part of it is whether you can speak when asking for help.Kind words and soft words make people happy, and others are willing to accept them;
Even sarcasm and harsh words are offensive, so naturally they will not obey your wishes. Such a thing was written in "Shuo Yue Quan Zhuan", Niu Gao

Yue Fei went to the small school grounds, and because he didn't know the way, he asked an old man for directions. First, Niu Gao met the old man, who was riding high on horseback.
He yelled: "Hey, old man, I ask you, where is the small school going?"
Niu Gao, keep silent.Later, Yue Fei also met this old man. He got off his horse first, stepped forward and put his hands together and said, "Don't dare to ask me."

Old man, just now, have you ever seen a big black man on a black horse, which road is he going?Hope to beg for instructions. "After listening to the old man
, very happily guided Yue Fei in the direction.The reason why Yue Fei succeeded in asking for directions was because he could speak and pay attention to manners. ?
In real life, when we ask for help from others, the first point is to be polite. For example, in the above example, when asking
When you talk, if you say "Hello", it seems that others answer your questions and solve your difficulties.

If you don’t run into a wall, then it’s no wonder that you don’t run into a wall! Secondly, you should pay attention to speaking skills and master the speaking method of asking others for help.

Ways and techniques will be of great benefit to us in resolving the troubles of daily life.Here are some tips for asking people to help you successfully: ?

([-]) Impress the other party with true feelings?
When we ask for something, if others use general reasons to prevaricate and refuse, we often find that the other party has not gone through in-depth consideration.
After careful consideration, the decision to refuse was made only for some small reasons.If we can help the other party analyze the current situation, use
The true love touches the heartstrings of the other party, and the other party will generally help. ?
In the early 80s, the project of diverting the Luan River into Tianjin was intensified.The troops responsible for the tunnel construction task were unable to supply explosives, and faced

Temporary stoppages and delays.The leader of the army was so anxious that he sent company commander Li to take a car to a chemical factory in the northeast to ask for help.Li Lianchang day and night

Cheng Qianyu rushed to the supply and marketing department of the factory, but the answer he got was only one sentence: "There is no stock now!" He asked the factory manager, who was very happy

I was busy and didn't have time to listen to his explanations, so he followed up and said a few words when he had the opportunity, but the factory manager was unmoved and said coldly:

"It's out of stock right now, and there's nothing I can do." The factory manager poured him a cup of tea and persuaded him to find another way.Li Lianchang did not give up, he drank

He took a sip of tea and said, "This water is so sweet!

People in Tianjin are bitter. What they drink is the bitter water collected from the Haihe channel and various depressions. "He caught a glimpse of the factory

He wears a watch made in Tianjin for a long time, so he continued: "You also wear a Tianjin watch! I heard that there is 10 out of every 1 watches in the country.

In Tianjin, 10 out of every 1 tractors is from Tianjin, and 4 out of every 1 people use Tianjin alkali.are you doing
industry
的行家，最懂得水与工业的关系。造1辆自行车要用1吨水，造1吨碱要160吨水，造1吨纸要2
00 tons of water... Diverting the river into Tianjin is a solution to the urgent need!Without explosives, the project will have to be postponed..." Hearing this, the factory manager felt overwhelmed.
When touched, he asked: "Are you from Tianjin?" "No, I am from Henan. Maybe I won't be able to drink the Luanhe water when the water is connected!"
Chang was completely overwhelmed.He grabbed the phone and gave an order: "The whole factory will work overtime for 3 days!" Three days later, Company Commander Li returned with a truckload of explosives.

It's over. ?
The reason why Company Commander Li was able to persuade the director of the chemical plant to obtain explosives for the Luan River into Tianjin project was that he seized the opportunity to set the topic skillfully,

The "bitter water" of Tianjin people is described by comparison, and the contribution of Tianjin people and the important role of water in industrial production are explained by examples

, and finally introduced the topic with full of affection: "Diverting Luan into Tianjin, solve the urgent need!" He also specifically expressed "No explosives, work

"Progress will have to be postponed" with burning passion, making the other party realize the role of his help. At the same time, impress the other party with true feelings, "

Maybe when the water is flowing, you still can't drink the water from the Luan River. "This kind of professionalism that takes the world as its own responsibility and the persistent emotion that solves the people's problems
A great incentive effect was produced, and the factory manager decided that the whole factory would rather work overtime and less rest to produce the explosives urgently needed by the project.
Without the medicine, Company Commander Li will be able to return home with a full load.

([-]) Arouse the interest of the other party?
Start conversations on topics that the other party is interested in or proud of, and make your own requests on the basis of satisfying the other party's psychological needs
. ?
The director of a small village-run factory wanted to establish a cooperative relationship with a large group company, but was rejected by the company's deputy manager.No.
The next day, he came to the door again and wanted to meet the general manager directly. He was told that the conversation should not exceed 5 minutes. ?
When he was introduced to the general manager, he found that the general manager was carefully dusting off a calligraphy scroll.he looked carefully

It is seal script, so he said: "General Manager, it seems that you must have studied calligraphy very well. Well, how well this seal script is written, look at the
The pen used in the method of acupuncture and dew has a variety of beauty..." When the general manager heard this, he felt that this person's conversation was extraordinary, and he must

He is a calligraphy colleague, so he said: "Please sit down, please sit down and talk."?
They talked about their experiences from calligraphy. The general manager also talked about his own struggle history.
Ask questions so that the general manager can expand the narrative to the greatest extent possible. ?
A discriminated director of a small village-run factory, who had never met the general manager of a large group, was able to persuade the other party to establish a partnership with him.
This is almost entirely attributable to the manager's sense of propriety.When talking with the general manager, the factory director did not directly mention

Instead of making a request, start with the topic "calligraphy" that the other party is interested in, and give praise in due course to satisfy the general manager to the greatest extent.
The heart of honor and the psychology of self-worth affirmation.After some speculative conversations, the two quickly became friends, and the relationship between friends
Naturally, it will be easy to communicate. ?
([-]) Compliment each other moderately?

When asking for help from others, it is best to praise the other party first to stimulate the other party's sense of honor.so that you can get the answer you want

complex. ?
For example, if someone asks others to write a manuscript, no matter what reason the other party refuses, he has a unique set of words.If the other party

Answer: "I am too busy to write for you." He will reply: "It is because you are so busy that I am looking for you.
Yes. "It may not be easy to understand at first glance, but he actually said: "You are so busy at work, which proves that you have

High talent and ability.It is precisely because of this that I ask you to write a manuscript. "In this way, the other party will be elated and happy when they hear it."

When he got serious, he would answer straightforwardly: "Okay!" In this way, he agreed to his request. ?
The key to this person's success is that he strengthened the other party's sense of honor and lifted the other party's spirit.
Then it's easy to handle. ?
([-]) Reach a consensus before requesting?

Emphasize the importance and urgency of a certain problem, reach a consensus with the other party, and then take advantage of the situation to make a request to solve this problem, so that the other party

Fang is not easy to refuse. ?
Once, a certain elementary school planned to hold a parent meeting in response to the serious loss of students.The chairperson of the meeting wants to ask the secretary of the town committee to come out
The face is strong and the voice is strong.The principal found the secretary and said: "Secretary ×, I will report the school work to you now... Among them, our school

One of the most prominent problems is the serious loss of students, which will inevitably have a negative impact on the completion of nine-year compulsory education. "Book
Ji went on to say: "Yes, this problem cannot be ignored, and we should pay attention to it." The principal took advantage of the situation and said: "So, we
The school plans to hold a parent-teacher meeting immediately, and I would like to ask you to give instructions at the meeting. "?
The secretary thought for a moment, then agreed.Later, according to him, he had already made an appointment, but it was not easy to refute, so he had no choice but to give up.
Please. ?
Here, the primary school principal successfully used the help-seeking technique of "reach consensus first and ask later".Since the secretary himself has recognized

"The problem of serious student loss should be dealt with very well", then the primary school held a parent meeting on this issue, and the secretary had

Why not attend and "give instruction"?The principal of the primary school grasped this psychology of the secretary and pushed the boat along the way, making him
Although there was another agreement, it was still difficult to refuse, so I had to agree to this extraneous request.

([-]) Impress each other with old friendship

Everyone may alienate some old friends and meet new ones due to the passage of time.Sometimes, an accident happens

The urgent matter can only be resolved by an old friend who has become indifferent, so the only way to bite the bullet is to come to the door for help.Never turn on when asking for help
Straight to the point, but first warm up the old feelings, sincerely recall the past of living together, so that old friends can immerse themselves in the fun of recalling the past

, If you strike while the iron is hot and ask him for help, most likely he will not refuse.For example, Xiao Wang's father-in-law is critically ill, and

I received a telegram at night, and I had to drive 400 miles overnight.At that time, it could only be sent by special car.His wife Xiao Chen had no choice but to ask her primary school classmates

learn (classmate's

husband is driving).As soon as Xiao Chen arrived at her classmate's house, he took her by the hand and started talking about old relationships. After 20 minutes, when the time was right, Xiao Chen explained

The reason, asking for help, really succeeded.The most important reason why Xiao Chen succeeded in asking for help was to impress the other party with his old friendship.

This trick is usually very effective. ?
The above five ways of asking for help are just the most common ones and should be dealt with according to different situations.Besides, in the
People also have taboos when asking for help. If you violate these taboos, not only will you not get help, but it will make others think of you.

Here are the three taboos for asking for help: ?
1?Avoid flattery before asking for help.Pile inappropriate compliments on others as much as you want, overwhelming them, or flattering them

The other party has goose bumps all over his body, or compliments the other party to shame.This will give people the impression of hypocrisy and smoothness, and asking for help is not enough.

Look down on you. ?
2?Avoid showing off yourself when asking for help.In order to get help from others, brag about your ambitions - what you have done

What great results will the love have, what great impact will it have... If you ask for help too much, it will only increase

It is very difficult to ask for help, and the other party will think that you have come to "burn Cao Ying with the help of the east wind, and Zhou Yu will be named Liu Bei for profit". ?
3?Avoid continuing to pester after being rejected for help.When you are rejected for help, don't plead on the ground, complain with tears, or threaten death,
Or cursing parents and scolding mothers... Isn't it humane and righteous?Hurry up and cast another door and find another way - this god does not work, it has its own effect

God.

(End of this chapter)