all the mornings

Chapter 43 The Night Comes (2)
Yu Jin said: "My mother and I are so similar in fate. Her lover betrayed her, and my lover hurt me. But my fate is a little harder than hers. In the car accident, only one rib was broken."

Later, a phone call came in and the phone rang. The ringtone was exactly the song Le Congqian composed for her, "The Girl on Clifton Bridge". When they were in love, she used it as the ringtone.

Yu Jin said, "Give it to me."

An Zu handed her the phone, she held it in her hand, and smashed it against the wall with all her strength.The phone snapped into several pieces, and the music stopped.

"You guys, don't let me have a good life."

"You have me, and I will be with you."

"One day, you will leave me too."

"The day you get married is the day I leave."

"No, the day you get married is the day you leave me."

"I don't think I'm going to get married."

"Anzu, you are a good person, you will be happy."

Li Sichuan half leaned on the sofa and bench on the balcony of the villa, Xiaoyu lay in front of him.Holding a glass of red wine in his hand, he listened to Xiaoyu finish telling the story.

The ocean was dark at night, and the sound of waves could be heard in the distance.The new moon is like a curved hook, and there are only a few sparse stars in the sky.Such a night is suitable for reminiscing about the past.

Li Sichuan recalled how he felt a little jealous when he heard the name "Le Congqian" from Le Congrang; later, he was a little ashamed when he learned about his past from Jin Yan.He thought that Le Congqian was a good-natured young man - he was born in a wealthy family, was proud of his youth, knew how to compose music in concerts, and generously formed a band.He went to the UK to study in university without worrying about food and clothing, unlike when he was a standard hard-working student.What annoyed him the most was that he was accompanied by Xiao Yu, who loved each other so much that they wanted to hold a wedding in the church to prove their lifelong marriage...It turned out that all of this was his fiction.He branded himself a failure based on the few words of others.The real situation is that he does not know how many times better than Le Congqian.He cleans himself up, loves one-on-one, does not cheat, is not careless, and does not mess with men and women; he studies hard, relying on scholarships for tuition and not relying on his father's shade; he is firm and honest, devoted to love and loyal to Xiao Yu; all these qualities are It is enough to make him proud.After listening to Xiaoyu's narration, he can despise Le Congqian from now on, just like he despises Le Congrang, so that the name no longer affects his mood.But for the sake of Xiao Yu, he kindly put away his little thoughts of gloating and giving him the most fair evaluation.

Li Sichuan took a sip of wine and said: "You inspired Le Congqian's yearning for beauty and pure relationship. He tried hard to get out of his original quagmire. Your beauty and purity gave him the greatest courage, but later you gave him His unfeeling was the real blow, he couldn't bear the disappointment in himself, and the remorse for messing everything up, so he chose to die. You have no reason to blame yourself for his death."

He put the wine glass to Xiao Yu's mouth, and Xiao Yu took a sip from his hand, and said: "Your words are the same as what An Zu persuaded me back then, but although I didn't kill Bo Ren, Bo Ren died because of me."

"You don't know, during the few days when I was in the hospital, he came to my bedside to apologize every day. I just regarded him as transparent and didn't even look at him. I was discharged from the hospital the night before he left London for Bath. In the apartment that Anzu and I rented, he stood under the electric pole downstairs of my apartment in the middle of the night, and I hardened my heart to ignore him. It was London in January, and people could freeze to death at night. I don’t know when he was The last time An Zu saw him through the curtain after leaving the telegraph pole, it was past midnight. He was still there, he didn't know how to stomp his feet, hehe his hands, and he didn't know how to sit in the car." Xiao Yu said and sighed, "It's so pitiful."

Even Li Sichuan was moved when he heard this, and he said: "I know how cruel you are, you did the same thing to me, and I was so angry that I almost hit the wall or strangled you to death."

Xiao Yu shook her head, "This is my fate. I can't tolerate my boyfriend being dishonest to me."

"I am absolutely loyal to you." Li Sichuan immediately stated, "I have never looked at a woman since I met you. I have also told you the several times I have been in love before I met you, and I have nothing for you concealment."

Xiao Yu turned to look at him, smiled at him and said, "I know. If it weren't for your insistence, I wouldn't be able to lie in your arms and say I love you right now."

Li Sichuan was proud, "Who am I? I am the most loyal and honest person in the world."

"You definitely deserve this title." Xiao Yu stretched her neck to kiss him, her position was just enough to reach his chin.Li Sichuan bowed his head and kissed her back, holding her tighter.

"If I had softened my heart, I would have called him, or gone downstairs to talk to him, and he might not have been so determined to die. He followed the route we met at the beginning, from London to Bath, and finally Jump off the Briston Bridge." Xiao Yu sighed, "As he said at the beginning, his name is indeed on the suicide list. People should not swear easily, once they break their oath, they will be sworn in reverse. Kidnapping, you can’t break free, you can’t escape, you have to practice it.”

Li Sichuan listened to her, suddenly remembered something, and checked her ears.She has two eyes in her ears, and the third is blind.

"Where's your third ear?"

"It's grown. I haven't worn it for a long time, and I don't know when the pierced eye will grow." She rubbed her ears and smiled, "Actually, one is enough."

Ears and eyes can grow back, and wounds can heal.

"Do you still believe that there are gods standing three feet above your head?" Li Sichuan asked, "With your insightful eyes, I thought you would have figured it out a long time ago."

"Well, gods do exist. I have seen a lot of strange things since I was a child. At first I didn't understand, and I was frightened. Later, I tried to respond, but my mind was confused. My whole youth It's very confusing, people are busy in adolescence and rebelling with their parents and teachers, while I am immersed in my own small world, without any communication with my peers."

"My memory is surprisingly good. I can see all the things and things that happened when I was a child, no matter how big or small. They are arranged in my mind one by one like a file folder. When I need it, I will open one. I remember clearly what people said and said. Who was there at that time, where was they sitting, what was in their hands, whether it was tea or coffee, whether it was a pen or a book, and if it was a book, I would know what the title was I can see it. I have a camera-like memory." She raised her head and asked Li Sichuan, "I suspect that Grandma opened my eyes, what do you think?"

"Method of Loci! Method of Loci!" Li Sichuan yelled and said, "Xiao Yu, you understood and found the Method of Loci without a teacher. Your intelligence gave you the ability of mental walking. How could Grandma He De dare to covet the sky? She just discovered your potential and activated your perception, but did not tell you the truth, let you in Method Lost in of Loci for so long."

"Mental walking?" Xiao Yu asked suspiciously, "Walking mentally? What is Method of Loci?"

"Memory Palace." Li Sichuan was heartbroken, "You were originally a genius, but your grandma led you astray. If you take the academic path, you will be a great hypnotist or psychologist."

Li Sichuan said quickly: "Listen to me, the Method of Loci is a spatial memory technique invented by the ancient Greek poet Simonides. Once he went to a palace banquet where hundreds of people gathered. He went out temporarily This banquet hall, as a result, the ceiling of the banquet hall collapsed at this time, and the people in the entire banquet hall were smashed to death inside. After cleaning up the remains, the remains were so bloody and bloody that they could not be identified. Simonides relied on his brain The constructed spatial relationship recalls the characteristics of a person to determine its identity. His memory method is named the memory palace. Later generations of philosophers and religious people learn to build their own memory palaces to master a large amount of knowledge and vocabulary. I am reading architecture I learned a little when I was in history, but I didn’t succeed. It’s hard for me to clear my mind and get back to my mind. I used Ebbinghaus’s forgetting curve mental method to memorize professional words. I didn’t expect you to do it easily ,flexible."

He was worried that the words were too fast and the knowledge was too dense for Xiao Yu to understand for a while, so he immediately changed the way of saying: "Have you seen "Shooting the Condors" and "The Condor Gods"? Have you seen them? Do you remember that Zhou Botong created the hand-to-hand fight? The law was passed on to Guo Jing and Xiaolongnu, but Huang Rong didn’t learn it? You are a person with a pure mind like Zhou Botong Xiaolongnu. , The mind can’t stop at all.” Li Sichuan paused for a while when he said this, thinking of the martial arts philosophy system he told the Persian brothers during his studies, it turns out that the simple ideas at that time can be used freely at this moment.

"Simonides?" Xiao Yu thought for a while, "I remember his "Elegy", "Since you are born as a human being, you can't say what will happen to you tomorrow, and if you see someone happy, you can't say what will happen to you tomorrow." How long, because even the long-winged dragonfly that flies away at that moment is not as good as the change of life. 'Si Chuan,' she gazed at her lover, 'why didn't I meet you ten years earlier, so that I wouldn't be in the maze of mind wandered too long and got lost."

Li Sichuan shook his head, "It's useless, I was a bastard ten years ago, let alone ten years ago, I didn't have the ability to enter your thinking palace a year ago? If the time is not up, everything will be in vain."

Xiao Yu thought about it and felt that what he said was right, so she was relieved.

"It's a good thing you have Anzu," Li Sichuan said, "Thinking about Anzu being with you all the time, I can breathe a sigh of relief now."

"If Anzu hadn't been by my side all the time, I wouldn't have known what I would have become." Xiao Yu agreed with him, paused, and said, "Le Congqian said he knew me before, I don't have the slightest impression No."

And Le Congrang, Li Sichuan thought.Le Congrang once said that he and the sisters from the Yu family knew each other early on, so I'm afraid it was somewhat true.It was he who knew the Yu family sisters, not Yu Jin who knew him, and Yu Xiang might really have known him earlier than Yu Jin.He didn't want to say any of this.

He cleverly diverted and said: "Yes, the ability to understand and the scope of cognition are limited, and you will indeed be troubled by the sudden surge of unknown space. If you knew me at that time, I would have given you a long list of books to let You find the answer yourself. Unlike now, I write a list of books for myself, and I will tell you when I find the answer."

Xiao Yu scolded with a smile: "You nerd. Did you read a lot of psychology books for me so that you could act as my own psychiatrist? It turns out that Yingying loves to be a little doctor because you learned it."

"It's not just reading, I specially took a semester of psychology courses."

With this ready opportunity, Li Sichuan will not be willing to give up, he will definitely take credit, and let Xiaoyu know how much he has done for her and to what extent.

"Dare to treat patients after only one semester of study? I'm not afraid of half-level medical treatment." Xiao Yu teased him, "Are you fooling your professor by analyzing my report?"

Sure enough, it was Xiao Yu, and she got it right.But Li Sichuan refused to admit it.

He said: "But you have to admit that what this nerd said is indeed effective. Your situation is like Linghu Chong who has learned the method of absorbing stars, but he can't guide Qi back to his original state, but suffers from it instead."

"Yeah." Xiao Yu said with a smile, "The example you gave is simple and direct, which makes me feel that my situation is a bit similar to that of this hero, so I can't help being a little bit flustered." She smiled again in response to the situation, "Now I think, The so-called gods are more often the torture of their own behavior in the heart. Right and wrong always exist in the world, and people have the heart to do good. Sometimes they are forced by the situation to violate the rules of right and wrong, and they will always feel uneasy. Some people are slow-minded, Torture comes later and slower; some people have complicated thoughts, and the torture is harassed by daily affairs, so they cannot see it; some people are quick-minded, so they are always tortured, so they go crazy."

"Do you often torture yourself?" Li Sichuan asked.

"Well. Sometimes. When I am meditating, it is when my soul is out of my body, that is, when I am torturing myself."

"Then you have been tortured more times than the sand in the Ganges River." Li Sichuan couldn't help but sarcastically said, "Why have I never tortured myself? Am I the dull kind?"

"You're the kind of person whose brains haven't grown yet." Xiao Yu replied, "Your soul hasn't grown yet."

"Haha, this brain shoot is what we call Xinmen, right?" He touched the top of Xiaoyu's head.Xiao Yu was lying on his chest half-needed, he felt it very smoothly, and sighed: "It's really long."

"The one that has been stretched is the Dinghaishen needle, and the one that has not been stretched is the sword-testing stone." Xiao Yu said with a smile, "It has been cut."

"Hahahaha." Li Sichuan laughed again.Li Sichuan told Xiaoyu before that the meaning of the word "cut", in his dialect system, is sometimes equivalent to being beaten.Unexpectedly, Xiao Yu still remembered it, and took it out to make fun of him at this time.Li Sichuan felt sorry for himself even if he wasn't proud.

Xiao Yu hissed and said, "Be gentle, don't wake up the baby."

"Xiao Yu." Li Sichuan said.

"Huh?" Xiaoyu replied.

"I can get what you looked like at that time from your description. Snow-skinned and beautiful, with long hair and big eyes." Like all the heroines in Jin Yong's novels, he likes a type of girl, and later people said That was Xia Meng when she was young.Every heroine in his works is Xia Meng's phantom, and he loves her again and again in his books.

Those eccentric girls are also Li Sichuan's dream lovers.

When he was a teenager, the lover he fantasized about was exactly what she looked like.Thoughtful, absent-minded.He obviously has supernatural abilities that ordinary people don't have, but pretends to be ordinary.Like Huang Rong pretending to be a beggar, like Ren Yingying pretending to be a mother-in-law, like Zhao Min and Yin Susu showing off men's clothes.

"Traveling in the British countryside in the summer, wearing fluffy skirts and wearing headphones all day. If you don't want to listen to it, you can hide in the world of music, which is romantic and uninhibited. Just thinking about it, you will fall in love with you at that time." Li Si Chuan longed for it.

Xiao Yu smiled. "The picture is so beautiful, remember to draw it down and give it to me, so that I can remember my lost youth."

"I think I like you better now." He stroked her shoulder, kissed her earlobe, and whispered in her ear.

"If I met you at the age of 22 when I was 19 years old, I would definitely be attracted to you, but I might not love you to the soul. I can imagine how amazing Le Congqian was when he first saw you - beautiful and pure as just on the sea Born Venus, just like when I first saw you, the mysterious temptation is like Cleopatra wrapped in a carpet, just waiting for me to lift the carpet to marvel at the existence of such beauties in the world. But I was I just love your beautiful face and mysterious temperament, I will admire you and suspect that you were hurt by you and then leave you."

— as he once did.

"Now I think that the essence of love is to have a heart and soul conversation with the person I love. This kind of satisfaction is unparalleled, and I have a religious destination for the first time. Not because you are my God or Goddess, but This kind of understanding makes me feel that the heaven and the earth have spirits, and human beings are the spirits of all things.”

(End of this chapter)