Waiting for a long time, Captain

Chapter 15
It was already late when we returned to the hospital, and Lu Niannian hadn't slept yet, so Gu Zeng talked to him for a while.At this time, Qin Wanfeng was still in the company.The doctor said that he recovered normally and could be discharged to recuperate at home, so he was unwilling to stay in the hospital for an extra day.

"You know my temperament, or maybe it's because of Xiaoxiao, anyway, I don't like this ghost place."

Gu Zeng had no choice but to help him pack up his clothes and put them in the bag.

"It's really good for you to think like this. The company belongs to you, and so does your body. You have to take care of yourself and don't lose your temper all the time." She gave him a discouraged look, full of meaning.

Lu Quannian spread his hands and smiled resignedly.

Thinking of the horrible vacation that was wasted by herself, she said: "I'm going back to Beijing in the next two days, call me anytime if you have any situation."

"Okay." He put his finger in his coat pocket, relying on himself as a patient to ask, "Let me see him."

The Chinese-style courtyard house in Beijing is located behind the castle. It feels a bit like a beggar's house in the imperial city, but Lu always likes it very much.The housekeeper and gardener at home are also Chinese, and everyone chats without effort.

Auntie has worked in the Lu family for many years. When Gu Zeng first arrived in Paris, she has been taking care of her.Later, when she left Paris, Auntie was also sad for a long time.When they heard the news of her illness, they were worried about her relationship with Lu Zhongnian.Bystanders always see better.

This time when she came back, Auntie grabbed her and yelled, her eyes were red.Seeing that Cen was here today, he didn't digress, but just talked about her studying here for the past two years.He listened to it and found it very interesting.

"Who said that Xiao Zeng was not chased by anyone? You don't know. At that time, I followed her back for many years. I just watched from the top of the wall under the tree and vines, whistled at her, and spent the whole afternoon here."

Auntie said proudly, "It's noisy. Every day, people ride motorcycles to chase her back. Mr. Lu hates those young people who are not doing business. He always asks the security to drive them away, but every time they drive away for a while, they run away again." Come here, so every time I go out, I let the driver pick me up."

Gu Zeng took Auntie's hand and bowed his head in embarrassment. Cen embraced her shoulders from behind today, and said with a smile, "Westerners always find it difficult to control Eastern girls, especially beautiful ones."

She looked up and stared at him: "It's not like that."

"I can imagine that they must be like this, at least when they see you, they can't help themselves."

"No, you were misled by Auntie, how can you be so crazy?"

"Huh? No? What's that like?" He deliberately looked at Aunt Aunt in confusion, and the latter smiled at him, revealing a tacit understanding between them.She was really speechless, and quickly pushed him away, just as Lu Zhongnian invited him to play chess, the two men went to the study, and she helped Auntie prepare lunch.

I don't know what to say, the two of them shut up in the study and talked for more than two hours, she lost her mind from time to time, but she was always caught by Auntie, and her thoughts were clearly seen.

"I didn't have anything to say in front of him just now, but now it seems that there is no need to say, he is a good young man." Auntie gave her a thumbs up with admiring eyes, "Xiao Zeng's vision is really good, better than those The yellow-haired boy is much better."

She couldn't help laughing: "Where is it good?"

"hansome."

"Well, it's really handsome."

"He's gentle, and he's very polite."

"It's very polite, but don't you think he has a sense of distance when getting along with others?"

Auntie scratched her head: "Those are not important, the way he looks at you makes me feel at ease, that's enough. Xiao Zeng, we have all witnessed those years. Auntie knows your heart and Mr. I hope you will be well and each other will be well. The most difficult thing in this world is to communicate with each other, but I can see it, and he can see it too, so there is no need to endure it...Really, live a good life and treat yourself well, this is What he wants most, what we most want to see."

"I know." She nodded vigorously, feeling that it was too sensational, she couldn't help but shed tears again, "From the time I came back to today, I have been shedding tears every day, almost turning into tears."

Fan the wind in front of the eyes with hands, keep exhaling, and finally held back.

Auntie smiled, touched her head, turned her head away, and gave her space in a timely manner.She took a deep breath and forced a smile.

When Qin Wanfeng came back, it happened to be meal time, and the two men had finished their conversation. Neither of them could see any special emotions in each other, and the meal was considered happy and harmonious.

Lu had the habit of taking a nap all year round, and since his illness hadn't recovered, he didn't say much, leaving the two of them alone.She walked around the garden twice with Cen today, and she already noticed that he was restless.

"I saw some photos of you when you were a child. It's very cute." Auntie brought scented tea over, and the two of them simply sat in the small pavilion in the garden and talked.He took a sip of tea and continued, "Hair is much longer than it is now."

Gu Zeng's hair is now as long as his shoulders, unlike when he was a child who was pretty and had very long hair, it really was waist-length.Thinking about it now, I find it funny, just because Lu Zhongnian once said that she likes girls with long hair, she never cut her hair again.It was not until I returned to China to study that I cut my hair.

Cen looked at her today, the sun was shining between his eyebrows, he couldn't see clearly, but his voice was very gentle, "How long did you keep your long hair?"

Gu Zeng took a sip of scented tea and said slowly: "Ten years." Or longer than this, in childhood when he didn't realize the word love, even earlier, he would be divided because of his preferences. Extra care.

"I also stayed in the Air Force Department in Atlanta for ten years." It is also because Qu Yanran once said that he likes men who serve in the army, so he has been in the army seriously for ten years.Sometimes I think, if Qu Yanran were her, if he were Lu Zhongnian, maybe those ten years would be completely different.What is the different scene?
Gu Zeng fell silent, the topic started abruptly, she probably guessed something: "You guys just talked about me, are you serious? A Cen, don't hide anything from me."

From the corner of her eye, she caught a glimpse of his hands behind the transparent cup, folded together, sitting there with a straight back, a posture that could be maintained for a long time.There are many habits brought out from the army, and he still has a soldier's breath, but he feels so special, so gentle, not at all like coming off a fighter plane.

"Lu Zhongnian talked about my childhood? God... I had a lot of embarrassing things when I was young, how much did he talk about?" She forced a smile, "It's all gone, doesn't it mean that time will never return?"

"But in everyone's memory, those times that can't come back are the most beautiful." He seemed to see through her pretending to be calm, and slowly stated the facts to her.

"Those real pasts, the memories that you desperately want to forget and let go are the most precious and unforgettable." He smiled faintly, "Give me your hand?"

"Huh?" He didn't get an answer, but he stretched out his hand and was held by him.

Cen looked at her palmistry very carefully today, holding her palm, every finger was in his gaze.

She wanted to laugh a little: "Can you still read palmistry?"

"Not very good," he suddenly wrapped her hand behind his back, held it tightly, and said some nonsense, "Thinking that he can play tricks and trick the beautiful girl into coming home with me."

Gu Zeng was stunned, he had already stretched out his hand to hug her, and wrapped her in his arms: "The more I experience the long darkness, the more I want to bring warmth to the people around me. Gu Zeng, I can feel it, so don't avoid me .”

There are flowers in spring, moon in autumn, cool wind in summer and snow in winter. If you have nothing to worry about, it is a good time in the world.He just regretted that when he met her with grief three years ago, he hadn't asked her deeply why she believed in fate.

In the two hours just now, a man said frankly to him:
In the year my father passed away, the family business was all on my shoulders, and there were almost endless tasks and troubles to deal with, and my temper gradually grew.Sometimes I would yell at Gu Zeng, but every time I lost my temper, I would be very annoyed, and the bad emotions that annoyed me would be dumped on her like garbage.

Once she was so embarrassed by me, she endured without saying a word, and just ran out of the house.I felt so guilty, I chased her out to find her, and saw her being entangled by a group of delinquent teenagers.Anyway, it wasn't very good, and for a long time afterwards, she didn't dare to go out alone.She suffered from timidity or sadness, and the original source was me, and it was I who affected her.

I can't tell how it got here all these years, but it's obvious that I hurt her first.

I was really ashamed and tried many ways to comfort her and help her rebuild her sense of security.When I thought these actions would comfort a little girl, I saw her praying in church, praying for my health and contentment.

I just thought it was funny, and I heard her say that people who lose their temper often have a bad spleen because they don’t feel happy in their hearts, so she really worked hard to make me happy.At that moment, I couldn't laugh anymore.

A big man who can't handle things, and gets angry with people close to him every day. The most important thing is that she was wronged, but she was still worried about me... Later, my heart became clearer and clearer. As long as it has nothing to do with life and death, it's not a big deal.At that time, I told myself that she is my dearest person in this world, and I have to treat her well.

Afterwards, by chance, I started to do charity. I was a little superstitious, thinking that I would get some blessings by doing so.I've always had a bad temper, but I always thought that was the only way to make up for the damage done to her, especially after seeing her feelings.

There are two countries between me and her, when we can't get close, when we can't hurt anymore, we are both still sick.Sometimes I think about it, if the person I love is her, will everything be gone?But the truth is not like this, there is no way, there is really no way.

Lu Zhongnian said that he didn't have any great achievements in his life to detail, but every step he took before was extremely bad. He made his closest relatives experience many years of torture and pain. Seeing her relief and happiness.

The initial change in personality was also due to Gu Zeng. Because of her softness and beauty, he wanted to win some luck for her.She is really a very soft girl, but it is also very bad at the same time. If she is not happy, she will really hide it very deeply, so that others can't see it at all.

"I've never seen a girl who is so tolerant, such a bitter girl, it really makes people feel distressed. If she didn't have Xiaoxiao when she came to me at the age of 17, I would love her."

There are too many things to talk about, and it is impossible to say clearly for a while. How can the relationship of more than ten years be so easily finished?But Lu Zhongnian's conclusion really made him... a little bitter and a little scared.

Qu Yanran likes to take things by force, and is as enthusiastic as many Western women. She will directly say what she wants to do, or when she is in a bad mood, she wants to spend money, and she will go to nightclubs to play in different ways. To vent, you don't need to consider other people's opinions or visions.

But Gu Zeng is different, she restrains herself, is very polite, does not attack others, and more often focuses on other people's moods.Because he was too cowardly, he pinned his hopes on fate, so, based on what he saw now and at this moment, he had a very direct and strong feeling—her grief had not fully recovered , or she is still sick.

He held her hand and rubbed it subconsciously a few times. His fingertips pressed against the back of her hand, which also felt cold to the touch.He thought for a while and hesitated: "Do you want to change the flight?"

Gu Zeng looked at him suspiciously, and heard him say: "Come back with me tonight, okay?"

His voice is a little low, which is not his usual style.

"A Cen, are you tempting me with your beauty?" She slowly raised her head to look at him, then looked at the time on her watch, and muttered, "I'll be a little rushed if we leave now."

At this moment, his eyes are dark and thick, like the ink sprinkled on the walls of the temple, surging in the silence.

She paused, looked at the small courtyard not far away, and smiled a little: "But the driver named Lu Zhongnian will take us to the airport, there should be still time. I just want to trouble you to abuse your power and change my ticket .”

He said softly: "I am willing to serve the beauty."

The plane at eleven o'clock in the evening, it was just nine o'clock when they arrived at the airport.Forget the time, you can go to eat something.When Cen was arranging checked luggage today, she grabbed her mobile phone and sent text messages to Lu Zhongnian. She wrote many messages and finally deleted them.

She lowered her head to avoid the people around her, and was bumped several times without paying attention, almost knocking her phone away.After thinking about it, I finally gave up and reported him safe when I returned to Beijing.

Putting the phone back into the bag, I saw Cen coming from the check-in aisle today.It may be because the lights at the airport are too bright, which makes his whole face look a little white, or in other words, he has given people such a feeling all year round, fair and clean.

"In this kind of place, don't always press your phone with your head down. Remember those two kids at the Atlanta airport?"

Sometimes unexpected things happen, for example, if the person just started running, he will knock her down.

Gu Zeng gave him a guilty look and nodded repeatedly.The two of them didn't eat much, and got on the plane soon.She didn't sleep very much these days, and fell asleep as soon as she touched the seat. When she woke up, she found that he was still reading a magazine. His brows and eyes were very energetic, and she probably hadn't slept all the time.

She took a sip of water and looked around subconsciously. Most of the people were already asleep, and a very few were still excited, looking around, just like her.

She retracted her head, Cen Tian noticed, put down the magazine, and began to communicate with her softly.

"Do you want to sleep a little longer?"

She shook her head: "it's okay now, not very sleepy. Don't you want to sleep for a while?"

"I'm fine, too." He turned slightly sideways, turned off the light above his head, and completely darkened the space between the two of them.He pulled up the thin blanket on her body to remind her not to catch cold.

"What time is it now?"

The setting and the atmosphere were too good for rest, and she felt ashamed that she might be falling asleep again.

Cen said today, "Two o'clock in the morning."

She groaned softly, and the drowsiness hit again. After holding on for a while, she realized that it didn't seem necessary, so she simply closed her eyes.In the very quiet cabin, the people around you breathe evenly, making light sleepers feel that they should also fall asleep.However, there will be such a feeling that it keeps stimulating her when she is particularly sleepy, making her feel something is wrong.The environment was too quiet, too quiet, something was wrong, and suddenly he opened his eyes again.

I bumped into his gaze unexpectedly, and she was still awake, looking at her thoughtfully.

"Ah Cen, do you want to talk to me?"

Cen adjusted his posture today, reached under the thin blanket, held her hand, thought for a while and said seriously: "If you still have energy."

She was fully awake, held his hand in the dark, and nodded: "Okay, I'm not sleepy now, not at all."

"Continuing the unfinished topic from last time, about why I became, uh... so gentle." His eyes were focused, "I mentioned to you before that during an operation in Atlanta, the border maintenance challenge I was in a bad mood at the time when I felt hostile to the enemy, and I thought about being bombed just like that, but in fact... it’s not just a thought.”

She woke up completely and took a low breath.

In the dark, his voice was clearer and more straightforward: "At that time, I want to settle everything."

He obviously couldn't see his face clearly, but he still felt a little sad.

"Because of my mistake, the fighter plane was attacked repeatedly, and my companion was targeted to protect me. In the end, the helicopter he was driving was shot down and fell into the lake." He spoke very slowly, every word was very clear, and cruel.

"He died because he saved me. As I said, that Sudanese comrade-in-arms, he only washed our clothes for one year, not because he was transferred, nor did he drop out of school, but left. For a long period of time, the time for students to take a bath was very short, and the clothes were piled up together, and they were not washed unless it was absolutely necessary, and even if they were washed, they were very restrained. That whole year, our dormitory used the least amount of water in the whole building."

Gu Zeng carefully unbuckled his seat belt and held his face. In the dark, someone turned on the phone. In such a weak light, their eyes met, and she saw the redness of his eyes, implying a faint smile. of depression.

"I became gentle and kind in order to atone for my sin."

At this moment, after ten years of cold and warm, his face, his past, has been completely opened to her.

Many things happened in that year. Shortly before the sacrifice of Sudan’s comrade-in-arms, Qu Yanran got married for the first time, and only sent him a text message to inform him of the time and place of the wedding.Then before the action, because of some trivial matters, the whole dormitory was very unhappy, and even during the action because of disagreements with each other, they had a big fight, and then went to the river together to find comrades in arms.At the end of the new year, the small border town was deserted, and the water was almost freezing. Several men hugged their heads and cried.Holding the cold bodies of comrades-in-arms, all of them are pious and compassionate.After returning, he suffered from grief.

I have been bathing in cold water for so many years, I can't say why.Keep yourself awake all the time to remember how cold the river was, or punish yourself for killing your comrades because you didn't know how to treat yourself well?The result will not change.

He repeated calmly: "In your eyes, I, who is gentle and kind, used to be unbearable. Some things I can do now, including my attitude towards life, are all for atonement."

Gu Zeng came back to Beijing for three days before meeting Qingya and Xu Shen for dinner.Mentioning that Lu Zhongnian's condition was really improving, Qin Wanfeng called to say that he was in a much better mood recently and wanted to go to the fashion show.

Qing Ya was speechless all the time, lamenting that his temperament had changed drastically, and she kept saying, "It's really not easy for people to see many things clearly once they get sick."

"One disease, one event, and many predisposing factors will change a person's life, which is explained in electromagnetism." Xu Shen explained the effect of magnetic field with scientific principles.

When she was studying, she liked to read these books on electromagnetic fields. She felt that ghosts and gods theories existed in this world. Even though she didn’t believe in religion, she felt that everything could be explained by magnetic fields. Don't look back on the past, just keep looking forward.

Perhaps many people should be like this, she and him.

But in this case, there is no scientific reason to explain it.After getting off the plane that day, he sent her home. He didn't even have the strength to drive back. He slept with her for a long time and didn't say a word when he woke up.

"Gu Xiaobai, do you have something on your mind?"

"Ok?"

"Your eyes are dull and your expression is dull. Since we started talking to now, have you listened to a word?" Qingya stared at her, and quickly analyzed the reason with a woman's sixth sense, "The relationship with the captain What happened in between?"

Xu Shen guessed: "Did you have a quarrel in Paris because of Lu Zhongnian?"

"No." She cheered up and took a sip of coffee, looked at the two friends in front of her, and tried to analyze, "If, I mean if, when I was suffering from sadness three years ago, you didn't pay attention to me, and you How would you two feel if I got drunk, had an accident, or made my life a lot worse than it is?"

She knew that this metaphor was not very appropriate, so Qingya looked at her like she was looking at a monster.On the other hand, Xu Shen was much more calm, and said directly: "There is no such if, if there is, it is also if you have never met Lu Zhongnian, then the following things will not happen."

Qingya nodded: "If there are so many ifs in this world, I'd be crazy if I regret that the medicine wasn't sold sooner."

"Xiaobai, what has happened is inevitable. You will suffer from grief because of Lu Zhongnian's words and actions. There will also be many people in this world who will get sick or face death because of one person or one thing. Both are immutable directional events."

"Can't it be changed?" She murmured, "So, there is really no if."

"What are you talking about?" Qingya scratched her head and looked at her.

"It's nothing, it's just..." She lifted her head up, looked at the ceiling, her eyes widened, and held back something, whispering to herself, "I just feel sorry for him."

(End of this chapter)