Sadness begins with your name

Chapter 21
Just after the Spring Festival, Ning Qinglan and I headed south with our simple luggage.

The scenery along the road is very beautiful, but I can't always be happy.As far as Nanjing, our mother and daughter took the ferry to Zhenjiang. The river wind was blowing on our faces, and the vast waters were everywhere. The misty sky was like a dream. slow talk.

The gloomy mood eased a little, I asked my mother: "Where are we going to live?"

Ning Qinglan was dressed up very beautifully, with a snow-blue ruffled hat and huge sunglasses covering half of her face. She was wearing a camel-colored cashmere trench coat with an off-white long skirt inside, which was elegant yet graceful.On the other hand, I was wearing the usual style of Mickey’s blue sweater, white jeans, and my messy hair was imprisoned by a peaked cap. Because I was thin and had thin facial features, people on the road often regarded me as a boy.

She leaned against the railing of the ferry, with the ever-changing clouds and mists behind her, narrowing her eyes slightly, she seemed to recall something from a long time ago: "You have an uncle in Zhenjiang."

Since leaving home at the age of 18, Ning Qinglan has never returned to Zhenjiang.

Now, her parents are both dead, and the only blood connection is that elder brother Ning Qingzhan who once slapped her and kicked her out of the house.

When Ning Qinglan was a teenager, he was also a rebellious boy, surly and frivolous. With his outstanding appearance and talent, he attracted a lot of men and women. hand.In her third year of high school, she suddenly had the idea of ​​going to Beijing to become a star, and she refused to even take the college entrance examination.Due to her family's strength, she reluctantly took the college entrance examination, but deliberately filled in the wrong choice, which resulted in her failure.Her father couldn't afford to be ill because of this, but she picked up her luggage and insisted on leaving home.

The furious older brother Ning Qingzhan slapped her peach-like young face: "If you don't make a fool of yourself, never enter this door."

After the Lantern Festival, we stepped into the small courtyard of the Ning family hidden in a deep old alley.

A man in his 40s wearing a light gray cashmere sweater, black cloth trousers, and black cloth shoes stepped out head-on. His facial outline was somewhat similar to Ning Qinglan's, but there was a more serene and peaceful demeanor between his brows.

"Little sister." He smiled slightly, stretched his arms slowly, and there was crystal moisture in his slightly slender eyes: "Welcome back."

Ning Qinglan also smiled reservedly, but slowly, tears oozed from the corners of her eyes.

The two brothers and sisters hugged gently, and after a while, my uncle took the suitcase, turned around and saw me, and smiled kindly: "Is this the little carrot head?"

Ning Qinglan pushed me, "Xiasha, quickly call Uncle."

"Uncle." I whispered.

A big warm hand patted my shoulder, and Ning Qingzhan said with emotion: "You were not much older than her when you left home. However, this child looks much better than you did back then."

This is the first time someone praised me for being well-behaved. I laughed secretly in my heart, and Ning Qinglan also laughed: "You're so naughty. Brother, I want to transfer her to go to school in the county."

My uncle pulled me in, "Yes. You can study here in high school. Now, there are many students from the No. [-] County High School who are admitted to Tsinghua University and Peking University every year. How is this child studying?"

Ning Qinglan shook her head.

Chatting and laughing all the way, I saw my aunt and a quiet and taciturn cousin again in my uncle's house, which was not very spacious but seemed warm and peaceful.

For a period of time after that, I stayed at my uncle's house, and Ning Qinglan took clothes, paper, pens and some simple daily necessities to a small town dozens of miles away. She said that a friend introduced that there was a nursing home there. Comfortable for writing.

She said, no one should bother her.When she misses us, she will come back by car.

I transferred to the middle school where my cousin Ning Xiaoxiao was.

Three months later, when the senior high school entrance examination came, I did not return to M City, but took the examination at the local middle school.

The south of the Yangtze River is good, and the scenery is familiar to us in the past. At sunrise, the river flowers are more red than the fire, and the river is as blue as the wind blows. Who doesn't remember Jiangnan?
I am in the south of the Yangtze River, and he is in the north.For three months, we had no contact.

But this kind of connection was obviously broken by me bit by bit.

The fact that he doesn't like me gives me every reason not to look back.

On the day when the senior high school entrance examination ended, my aunt cooked a table of good meals, and my uncle opened a bottle of Huadiao and poured a little into the small bowls in front of everyone.

"How did you do in the exam?"

"Okay." I replied dumbly.Since I came to Zhenjiang, my temper has been restrained a lot. Maybe it's because I've grown up and understand that living in a sojourn here should not make things difficult for them.

"Yesterday, the Chinese teacher praised my cousin in the class, saying that she wrote a good composition." The cousin, who has always been quiet, suddenly interrupted, and looked at me with some anxiety.

Uncle laughed happily: "That is! Who called her the writer's daughter..."

Their whole family is very proud of Ning Qinglan, I thought silently, time can heal everything.What absurd young man was so crazy back then, after many years, he will always be forgiven by time.

I hope that the mistakes I have made can be forgiven by Old Man Time one by one.

Ning Qinglan didn't come back to visit us within the agreed time.So as soon as the admission letter came out, my uncle and I went to a nursing home dozens of miles away.

This small nursing home called "Yawu" was built by a northern businessman. On the one hand, he managed to make money, and on the other hand, he kept it for himself and his family.

Ning Qinglan lived in the second room on the third floor of the North District. A young girl led the way in front, her white overalls were decorated with shiny buttons.

"She's not in good health recently, and her family should come and see her when she has time." After knocking on the door lightly, the girl turned her head and lowered her voice: "I think she's quite lonely, a little bit of depression."

The milky white door was closed tightly, and the girl knocked for a long time but there was no answer. She looked around downstairs and said, "Maybe I went to write by the lake, let's look for it over there."

"How is she doing here? Is she eating well, is she used to living here?" Thinking of her forgetting to eat and sleep as soon as she started writing a manuscript, I panicked.

The girl is a staff member of the nursing home. She blinked her eyes and smiled in a working way: "Of course, our accommodation and food conditions here are all first-class." Provide food and lodging for customers, etc.

My uncle chatted with her from time to time, and I walked quickly ahead.

When I boarded a bluestone arch bridge that is common in the south of the Yangtze River, and I could already see the lake through the willow trees, a man suddenly ran towards me and almost bumped into me. Fortunately, I was agile enough, and my shoulders flashed. On one side, the man brushed my shoulder and ran over, and the wind that was blown up was mixed with the familiar and faint fragrance of green grass.

The very familiar taste made my heart twitch.Turning around suddenly, all I saw was the back of a boy going away.

He is tall and thin, with a clear back, wearing a white jacket and blue jeans. At this moment, he is running towards the southwest direction of the nursing home with two slender legs.

But is that him?
My eyes followed that figure closely until it disappeared. My brain was empty, and my chest seemed to be blocked by something, which made me feel uncomfortably stuffy.

A few months have passed, we have not seen each other, maybe he has forgotten me long ago, but who knows that I miss him, and the days are like years.

Lin Beifeng, I miss you.

But I never even wrote him a letter.

"Shasha." My uncle's shout pulled me out of my depressed mood. He pointed to a small green pavilion by the lake not far away, "Your mother seems to be there, let's go there quickly."

Looking back in panic, the figure is no longer there.Perhaps, I was wrong.

Walking along the path covered with pebbles, there is a small wooden table in a small pavilion surrounded by water on three sides. A thin woman is lying quietly in a big wicker chair, as if she is asleep. , a thick stack of manuscripts was rattled by the wind.

I gently put my hand on her face, so thin, this woman.I don't know what she thinks in her heart, what kind of story and life she is trying to express and write.

Uncle patted her awake, "Little sister, go back to sleep. It's very windy here."

She opened her eyes, and there was a trace of surprise in her bloodshot eyes: "Are you here?"

After finishing the sentence, she suddenly started coughing. I thought she had been exposed to the cool breeze by the lake, and I wanted to pull her up. Unexpectedly, her cough became more severe, and a dry and empty sound came from the chest cavity, as if she was about to cough out her lungs.

"Mom?" I panicked.

She covered her mouth and waved to me comfortingly, but bent down in pain.

I noticed that the faces of the uncle and the leading girl were very serious.

After a long while, she finally calmed down, and her face slowly turned from gray to pale.The current Ning Qinglan looks really distressed.

"Sand sand." She gave me a weak smile.

I thought she would be fine.

Unexpectedly, she frowned and suddenly vomited loudly.In order not to stain her clothes, she turned sideways and tried to tilt her head out of the wicker chair, but when she exerted a lot of force, the whole person fell out of the wicker chair.

She fell to the ground and vomited vigorously, her voice was hoarse and her fingers were digging on the ground, showing clear bones.

My heart was in a heap, and I stood at a loss, my uncle hurried to help her, and the girl took the walkie-talkie and said hurriedly: "There is someone by the lake who needs first aid, come to the doctor, come to the doctor."

At this moment, I watched a small ball of bright red liquid spit out of Ning Qinglan's mouth...

(End of this chapter)