Meet you in the most beautiful years

Chapter 12 Zhang Youyi: Even Dreams Are Deep and Lovely (1)
he married a woman he didn't love
In fact, in my heart, among the three women in Xu Zhimo's life, she is the most admirable.

She is an incense in a green furnace, half of it is burned and then extinguished, the smoke clears, and the remaining half stands silently in the furnace, standing for hundreds of thousands of years, without any regrets or sorrows or joys.Only in the low-turning wind, occasionally a faint agarwood will strike, telling you that she has always been there.

There are not many photos left by her, one single photo, her cute and cute eyes wide open, like a green fruit on a branch in mid-spring, her pure appearance is lovable; The men stood side by side, she wanted to squeeze a smile, but her face was full of restraint and stiffness, which made those who pity her feel sad.Not long after this photo was taken, her man Xu Zhimo published a notice in the newspaper announcing his divorce from her.

From the moment they married into Xu's family, they were doomed to have very different attitudes.Even if she became his first wife, she just stood with him on the same stone steps as a cloud ladder. He always stood taller than her, looking down at her expressionlessly, making her look up humble and restrained.

Zhang Youyi is Xu Zhimo's first woman.Like Jiang Dongxiu, they are both heroines of old-style marriages.But when he married Jiang Dongxiu, Hu Shi had already returned from studying abroad; and Xu Zhimo, who married Zhang Youyi at that time, was only a middle school student.

1915, maybe a little earlier.If it was a few years later, he might have rejected the matchmaker's marriage contract.That year, Chen Duxiu's "Youth Magazine" had just been published in Shanghai, and the New Culture Movement was still in its infancy. Xu Zhimo, who had turned 18, had just graduated from Hangzhou No. [-] Middle School, and he had no time to get in touch with the wider world. This fledgling young master of the Xu family accepted the marriage arranged by his father in a ignorant way.

In the early years of the Republic of China, the Xu family was a well-known wealthy family in Xiashi Town, Haining County, Zhejiang Province.His father, Xu Shenru, is the chairman of the Xia Shek Chamber of Commerce. He not only runs a local bank, soy sauce garden, silk factory, and silk shop, but also owns a large number of industries in Shanghai and Hangzhou.Although Xu Zhimo is the son of Xu Shenru's second wife, he is the only son of the Xu family. Therefore, from birth, the life of the young master of the Xu family, although not comparable to that of Jia Baoyu, who is in the powder pile, is also a honey pot, full of love and affection.

His real name is Zhang Yan, and his courtesy name is Qiansen.It is said that when he was one year old, a monk named Zhihui touched the top of his head and vowed that "this son will become a great weapon". In the future, he was indeed very intelligent. When he was going to study in the United States in 1918, his father changed his name to "Zhimo", by remembering monk Zhihui's auspicious words, encouraged him to achieve success in his studies.

Regardless of the origin of the name, as a representative poet of the Crescent School, he is indeed intelligent and sensitive, which may be his natural talent.The young Zhimo is not only "a wild horse without a bridle", but also like Jia Baoyu who "talks to swallows when he sees swallows, and talks to fish when he sees fish in the river". Heart.

When I was young, every Mid-Autumn Festival night, I sat outside the building window and waited to watch the "Moonlight".If there are clouds and mist in the sky, I will worry about the "bright moon".If I see the scale-like clouds, my heart will be happy, and I pray silently for the moon to bloom soon, because I often hear people say that as long as there are "corrugated" clouds, there will be moonlight...

——(Xu Zhimo's "Autumn Thoughts on the Indian Ocean")
His sensitive poetic mind may have been inherited from his family. Although the Xu family who were in business at that time was not a poet, but since then, they have produced a large number of talents, and all of them are celebrities in the cultural world: Jin Yong is Zhimo’s cousin, and Shen Junru is his cousin. Uncle, and Ms. Qiong Yao from Taiwan is Zhimo's cousin and niece.After careful study, their ancestors all had a continuous relationship with the Xu family in Haining.

In 1910, Xu Zhimo graduated from Xiashi Kaizhi Academy with the best grades in the school. Under the introduction of his cousin Shen Junru, he was admitted to Hangzhou Fuzhong and became a classmate with Yu Dafu.He fell in love with literature, science and astronomy, and frequently published articles in the school journal.During this period, he has been the best student in Hangzhou Fuzhong.

In the summer of 1915, Zhimo graduated from middle school and was admitted to Shanghai Baptist College.This year, his lush youth is like breaking through the sky in Hsinchu, and he is already Yu Lang's young, handsome and outstanding.In this year, a strange woman suddenly appeared in his life, 15-year-old Zhang Youyi, who married into Xu's family.

If this is an unfortunate marriage, then the instigator of this misfortune is Zhang Youyi's fourth brother, Zhang Jiaao.

At that time, the Zhang family in Baoshan County, Shanghai was a well-known family.Zhang Youyi's grandfather was a Juren in the former Qing Dynasty and once served as county magistrate in Neijiang and Pingshan in Sichuan.His father, Zhang Runzhi, has practiced medicine and business for many years, and has eight sons and four daughters. Zhang Youyi, born in 1900, is the second daughter of the Zhang family.In Zhang Youyi's memory, there are many people in the Zhang family, not only each has its own kitchen servant, but there is even a servant who specializes in making shoes for the Zhang family.

Perhaps thanks to the edification of the Confucian family tradition, the children of the Zhang family are all virtuous when they grow up, and more than half of them have become celebrities.The eldest, Zhang Jiabao, is a famous industrialist in Shanghai and the owner of the Shanghai Cotton Oil Factory; the second, Zhang Junmai, studied in Japan and served as the chairman of the Central Committee of the Democratic Socialist Party, and is an active politician and philosopher; the fourth, Zhang Jiaao, is a famous financial Zhang Jiazhu, the eighth young master, used to be the manager of a Chinese vegetable company; and Zhang Yujiu, the owner of the famous Crescent Bookstore in the 30s, was also the young master of the Zhang family.

In 1913, Zhang Jiaao, who was the secretary of Zhu Rui, governor of Zhejiang Province at the time, visited Hangzhou Fuzhong. When reviewing students' work, he read an article that made him admire. The style of writing was very similar to that of Mr. Liang Qichao whom he admired.The author of this article is the talented Xu Zhimo.

Immediately, he felt his eyes light up.This rare and good article is unique in his previous inspections.Zhang Jiaao felt that the young man who wrote the article was a shining jewel, which would shine brightly when the time was right.He secretly investigated the origin of this young scholar, and when he learned that he was the young master of a rich and good family in the local area, he felt that there was no need to do more investigations. Zhang Youyi, who was studying at the No. [-] Women's Normal School, acted as a matchmaker to propose marriage.

Zhang Jiaao couldn't wait to write a letter to Xu Shenru, hoping that the two families would get married for a hundred years.The Zhang family in Baoshan was already a dignitary in Shanghai, so of course Xu Shenru couldn't ask for it, and immediately wrote back: "Xu Shenru is fortunate to have Zhang Jiaao's sister as his daughter-in-law", and he fully agreed to this marriage.

Obviously, the father's promise was for "Zhang Jia'ao's younger sister". The prominent family status was his bargaining chip; but the young master of the Xu family, who was the party to the marriage, was only indifferent and helpless in the face of his father's palpable joy. .

A small photo was presented in front of his eyes.He glanced at the woman in the photo, and spat out a few words in a disdainful tone: "Country bumpkin!"

The first acquaintance was through the exchange of photos between the two.They are still ignorant, whether they like it or dislike it, they don't need to hide it.At that time, Zhang Youyi didn't know that Master Xu's first impression of her was actually so annoying.Many years later, she still clearly remembers the moment when she saw Xu Zhimo's photo for the first time. Although she described it plainly, it still makes people feel that it was a legendary moment.

I first heard my husband's name when I was 13 years old.When my parents came home from school on vacation, they called me into the living room and handed me a small silver box.

I wondered: "What is this for?"

Look at his picture, they said.I opened the box and saw a picture of a young man with a big head, a pointed chin, and round gold-rimmed glasses.

Dad wants to know what I think of the man in the picture.

I closed the box without a word.Since my eldest sister had her fortune-telling, the family has been looking forward to this moment, so I followed my family's expectations and said, "I have no objection."

According to the Chinese tradition at the time, this was the case: I was going to marry the man my family had chosen for me.

——(Zhang Bangmei's "Little Feet and Suit: Zhang Youyi and Xu Zhimo's Family Change")
Her engagement so early was indeed related to her sister's fortune-telling.The result of the fortune-telling is that if Youyi's sister gets married before the age of 25, her husband will die and her family will be ruined.Therefore, the marriage of the second daughter, Youyi, should only be carried out in advance.

In fact, the young Youyi is not rustic, but a bit of a delicate and naive youth.What Zhimo likes are "educated women", who are delicate and smart, and can ignite his romantic poetic heart and passion.Zhang Youyi is dignified and virtuous enough, and later facts prove that she is a gentle and respectable woman.But these advantages, to the young master of the Xu family who grew up in a wealthy life, no matter how good they are, they are just dusty pearls. He can't see the luster, and he has no intention to explore her soft and beautiful qualities.

Although he was not happy, Xu Zhimo at that time still respected "the order of his parents and the words of the matchmaker", and calmly accepted the marriage arranged by his father.

The abundance of dowries in the Zhang family is so enviable.Not only the dowry was purchased from Europe, but the furniture alone could not even fit in a train carriage. In the end, Youyi's sixth brother specially used a barge to transport it from Shanghai to Kip Shek.She was looking forward to the day when the sixth brother came back, because until now, the Zhang family had only seen this legendary son-in-law in photos.

As for what kind of person my future husband will be, Sixth Brother said with piercing eyes: "He is very talented and has a bright future."

Brother Liu said that Xu Zhimo's ambition and courage are extraordinary.

Of course, I'm glad to hear that.I thought I was married to a man who was as forward-thinking as my brother, but still traditional, with a firm set of values.

——(Zhang Bangmei's "Little Feet and Suit: Zhang Youyi and Xu Zhimo's Family Change")
On October 1915, 10, Zhang Youyi, the second daughter of the Zhang family in Baoshan County, Shanghai, married to Haining, Zhejiang Province, and held a grand wedding with Xu Zhimo in the Chamber of Commerce Hall of Xiashi Town.On that day, she looked affectionate, shy and charming. She was wearing a pink dress with dragons and phoenixes and a Chinese-style crown on her head. Under the dress, there were a pair of heavenly feet. She felt a little uneasy about it.

When she was young, her mother bound her feet, and on the fourth day the pain was excruciating. Under her screams, the second elder brother Junmai couldn't bear it anymore, and begged his mother to untie the dense cloth strips on her feet, and said to his mother: "If no one marries her in the future, I am willing to take care of her for the rest of my life."

She is glad that the man she married is a new-style youth. In his eyes, maybe her little feet are no more beautiful than her natural feet, but there is still an unknown secret hidden in her heart. cannot be his bride.

Back then, the fortune teller had seen her and Zhimo's birthday horoscopes, and decided that their zodiac signs were incompatible and could not last long.Under the Zhang family's repeated weighing, when reporting Youyi's birth year to the Xu family, they concealed two years old.The changed zodiac sign matches Zhimo very well. Xu's family praised the marriage as a match made in heaven. Only she knows that this is a secret that cannot be told.

At 15 years old, she is still a simple girl.She naively thought that since this man married her, she would spend the rest of her life with him.She only needs to be a dignified and virtuous woman, and live a sweet and warm life with him wholeheartedly. In this life, she will be safe and content, and she will have nothing to ask for.

When Zhimo reached out to lift her hijab, she was so frightened and excited that she trembled involuntarily.

As much as I wanted to act like a modern girl, I couldn't, I just stared at his long, pointed chin.I had hoped that when he saw me for the first time, he would smile at me, but his eyes were always serious.

...I was young and timid at the time, maybe a new-style woman would speak at this time, and a couple of newlyweds would start a bridal night.But Xu Zhimo didn't say a word to me, so I didn't answer him.The silence between us began that night.

——(Zhang Bangmei's "Little Feet and Suit: Zhang Youyi and Xu Zhimo's Family Change")
They were so scribbled at the beginning, which seemed to pave the way for the future separation.What he wants is heartbeat, what he wants is love, and what he wants is the softness and romance of a woman.His little lady only has the three obedience and four virtues of an old-fashioned woman, and the submissiveness with low eyebrows and low voice.

Although Youyi is not sensitive and sensitive, her husband's indifference still hurts her heart.She is a daughter of a famous family. Before marrying into Xu's family, she lived a life full of luxury and good care. Now that she is the daughter-in-law of Xu's family, she puts aside the habit of being pampered, serves her in-laws, and takes care of his daily life. I asked myself if I was not being rude, but I couldn't warm the man's cold expression.

Her initial expectation of a happy life, like the snow on the roof tiles under the sun, dissipated little by little and became unreachable.In her later years, she recalled Xu Zhimo's disdain for her, and remembered an unforgettable past event.Once, when Xu Zhimo was reading in the yard, his back suddenly felt itchy, so he asked his servant to come over and scratch it for him. She happened to be by his side, so she walked over to help him of course.At that time, he didn't say a word, but gave her a look of contempt and annoyance. That look was like a fence full of thorns, which separated her abruptly and stopped her decisively and severely.

In Xu Zhimo's eyes, Miss Zhang's second daughter's prominent family background and other things cannot be a source of pride.He doesn't love her at all.His eyes almost never meet her, occasionally falling on her, and only passing lightly.To him, this woman he doesn't love is just Xu's daughter-in-law, but definitely not his lover.

Zhang Youyi was helpless and sad. In front of him, she became more and more cautious and at a loss, losing her confidence bit by bit.She knew this man's heart, she couldn't grasp it.

Despite the pain and loss, she always remembered what her mother said to her when she got married.Mother said: Marry into the Xu family, you are the woman of the Xu family.Remember, first, you must never say "no" willfully, only "yes"; second, no matter what happens with your man, you must always treat your in-laws with the same attitude.

So, she guarded the huge Xu family mansion and lived a lonely and deserted life.Greet your parents-in-law sooner or later, be courteous and filial, and abide by the duty of a daughter-in-law.The new daughter-in-law should not show her face in public, so she would stay out of the door, lock herself in her room, make shoes for her mother-in-law one pair after another, and embroider mandarin ducks and butterflies stitch by stitch.In those exquisite patterns and gorgeous colors, she consumes fragrant longing and every inch of empty time.

At that time, Xu Zhimo was more and more graceful and handsome.She had a sad premonition that she could hardly hold on to such a man.

Mismatched feet and suits

In the late autumn of 1915, after marriage, Xu Zhimo left Xiashi to continue his studies in Shanghai.

When Xu Shenru chose to study at Shanghai Baptist College, he considered being close to home so that he could balance life and study after marriage.However, Shanghai Baptist College is a missionary school run by Americans. Xu Zhimo, who first arrived in Shanghai, did not like the glitz of the city, nor did he like the rigid rituals and courses of the missionary college, so he only studied in Shanghai. In the autumn of 1916, he was transferred to the law preparatory class of Beiyang University in Tianjin.In the autumn of the following year, the law department of Beiyang University was merged into Peking University, and he also entered Peking University, majoring in law, and minoring in political science, Japanese, French, and Chinese and foreign literature.

At that time, Beiping was in a melee between warlords, and people's grievances were boiling.After Yuan Shikai's death, Li Yuanhong and Duan Qirui staged a dispute between the government and the court. Later, Zhang Xun entered Beijing and supported the restoration of Xuantong. After the restoration farce that lasted only twelve days died down, Duan Qirui provoked the Civil War again.

At this time, in the cultural and academic circles, new thoughts are still emerging, and new cultures are sprouting. A group of cultural elites who have returned from overseas are leading the new cultural trend, and the admiration of Western learning has gradually become a fashion.

During his studies in Peiping, Xu Zhimo once lived in the residence of military strategist Jiang Baili.Jiang Baili is a fellow of Zhimo's Haining Xiashi. When he was the principal of Baoding Military Academy in 1913, he couldn't fulfill his promise to the students. He committed suicide after convening a student meeting. Fall in love, get married.

Xu Zhimo admired this legendary experience.This kind of love is what he longs for. He has a wild horse in his heart, and there are many mighty spring breezes. He is looking forward to a romantic hangover, and he is getting tired of the marriage that his matchmaker said.

Even so, he and Zhang Youyi's eldest son, A Huan, came to the world in April 1918.

In the early summer of this year, under Jiang Baili's introduction and Zhang Junmai's introduction, Xu Zhimo officially became a teacher and became Mr. Liang Qichao's disciple.In Hu Shi's eyes, "Xu Zhimo is Mr. Liang Rengong's favorite student." Although Liang Qichao, who was a witness at the wedding with Lu Xiaoman, scolded the couple angrily, this did not prevent Zhimo from becoming his most proud student.

In August 1918, Xu Zhimo accepted Liang Qichao's suggestion and set off to study in the United States.He has longed for the desire to go abroad for a long time, but he still feels that he owes his parents an explanation.The so-called "parents are here, don't travel far", the so-called "there are three unfilial acts, the greatest is to have no offspring", but at this moment, with A Huan's birth, all of them seem to be solved easily.

"Since the problem of the child's interest is resolved, Xu Zhimo has obtained the permission of his parents to study abroad." This sentence, uttered by Zhang Youyi many years later, still reveals a touch of helplessness and sadness.Her marriage seemed to be just his burden and task from the beginning.

On August 8, the Nanjing Yuanhang ship left Shanghai Shiliupu Wharf. More than 14 days later, Xu Zhimo became a Chinese student at Clark University in the United States.Xu’s family lived in business. According to Zhimo later, “My father sent me to study abroad because he wanted me to enter the financial industry in the future.” Therefore, at Clark University, he chose to study banking and sociology.

In June 1919, he graduated from Clark University with a first-class honor award, and immediately transferred to Columbia University Graduate School to study for a master's degree in political science.A year later, he received a master's degree in political science from Columbia University with his graduation thesis "On the Status of Women in China".

It is impossible to speculate whether he used Zhang Youyi as a reference for the old-fashioned woman in his writing when writing this thesis.Although his thesis is detailed and detailed, this seemingly sober wise man is practicing the most traditional feudal marriage in China, which is somewhat ironic.

(End of this chapter)