I am not mentally ill, I am the actor with a thousand faces!

Chapter 137, today is another day in good spirits.

"Help me stab that man, and I'll give you this steak."

The superior rich man pointed at an old beggar on the other side.

He looked at the skinny boy jokingly.

Li Yun was a little confused. There was obviously no enmity between me and that person. In fact, he had even pitied himself before and gave me porridge and water.

But the rich man passing by chose this old beggar.

Why did you choose Li Yun to do this?

Because it’s fun.

The young and skinny boy who is about to die explodes into the shape of a beast in order to survive, which is their pleasure in itself.

Would I do this?

Li Yun didn't know.

The feeling of hunger, wounds, and dying has become a bit blurry.

But the desire to survive is still at work.

The rich man gave him a delicate knife.

kill.

can survive.

Give them fun and they'll survive.

I can survive.

The singer's voice still lingers in my ears.

"Ye Tian Hai Ye Tian Hai."

"Tianhai is a city that never sleeps"

Suddenly.

Li Yun woke up again.

Have you woken up?

I remember I was in the Pig Cage Walled City

how

Mottled walls, yellowing lights.

What a shabby place.

Where is this place?

Li Yun opened his eyes and got up again.

I realize that I am no longer the young boy of ‘Fire Cloud Evil God’.

But

Next to it is the mirror.

Look in the mirror.

What is reflected is a small face that looks like Zunlong.

Oh.

It turned out to be me.

here it is.

The dormitory of the orphanage.

The time when ‘Li Yun’ was in the orphanage.

I am Li Yun.

A sideways drift.

In my previous life, I contracted a disease due to careless friendships, traveled to a parallel world, and unfortunately suffered from schizophrenia. I am half worried and half happy about this disease. Although he is annoying most of the time, he can still give me some love occasionally. Some friends who are easy to get along with include Murong Fu and the middle-aged scribe.

There are also disturbing things like the evil young man who is about to become the Fire Cloud Evil God.

but.

‘I’ am Li Yun.

Before 'I' came, he was also 'Li Yun', a man who dreamed of being an actor and almost starved to death in Hengdiao.

Well, this is consistent with me. Everyone is a screw who drifts sideways and drifts north.

What kind of person is he?

correct.

An orphan living in an orphanage.

"So thin." Li Yun lifted up his clothes, next to the mirror of the orphanage.

It turned out to be before Constitution +10.

‘I’ have been so thin since I was a child.

"I'm hungry and want to eat meat."

"I still want to eat meat, so it would be nice if I let you eat."

The nurse in charge of Li Yun threw a big steamed bun to Li Yun.

I don't like steamed buns.

Because when I was a kid, I ate steamed buns every meal.

饿.

Hungry and full.

But Li Yun doesn't hate them.

After all, welfare homes and government agencies would be nice if they kept you alive.

"Your mother left you here."

"My mother. It turns out I have a mother."

Yes, how could I be born without a mother?

Li Yun recalled that song.

【YetianhaiYetianhai.】

哦.

This song.

Mom sang it too.

Mom said.

At that time on campus, when she was playing this song on the radio, he came over to strike up a conversation. ‘You also listen to such an old song? ’

‘Aren’t old songs bad? ’

The figure of the mother is actually very vague.

At least.

For the current Li Yun, when memories and dreams cut across her face, it is a mosaic. She is a very quiet woman who likes to read poetry, read books, and listen to classical music from the last century.

I can only feel the tenderness from a distance. The unfamiliar tenderness.

"mom."

"Where's Dad?"

"I lied to you before, but actually your father is not dead."

"Your father is in the movie business and is a very powerful man."

"Then why doesn't he come to take us back?"

"Our family backgrounds are very different. He can't compete with his parents, so he can only leave us. Don't blame him. He can't help himself."

There was no father's love in the first place, and later my mother died of illness.

‘I’ grew up in an orphanage until I was 18 years old.

I haven't even finished vocational high school, and I've already gone out to work.

Occasionally when I see other people's happy families, I always think that the happiness of parents holding their children's hands and going shopping as a family does not belong to me.

Because mom once said.

My father is in the movie business.

Therefore, ‘I’ also want to work on a TV series.

So, ‘I’ went to Hengcheng.

‘I’ is empty.

The body is empty

The soul is also empty

The future is empty.

But I have my own obsession with acting. Even if I starve to death, I still have to act. I must act.

"Live"

Li Yun inserted the dagger into the beggar's chest.

The old beggar looked at Li Yun calmly. He recognized this little beggar as the one he had given favor to...

People who have shown kindness in the past have finally turned the knife on themselves.

How ironic this is.

It was an ironic thing.

However, the old beggar's eyes were extremely calm.

The feeling of guilt that Li Yungang had just became stronger.

Yes, it’s guilt.

It was obvious that he had saved her, and had given herself a favor, so that she would not die that day yesterday, and that she could live to this day.

But now, in order to survive, he stabbed the knife into his body. He didn't even resist.

Hurry up and scold me.

Hit me quickly.

Come on, tell me I'm nothing, I'm trash.

You can hit me, scold me, insult me, no matter what, because I am just despicable and did such a thing in order to survive.

But the old man in front of him didn't do that.

He just said calmly.

"Live."

at this time.

Li Yun didn't see that the old beggar had any life or hope for the world. He was so calm even when he was killed.

In his eyes.

Li Yun couldn't see any light.

My understanding of this world is dark and gloomy

Feasting and feasting.

Even the matter of 'living' itself does not belong to him.

He is not a person like him.

"Hahahaha! I said he can definitely kill people. If you give them a little benefit to such poor people, they will kill people and set fires for you, hahaha."

"It's better that you understand the poor, Gang Leader Liu."

"Ha ha ha ha."

A piece of beef covered in mud was thrown in front of him.

Stained with black muddy water.

steak.

It smells good.

It smells really good!

Even steak stained with smelly water.

It still smells good.

"Live."

"You are not a child without a mother and father. It's just that your mother can no longer watch you grow up. I'm really sorry."

"In the orphanage, you must listen to your elders and teachers. You must study hard and live well in the future. Even if I am not by your side, I am actually here, just in your memories."

Next to the bed in the ward.

Mother's gentle hands touched Li Yun's face, and the warm feeling became more and more real.

There is also a pungent potion smell, which is also very real.

Quite real.

That feeling appeared very clearly all over Li Yun's body.

‘I’ really want to save my mother.

But ‘I’ was powerless and could only watch this happen.

Her last request was to let herself live.

I have been alone since then.

That feeling of isolation.

It made Li Yun feel uncomfortable, itchy, and even empty.

Empty

The young man naturally joined the gang.

Maybe the 'Axe Gang' or the 'Hammerhead Gang'.

No matter what, in this place, if the poor want to survive, they can only become tools of the rich.

Whether it is providing entertainment.

Or do some dirty things.

But it is still needed.

Like a smelly toad.

Live shamelessly.

Struggling to survive

When the young man was able to stab the old man who helped him with a knife.

He is already 'dead'.

‘I’ dare to fight and fight hard.

Dare to fight with others.

For a steak.

Delicious steak

As long as I kill people.

I can get steak. I can not only eat leftover rice and stinky porridge. I can also eat steak!

I.

I.

As long as I kill people, I hone my killing skills, I kill people, I kill people, I become the ultimate murderer.

I have countless steaks to eat

When Li Yun woke up.

It was already late at night.

"I had a dream"

Dreamed that he became a young fire cloud evil god.

I also dreamed about ‘myself’ when I was a child.

That painful memory made Li Yun burst into tears

but.

quickly

"This kind of pain, this feeling of emptiness is right, yes, if you mix his feelings into the 'Fire Cloud Evil God', I can really feel it."

Li Yun felt that there was something wrong with his brain.

When memories of physical pain surface.

The first reaction was to let him become the nourishment of the ‘Fire Cloud Evil God’.

Let him help you act

But anyway.

Li Yun was trying hard to recall the feeling in the dream just now.

Whether it's a boy in a cannibalistic society.

It’s still the ‘me’ who has no friends and no one to rely on.

Mix them together.

Put them together.

obfuscate

融合

At this moment.

Li Yun felt that his mind was blurry, like paste.

But that feeling also brought an unparalleled, indescribable pleasure.

Keep this painful and fuzzy feeling.

When Li Yun came to Jenny's room on the third floor of the 'Pig Cage Walled City', there was a mirror. It was also the dressing room for the entire crew.

Mirror at 12 o'clock at night

Li Yun looked at himself in the mirror.

Repeatedly said.

"Either I beat the two people here to death, or they beat me to death."

When the 'Fire Cloud Evil God' in those memories was mixed with 'my' pain.

Make a smile that's crazier than painful.

To actually use my own pain and trauma to act out——

I'm probably crazy.

[The host’s mental state today is judged as: Danger! 】

[Does the host need to be temporarily blocked by this system? 】

"Need not."

"That's good."

At this time, Li Yun grabbed the mirror, widened his eyes, and looked at himself in the mirror.