I want to translate your voice

Chapter 24 Who am I in your heart?
After placing Song Yunmu on the hospital bed, Chi Li looked at Shen Qinnian who was present and communicated with the doctor without hesitation: "I am this patient's psychiatrist. She has just taken two inhibitory drugs because of a recurrence of her condition. It's very troublesome." The hospital will pay attention to the medication soon."

The doctor recorded on the board in a formal manner: "Okay, no problem. Please show us the ingredients of the medicine in case we prescribe medicine with conflicting properties."

Chi Li responded and wrote the ingredients of the medicine on the paper according to his memory.The doctor made arrangements and asked the nurse to prepare the suspension bottle.Chi Li turned around to look at Shen Qinnian and signaled to him.The two walked out of the ward together, leaving An Qingqing to take care of Song Yunmu.

The two walked to the hospital balcony in silence. Shen Qinnian was a little irritated, especially when he heard that Chi Li was Song Yunmu's psychiatrist.He dug into his pockets and remembered that he had stopped smoking for a long time.

Chi Li leaned against the low wall with him. Seeing his movements, he took out a cigarette from his pocket and handed it to him, and then lit it for him.He also took a cigarette, and after a while he spoke again.

"I know you."

Nicotine rushes into the nasal cavity, numbing the brain and spitting out the troubles along with the smoke.Shen Qinnian turned his head and glanced at him, while Chi Li said to himself.

"Shen Qinnian, right? I have seen your photos at Song Yunmu's before. I am quite impressed by you. She was originally a patient of my teacher in country A. Of course, as for the disease, it belongs to the patient's privacy. I won’t tell you. If you want to know, let her tell you herself. She decided to return to China a year ago, but she was not recovered at that time and her condition was still unstable. My teacher liked her very much and was worried about her being in China. Neither of us could adapt to the new psychiatrist, so my teacher introduced us to each other half a year ago, and we mostly had video calls before she returned to China."

"It took a long time for me to let her guard down, and she would start chatting with me about her affairs. That's when I also learned your name. Whenever she mentioned your name, her mental state was the worst. OK."

"So I tried to talk to her more about you, and it turned out that the effect was very good. After returning to China, she also mentioned you to me, and her condition became a lot more stable because of you. Patients with mental illness will easily become unstable when they change the environment. It’s very disturbing, although I don’t know why she insists on choosing to come back.”

Chi Li turned his head and looked at Shen Qinnian, his brows furrowed and he blew out another smoke ring.

"Now because of you, she has adapted to the domestic environment again. She has a strange complex about autumn. At this time, she will resist treatment and become very depressed and aggressive. But she has never told me or the teacher about autumn. for what she is. Now back in Watteau, surrounded by people she talks about so often, I thought she would be different this fall. But"

Shen Qinnian suddenly remembered that day Song Yunmu told him that she hated autumn. Her expression at that time seemed somewhat understandable now.

Chi Li considered his words and stated the facts quietly: "But today, she had the idea of ​​committing suicide again."

Shen Qinnian's heart trembled, and he didn't even notice when the cigarette butt burned his fingertips.

Chi Li put out the cigarette and looked at Shen Qinnian with a smile: "Shen Qinnian, do you want to try making her medicine again?"

"This time, heal her completely."

Shen Qinnian sighed and put out the cigarette on his hand, his eyes a little red.

"Ah."

*
When Song Yunmu woke up again, Shen Qinnian was the only one left beside him, and he felt a little dry.Shen Qinnian, who was reading documents on his mobile phone next to him, noticed that she had woken up. He quickly poured a glass of warm water, helped her adjust her posture and handed the water glass to her, without having to meet her in advance.But Song Yunmu felt inexplicably guilty, so he rubbed the tip of his nose and drank water while peeking at him.

Shen Qinnian raised his hand and tapped her forehead: "Pay attention, don't choke."

Song Yunmu pouted and put down the cup. Seeing his tired face, he cautiously said, "Have you not gone to work all day?"

"Where should I go if you're like this?" Shen Qinnian's tone was very calm and matter-of-fact.

"I" Song Yunmu was about to speak.

He interrupted me again.

This time Shen Qinnian looked at her, with more emotion in his eyes and a heavier tone: "Are you going to say that you are okay again? When will you be willing to tell me that you are okay? Who am I in your eyes? "

Song Yunmu was silent. He was probably still ill and his mental state was relatively fragile. At this time, he looked at him with red eyes and aggrieved: "That's not what I meant. I just don't want you to worry." Shen Qinnian was almost softened by Song Yunmu's eyes. , and then thought of the fragile Song Yunmu in his arms in the morning, he persisted and said with a cold face: "You will only make me worry if you don't tell me, do you understand."

He sighed again and looked directly into hers: "Song Yunmu, answer me. Who do I mean to you?"

Song Yunmu's eyes were red, and for some reason she seemed to be back in the taxi returning to the dormitory at the airport in Country A that summer.The fingertips were pulled into the sheets, and they turned white from exerting force, while the hand holding the sling bottle showed signs of blood flowing back.

Shen Qinnian suddenly held her hand, looked at the blood on the infusion tube, stood up and pressed the call bell.

And at this moment, Song Yunmu returned to this morning from that summer.

She feels that she is a flawed person. She has been working hard since she was a child, but she is still shrouded in the light of her sister and has been in the shadow for a long time.

She ignored that she could shine, and her low self-esteem made her anxious over time. She always had the illusion that she was inferior, so she used all her efforts to prove herself, and then fell into a vicious circle of low self-esteem, getting deeper and deeper. .

But Shen Qinnian was so dazzling in her eyes, and she didn't have the courage, just like a few years ago.

"Friends?"

Shen Qinnian was stunned. The nurse at the door heard the sound and came in to help Song Yunmu handle the infusion.

Shen Qinnian looked at Song Yunmu through the nurse and suddenly sneered at himself.

She found an opportunity to shrink back into the hole again.

Shen Qinnian felt that his strategy of boiling frogs in warm water should change.

If this continues, if Song Yunmu gets the idea to run away again, he will lose money.

After the nurse took care of it and saw that the hanging bottles were also hung up, she took the needle and said, "It's almost done. The patient can be discharged. Please pay more attention to rest when you go back and don't be too tired."

Song Yunmu thanked the nurse and saw Shen Qinnian taking the suit jacket from the sofa.He came over again and wrapped her body with a blanket: "Let's go home."

Song Yunmu pursed his lips and felt a little uneasy. He hesitated to speak, but in the end he obeyed.

Back home, Shen Qinnian asked the housekeeper to deliver dinner in advance.Shen Qinnian didn't calm down and sent her to the door of his house. He forcefully demanded that she finish the meal and remember to take medicine before leaving.

Song Yunmu stood at the door of his house, looking at him like a child who had done something wrong and turned around before entering the house.

Shen Qinnian suddenly remembered something and turned around to look at her flatly.

"Song Yunmu, I have never regarded you as a friend."

After saying this, he pushed open the door and entered the house, reluctantly leaving her alone.

　We, Mu Bao, all have problems with her original family. Let’s wait for her to come out.

　　
　
(End of this chapter)