see you in spring

Chapter 186 Desire for Survival Three

Sun Yan uses her computer and mobile phone to browse recruitment software every day.

From the time she decided to re-enter the workplace until now, she has submitted no less than 600 resumes, but the response rate is less than one-third.

At first, because she had been away from the workplace for too long and was anxious to return to her original job, her qualifications were too far apart, so the resume she submitted repeatedly hit the wall.Later, in order to make a quick living after the divorce, she expanded her scope. From her previous job in foreign trade to online course teacher, assistant, etc., she submitted her resume to all. Unfortunately, the situation this year was too special, with a large group of college graduates with unlimited energy and very little basic salary. She has never been able to find a job in her life, and as a housewife, she has no competitiveness.

Now that Liu Quantao has lost her job, it is already good for her to find a job that can make a living.She works hard every day, no matter what job it is, even manual jobs like supermarket cashier.In today's situation, as long as it can give her an income, as long as it is legal, she is willing to do any job.

But her strategy of finding a needle in a haystack has no effect at all in this special period.After working hard for a while, she accidentally saw other people's job hunting strategies on the Internet and finally got the idea.She wants to divide the jobs she wants to submit resumes into into several levels: those with experience and ability.Inexperienced but capable.She has no experience, but as long as she is given a chance, she will be able to do it after studying hard.

For these three categories, she revised several versions of her resume. After re-submitting, the responses came more slowly.But because of her six-year hiatus and the mismatch of majors, only a few people were interviewed over the phone, and none of them passed.

At this time, Liu Quantao, since he told her that he wanted a divorce, was like a walking zombie, with no energy left.Apart from getting up to go to the bathroom and occasionally eating something, he hardly communicates with her and the child.

Whenever the child called him dad, he wanted to respond in his heart, but there was no expression on his stiff face, and he could only utter low, monotonous syllables.

He knew there was something wrong with his mind.When he was discharged from the hospital, his attending physician told him that cured patients like him would develop psychological problems for various reasons after reintegrating into society.If a problem arises, don't avoid it and seek intervention from a psychologist as soon as possible.

But now, he doesn't want to find a psychiatrist at all.Because those patients who had been treated in the hospital with him were lucky enough to escape the attack of the virus and return to their families.Just like him, there were more or less problems.

They were all out of touch with their old social circles.The only people they can talk to now are these patients who were infected together.Excluded from society, they can only hug each other in the patient group for warmth, comfort, or cry.

Liu Quantao felt that this could not be solved by a few words of encouragement and comfort from a psychiatrist.

He knew that Sun Yan and his children, as well as his biological mother and biological brother, all had kindness and love for him.But the pain is his own, and those closest to him have no obligation to bear it for him.

Before, he was angry at the people around him for ostracizing and isolating him, but now he has figured it out.

Everyone around him is worried that he may be infected with the virus. He has been infected. Even if all indicators are normal now, he should not pose a potential danger to the people around him.

He wrapped and sealed himself like a silkworm chrysalis.Isolation goes both ways.

The two children were afraid of such a father, seeing him shutting himself in the room all day long, they no longer dared to disturb him.

Liu Quantao allowed himself to adapt to his children's alienation and prepare for his departure.

Even if you don't want to give up, you still have to leave.He worried that if he stayed any longer, he would infect his children.This contagion refers not only to the germs on the body, but also to his bad luck.Anyone who comes into contact with him will be rejected.He would rather stay away from them than see his children and wife being rejected by others.

Of course, Sun Yan also noticed Liu Quantao's act of isolating herself. Now that the whole family is counting on her, she can only look for a job in a desperate situation, and pull Liu Quantao up when she has nothing to do, so that he can express and vent his emotions appropriately, and keep Communicate with the outside world and participate in the family.

Naturally, he was uncooperative. Sun Yan could only divert his attention appropriately after taking care of the children, so that he would not always focus on unemployment, online violence and rejection.After the child goes to bed, she will go to his room and play him new movies on her mobile phone, or classic TV series or even popular games that they both liked.But after her passionate devotion, she found that either his eyes were dull or he had already closed his eyes.

She encouraged herself and him, telling him not to care what those keyboard warriors said. His closest family members were caring about him and accepting him, so he should cheer up instead of worrying about irrelevant people. Sad and sad.

The painstaking efforts still had little effect, Liu Quantao was still depressed, unable to adjust his diet and sleep, no matter how strong Ren Sunyan was, facing the current situation, she could no longer be calm.

She once told herself that no matter how difficult it was, she would help him get out of it.But in reality, under the weight of financial pressure and family pressure, Sun Yan really couldn't hold on anymore.

On a night when Liu Quantao didn't leave her room for the whole day again, she called Jia Lie and Guyu while holding back tears.

The three of them were video chatting in the group. Looking at Sun Yan's appearance, Jia Lie felt that she was even more haggard than Gu Yu, who was in the hospital.

"Listening to what you said, could Liu Quantao be suffering from depression?" Jia Lie said.

Sun Yan sniffed: "I don't know if he is depressed now. I only know that if he continues to be like this, I will be depressed."

"I wonder if I will become like this in the future." Gu Yu murmured.

Jia Lie shook his head and analyzed: "You are different from him. From the fact that he feels that he should have the say in the family to make money to support his family, it can be seen that in his perception, as a "man" who conforms to social norms, he must Earn money to support the family and fulfill responsibilities to the family. If he cannot do it to benefit the family, he will think of himself as a loser and a soft-boiled person. This will make him feel humiliated. From his perspective, this may be worse than being infected or being infected. Internet violence is even more serious. After this series of blows, unemployment and no longer being able to find a job are the last straw that defeat him."

Sun Yan also agreed with Jia Lie's analysis, she said exhausted physically and mentally: "No matter how much I encourage him now, he can't cheer up. I guess I can only find him another job to cheer him up again, but How easy is that?"

Jia Lie and Gu Yu looked at her. Sun Yan was already thin. She must have worked too hard during this period, and the veins on her forehead were looming.Coupled with the messy hair that she didn't care to take care of, there is a sense of hardship that makes people know that her life is not going well.

Gu Yu, who had been silent for several seconds, suddenly felt distressed and said: "Since he wants to leave so much, then you can leave. Anyway, it's the same now with him or without him. You are even more tired with him. Look at what you have endured now." .”

Sun Yan burst into tears immediately.Why didn't she want to escape from her current life? Liu Quantao, who had no desire to live, and his lifeless home were like a man-eating swamp, holding her tightly. Even though there was a shore next to it, she couldn't climb out no matter how hard she tried.

Jia Lie was silent. She didn't want to see Sun Yan suffer so much now, nor did she want her to suffer the pain of divorce.But no matter what choice she made, it would be painful, and she couldn't help her make the choice.

(End of this chapter)