Chapter 163

Bai Jingxuan once had a dream.

When her thinking was still ignorant and her family was happy, she dreamed of becoming a music artist.

Although her childhood memories are somewhat blurred, Bai Jingxuan can vaguely remember that she once owned a music box when she was young.It seems to be the music box given to her by her parents. Whenever she is in pain, the soothing and light music of the music box will liberate her from the pain.

Although she can only recall intermittent melodies today, it does not prevent her from having a good impression of music.

But later, her parents died due to the attack of the beast, and Bai Jingxuan was sent to the orphanage.The music box in memory was also lost in the accident, and never appeared in Bai Jingxuan's life again.

The orphanage wasn't that bad, but it wasn't capable of helping her find her lost things either.Even if a nurse gave her another one according to her description, it was a different thing after all, and it no longer had the effect of soothing the pain.Her dream has thus become a dusty memory.

Perhaps, it is not just a dream.From a certain point in time that Bai Jingxuan didn't even notice, she lost her "desire".

Feelings of joy and anger have lost their coordinates, and the concept of good and evil has no scale.I don't know why I am happy, I don't know why I am sad, I can only observe the words and expressions, and follow the emotions expressed by others.

She is well-behaved because she has nothing to resist; she is quiet because she has no personal needs.Like a doll without self-consciousness, it seems to imitate the human form, but there is nothing inside.

There was once a child of the same age, Tong Yan Wuji, who used words like "empty shell" to describe her.However, even if she is called like this, Bai Jingxuan is still ignorant of it.

Why would I be an "empty shell"?She doesn't understand.

But she really didn't know what she wanted, a blank desire, a blank emotion.There is even nothing that can rivet her in a direction, allowing her to find her own existence.

She is like a ship lost in the deep sea, looking around the vast ocean, no matter which direction you can see the slightest difference.It's just that the ship she drives is called "Ego" and the surrounding ocean is called "Life".

Do you want money yourself?Or do you want fame and fortune?Do you want to be a doctor?Or do you want to be a teacher?
She kept asking and observing other people's dreams.Then take these dreams over and put them on yourself.Just like a customer who keeps trying on clothes in a clothing store, because he doesn't know what he wants, he has the momentum to wear all the clothes in the store, intending to find the one that suits him.

This confusion lasted until several months ago, until the moment when the orphanage was attacked and Mo Ke appeared in front of her.

Will "Magic Girl" be the direction I want to look for, will it be the dress I want?As a magical girl, can I get back my forgotten emotions and my lost desires?
Bai Jingxuan didn't know the answer.

But whenever she recalled the scene where she was saved by Sakura, she would still feel longing and throbbing in her heart, and would feel grateful and grateful.The feelings at that time seem so vivid now, which made her find the feeling of "alive" after a long absence.

——"So, I told myself that I want to become a magical girl like Sakura-senpai."

Walking slowly on the streets of Li Xing District, Bai Jingxuan said softly: "At least I was really moved and grateful for such behavior in the past. Such emotions are not fake."

"……I see."

Tian Sheng walked beside her side by side, and listened to Bai Jingxuan's story with a solemn expression: "Although I still can't recall the details, but at that time, when you were in the orphanage, that's why you became a magical girl, yes Bar?"

"En." Bai Jingxuan nodded.

The time is in the morning, and the location is near the "Lakeside Spring" community in Lixing District.Three weeks after the Full Moon Festival incident, the Different Strategy Bureau approved the third team's request to search the residential area, allowing them to go to "Lakeside Spring" to search for traces of Black Ember Dawn.

On the way to Lakeside Spring, the third team bumped into Bai Jingxuan who was patrolling here, and then, there was a little tail behind their team.

As the captain, Li Yingwei repeatedly tried to persuade him, but with little success.The other team members didn't know how to persuade a magical girl, so this troublesome task finally fell on Tian Sheng.

This is a pain for Tian Sheng.

Because he didn't know how to communicate with Bai Jingxuan.

Although he used to be a nurse at the orphanage and knew Bai Jingxuan, it was impossible for a male nurse to take care of a girl's life, so he didn't know her very well.

He just likes Bai Jingxuan because he is cute and sensible, and he usually chats with her.But considering that a child living in an orphanage probably doesn't want to bring up the past, the content of the chat between the two is also the clear soup and little water in daily life, and they don't deliberately touch on deeper things.

If Bai Jingxuan hadn't been very active and willing to tell him the story of her past, he might not know what to say now.

"However, the senior you mentioned, she has... passed away."

He tried his best to organize his words, avoiding to touch the scars of the other party: "Black Ember Dawn is probably the murderer, that's why you hate them so much and want to arrest them, right?"

"It's abuse..."

Bai Jingxuan spoke solemnly, but in the middle of the sentence, she probably remembered something, lowered her gaze, and changed her words silently, "I want to punish them."

"Did you want to say that word again just now?"

Tian Sheng scratched his head helplessly: "I don't understand, is this what you called 'Senior Sakura'?"

"No, that's what a teacher does."

Bai Jingxuan raised her hand and clenched her fist: "But the teacher is Senior Sakura's teammate, and she did it for Senior Sakura. I think that's right, that's cool!"

"Even if that could be wrong?"

"It must be right?" Bai Jingxuan tilted her head.

"...that's what she said, Chief."

Sighing, Tian Sheng took out the phone from the pocket on the other side, and put it next to his ear: "You heard it too, these are her reasons, I really can't persuade her."

After saying this, he remained silent, listening to the voice on the other side of the phone, and nodding from time to time.

Then, he handed the phone to Bai Jingxuan, ignored Bai Jingxuan's astonished, aggrieved gaze as if looking at a traitor, turned his gaze sideways, scratched his cheek and said:
"Xiaoxuan, the director asked you to answer the phone."

Bai Jingxuan, who seemed to be fearless before, and who was talking at length, suddenly picked up the phone like a primary school student who did something wrong.

Then, she glanced at Tian Sheng again with a heartbreaking gaze like seeing a traitor, and she answered the phone:

"Hey, dad...uncle."

 2k, touch day.

  Thanks to the uncle who sells pies, the leader of Aitna Yinyue for the rewards, and the book friends Yue Youmeng, Insomnia Sweet Potato, and the rudder to the west of Mujiang for the rewards, and thanks to all the book friends for their support.

  
 
(End of this chapter)

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