proud of marriage

Chapter 334 Pisces 018: He is the culprit
Shang Yu took her mobile phone and pushed it in front of her, "I guess you will look for the mobile phone, it has just been fully charged."

"Okay, thank you." Pei Tingyu's mouth was full of food, and he mumbled indistinctly in response, not forgetting to praise, "You have mastered all kinds of cuisines, delicious."

Shang Yu poured her another glass of juice, "Eat slowly, no one will grab you."

After eating, Pei Tingyu helped him put away the bowl, and then nestled on the sofa in the living room with his mobile phone in his arms.

In the group, Ai Zuli and Bai Junhua: [@小富娘@白姓美女姐姐姐, are you there?My little sister has a question. 】

Bai Junhua happened to be resting today, and she was also lying dead at home, so she responded quickly: [?Tell me, my sister will show you the way. 】

Xu Li went to take a nap and didn't come back so fast.

Pei Tingyu thought about it for a while before starting to type: [It's just... I'm a little confused now, should I tell Shang Yu about my miscarriage. 】

The beauty surnamed Bai: [You two reconciled? 】

Pei Tingyu: [Not really, but it's much better than the previous relationship. 】

The beauty surnamed Bai: [That's ambiguous. 】

Seeing Bai Junhua's precise words, Pei Tingyu didn't deny it: 【Then should I say it?How should I say it? 】

The beauty surnamed Bai: [Then what are you thinking in your heart now?Do you want to make up?If you want to reconcile, then say, after all, this is a gap between the two of you, and if you want to erase this gap, you have to speak up and solve it together. 】

[If you don't plan to get back together with him, then there's no need to say anything, they're all strangers anyway.However, you don’t intend to become a stranger with him now. Since you can’t let go, try again, but this time, don’t chase him foolishly. It’s time to switch roles and let him chase you run, you know? 】

【Perhaps he will feel guilty and blame himself after knowing this matter, but it is not certain how long this kind of thing can last. After all, most men are... Well, you understand. 】

Pei Tingyu: [He is not that kind of person. 】

The beauty surnamed Bai: [Look, the answer is ready to come out, since you want to get back together, then find a time to sit down and chat with him. 】

[Let me tell you first, Pei Tingyu, if you fall in love again now, when you return to China, my mother will give you two big sinuses, useless things! 】

Pei Tingyu: [I don't have a love brain, I'm very rational now. 】

The beauty surnamed Bai: [Looking at the question you asked, I don't see where your rationality is, maybe you are feeding the dog. 】

Pei Tingyu: [! ! ! 】

The beauty surnamed Bai: [How does Shang Yu treat you now?What is the attitude? 】

Pei Tingyu: [ She was chasing me, and even deliberately let go of her work to chase me, moved across from me, picked me up from school, and cooked for me. 】

Bai Junhua sent a frowning and indescribable emoji.

Another string of texts was sent: [You guys are starting to live as a couple before you agree? 6. Then why ask, just confess, and then get the certificate, you are not married, it is really difficult to end, otherwise I despise you, and I despise Shang Yu even more. 】

Pei Tingyu smacked his lips and sent a series of ellipses.

He began to think deeply about Bai Junhua's words.

Although she and Shang Yu have not directly revealed that relationship now, they are actually almost a couple.

That confession is also inevitable.

She thought about it for a long time, and after about an hour, she asked again in the group: [How should I mention it?Would it be too abrupt to mention it suddenly?How can I ask, I can’t just say, after you left on my birthday, I must have had a miscarriage, it’s too imprecise. 】

Bai Junhua on the other end of the phone twitched the corner of her mouth when she saw her question.

Has this girl suffered from cerebral thrombosis for ten years?
She was so angry that she called a phone call, and as soon as she picked it up, she said directly, "Pei Tingyu, are you out of your mind? How can you say this kind of thing, of course you can say it with your mouth. Besides, what's wrong with you?" I'm ashamed to say, this matter was originally his responsibility, what's your trouble?"

"Besides, as a man, Shang Yu is his responsibility, so I don't know what he's talking about."

"Ah, ah, sister Junhua, what are you talking about, hehehehe."

Seeing Shang Yu approaching, Pei Tingyu panicked, and hurriedly wanted to interrupt Bai Junhua.

Bai Junhua frowned, narrowed her eyes, curled her lips, and pretended to be annoyed, "You're afraid it's a ten-year cerebral thrombosis. What did you ask yourself that you don't know? It's because of your miscarriage."

"..."

The other end of the phone suddenly fell silent, and Bai Junhua raised her eyebrows, hating that the iron could not be broken, "Since you want to start over with him, you have to talk about some things. Only by getting rid of this knot in your heart can you be more serious." Okay, keep going, otherwise you won't go far, presumably, you don't want to separate and reunite, it will consume each other's feelings too much, and it is unnecessary."

"Think about it for yourself, you'd better think clearly, and stop asking that kind of brain damage question, OK?"

After saying this, he hung up the phone directly.

Pei Tingyu blinked his eyes, and slowly changed his head, and saw Shang Yu standing in front of the coffee table, staring at her with a pair of dark eyes, his face was so calm that no one could see any emotions of joy or anger.

Without the gentleness and warmth of the past, this kind of Shang Yu was something she had never seen before.

Inexplicably, she felt a little flustered.

But thinking about what Bai Junhua said just now, it is true that this matter is not entirely her responsibility, and Shang Yu is also responsible for half of it, and even more.

Thinking of this, she felt relieved a lot, as if there was a fire burning in her heart, which made her feel lost.

Perhaps, now is a good opportunity.

Saying it through Bai Junhua's mouth would save her from worrying so much.

"Shang Yu." She took a deep breath, pursed her lips, and called out.

"What do you mean by miscarriage?" It took Shang Yu a long time to recover his voice, his throat was a little rough, and his voice was particularly low and hoarse, with a quiver at the end, and then disappeared automatically.

Pei Tingyu also heard the change in his voice, opened his lips, took a sip of the Coke on the table, "Sit down, I happen to have something to tell you."

Shang Yu only felt tightness in his chest, and a sense of powerlessness was pulling his heart deeply, gnawing at his soul.

Very painful, very suffocating.

He was sitting beside her, it was obviously autumn, and it was a slightly cool season, but at this moment his back and the palms of his hands were covered with a thin layer of cold sweat.

For some reason, Pei Tingyu's mood was even more tense and heavy than his.

When it was time to face it, the complexity in my heart was particularly hard to describe.

"Do you still remember that after my birthday, I disappeared for a few days?" After a long silence, she smiled softly, as if mocking, "I think, at that time, you must have thought that I was angry, Losing your temper, playing disappearance on purpose, right?"

Shang Yu parted his lips, but did not speak, the gloomy look in his eyes was getting thicker and thicker.

"Actually not." Pei Tingyu put the cup back, wanting to put on a very relaxed attitude, but he just couldn't let go, and the smile on the corner of his mouth couldn't be pulled away no matter what.

"After you were called away by the phone, I was very unhappy. I couldn't get out of my heart, so I went to the bar to drink by myself, but I drank too much. When I went back... I accidentally fell down the stairs."

Shang Yu's pupils trembled, his heart tightened, and he looked at her.

Her dark eyes reflected her delicate face without any modification.

She smiled slightly, "Actually, it's nothing, just a slight concussion, a little bruising on the arms and legs, and then... a miscarriage."

She said the latter sentence very softly, almost without a sound.

But the room was too quiet, and it easily drifted into his ears.

At that moment, Shang Yu only felt that his heart seemed to have stopped beating, followed by severe pain that gradually spread throughout his body.

Perhaps because of the pain and grievances accumulated for so long, when this matter was mentioned, Pei Tingyu's eyes were still red, tears fell, and his voice choked up.

"At that time... I didn't know that I was pregnant. If I knew, I wouldn't drink, no matter how sad or unhappy I would be..."

After knowing that she was pregnant and had a miscarriage, she didn't cry or make a fuss, she just lay blankly on the bed and looked at the ceiling all day.

I can't sleep, and I don't want to eat.

Just close your eyes, or in a dream, there will be a child shouting at her, 'Mom, mother, why don't you want me?Why abandon me? ', as long as she falls asleep, she will wake up from the nightmare.

That period of time, to her, was the darkest and most painful moment in her entire life.

During the few days when she was hospitalized, she thought a lot about her relationship with Shang Yu and her past. In the end, she felt that the best result was to let go.

It is also liberation.

Let go of that Shang Yu who doesn't love him, and let go of this self who is so obsessed with love that he keeps bumping against the south wall and refuses to look back.

She is tired.

She didn't want to continue anymore, she didn't want to run after anyone else, she wanted to be herself, the carefree little princess of the Pei family.

When she made the decision to let go, her heart felt unprecedentedly relaxed, and all the negative emotions accumulated in her heart disappeared.

That's why she was able to be so calm on the day she broke up with Shang Yu.

It was she who convinced herself that it was useless to force what was not her own.

He also considered himself more important than Shang Yu.

When Shang Yu was not so important, his emotions had nothing to do with her.

It's just that his current pursuit is beyond her expectations.

She originally thought that from then on, they would be strangers in the future, and even if they met in the future due to force majeure, they would not have too many intersections.

She also didn't want to have anything to do with him again.

She used to think that Shang Yu was good at everything, very gentle, patient, rich and beautiful, but he just didn't like her enough.

There was nothing wrong with it, so she didn't blame him for anything, but felt that her self-righteous joy was in vain.

But after getting along with each other these days, she also felt that Shang Yu had her in his heart, which made her slowly let go of the defense and pain in her heart.

In fact, to put it bluntly, the scars are a little healed and the pain is forgotten.

At least, that's how she scolded herself.But after all, he couldn't squeeze his own heart.

Her heart was as early as more than ten years ago, and she chose him at the age when she first fell in love, and it will be difficult to change it in this life.

Shang Yu never expected this to be the truth, his heart throbbed fiercely, and when he saw Pei Tingyu who was crying, he hugged her into his arms without hesitation.

Very tight, very tight.

I can't wait to rub her into my flesh and blood, and apologize in a low voice, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's my fault, it's my fault..."

With his comfort, it seems to have confidence.

The tears seemed more like a bank burst, they couldn't stop falling down, the more I cried, the words couldn't be clearer, and I faltered intermittently.

"During that time, I was really sad, sad, or...blaming myself. If I...be more cautious, this kind of thing won't happen. It...I...don't dare to sleep every day. Sleeping is a nightmare, it says it blames me, hates me, says I don't like it, it's not like that, it's not like that..."

But Shang Yu knows everything.

He kissed her on the cheek, then to the eyes, nose, lips...

"I know, I know." He trembled at the end, his eyes were slightly red, "It's my fault, it's my fault, I'm sorry... I made you suffer so much, for so long..."

Just thinking about the situation at that time, he seemed to be swallowed by guilt and self-blame, unable to breathe.

She was in so much pain at that time.

That's why I want to escape from myself without hesitation, and make a clean break with myself.

Because of the crying, Pei Tingyu couldn't say anything, and she cried more fiercely than the previous few times.

There is also a sense of relief that there are no secrets between them.

Shang Yu comforted her for a long time, until she was tired from crying and her heart ached, Pei Tingyu stopped crying and fell asleep in his arms.

He gently caressed her face, lowered his head and kissed from her forehead to her lips.

As if kissing was not enough, we kissed for a long time like this.

After she fell asleep, he carefully picked her up by the waist, went to the room, gently put her on the bed, and covered her with a quilt.

When the bed lost a sense of gravity, Pei Tingyu suddenly opened his eyes, and grabbed his arm, his scarlet eye sockets were slightly swollen, his crying voice was a little hoarse, and he looked particularly aggrieved and vivid.

"Don't go, I'm afraid..."

For more than a year, she still had that nightmare occasionally, but it was indeed a while since the last nightmare.

Maybe it was because of crying and complaining today, she was also in a heavy heart, and her intuition told her that the nightmare would come again.

It's not that I'm afraid of that child, but that I'm afraid of being wrapped up in guilt and self-blame, feeling helpless and lonely.

"I won't leave, I'll stay here with you." Shang Yu sat on the edge of the bed and said softly, "Go to sleep, good boy."

With his words, Pei Tingyu closed his eyes again in peace, but did not let go of the hand holding his arm.

Shang Yu took her hand and wrapped it tightly in his palm.

She should have been carefree, but it was all because of herself that she endured these things that she shouldn't have to bear.

He is the culprit.

The emotions derived from the bottom of my heart include not only guilt and self-blame, but also remorse.

　Pisces’ episode is almost coming to an end, there are probably one or two chapters left, it’s the end of the month, please vote, thank you, thank you
　　
　
(End of this chapter)