Entertainment: The opening and the official announcement of the national goddess

Chapter 901 Funny sketch, beware of white clouds drifting away
Zhang Xiao said bluntly: "I'll just touch the pillow, whirring."

Song Yan said: "People who are heartless and heartless sleep with high quality."

Cui Yu said: "Yeah, only narrow-minded people like me can't sleep."

Song Yan quickly explained: "I didn't mention you."

Cui Yu said: "Uncle, are you happy this year?"

Without even thinking about it, Zhang Xiao grinned and said with a big smile: "Happy, I sing Errenzhuan every day, with a dozen or so old women..."

Before he finished speaking, he immediately closed his mouth after seeing Song Yan's eyes.

Song Yan explained: "He works on his folk art, and I organize my publications. We care about each other in life and help each other in career. How can I describe it to you?"

Zhang Xiao said, "I've made do with it, how far can I go?"

When Song Yan heard this, she almost died of anger.

Cui Yu smiled and said, "Actually, I've heard that uncle and aunt have some emotional problems."

Song Yan immediately said: "Scandal, absolute atmosphere, a star without scandal is not a celebrity, it is difficult to be a man, and it is even more difficult to be a woman."

Zhang Xiao said again: "Being an old woman...is difficult."

"Hahahaha!" The audience couldn't stop laughing.

The cooperation between Zhang Xiao and Song Yan can be said to have reached its peak in seconds.

Cui Yudao: "Everyone has seen it, this uncle has a big stomach and can't tell the truth. Fortunately, I have prepared a trick."

"Let's change the way, uncle and aunt. When I ask the uncle, the aunt puts on the earphones. When I ask the aunt, the uncle puts on the earphones, listens to music, and relaxes."

Song Yan said: "Give him a buckle first."

Cui Yu immediately put the earphones on Zhang Xiao's ears.

Zhang Xiao quickly took it off and said, "Oh, it's too loud."

Song Yan said impatiently: "If you tell you to buckle it up, you do it, why are you talking so much nonsense, heh heh, just ask, Xiao Cui."

Cui Yudao: "Auntie, how did you come to our Sunny TV station this time?"

"We..." Song Yan hesitated for a moment, and said, "We came here by special plane."

Cui Yu said, "That's too expensive, we can't afford it."

Song Yan laughed and said, "You don't need to report it, it's all small money. Now that you have money, look at this dress, it's quite rich. Hey, it's too rich."

Cui Yu saw Song Yan fiddling with her clothes, and asked, "Is this mink fur?"

Song Yan corrected: "Wrong, this is mink."

"It's very expensive, isn't it?"

"Not expensive, forty thousand."

"[-] is not expensive, aunt is really willing to spend money for herself.":
"Women, you have to be tough on yourself."

"Pfft!"

"Hahaha!"

The audience burst into laughter, is it okay to be tough on yourself?
Afterwards, Cui Yu asked Zhang Xiao again: "Uncle, I heard that you came to the TV station by special plane?"

"Ah, they came here by tractor."

"How cold that is!"

"It's a lot of clothes, it's all windy, look at her clothes."

"Auntie, these clothes are quite expensive, aren't they?"

"It's too expensive, rent for 41 days!"

"rental?"

Seeing Zhang Xiao uncovering Song Yan's secrets one by one, the audience at the scene immediately burst into laughter.

"Can't stand it. It's too funny."

"Teacher Song Yan is so pitiful."

"Is this the dismantling expert?"

Cui Yu said: "How is it? Is it effective? You have to ask, ah, let's ask aunt again, listen to the music."

Song Yan took off the earphones and said, "Why are you laughing all over the place? I think there's something wrong here. Look at me and make some gestures."

"Understood." Zhang Xiao nodded.

Song Yan said: "Xiao Cui, you can ask."

"Auntie, let's talk about your book."

"Book?"

"Ok!"

Song Yan spread her arms and said, "Where does this start?"

Cui Yudao: "Let's start with the book signing!"

"Book signing?" Song Yan stood up, gestured, and said, "On the day of book signing, that guy, that scene was quite spectacular. It pushed me under the table, and the pile of books fell over."

Cui Yu said, "Oh, then I'll ask uncle again."

"Okay." Song Yan nodded, and then said to Zhang Xiao, "Ask you, my book...book."

Zhang Xiao nodded and gave her a reassuring look.

Cui Yu asked, "Uncle, you were there on the day when Auntie signed the book sale, right?"

Zhang Xiaodao: "I didn't sign to accept the book!"

"No?" Cui Yu asked.

Seeing Song Yan next to him make a gesture of spreading her hands, Zhang Xiao hurriedly said, "It's all free!"

Song Yan thought that Zhang Xiao was right, and a bright smile appeared on her face.

Cui Yu said: "Then, just now Auntie said that there are huge crowds."

Song Yan, a scholar of Zhang Xiao, said while gesturing: "Oh my god, when I heard that it was given away for nothing, the whole town went to collect it, and when I went back, it was all plastered on the walls. That guy is on the left floor and the right floor. One floor to the right and one floor to the left, and then I went to the toilet to see that there was still such a thick pile of books there."

After Zhang Xiao finished speaking, he clapped hands with Song Yan to celebrate.

Netizens in the webcast room were already laughing like crazy.

"Oh, I'm going, I'm laughing to death."

"It's a top-notch performance."

"I just took a sip of water and sprayed it out."

"Xiao Shen and Teacher Song's performances are really amazing."

"nice."

"···"

At the scene, Cui Yu looked at Song Yan and said, "Auntie, give me the earphones."

Song Yan gave Zhang Xiao a thumbs up and said, "IQ is quite high."

"It's all right." Zhang Xiao said with a smile.

Cui Yudao: "That's what happened. Just now, I asked Uncle and Aunt the same question, but you both answered..."

"It's a little different. I'll put on my headphones and listen to music, and you'll be able to match a pair of words."

Hearing this, Song Yan's expression changed greatly, and she said, "No, why, what did you say, how did we get here?"

"Come here by tractor."

"Where are my clothes?"

"Rent for 41 days."

"Where's my book?"

"I followed your gestures. Didn't you say it was all glued to the wall? In the end, there were books and so on in the toilet!"

Song Yan pushed him angrily, and said, "I told you not to let you tell the truth, why can't you remember?"

Zhang Xiao said with a wry smile: "Then you can't help it, he's choked up with that thing, this kid has failed his studies, I'll tell him to go, Xiao Cui!"

Cui Yu hurriedly took it off.

Zhang Xiao said: "You put on the earphones."

Cui Yu was taken aback for a moment, then hurriedly brought his son up again.

Zhang Xiao gave a thumbs up, and said: "Xiao Cui, you have learned it badly, you, your trick is too dark, you can't sleep because you have too many thoughts, you should!"

Cui Yu replied with a confused face: "Ah, thank you!"

"Pfft!"

"Hahahaha!"

The scene burst into laughter again.

Song Yan said: "The hosts are all like this, let's say it, from now on you are not allowed to say a word, you are not allowed to say a word, do you hear, remember, talk?"

Zhang Xiao retorted: "Didn't you not let me speak?"

Song Yan pointed at Zhang Xiao angrily, and said, "It's really difficult to cooperate with you. You said, I have never had a tacit understanding in this life. Cui, take it."

Cui Yu took off the earphones and said, "Okay, then I'll ask Uncle another question."

When Zhang Xiao heard this, he quickly signaled to him that he could not speak.

Song Yan looked at him, Zhang Xiao quickly covered his mouth.

Cui Yu said, "What's the matter, uncle?"

"Ah, he has a stomachache."

After Song Yan finished answering, she looked at Zhang Xiao and said, "You said your stomach hurts."

Zhang Xiao quickly covered his stomach.

Cui Yu was immediately amused, and said: "Aha, aunt, your family education is really strict. Wherever you make uncle hurt, he will hurt wherever he hurts."

Song Yan laughed and said, "No, he's not feeling well, why don't you ask me?"

Cui Yudao: "I read your book just now. The first one is "Going Home". It's about the last time the program was held in Tieling. The scene was very spectacular, right?"

Song Yan boasted: "How can it be called particularly spectacular? It should be quite spectacular. That guy, that scene, that is really, the sound of gongs and drums, the sound of firecrackers, the sea of ​​people, that...!"

Zhang Xiao couldn't listen anymore, and said: "Xiao Cui, I beg you, please put this thing on for me."

As he spoke, he put on his earphones.

Song Yan took off his earphones and said, "What I said is all false, right?"

"Really?"

"You can't take it anymore, can you?"

"I can keep listening!"

"Then what are you holding it for?"

"Stomach pain."

"Why is it so annoying? You say, Cui, you keep asking, ignore him, he has never seen the world."

Cui Yu smiled and said, "I know, actually, after becoming a celebrity, Auntie has seen a lot of the world and participated in a lot of activities, right?"

Song Yan boasted again: "That's quite a lot. We just perform, give speeches, and cut ribbons all day long."

"The appearance fee is quite a lot, right?" Cui Yu asked.

Zhang Xiao replied: "She is eighty, I am forty."

Song Yan quickly added: "It's all after tax."

"Pfft!"

"Hahahaha!"

"After paying the tax of 80 yuan, can I pay the tax line?"

"···"

Cui Yu asked, "Where did you cut the ribbon?"

Song Yan said: "They are all large and medium-sized enterprises."

Zhang Xiao continued, "Big pancake shop, blacksmith stove or something."

Song Yan quickly added: "Hey, there's a pretty big chicken farm over there, and I cut it all up."

Zhang Xiao said: "Yes, the next day she got bird flu after cutting. At that time, more than 1 chickens died. In the end, the big guys gave her a nickname, called Yijianmei."

"Pfft!"

"Have you cut it? It's a good nickname."

The audience in the audience laughed.

Song Yan on the stage finally couldn't take it anymore, and angrily said: "Can you suffocate you if you don't talk, can you suffocate you?"

Zhang Xiao said: "I can hold back my madness."

Song Yan said: "Why is it so annoying? Tell me, you... I don't care if I talk about those things of yours, I'll let you down, so I can save face for you."

After finishing speaking, she turned her head and said to Cui Yu: "I don't care about talking about him. If you say it's just him, I can sing for others. Do you think he can sing with this voice? On that day, he went to our nursing home to sing for others. , there were seven old men sitting under it, and he came out with a groaning voice, so he passed by and stayed."

Cui Yu said: "Then there is one left?"

Song Yan said: "there is another one who is the dean, he won't let go of my hand, that guy can shake his head: elder sister, elder brother's voice is too sudden, I can't stand it, hurry up and let elder brother go home, man Singing costs money, but he sings for his life!"

"Hahaha!" Song Yan's burden immediately made the audience burst into laughter.

Yang Mi in the audience even bent over with a smile, and said, "Reba, isn't your brother-in-law very interesting?"

Reba nodded and said, "My stomach hurts from laughing so much."

···
Zhang Xiao on the stage said angrily: "Hello, you have to go to the mental hospital to give a speech to others, and you have to speak all day and all night."

Song Yandu: "What's the matter, the mental illness has been discharged from the hospital."

Cui Yu said: "It seems to be effective."

Zhang Xiaodao: "Yeah, the mental patient has been discharged from the hospital, and the doctor is crazy."

Song Yan said angrily: "Which doctor is crazy, let me ask you?"

Zhang Xiaodao: "Doctor Cui is crazy, just that little Doctor Cui."

Song Yan said: "Why are you talking so irresponsibly? What do you think, Cui, don't worry too much. He didn't say anything about you, talking like that..."

"This is dementia, you forgot to take your medicine when you went out."

"Cui, let's keep chatting, chatting about literature, so that he won't interrupt."

"Why are you so annoying?"

Cui Yu said: "Then aunt, let's just talk about your book. I heard that your "Yuezi 2" is currently being written?"

Song Yan said with some embarrassment: "There are more than [-] words left before the deadline."

Zhang Xiao covered his face and said, "Oh my god!"

Song Yan said angrily, "Why?"

Zhang Xiao immediately covered his stomach and said, "Stomach hurts."

"Endure it." Song Yan said sharply, pointing to Cui Yu and saying, still angry, "You ask."

"Ouch." Cui Yu was startled, and the book in his hand fell to the ground.

The audience leaned forward and backward with laughter again.

"This is great too!"

"I give this skit full marks."

"The three of them cooperate very well."

"As expected of Xiao Shen's sketch!"

"···"

Cui Yu on the stage asked: "I heard that the reader is looking forward to it?"

Song Yan boasted: "How can you say that you are looking forward to it? You are looking forward to it. That guy, then... after watching "Confinement 1", you want to watch "Confinement 2", and you are holding back."

Zhang Xiao echoed: "This is true. It's quite uncomfortable to hold back. The village head, he went to our house and blocked the door and said: Don't let your daughter-in-law go away, hurry up and write "Moon." Sub 2, the toilets in the village are out of paper."

Song Yan was quite happy at first, but when she heard the last sentence, her face turned pale with anger, she stood up and said, "Xiao Cui, I'm sure you Sunny TV will block me, I'm leaving, I won't be recording anymore."

Cui Yu hurriedly said, "Why is aunt leaving again?"

Zhang Xiao grabbed Song Yan and said, "What are you doing?"

Song Yan said: "What are you talking about? You said that I wanted to point to this show to make it popular again, but you guys have pulled it off for me... It's all broadcast live, and everyone is watching."

Cui Yu said: "It's okay, the ratings of this show are low."

Song Yan said: "It doesn't matter if you're low, I'm a celebrity the size of Baiyun, let's go."

Zhang Xiao furiously said: "Let's go, what are you doing, you, Baiyun, you are a famous person, that's your personal name."

"Why do you say you are like this? You just finished recording "Tell the Truth" once, so why did you become like this? Huh?"

"We are little old men and women in the countryside, what kind of books should we write?"

"Writing a book before graduating from elementary school, you see, this family can write six words in seven days."

Song Yan said, "Why?"

Zhang Xiaodao: "I don't like to talk about you, you just get it honestly, you are so tired of living, you can float, you can't say which day the wind will blow away your cloud .”

(End of this chapter)