After getting married, a popular seiyuu suddenly moved to my house

Chapter 837 831. Once you die, there is nothing left to lose, and this is where the benefits of death lie.

What is right and what is wrong.

Haruki Murakami said that there is no right choice in this world, we just have to work hard to make the original choice right.

If I deny her at this time, part ways with her, and leave this girl who was dragged to hell by me, in front of the gate of hell, and escape alone.

Her life is bound to collapse.

I'm doomed to save no one.

Standing on the shore and watching and jumping into the abyss together are two completely different concepts.

Even if he couldn't save her, at least he could hold her hand tightly at the last moment.

I don't want to blindly deny her like I did in the past, nor will I accept her words 100% and follow her actions.

My heart thinks she is wrong, but I will never do anything to deny her.

She is already bruised all over, how can I still hurt her.

"There is sand..."

I reached out and touched her shoulder tremblingly, her narrow shoulders were trembling.

But I, can't give her a hug, I don't know why, I just don't think I can hug her at this moment.

I had to be like a parent comforting a child, stroking her hair gently and making my voice as gentle as possible.

"Yousha has worked very hard, very hard, and is willing to stay by my fallen side, bear tremendous pressure, and distort his will to cater to me constantly."

"........."

Yes, I can't keep hurting her broken heart.

Even if such an approach is unjust, I can no longer continue to hurt the girl in front of me who was almost eaten away by me.

"Yousha must be suffering more pain than I imagined. So far, I have enjoyed your concession for granted, and I have no scruples about you."

"Whether you betrayed Caiyin with me, or lied to Rina together, you must be pushing yourself all the time, it must be painful all the time.

But I didn't even notice such an obvious thing, I'm really... sorry. "

"These are all voluntary! I just want to be with Ren-sang, be it hell or heaven, wherever I go with Ren-sang, I will follow."

Her words must be sincere, without any falsehood, she can lie to anyone without changing her face, except that she will not deceive me, because I turned her into such a girl.

Gently covering her head with my hand, I thought for a long time.

No matter what she wants to do in the future, I think, I can't leave her alone.

"Thank you for everything you have done for me, so..."

"...He Rensang."

She was getting closer and closer to me, interlocking her fingers with me, her faint breath hit my neck, and she silently closed her eyes.

Looking at her trembling eyelashes, should I just kiss her?

But I can't just kiss Yousha like this.

I pushed her shoulder away: "Yousha, this is a hospital."

"Well... that's right, that's right." She scratched her cheek shyly.

She smiles like an angel, I can't remember how long I haven't seen her smiling face, even if no one is around me, everyone leaves me, only she will stand by me unconditionally beside.

To be selfish, I am naturally happy, there is nothing more gratifying than this, but on the other hand, I don't want to restrain her, I hope she can be addicted to things other than me.

Such contradictory moods dragged me back into the whirlpool I was once in.

"Hey, there is sand. Can you let me be alone for a while?"

"Heren-sang..."

"I see."

"Well, thank you."

……

……

After Yousha left, I sat on the bed for a long time, thinking about many things.

Now, I have regained my sanity, I can no longer treat them as my dolls, I hate what I did to them, but what I can't forget in my mind is the time I spent with them those days.

I clearly remember every day I spent with them, what they said, what they did, the softness of their lips, the warmth of their bodies, all these things are engraved in my body, and I will never forget them.

I know that I am not the protagonist of this world, and I cannot call them and the world to surrender to me like the protagonists in novels.

I'm just me, a weak and nasty normal human being.

If I want to be like this, let those girls with different personalities willingly stay by my side and share me with other girls, no matter what, it is impossible.

Thinking of this, I couldn't help showing a wry smile.

Why, I also began to fantasize about such an unrealistic future.

After getting out of bed, the dizziness in my head almost made me fall, I slowly stabilized my body, reached out to touch the wound on my forehead, and walked out of the ward step by step.

Standing in this empty corridor filled with the smell of disinfectant, I seem to be drawn into some kind of strange space, like a rookie player who was thrown into the Demon King City just after leaving Novice Village, wearing initial equipment and walking in the corridor densely populated by monsters stumble.

Where to go, where to go.

Holding on to the railing of the stairs, he walked aimlessly upwards. The stairs seemed to be possessed by an eternal demon, and there was no end in sight for a long time.

But reality is reality after all, and there is no eternal devil in reality. At the end of the road, there is only a double door that is closed tightly. Try to push it, and you can feel the cold wind blowing in through the gap.

The blue sky, the pure white sheets, and the insubstantial wind blowing the sheets of street photography, like groups of carp streamers swaying and parading in the deep sea.

I looked at this scene and was speechless for a while.

I took a step and felt the cold wind blowing on my face. The cool wind made my thoughts clearer, followed by the sadness that swept my whole body.

I thought of the girl who was suffering from a serious illness and showed a weak smile on the hospital bed.

I thought of the girl who was entangled by the stalker, but still faced the brave girl who was alone.

I thought of the girl who loved me and believed me with all her heart, and ended up being betrayed by her lover and friends.

Approaching the edge of the roof of the hospital, the barbed wire fence as tall as a person was blown loudly.

The sky above is very quiet, but the world below is quite chaotic.

Lowering your head slightly, you can have a panoramic view of the garbage-like human beings.

Well, this is just an exaggerated adjective. This inpatient building is not high, only five or six floors, far below the level of Sky City.

If I had to say it, I was the trash standing above.

And high-altitude parabolic is indeed an uncivilized thing.

Perhaps this thought existed in my heart. Even at this moment, the blood vessels and bones are filled with sadness and heaviness, which affects my decision-making all the time.

Once dead, there is nothing left to lose.

Here lies the benefit of death.

(End of this chapter)