old dream

Chapter 256
After confirming the next step, Ke Lin turned on the light in the bathroom while unconsciously thinking about Ji Lian's condition.But when he saw himself haggard in the mirror again, he suddenly thought of something.

No, not right.

Under the halo of the redstone lamp, he looked at his shrinking pupils.Colin thought of the 40 Ori again, and once again felt shuddering.

He immediately woke up and overturned all the decisions in his mind.

Since you didn't rule out the interference of Bod Ives.

No decision should be made at this time.

Do you think you know what you're thinking?He looked in the mirror and asked himself.

And how can you be sure those decisions were yours and not Board Elvis's?
"But once you can't even trust your own emotions, what else is reliable in the world?"

He lowered his head and turned on the faucet, rinsing his face repeatedly, trying to wake himself up from the fear of infinite doubt.

And reason and logic.

He walked out of the bathroom and sat down again at the desk in the small attic.Moved those white manuscript papers in front of him, and began to write after a long absence.

Who should I act for?
Colin.

What are Kelin's core interests?
He stared at this question in a daze, not knowing where to start.I feel that we should look for answers on a larger premise.

So who is Colin?

An alien visitor from Earth in 2019 AD.Maybe he wants to go home, but he hasn't found any valuable clues yet.

In addition, Colin is a survivor of the Senal battlefield; the leader of the bootlegging organization; a wizard who has just landed in Chierxingtian.

But these titles are only temporary, like autumn leaves that fall together on the ground by chance, and will soon be scattered by the wind.

So, he made a list of those stronger relationships that he used to further define his identity.The person who made promises to Ji Lian, the nephew whom Craigie hated... listed them one by one from close to external, filling a whole page.

Before all of this, Colin was first and foremost a human being, a creature.The basic need of being a living thing is to survive and reproduce itself.

But all other goals are still debatable.

So what about being human?He tried hard to recall the principles he most recognized in his previous life, trying to find a trustworthy anchor point from them.

Human nature, kindness within one's ability, and living up to it.

He completed the connotation and extension of each concept or object mentioned above, and wrote down all conceivable inferences.Afterwards, he listed his own understanding of Bod Ives' desires, and compared the two lists, he looked for places that might be infiltrated and used by parasites in daily life.

He looked back at his life, asked questions one by one, and reorganized the motivation for doing everything.

However, both reason and logic are only tools to achieve goals, and cannot provide purpose or value judgments by themselves.

So in the end, Colin painfully discovered that after eliminating all inner impulses and asking why layer by layer, only "survival" and "doubt" are left that can undoubtedly belong to him.

Once a person can no longer trust his own heart, one can get into such a pathetic situation.

He stared blankly at the blank paper for a while, then picked up the pen and added a sentence later:
"Complete the agreement with Ji Li'an."

But that's all?
Chewing on this long and frenzied half year, he was silent for a moment, and wrote later:

"After satisfying the above two points, try to be as 'light' as possible."

"This is a reasonable deduction from first principles, and it has been able to rule out the induction of Bod Ives."

It is precisely because of being overly immersed in obsession that he has no doubts about his impulse and is completely defenseless, and this is also the most dangerous state.

There is room for enthusiasm, even if you devote yourself to some goal again, believe in a certain story, you will always keep a light line of reason in your mind, and let it look on sternly.

So he wrote the last sentence:
"Do a weekly motivational check because the last thing He wants me to do is doubt."

These are the only four principles that can be identified that have not been influenced by Bird Elvis.

With this few gains, Colin patiently re-reasoned the decision on the bathroom.Found only some minor differences.He threw the pen aside, so he breathed a sigh of relief, confirming that He didn't interfere with his mood for the time being.

Although from an objective point of view, the pale goddess has also accomplished herself, Colin thought.

Without the obsession provided by him, it would be impossible for me to be reborn in just half a year.

But to experience that state of madness again?You may not be so lucky next time.

……

As soon as the spirit relaxes, the hunger also rises.After all, counting the series of battles in the old factory building, he hadn't eaten for nearly thirty hours.

Colin quickly walked to the kitchen and cooked some tuber food.During this period, he has been thinking about Ji Lian's illness.During the ceremony and mental integration, Colin heard fragments of the conversation between Nancy and Ji Lian, so he knew that Ji Lian might enter the dark river.

He has mixed feelings about this.Because finally there are people other than herself who realize her value, but these people are enemies again.

Being restrained by Nancy, it is difficult to set up a bacterial laboratory for Ji Lian in a short time.And any rescue move may backfire.

So joining the dark river became the most likely choice for Ji Lian to be rescued.

Colin sighed.Although he was unwilling, "Dark River" was the most secretive and most powerful organization in his cognition.It is not the same as any underground force that has been in contact with before.

Their shadows can be seen in every change in the pattern of the Senalese war, and that is only the tip of the iceberg of this organization.

Therefore, Ji Lian may usher in her best stage.

This is a good thing.He told himself while picking the food on the plate.

It was at this time that Colin glanced casually and saw some glass shards scattered on the restaurant floor.

He couldn't help stopping the tableware in his hand, and looked along the fragments, only to find that several redstone lamps installed in the dining room had all been broken.

Colin frowned, walked over to pick up the wreckage of the lamp and inspected it for a while, it was smashed by someone.Thoughtful, he took the wreckage and walked to the next redstone lamp, and saw that it was also destroyed.

Colin immediately turned back and walked towards the basement. When he passed the living room, he saw the messy wallpaper and furniture, and quickened his pace again.And in that dark corridor, all the portraits of the ancestors have been stained with blood, because someone's hand was cut by the cracked picture frame.Colin walked down the stairs quickly, pushed the basement door hard, and found that it was locked.

The hearth only ran for a moment and then stopped, as precise as a clock movement, but the force it sent to the crystal map was enough to break the door lock.Colin stretched out his hand, and the lock and the board fell to the ground, the cut surface was as smooth as grease.

The door slowly opened with a creaking sound, revealing everything in the darkness.

A chair was kicked over by the table, and manuscript paper was scattered all over the floor.Colin saw with complicated eyes that a suspended figure was shaking in the basement.

Craigie didn't wait for the news of Lentz's death, and hanged himself here first.

Colin walked over slowly, bent down and picked up a page of manuscript paper.Shaking it and unfolding it, I saw that it was covered with smudges and lines like graffiti.But part of the complete handwriting can still be seen.

"Technical Research on the Nerve Formation of Spiritual Sensation."

(End of this chapter)